Lilith (11 page)

An older woman with grey
short-cropped hair came forward. She narrowed her eyes viscously at Rachel but grinned toothily when she saw me.

"Fresh meat, ah Rachel? Well I'll take care of her, come sit with me
dearie."

I glanced at Rachel in protest but followed the older frail woman forward. She had to be in her
seventies, her face riddled with wrinkles, and her eyes held the light of someone who'd been through a lifetime of sorrow. Her grey eyes were all I could see about her that haunted me, they were familiar somehow, no matter how impossible that seemed.

She grabbed my hand and pulled me towards an old beat up brown couch. I sat beside her and tried to pull my hand free. She held it firmly, tighter than I thought she was capable of. She turned it over and ran a finger down the center, and a shiver ran up my spine.
I knew her, I could feel it all the way to my toes. I stared into her eerie eyes and waited for what seemed like forever for her to speak.

"My poor sweet Pacey, yo
u have seen death haven't you?"

I gulped in shoc
k.

"Twice now your life has been threatened, your body drained of blood. Someone watches over you carefully, a woman with your face, but her eyes ar
e different and older, wiser, than your own."

One hot tear ran down my cheek, how did she know so much by just holding my hand, by looking into my eyes?

"You've been blessed child, with the second sight, like me, yet you do not know how to harness this power. When the doctor's ask you about the truths you've let spill from your lips, lie. It is the only escape from here. I am only here because I want to be, I needed to be. I have been waiting these many years for a young purple-eyed girl, and you've arrived. I will help you leave this place, but first you must learn of your power. Lilith will kill you if you do not learn."

I pulled my hand from hers and wiped the tears from
my face. How could she know?

"How do you know?"

She smiled revealing her stained teeth. "The second sight child, I was too touched by Lilith, and I survived."

I watched her grey eyes fill with tears and stare off into the distance, looking at something or someone that wasn’t there.

"My younger sister fell in love once. Elizabeth didn’t realize that it was predestined, or that her love was a son of Adam. He was young, and charming, and handsome. Lilith saw my beautiful sister through her magical mirror and tried to kill her, to keep her from him. I tried to save her, but in the end, she died, and Lilith marked me instead.” Ruthie showed me her withered scars.

“My sister’s lover
died some years later, enchanted by Lilith’s empty promises he took his own life. But there is another way, to end her designs for your beau. Do you truly love him?"

I thought of Dean's blue lust filled eyes, and his hands that seemed to touch my skin like velvet. I loved him with every part of me.

"Yes."

Ruthie patted my hand softly and turned when she heard them announce breakfast. I didn't get a chance to s
peak to her again all morning.

After lunch Rachel came forward and told me I had visitors. My palms started sweating and my heart was beating so quickly I thought I'd throw up. Dean was out there waiting, with my dad and
Rhiannon. I wiped my hands across my pant legs and tried to untangle my crazy hair. Here goes nothing.

"Pacey." My dad smiled softly when Rachel
led me into the visiting room.

Dean smiled when he saw me, and I ran towards him. My feet moved without any effort in his direction, covering the distance betwee
n us in less than a heartbeat.

"Pacey, thank God." He pulled me into his arms,
and I immediately felt better.

I needed to see him, to touch him, to feel his strong heart beating beneath my ear. My dad cleared his throat and I looked over at him and
Rhiannon.

"Daddy." Tears ran down my face as
I walked into his waiting arms.

"Daddy, I'm so sorry." The words choked from
my throat as I swallowed a sob.

He always said he could never live without her, and I was the cause. I was her death.

"Oh Pacey, baby, I'm just glad you’re okay, your mo-mom." I watched my dad rub a hand across his face before he continued.

"Your mom would have died before she'd hurt you Pacey. I don't understand, I don't know what could have happened to her, to make her do this." My dad looked over towards Dean who bowed his head in shame.

How could they even manage to be in the same room together. Dean may not have given my mom the stab wound that took her life, but he'd injured her, and my dad stood staring at him like he was the one who'd done it.

"Dad,
it’s not Dean’s fault."

He looked up into my eyes and I could see the guilt written in his.

