Lies in Blood (57 page)

“
You still don’t want him to die for you, do you?”

I shrugged. “Seems pointless. There’s never gonna be a baby now, so…”

“
That’s not it, Ara,” Jason said. “He’s not doing this to protect the child. He’s doing it because he’s got nothing left to live for.”

“
He has a monarchy. He has his uncle. I—”

“
You don’t get it.” He smiled at me, making all his lovely white teeth visible. “He hasn’t got you.”

I thought about that for a second. “I understand that. But why does he care? He doesn’t want me anymore.”

“
It’s . . . he’s lost faith. He never believed in happiness until he found you, Ara. And now that’s gone, he thinks he’ll never find it again. He doesn’t really see any reason to stick around.”

“
Well, he doesn’t get to make that decision.”

“
Try to stop him,” Jase said, and we both smirked, shaking our heads.

“
He’s impossible, isn’t he?”

“
You didn’t have to grow up with him.”

I laughed out through my nose, then nodded at the package behind his back. “So, what you got there?”

“
Gift?”

“
What kind of gift?”

“
For you,” he said, presenting it with a nod of his head.

I took it in my lap and considered it for a second: it was square, fat, velvet-red, all bound neatly with a silky black ribbon. “What is it?”

“
Open it, silly.”

The knot slipped apart like water over glass, and fell away from the velvet with only one small pull.

“
I thought you could wear it when you go walking in the forest, rather than trying to find your clothes again every time,” Jase explained. “It’s bright, easy to see, and I figure you can hang it off a branch or something.”

I held up the cloth and my mouth opened in shock as it unravelled in heavy layers. “It’s . . . Jase, it’s beautiful.”

“
Wanna try it on?”

“
I’d love to.”

He stood up and took the cloak, holding it out for me. I wriggled out from under my warm covers and pulled my nightdress down over my undies, turning my back so he could cloak me. And it wrapped my shoulders like a blanket, kind of heavy and warm, with that new fabric smell to it, as if it’d just come from the tailor.

“
It’s perfect, Jase.” I turned around to face him.

He tied the ribbon up just under my collarbones, drawing the hood over my head after. “And it’ll keep you warm, too, when it gets colder out.”

I looked up at him from under the cloak, changing the smile in his eyes. “Thank you, Jase.”

“
You’re welcome, Ara.” He leaned in and kissed my head, then pulled away as if gravity were forcing us together. “I’ll see ya later, okay?”

“
Okay.”

I watched him leave through the secret door, standing in the darkness of a dawning day as if I could slow it down or make it go away. This one would be like the next, and so on and so on, until, one day, David would take that dagger and kill Drake, and I would wake up to the rising sun, but I’d never really see the light again. David didn’t want to live now that he’d lost hope. And I didn’t want to live in a world without him.

There was only one way to solve this issue now—one way I could save David. If there was no contract, Drake wouldn’t be a threat. And if there was no me, there could be no contract.

I tossed the cloak aside and ripped my clothes off.

The solution had been staring me in the face the whole time. He didn’t need to die if there was nothing to die for. He could have the life he always wanted. It would be my gift to him for saving me from the darkness I sunk into all those years ago after I lost my mom—the same darkness I’d never really escaped. I owed him this much. For all the pain I’d caused him, and for all the love I would eternally feel for him, I at least owed him a future as king.

***

Quaid stood as I opened my door. “Morning, Ara.”

“
Morning, Quaid.”

“
Off for your dawn walk?”

“
Yup.” I closed my door, fastening the cloak around my naked body. “You can head off for a coffee break, if you like.”

He stuffed his phone in his pocket and flashed me a toothy grin. “I’ll see ya in an hour.”

“
Yeah.” I tried to smile. “See ya then. Oh, and, Kumar?”

He’d taken leave quite eagerly, but when I addressed him like that, he stopped and very slowly turned around to face me. “Yeah.”

“
Could you hold onto this for me?” I reached into the little side pocket and pulled out a small handwritten note. “I was going to give it to Jason later, but I don’t want to lose it in the forest.”

He took the note and thumbed the edge, his eyes staying on it. “What is it?”

“
Just a letter,” I said casually and walked past him, holding my head high, even though I just wanted to break apart inside. Of all the people I was leaving behind, I knew it would hurt Jase the most. I didn’t know who to write a farewell letter to, but I knew anything I wanted to say to anyone I cared about would be passed on by Jason. He was the only one I could truly trust. And I knew I could trust Quaid to give it to him.

The red cloak brought me comfort as I glided like frost over the slated floors toward the Throne Room, passing beneath the cold arches of the manor, blending with the blue shadows of dawn. The words to my letter moved across my lips like a prayer, travelling with the hopes that each farewell would find its recipient. Especially David. There were few words I could offer him as goodbye, and not once did I use the word ‘sorry.’ He knew, deep down, that I was sorry and that what I did would slowly and surely have destroyed me more than it did him. I didn’t need to tell him that. One day, centuries from now, when he found someone else to love, he would wake and realise all that I would have said anyway. Only then would it mean he was ready to listen.

The great Throne Room doors opened gracefully, as if welcoming my footfalls to the road ahead. Here, I began my journey home again. Here, I would farewell my past and all the mistakes, and move forward. Finally free.

