Lightning Strikes (The Almeida Brothers Trilogy #3) (25 page)

“That plane went down twelve days ago. The hurricane has long passed.  There are no more excuses, Nina. There is no reason why you shouldn’t have found your way home by now, and you don’t exactly have the best track record with this judge.  Seems she’s finally tired of your games, so yes, the trial has been pushed to tomorrow.”

“I can’t believe this is happening.”  Nina covered her forehead with her hand, fighting tears.

“Look…” he sighed.  “I’ll drive out and pick you up.  Where are you?”

“I’m in fucking Utah.”

“Okay, I won’t drive out and pick you up,” he chuckled.  “How is it possible that you’re in Utah?  A week ago you were in Chicago.”

“These last few days have been madness beyond explanation.”

“So, will I be telling Judge Perkins that you aren’t going to make it?”

“No, I’m going to make it.”  Her eyes raced across the lot.  “I’ll be there.  Somehow.”

She hung up, and she looked back across the lot at Jack, who was down to his boxers in the laundromat.

“Fuck…” Nina turned away from him, feeling the first tear fall down her cheek.  “Shit, shit, shit.”

Had Jack been right all along?

Was she really a karmic curse?

Pacing the parking lot with desperate strides, Nina pressed the phone to her forehead and, after several minutes of introspection, dialed a number.  She slammed the phone to her ear, gnawing her teeth.

When he picked up, she was speaking through gritted teeth before he could even say hello.  “Anthony, how could you do this to me?”  She waited for an answer, and when none came, her voice rose.  “How could you do this to me?  I would never, ever, hurt you like this.”

A long sigh came in, followed by deafening silence.

Nina was sure he’d hung up.

Then, he spoke, sounding exhausted.  “Because you’re the only person who’s ever been hurt, right, Nina?  You’re the only person on the face of the planet who has ever experienced real pain, real loss; real struggle.  The rest of us are just lounging around on our marshmallow clouds, smelling roses and sipping daiquiris while we bask in
your
struggle, right?  I’ve got news for you; life is hard sometimes.  In fact, most of the time, it’s pretty fucking awful, and you’re not the only person alive who’s allowed to know that, Nina.  You’re not the only person alive who’s allowed to feel that.  Live that.  I’m living it.  The whole world is.  But I don’t make my problems other people’s problems.”

“And I do?” Nina beamed, covering her heart with her hand.  “I’m making my problems your problems?  That’s funny, because last I checked, we made our
problem
together.”

He took a deep breath.  The lack of response from his end went on so long she nearly smashed the phone into the asphalt.  “You can’t blame me for refusing to be stuck.  I don’t want to be stuck anymore.”

“And I
do?”
She dug her nails into the fabric of her top. “I’ve been fighting this for six long years, Anthony, so that I can finally be free.  If you’d have stood by me, like a real husband is supposed to do, you might’ve had a real chance at being free too.”

“This won’t free you.  How do you still not get that?  Revenge will never drive away the anger.  It will never drive away the pain.  It won’t
fix
you, Nina.  Only acceptance will do that.  The hand we got dealt was shitty—it was real shitty—but it was our hand, and we have to accept that.”

Her breathing grew labored as her moistened eyes searched the lot.  “I can’t believe you just said that to me.”

He sighed, again, as if this conversation was slowly sucking every inch of life out of him.

“I can’t fucking believe you just said I should accept this.  I will
never
accept this, Anthony.  And the fact that you can… that you
have
… proves that you’re not the man I married.”

“I’m not.  Which is why I’m finally ending this for good.  The trial is tomorrow morning, period.  Whether you’re here or not.  If you’re not, I get my half of the money by default.”

“This isn’t fair.  This isn’t
fair. 
You choose to accept this, and that’s fine, but you do
not
get to make that choice for me.  You don’t get to do that.”

“Trial’s tomorrow.”