"I don’t blame Dean, I knew something was wrong Pacey, there were times, when her eyes would just go blank and empty. It wasn't like her she wasn't that cold. I, if I'd said something, made her go get help, maybe she'd still be alive, and she wouldn't have tried to kill you, our daughter, our living jewel."

After twenty minutes of tears and visiting my dad left me alone in the room with
Rhiannon and Dean. We had ten minutes before they had to leave, I tried not to look miserable when he left the room.

“Okay Pa
cey, we want the effing truth.”

I was taken aback.
Rhiannon wanted what truth, the real truth, or what happened in my room that day.

“Don’t look stupid sparky I know you better than lover boy here.
You’re holding something back.”

I took a deep breath and shook my
head.” I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Dean elbowed
Rhiannon and motioned for her to let it go. Of course, she wasn’t going to do that, not my Rhi, she was a bulldog when it came to something she wanted, she wasn’t going to let it go that easily.

“Screw
that, don’t lie to me. I want the truth, that wasn’t your mother who did that.” Rhiannon pointed to the bandage that still covered my arm.

“I’ve known your mom since I was six years old. There wasn’t a bone in her body that could harm you. Even Dean said she wasn’t herself, said she moved like a zombie, like
someone was wearing her skin.”

I flinched, that’s exactly how someone under Lilith’s influence looked, like someone unfamiliar with the body was wearing it.

“I can’t talk about this, look where I am Rhi, do you really think whatever’s happened is something I can tell you. I’m trying to protect you.”

“An
d a lot of good that did too didn’t it. Now your mom’s dead and someone has tried to kill you twice. How many more bodies are gonna drop before you trust us. I’m your best friend, there’s nothing you can’t tell me. So quit acting retarded and open up. We only have a few more minutes.”

I looked into
Rhiannon’s waiting face and groaned. There was no way I was getting out of this. I had to tell them the truth, and pray to God that they believed me.

Chapter Eleven

Committed

“Okay, but you asked for it.” I took one last deep breath and tried to piece together the fastest way to say what I needed to.

“Some psycho sadistic demoness is obsessed with Dean because he’s a dire
ct descendant of Adam. She wants him for herself and wants me out of the way, so she can have him. She can move into upset and easily manipulated woman through mirrors, and actually once, she was even in you Rhi, that’s why you didn’t remember saying something once, or had blackouts. Anyways, the only way to stop her is to destroy her magical mirror in her cave located in some sort of dream world called the “Hall of Mirrors” it’s like hell or an in-between world. She took over mom to kill me, and honestly I have no clue who she was inhabiting the first time she tried.”

I smiled a little at their confused faces, they’d asked for the truth. I felt a heavy weight move off of my chest and waited for their reactions.
Rhiannon was the first to say anything she laughed a little first then shook her head.

“Whatever you say Pacey, what kind of meds do they have y
ou on here cause that’s crazy.”

Dean narrowed his eyes at her then cleared his throat.
“Is this the same psycho that killed my ex-girlfriend?”

I watched Rhi’s face go white in shock.

“You’re serious?” She asked.

I groaned and rol
led my eyes. “Yea, totally.”

Rhi bit her lip and starte
d pacing across the small room. “Huh, well shit, what are we supposed to do about that?”

I shrugged and watched Dean smile in my direction.

“You really thought I wouldn’t believe you?” He asked. “Silly Pacey, don’t you know?”

I shook my head
and waited for him to continue.

“I love you no matter what. And if you say some crazy demon lady is trying to kill you because she wants me, well who am I to argue with that. I mean l
ook at me.”

Rhiannon
groaned and smacked his shoulder. “Not everyone wants you stupid.”

I chuckled s
oftly and reached for his hand.

“I love you too, but this is serious. And I don’t have a clue where to start or ho
w to get out of here.”

My mind drifted a little to the memory of a grey haired woman. Well I might have some ideas.

“Times up.” My dad walked into the room followed closely by Rachel.

I tried not to winch when I saw her and reached for Dean. He pulled me into a tight embrace and whispered into my ear.

“I love you. Me and Rhi will start looking for answers.” He released me and Rhi patted my shoulder.

“Come on Pacey time to go.” Rachel’s stern voice
pulled me quickly to the door.