I left the cloak at the base of the hill outside and entered the forest in my pure form, closing my eyes and feeling the energy of Nature guide me, gliding through the base of the trees like wind at my feet. It moved me forward quickly, sending word a breath ahead that I was on my way home—that I was coming to return to the place we all once began.

“
Spirits of the forest,” I whispered, “Show me how to return to that which created me.”

The world went silent, the breeze dying away with the song of birds, and the leaves in the trees coming to a standstill, all waiting as if holding their breath, watching as the spirit of Mother Earth made herself known in this place. I closed my eyes and imagined her there by the Stone up ahead, with open arms welcoming me.

And I knew what to do—as if her voice itself whispered the answer in my ear.

One foot over the other, I walked at a pace respectful to the flow and ease of all things living, existing, breathing this world of life in the rhythm of Nature. And as I came upon the Stone, fell to my knees and swiped a nail tip across the centre of my palm, drawing blood to the surface of my skin. She wanted it back—Mother who guarded the gateway between worlds. One must offer blood for anything asked of this Stone. I understood that now. Life, knowledge, magic: all of it could be mine for the exchange of this substance inside me that was connected more richly to the earth at our feet than this very platform in front of me.

I laid my hand to the Stone and felt it reach up, felt the life force inside it move to the blood on my palm and draw it away. “Take me home,” I whispered my hot breath into the rock. “Free me from the binds of this world so that I might save my people—save the king.”

I waited, imagining for a moment how Jase would react to my letter, imagining how relieved he’d feel. I knew relief wasn’t what I’d be leaving behind, but after some time passed, I knew everyone would see that this was for the best. One day they would come to understand why I did this. I’d failed at so many things, and for once in my life, I would die getting something right.

“
Auress,” a ghostly voice said.

I didn’t need to look up. Didn’t need to see where She stood. I could feel her beside me, feel her touch on my skin. I closed my eyes and smiled. “Mother.”

“
Young Auress, defender of all natural things, protector of this realm. Why do you seek to free yourself of your claim?”

I placed my other hand to my bare chest. “I broke him. I hurt him deeper than any soul should ever hurt, Mother. I can’t save his heart, but I at least owe him his life.”

“
A wise decision, young goddess. But not the only path that was laid at your feet.”

I nodded. “Yet, it’s the one I’m choosing.”

“
And what of
her
?”

“
Her?” I asked, trying hard not to open my eyes.

“
Your child.”

“
There is no child.”

I felt her touch become warmer, almost as if I could feel her smile. “Would you still want to die if I told you I foresee a child in your future?”

I swallowed, my bleeding hand stinging now, going cold as the connection to the earth flickered, fading. “David won’t give me a child now, and even if he did, I can’t stop Drake from taking her, not if he lives.”

“
Ara!” A desperate voice hollered through the dawn shadows, stealing the tranquillity for a second.

I turned my head and looked for the mother, but there was only warmth there where I imagined her. “Hurry,” I pleaded. “Take me now before they come.”

“
Ara!” It called again, and beyond the fog I saw faces, sharpening and taking shape before my eyes: Mike, Quaid, Emily, Arthur, and Jason.

“
Grab her, Mike!” Emily cried.

“
Don’t!” I ordered, my voice coming through my lips in a deep, almost baritone whisper. “Only an Auress can enter here now. You’ll die, Mike.”

“
Ara, please,” he begged, taking a step closer.

“
Don’t touch me.” I aimed my finger toward him, the command of my voice stopping him in his tracks. He looked down at his feet, trying to move them, but they wouldn’t shift. “I’ve made my choice,” I said, searching their eyes as my gaze travelled over each face. “This is the only way.”

“
Ara?” Jason stepped into sight, reaching out to me but not daring to come close. “I read the letter. I know,” he said, his eyes holding the weight of everything I told him. “I know, okay, and you don’t have to do this.”

“
I’m the only one nobody will miss, Jase.”

“
Oh, Ara.” He dropped quickly to a squat, covering his mouth. “Please don’t think that way. You matter to me, okay. More than anything in this world, sweet girl, and I’ll die without you. You can’t go.”

I turned back, laying my other hand on the Stone. “It’s already done.”

“
No!” he cried, and my heart skipped a beat when Arthur sternly said David’s name, telling him to
do what he had to do.

I could feel David here with me then—feel him connected to the earth through me. But it didn’t matter. None of them could touch me. None of them had the power. I was completely wrapped up in the hands of my maker, already wedged between this world and the next.

I focused harder on my hands, feeling my wrists and arms go through and touch the world on the other side. And it felt like magic, like a warm, happy feeling right in the centre of my chest. Every problem I ever had just fell away then, like petals off a dying rose, making me laugh for that moment. We all took things so seriously there in that world, and as I looked upon the other realm, I realised as deep as my soul was living, that on this side, nothing mattered—not the past, not our mistakes, not our failings as humans, and not our regrets. Here, we were all just life without consciousness.

“
Ara?”

I looked down to the cool, familiar hands wrapping my ribs—smooth against my pale, naked skin, and both of us stared for a moment, open-mouthed as the black Mark of my betrayal faded under his touch, bubbling and reseeding back into my body. “David, let me go. Please.”