He hung up before she could respond, but even as silence surrounded her and squeezed her bones, she couldn’t move.  Her eyes held onto the setting sun in the distance, and she knew it was over.

It was finally over.

And as the black clouds congregated and sent the first drop of moisture splashing to the tip of her nose, she was devastated.

Jack’s eyes flew to the door of the rundown laundromat when Nina pulled it open.  She felt her clothes sticking to her skin from the rain, which was falling harder and heavier onto the asphalt outside.

In nothing but his black boxers, he smiled at her from where his long legs swung down from the washing machine, motioning to his clothes, which he’d slung next to him.  “I waited for you, so you can throw your clothes in, too, if you want.”  His eyes traveled her body.  “And I hope you do since it involves you taking them off.”

She mumbled something incoherently, still in the doorway, unable to speak.  When a tear raced down her cheek and joined the raindrops on her face, she fought not to break down.

Jack’s face collapsed.  “Nina, what’s wrong?  What happened?”  He jumped down to his feet and yanked his pants off of the washing machine.

In his haste, he grabbed the pants by the ankles, upside down, and didn’t realize it until the sound of something clattering to the floor froze him in place.

Nina’s eyes fell to the floor and followed the objects that had fallen from the pocket of his pants.  One landed onto its side and rolled across the floor.

Nina’s eyes widened.

So did Jack’s.

She watched it hit the toe of her boot and then topple to a stop at her feet, and her blood boiled.  Tears filled her eyes as she bent down and seized it between her fingers, holding it up high.

Jack looked away, a flash of defeat in his eyes.

She clutched the object so tight her fingers lost circulation, and when she went to speak, the words barely left her mouth.  “What is this?” she finally managed to wheeze, her lips turning down.

Jack’s hand came up to cover his mouth, and when he looked back at her, he held it out, his own voice breaking.  “I can explain that—”

“What the
fuck
is this, Jack?” she screamed, shaking the bright red casino chip.  The rest of the chips had rolled to a stop, scattered at her feet.  “You had them the whole time?  The whole fucking time?”

“Calm down.”

“Calm down?”  Tears tumbled out of her eyes.  “This chip could’ve gotten us home a week ago.  Why would you do this?  Why would you hide this from me?”

“Because I wasn’t ready.”  His voice rose.  “Fuck…” He turned away from her, throwing his pants down on the dryer before leaning on it, letting his head fall.

“You weren’t ready,” Nina repeated, her voice deadpanned.  She kept the chip in the air where he could see it, shaking it.  “You have… no idea… what you’ve
done. 
You have no idea what it would’ve meant for my life to be home a week ago.”

Jack shook his head, his eyes closed, and then finally found the courage to look at her out of the corner of his eye.  He threw a hand through the air.  “I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to you.  Alright?”

She clenched the chip, hiding it from him, and let her fisted hand remain high in the air as his words sank in.  After a moment of silence, she wrung her hands together; biting her lip so hard she nearly drew blood.  “You need to call your family right now.”

Jack’s face changed.  He straightened.

Her eyes went hard.  “You need to call them,
right now
and have them wire enough money to get us both home.  I’ll pay you back every penny once I’m able to cash these.”  She bent down and scooped up the remaining chips from the floor.

“A few days ago you were telling me how much you were enjoying yourself.  That you wanted to take your time…” Jack shook his head and showed her his palms.  “What changed in an hour?  Just because I lied to you about some goddamn chips?  I was going to give them back to you the moment we got home.”

“Jack, can you please just call your family?”

He frowned.  “No.”

Nina turned away from him, fighting a scream.  She took a few healthy steps away, covering her mouth with her hand.  Seconds later, she thrust the door open and exited the laundry room completely.

She moved across the parking lot toward the bus, the rain pattering her skin and pasting her curls to her forehead. 

It wasn’t until Nina was at the rear wheel of the bus that she finally exploded, kicking the tire with all her might, over and over, until she was too out of breath to continue.  Hearing Jack’s shoes clicking in close behind her, she turned to him with a smile.