I shared one quick hug with my dad and followed her out the door. I looked behind me once and caught one last glimpse of Dean’s face and remembered.

“Her name is Lilith, Dean, Lilith.”

Rachel stopped walking and turned to face me with judging eyes.

“Whose name is that Pacey?” She folded her arms across her chest and watched my face drain of color.

“Uhh just some new girls name at school. I wanted him to tell her sorry because I was her lab partner for a project.” I smiled casually and waited for her to call me a
liar and scream for the guards.

Her eyebrow went up questionably but she reached over with her badge and scanned the door. It clicked and popped and she opened it for me.

“After you.”

I followed her hand and walked inside. She led me back down the long hallway and to a windowed wooden door. A gold plate on the front said Dr. Michael Griffin. Rachel knocked softly and opened it whe
n we heard a cough from inside.

“Come in.”

I held my breath and put my head down as she pushed me through the open door.

“Ah hello Miss
O’Brien. You are two minutes late to our session. Please make a point of being on time, I hate tardiness.”

I looked over into Rach
el’s reddening face and sighed.

“Sorry sir.”

He nodded at Rachel and she left the room and closed the door. Dr. Michael Griffin stood and walked towards me. He reached out a hand for mine. I held mine out and squeezed softly in nervousness.

“Have a seat Miss
O’Brien.”

I looked at the empty overly stuffed chair and sat down. I could feel my pulse quicken under his watchful gaze.

“Now, I know this is your first day here, so I wanted to go over your schedule with you, and what it is we hope to accomplish here. Because of your mother’s death and your attempt on your own life, we would like to keep you here as a guest…for a short time.”

I swallowed down my nausea and nodded.

“Every day you will have group time in the common room, and then workshops throughout the day. You will also be given free time to indulge in television or reading, whatever it is you like. If you prove you can be trusted and accountable, you will receive certain…privileges. If you do anything you are not supposed to, or phase back on treatment you will lose these privileges. Do you understand what it is I’m asking of you?”

I nodded again and he stared at me silently.

“Ye-yes I, understand.” The words choked out of my mouth but I saw him smile his approval.

“Very good. Now since we have that out of the way, I would like to ask you so
me questions. Is that alright?”

“Yes, ask away.” I settled down into my chair more comfortably and held my breath in anticipation.

“Upon your entry, into the isolation part of our hospital you were screaming rather frantically about a woman, a demon named Lilith, do you remember this?”

I chewed on my lip and tried to remember the incident. I remembered thrashing, and crying, but nothing about what I said.

“No sir, I’m sorry, I don’t remember.”

His eyes
tightened and he continued. “Call me Dr. Griffin, is it alright if I call you Pacey?”

“Yes sir, I mean, Dr. Griffin.”

He smiled and I noticed his pale yellowy eyes. He was an older man probably in his mid-fifties. His hair was slightly graying, and his face had a whispering of wrinkles.

“Alright, Pacey, now do you know a Lili
th?”

I held my breath and remembered what Ruthie said about lying.

“No, not really, there’s a nurse here named Lilith right? Is that who you meant.” I bit my tongue to contain my idiocy, I didn’t want him to see through my lie.

“No Pacey, that is not who I meant. I meant the demon Lilith, you screamed about when you ripped
the stitches from your flesh.”

I winced under his harsh words and closed my eyes.

“Does that bother you Pacey, my speaking of your trying to commit suicide?”

I felt the tears start to well up into my eyes and tried to gain my composure. Was he trying to be mean?

“Yes Dr. Griffin, it bothers me to hear about my, my, my trying to commit suicide.” I gulped down a sob and watched his hard face soften.

“Okay, well that’s a good reaction to have Pacey, what you did was wrong, so you should feel bad about it. C
an you tell me why you did it?”

I shook my head and felt the tears spill down my cheeks.

“I-I don’t know why, I’ve never wanted to end my life before. Bu-but my mother had just tried to kill me, and Rachel had just told me she was dead, and I was upset. It was okay to be upset wasn’t it?” I could hear the plea in my voice and I watched him look away from my painful expression.

“Of course Pacey, you have been through something very traumatic. And I’m very pleased with how you are handling yourself right now.
It’s very admirable, I just want to make sure you won’t try and hurt yourself again. Okay?”

