Lies & Lullabies (27 page)

Kyle would be vengeful, and if he told Michael where I had been, all my fears would’ve come to fruition.
 

“Why am I a special snowflake?” I leaned forward, tipping up on my toes to give him a kiss.
 

He balked at my attempt and moved away to sit on the couch situated on the far side of the room.

“I rinsed my mouth out and gargled, five times.” I held up five fingers for emphasis. “I’m completely of my own sound mind and body.”

“It’s only been a few hours. I doubt that.”

“You waited for me, for three hours?” I glanced around the room for the time. It was almost one o’clock in the morning.
 

My heart began to race, knowing that Michael would have a fit. He called into the guards at 1 a.m. to make sure I was there. The bodyguard ran a check of the house to find me. This time, he wouldn’t find me.

Inhaling, I released a steady breath to calm myself down.
 

Black Mask took notice and leaned forward with a smirk, clasping his hands across his gaped open long legs. “Don’t do something outside of who you are,
Lolita
.”
 

Our eye contact was unshakeable and focused. We communicated in the silence, negotiating and debating what we both wanted. I was already found out, and I was going to make the night count.
 

I glanced at the door; the lock was engaged. I played his game and with an unsure hand, I dropped the towel from underneath the jacket, letting it fall to the ground. I put my hands on my hips opening the jacket.
 

I didn’t need to say anything. He turned off the only light illuminating the space and stood in front of me, taking me into his arms and pinning me against the couch with his body before I felt the need. His kisses were incredible, and his hands found all the right places to set me on fire. I reached down to unzip his pants, and he held my hands up, putting them above my head and tried to enter me.

I couldn’t help the squeal of pain that escaped unexpectedly and pressured him to stop. “No. No, please don’t stop. Keep going.” I clasped his head looking up into a glimmer of blue eyes, one of the few things I could see in the darkened room.

“You should’ve told me.”

“I didn’t want it to stop you.”

He brushed his lips against mine, teasing me by holding back from giving me a full kiss. “Why now, and why with me?”

“Because this might be my last night on Earth and you’re the first nice guy I’ve met.”

“Is that all it takes?”

“When you’re in the middle of a land without the sun, and you finally get a taste of what the light feels like on your face, it’s enough.”

“Keep speaking that way and I’m going to think you’re still a little drunk.”

“Are you going to continue?” I asked with a laugh.

A finger brushed against my lips, making them part. “Is this really how you want to remember you first time?”

I slowly smiled. “Make it something I won’t ever want to forget.”

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Panting and winded, my chest heaved against Black Mask’s almost fully dressed body. I’d done things I had no name for and was taught things I couldn't describe. I asked him to make it memorable, and he definitely delivered.
 

I hoped when the alcohol left my system I’d remember every minor detail; I didn’t want to forget.

“What was that?” Although I could barely see his face, I knew he was smiling. “What I really mean to say is, I thought men didn’t last that long. Three times? In…”

“It’s almost five in the morning,” he said, sounding as smug as I was sure he looked at the moment. “I set the bar for all other men.”

“I think you did.”

Holding me, he flipped me over to rest my back on the couch. His tongue blazed a trail from my Cupid’s bow to the tip of my nose, eliciting a soft laugh from me. Parting with a gentle kiss, he rose.

A glimpse of a larger than life raven on the side of his shoulder blade was all I was permitted to see when a brush of wind moved the blackout curtains. The moon shone on his tan back, revealing only a piece of what might’ve been a larger tattoo; the dark prevented me from finding out.
 

The second he flipped on a light, I slid off the couch and fit myself into his jacket. Grabbing a few tissues from the brass box on the desk, I cleaned myself off. I was left sore, but it was worth it. I had spent three more sessions with my masked man in making my first, second, and third time memories I wanted to keep.
 

He kept his back to me as his arms moved about to button up his shirt. After flipping on the light switch, he turned to me and began to remove his mask.

“Don’t.” I shook my head, holding my hand out to stop him. “Can we keep it this way?”

“I take it you don’t have plans to see me again?”

“It’s not because I don’t want to,” I explained, the disappointment weighted my words. “It’s because I can’t. I want you to keep all your appendages and live to see another day. I hope you can understand. Believe me, it’s not because I don’t want to see you again. I’m pretty…pissed about it. Trust me.”

“We’ll see what I can do about that.”

“I—”

“I’ll take you home,” he cut me off from warning him about Michael. At the time, I hoped he’d take my advice to heart, because it would’ve been the final straw to break me if Michael did something to him.

Black Mask rummaged around the desk in search of an item. Returning to me, he held up a few paperclips. He manipulated the jacket, keeping the clips unseen and fixed the jacket to give me enough coverage to leave.
 

A gentle kiss on my forehead made me smile. “You’re the first woman to make me lose control, and I can’t formulate the reason.”

I moved my hands down a wrinkle in his shirt. “You said you’re not usually a nice guy. Maybe that’s why?”

“Maybe.” He sighed as he fingered my chin. “I wasn’t only referring to it happening, but
what
happened.”

“Oh!” I slapped my hand on my forehead, panicking. The creasing of his forehead threw me into lying to him; my irresponsible slip up made in the heat of the moment would be taken care of later. “I’m on the pill.”
 

“You’re a virgin—were a virgin.”

“I get really bad periods.” I closed my eyes and shook my head. “Shit. You probably didn’t want to know all of that.”