“Are you this much of a coward?”  Her heated eyes searched his as he came to a sudden stop in front of her.  “What kind of grown ass man can’t even face his own family?  What kind of grown ass man would rather hide a bunch of casino chips in his pocket than man up and talk about how he really feels? I need to go home, Jack.”

“We are going home.”

“I need to be home
right now.
”

“Since when?”

“God.”  She threw her head back.  “Oh my God, Jack…” She reclaimed his eyes.  “This is so sad; I could almost cry.  I want to cry for you right now.  You actually think this is real.”  She held her arms out and spun around, motioning to the mountains around them, the rain falling harder by the second.  “You think all of this
bullshit
is real.”

Jack lifted his chin high, squinting at her.

She pointed at him.  “I don’t know you, Jack.  You don’t know me.  We don’t know a damn thing about each other.  It’s been fun disappearing from the real world for a little while.  Drowning our problems away in this… this
fantasy
we’ve created between each other.  But the real world never went away, Jack, and it never will, no matter how badly we want it to.  Eventually, we’re going to have to wake up from this fairytale and get back to reality, and I need to get back to reality
tonight. 
So will you please, for once, face up to the problems you created for yourself, call your family, and end this charade for good?”

Jack let her words sink in, doing nothing to try to hide the rapid reddening of his eyes or the tremor to his voice when he spoke.  “That’s what this is?  A charade?”

“Yes.”

“It’s a charade, Nina?”

“Yes, Jack.  A charade.  A mockery.  A couple of deeply insane people, masquerading as carefree drifters.  The truth is that neither of us is really carefree, Jack.  Neither of us is really happy.  Both of us are running, but I can’t run anymore.”  She took a deep breath.  “Now will you call your family?  Please?”   When he didn’t answer, she cursed under her breath and turned away from him again, digging her hands into her hair.

“You know, I thought I was angry,” Jack said, the rain slicking his hair to his skin.  He felt his clothes being pasted to his skin, as well, but couldn’t make himself seek shelter as he looked across the lot at her.  Her hair was pasted to her skin, too, the gentle ringlets growing longer with each passing second as the rain wet them and stretched them.  They curled around her glistening breasts, dripping tiny droplets into the deep v of her top.  His breathing picked up.  “But you.  You are really, really angry, Nina.”

She cut her eyes at him, pushing her hair out of them.  “That’s rich coming from you.”

“At least I have to balls to embrace it.  I’m not in denial about it.  It’s just my fucking reality, and I accept it.  But you… you work so fucking
hard!”
His voice rose.  “Trying to pretend it isn’t there. But I see it.”  He pointed at her.  “I see you.  You’ll rake me over the coals about my secrets until you make yourself sick, but goddamn if you’ll
ever
acknowledge your own.”

She turned and stomped away, moving toward the piano bar.

Jack jolted, and his body was moving his legs before his mind could think to stop them.  Her arms were under his hold in an instant, and his eyes shrunk when she tried to reclaim them, to claw them out of his hold.  She turned to him while trying to pull out of his grasp, her eyes rising to his.

“Let go of me,” she demanded. “Let go of me, Jack.  Fuck!  You wanted to be away from me so badly—from the moment we met; you’ve been trying to get away.  Here’s your chance.  Call your family.  Call your family so we can go home and be out of each other’s lives for good.”

“No.”

She shook her head, giving up the fight to reclaim her arms while shaking her head at him.  “I can’t fix you,” she whispered.  “And you sure as hell can’t fix me.”

“Why does anyone need to be fixed?” he demanded, shaking her.  “Why can’t we just
be
, Nina?”

She laughed, blinking against the rain falling from her eyelashes.

“Don’t laugh at me,” Jack said.  “Don’t laugh at me for giving a damn about you.”