I wiped at my tears and bit my lip to try and compose myself.
“I don’t want to hurt myself Dr. Griffin, I want to go home.”

“I know Pacey, of course you don’t. But
it’s my job to keep you safe, and send you home healthy okay. Can you trust me?”

I n
odded and reached for a tissue.

“Good. Now I think that from what you’ve just shown me, you can be given a certain amount of leniency or pr
ivileges, would you like that?”

My eyes went wide in surprise.
“Yes, very much.”

He smi
led and opened his desk drawer. “Your father brought a few personal possessions for you.”

He pulled out a small bag
and held it out to me.

I grabbed it eagerly and inspected it. It was a small travel case my mom had bought me a few years back. I unzipped the zipper and glanced inside. A small brush, detangler, and a few cosmetics were inside. It also held my most beloved of possessions, my ipod. I reached for the pink familiar device and smiled.

“Thank you Dr. Griffin, this is great.” He reached for another bag and brought it towards me.

“We had to inspect everything carefully to make sure, there weren’t any dangers. Your friend brought three bags with her but we let her know that
you were only allowed the one.”

I took the small duffle bag and looked inside. It held a few of my favorite clothes, and a couple of small pictures without frames, and a roll of scotch tape.

“You can’t have frames yet, so we let your family know they could bring in snap shots and tape for your room. As long as you take your medication every day and try to participate in group sessions and therapy you won’t lose these new privileges. Do you have any questions?”

I shook my head.
“No sir, uh, Dr. Griffin.”

He motione
d towards the door and Rachel opened it softly.

“You ready Pacey?”

I grabbed my bag and headed towards the door.

“I see you have a few things there, that’s good
news.”

I
walked slowly beside her. She led me back around the hall and towards my room. Once inside she helped me tape up my pictures and put away my clothes.

“You have group in two hours, I’ll come get you, but it would be good for you to use the clock to set up alarms. As you gain privileges you gain responsibilities and eventually getting to group and therapy
on time will be some of them.”

I watched her walk through the door and lock me safely inside.
I took out my ipod and lay back on my bed. I needed to get out of here. If anyone sane ever had the misfortune of ending up in here, staying for a few hours was enough to drive the sanest of them crazy.

“Good morning Pacey.” Rachel’s annoyingly sun shiny vo
ice said to the dimly lit room.

I groaned and covered my head with my pillow. It had been three days since my arrival in observation. And today was my 18
th
birthday.
Yea me!

“I here today is you birthday.”

I sighed and sat up to stretch. Rachel’s smiling face made me want to scream.

“Yep, I’m super blessed too, I get to spend it here!” I plastered on a fake smile and walked into
the bathroom to brush my teeth.

I avoided looking into the mirror. I’d gotten pretty use
d to doing that now. Avoiding mirrors and people’s eyes. The doc said I was supposed to be getting out in a couple of days, I was turning out to be a pretty damn good liar. When he asked about Lilith, I pretended not to know what he was talking about.

Eventually I came up with the idea that Lilith had been my imaginary friend when I was a child. It seemed to subdue him so I stuck with that, and shared all the horrible feeling
s I had about losing my mother. I think I had cried more in the last week than I had in my entire life. It was strange how it changed me more than Lilith’s first attempt on my life.

I threw on a pair of warn jeans and a faded Sublime T-shirt. Each day I earned new privileges. Getting more clothes, and responsibilities were some of them. I had to help in the kitchen before and after lunch. And as long as I participated, which meant lied my ass off, in group, and
my one on one sessions I was good.

The Doc promised me he’d really consider letting me out over the weekend. Today was Friday, my Friday. I sighed and followed Rachel down the hallway. I stared at the familiar faces in the hall, two orderlies who’d held me down only days before smiled and waved, wishing me happy birthday. I tried not to
roll my eyes in their direction.

“So what do you want for your birthday?” Rachel’s chipper voice made me cringe again, the woman was so peppy that if you bottled her blood you’d probably see rainbows.

“What do you think?”

Rachel sighed and opened t
he electronically locked door. If I could just get my hands on her Key card, I could probably spring this joint. I shook my head and decided against it. Doc said a few more days, so that’s what I was going to hold onto.