He laughed and kissed my lips. He glanced out the window for a minute. A stark coldness took residence on his face, an expression he had never used toward me. “I have something I need to do.” Suddenly detached, he remained with his back facing me. “Meet me out front. I won’t take long, and then I’ll take you home.”

“Please, don’t take too long,” I pleaded.

He glanced at me from over his shoulder, the mask breaking a little for me. “I won’t.”

I sashayed downstairs, smiling and ignoring the soreness between my legs that demanded I grimace at every turn. The party had wound down and only a few uniformed maids in T-shirts and slacks were around to clean up the mess the celebration had left behind.

I opened the front door to the home, and I was met with an argument between Michael and Deana in the middle of the circular drive. The anger fueled behind Michael’s slap to Deana’s face sent a bolt of hatred straight to my heart.

She spun toward the car, catching a glimpse of me. Her eyes watered, apologizing to me for the unknown. Michael followed where her gaze landed, and gestured to Tyler who stood beside him.
 

“Take her home. I’ll deal with her when I get there.” Michael marched toward me and roughly grasped my arm. “Say goodbye to Deana because it’s the last time you’ll ever lay eyes on her.” I was shoved into the back of a car. He quickly followed me and slammed the door behind our entry. As he settled into the seat next to me, he tugged at the lapel of my jacket. “You fuckin’ somebody in there?”

I shrugged off his question, having no intention of answering it. Anger surged through my body, coaxing me to shake with tears.
 

“Since you want to keep playing up the silent shit and can’t keep your goddamn legs closed, watch me take the sun away from you.”

As I stared out the window, the otherwise better days of my life sullied and marred, I dried my tears away and fought to stop crying. I forced myself to shut down, promising I’d never show Michael he could affect me and let the icicles glaze over my heart.

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-19-

T
HE
U
NWINNABLE
F
IGHT

I returned to the house on the tail end of a cab departing the driveway. I only caught a glimpse of blonde hair belonging to the woman in the backseat and not much else. She was long gone and out of running distance by the time my foot slid across the driveway.
 

I thought of the night I found a jelly substance between my legs. The persistent exhaustion, the bouts of sickness, the all around sensation that something was off inside me; it all pointed to one thing. I clutched my hands over my stomach, wondering how it could’ve been true and how Catch knew, when I had no clue.
 

Distracted by my thoughts, I convinced myself of my invincibility. As it turned out, once my armor was worn down, I became breakable.

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Day quickly became night, darkening the sparring room. My limbs were stiffening and the ever present exhaustion threatened to make me forget about my plan. I unfolded my legs from sitting on the mat and stretched while I extended my legs.
 

The shifting of the front door and the subsequent closing told me Catch had returned from wherever he went.
 

I flipped on the light switch and caught his attention from the hall. He walked toward me, stopping shy of hugging distance. His inexpressive mask was ever present. “Enjoy your walk?”

I pulled the picture of the little girl from the band in my leggings and held it up, showing the photo to him. After he set his eyes on it, I walked over to the quilted wall, and fixed it in place using a leather strap meant to hold weapons.

“I want a rematch,” I told him, swiveling around to face him. “No weapons.”

He broadened his shoulders, his lids falling heavily down his blue eyes. “We did this once. I don’t like repeating myself.”

“Coward,” I mumbled, pacing my steps toward him. “What are you afraid of? Think you’ll hurt me? What do you care about causing me pain?”

The transformation was apparent. He turned colder, rigid. He whipped off his suit jacket and tossed it to the floor. Cracking his knuckles, he forced his chin to his chest and glared at me through his lashes. “Your move.”

Fueled by purpose and pent-up feelings over what he had done to me, I showed him what I was capable of. Every counter had an open. Every blow was deflected. I moved with dark intentions. Neither one of us had broken a bone, landed a hit, or made each other bleed and it was far from the point. I showed him what I needed him to see: He was my equal. He wasn’t better than me, and he hadn’t broken me beyond repair.
 

It was soured by one blinding realization; he wouldn’t give me his all. It was a fraction of the prowess I witnessed the first time we sparred. Many times he could’ve landed a hit—I purposely left him open to do so—and he never did.

He suddenly stopped, his arms falling limp to his sides. I drew down my arm and thrust it upward, landing an uppercut on his chin with enough force to make him stagger to the side. He took his time standing upright and slowly turned back to me, blood trickled from his mouth. He sucked the dark red liquid from his lips, his eyes burrowing holes into me. “You thought she would distract me?”

“Looks like she did. Where’s your fight, Catch?”

Ignoring me, he glanced at the picture on the wall. “Where did you get it? Jory’s book of secrets?”

 
“She’s the one of many you killed to take apart the family,” I snapped, my voice guttural and drenched in anger. “What was the point? To take all the families apart so you could run Los Angeles?”

His eyes widened and he put an end to the game by doing a sweep kick I didn’t see coming, sending me flying to the floor.
 

I swirled around and vaulted to my feet.

“I’m going to ask again.” His voice was unruffled, his demeanor more so. If I hoped to affect him to a point where I could easily see it on his face, I’d failed. “Did you get the picture from Jory?”

“Do you remember the party back in August, Catch?” As I asked, I remembered and it took me to a different place.

His eyes flickered at me, and his features relaxed. Suddenly, the formidable man was no longer standing in front of me. It was the man who made me feel and gave me memories worth keeping.