“I never asked you to give a damn.  I never wanted you to give a damn.”  She laughed, again.  “I chose you, Jack…”

His eyes grew ripe, shrinking into a confused squint.

“I chose you
because
you’re empty.”  She pounded her fists into his chest.  “
Because
you can’t feel
. 
Don’t go changing on me now, alright?  Don’t fuck it up now.”

“I care about you,” Jack whispered.  “I feel
…
for
you
.”

She froze, the rain meeting the tears on her face, erasing them completely.  But she couldn’t erase the pain in her eyes.  “No, you don’t.”

He swallowed, and when he nodded, the rainwater saturated his hair, dripping down his face in rivers.  “I feel for you.  And I’m not going to let you do to yourself what I’ve been doing to myself for years.  What I’ve been doing to myself up until the moment I laid eyes on you.  I knew the
moment I saw you
, Nina, and I was stupid enough to try to run from it.  I ran hard, and I understand so succinctly why you’re trying to run right now, but I’m not going to let you.”

“We fucked,” she screamed, crying out when the words caused him to release her arms.  She held them out at her sides.  “I sat down next to you on that plane, and I thought you were smoking hot.  I thought, ‘wouldn’t mind a couple of rolls in the sack with that one.’  That was
it,
Jack.  God, if I had known it would make you latch on like an infant…” She didn’t finish.

His teeth chattered as his clothes and skin joined.  A chill raced through his body.  “Don’t do this.”

“You were just a hard dick.  You don’t care about me because you have no fucking idea how to do that.  Just like you didn’t know how to do it with the bride you abandoned in Cambridge, just like you don’t know how to do it with the family you’re too chicken shit to call because
God forbid
you set yourself up to love somebody who just might love you back.”  She went to turn away but froze when he spoke again.

“It won’t work on me, Nina.”

Her head fell.

“This thing you’re doing right now?  I invented it.  I
invented
this, and it won’t work on me.”

“Don’t go pulling the good guy card on me now.” She faced him, motioning to him.  The strap of her top had lost its elasticity in the rain, making it fall off her shoulder.  “You’re the kind of man who leaves his blushing bride at the altar.  The kind of man who’d rather die alone in an empty brownstone than risk playing and losing.  The kind of man that can fuck and forget. That is who I sat down next to.  That is who I chose.  That
is who you are.  Be that guy.  Be that guy who waits until the very last fucking second, until he’s standing across the altar from the starry-eyed “love of his life”, in front of all her friends and family, to decide he doesn’t want her anymore.”

“I already told you.”  He chuckled.  “I didn’t leave the love of my life at the altar.  The woman I thought I loved was sitting in the pews, and I left her.  I left a woman who couldn’t love me back.  A woman who loved my brother more.  Who couldn’t decide which of us she loved more until she’d finally fucked us both.  I left her in those pews,
believing
that I loved her… and I believed it with every fiber of me.  But now I know what’s real.  I know the truth.”

Nina’s breathing eased, arms lifeless at her sides.

Jack stepped closer, looking down at her, his heaving chest rising and falling in time with hers.  “I left her… because I could.”

Nina’s eyes jammed shut.

“But for the goddamn life of me, Nina, I cannot
…”
He laughed, slicing his hands into his hair with a bewildered shake of his head.  “I
cannot
leave you.  I cannot walk away from you.”

Her eyes opened slowly, filled with grief.

“I can’t do it.  I don’t know
how.
”  This time, when he took her arms, she didn’t pull away.   “Now, I don’t know what it is about this bus breaking down that has you this upset—after all the shit we’ve been through, but I think if we’ve learned anything from this experience… it is that there will always be another train.  There will always be another plane.  There will always, always, always be another automobile.”  When she didn’t smile, his own grin wavered.  “It’s going to be fine.”

“No.”  She yanked her arms from his grasp, cringing.  “It’s not going to be fine, Jack.  I
have
to be in New York.”