Lex (Unconventional Hearts) (17 page)

Sirens erupt in the night air.

“Hey.” I quietly mutter, chewing on my bottom
lip.

Stopping dead in his tracks, Gage drops his
half smoked Black & Mild on the ground, takes three long
strides and engulfs me compassionately into his thick, heavily
tattooed arms. His busted hand lovingly strokes the back of my
head, as his lips press into my hair.

I feel so safe in these arms.

Pressing a sweet lingering kiss into my hair,
he inhales my scent. With a loud exhale, his body releases his iron
stance and he relaxes against me, melding us together.

“Are you okay?” he asks in a near
whisper.

“I should be asking you that.” I wrap my
hands around his waist and turn my head so it’s resting on his
chest. I can smell him and he smells so good. Like fragrant
tobacco, bergamot, mandarin, clove, blood, and musky man. It’s
wondrously divine.

“I’m fine. Did he hurt you? Do you want to
sue him?” His worried tone isn’t lost on me. His words are heavily
laced with sadness and regret, as he combs his fingers through my
hair.

Shaking my head against his hard yet soft
peck, I mutter. “No, but you might go to jail. He could die.”

“So…” I feel him shrug.

Closing my eyes, I drift into a blissful Gage
bubble. I hear the ambulance arrive and Lincoln, but I don’t care.
My adrenalin has drastically plummeted and I’m suddenly beyond
exhausted.

Sighing, I nuzzle my nose into his sensual
heat and he lets me stand here in the alley, enveloped in his
protective arms. As one of his hands caress my hair and the other
soothingly rubs my lower back.

“Is my girl alright?” I hear Lincoln ask.

Kissing my hair again, Gage responds. “Yes…Do
you need to arrest me?”

“Did he try to rape her?” Lincoln with an
overly concerned tone asks.

“Yes, Roni found them. I saw Lex go back to
the bathroom and never came back. I didn’t think a thing about it.
Roni must have, because she went lookin’ for her, broke his nose
before I got my hands on him. If you want to arrest me, do it. But
do it after I hold her a little while longer.” He pulls me tighter
and kisses my head. “Then I’ll come, you can even put me in the
back of the cruiser and read me my Miranda Rights.”

I can’t believe he’s willing to go to jail
for me.

“Naw, way I see it, he got what he deserved
and then some. I wouldn’t be surprised if he doesn’t sue ya though.
You got a good lawyer?” Lincoln chuckles and Gage joins in.

“Yes, I’m sure I can come up with something.
How bad is he?”

“He’ll live, but I’m sure some serious
reconstructive surgery will be in order. His cheeks were hallowed
when I saw him, his eyes are black and blue and the paramedics
couldn’t wake him. My guess is he’s got a serious concussion. Must
not of punched him in the mouth, I see he’s got all his teeth.”

“I learned my lesson long ago, don’t punch in
the mouth. You’ll get your knuckles busted all to hell. It’s not
worth it.”

And here I thought he was just letting loose
on him. Apparently, I was wrong. Gage hit him just where he
intended to, with complete control. That’s scary and kind of sexy,
even though it shouldn’t be.

“Lex?” Lincoln is speaking to me.

“Yeah?”

“You alright here with Gage? Or do you want
me to take you home? I…”

Gage cuts him off. “I’ll take her home. I’m
sober. Only had a single glass of wine.”

“Is that alright, sweetheart?” Lincoln
questions.

My heart blooms at his sweetness. Lincoln is
the kindest man and the best police officer. He needs a wife to
share all that love with. Maybe I can find him a girlfriend.

Nodding into Gage’s chest, I answer. “Yes, he
or Roni can take me home.”

“I heard my name.” I feel Roni’s hand softly
land on my shoulder, supportively patting it a few times. “What’s
up, Linc?”

“Not much, Roni, hear you kicked some ass
tonight. I’m going to make my report and make sure I get Corey’s
statement. I’ll need you three to write one up for me. But I won’t
keep ya. Lex needs to get home. Make sure you tuck her in tight for
me. I’ll drop by tomorrow to check on her.” Lincoln rattles off to
Roni and Gage.

“And Lex, you’ve got my number if you need
anything. I’m working all night. But I don’t care if it’s ten in
the morning and I’m sleeping, I’ll wake up and come over so we can
eat ice-cream and watch a movie.”

Awe! I need to give him a hug.

Releasing my arms from around Gage, I try to
pull away but he won’t let me go.

“I want to hug him.” I whisper, gazing up
into his majestic blue green eyes.

Cupping my cheeks in his hands, Gage holds
eye contact and my heart reaches out to him. Even now, all dirty,
he’s sexier than any man I’ve ever imagined.

“Okay,” he nods, closes his eyes and leans
forward, sweetly kissing my forehead.

My heart physically aches walking away from
Gage and into Lincoln’s outstretched arms. I melt into and he too
kisses the top of my head. It must be a hot guy thing. Except he
couldn’t kiss my forehead as easily, Lincoln stands about three to
four inches taller than Gage and my head hits him mid chest. He’s a
massive man.

“Love you Lex, call or text me tomorrow. Let
me know how you are. I’ll stop by on my way to shift about nine
tomorrow night.” Kissing me one more time, he lets me go and leaves
to go do his job, and Gage doesn’t wait another second to have me
back into his protective arms, where I strangely feel like I
belong, even though I shouldn’t. I know I should probably force
myself to stop liking it this much. But I can’t. It feels too good,
too comforting, too perfect to let go of. I can go back to
disliking him tomorrow. Tonight I’m going to relish in this
comforting connection.

“You’re sure you’re okay?” Roni asks standing
in the doorway of my bedroom. Concern etched in the lines of her
face.

“I’m fine. I promise. Nothing actually
happened. He didn’t feel lady, so it’s alright.”

I’m being honest with her. After spending
another hour at the bar with Gage, Roni and Bob, I feel much
better. Gage insisted on driving me home. But I insisted right back
that he’d already done more than enough. Which left Roni to drive
me home in my car; she rode with Bob tonight, so it worked out
perfectly.

“Are you sure you don’t want to talk about
lady
? We haven’t talked about how you feel about her in a
long time.”

Roni is being too nice. I need my bitchy best
friend back. I don’t like people feeling sorry for me or trying to
hold my hand. I don’t want to be babied. I want to go to sleep.

“
Lady
is fine. I like her just fine
and she serves a purpose. I still want to keep her.”

“Good. Now go to sleep.”

She smiles, winks, and shuts my door. Rolling
onto my side, I click off my night lamp. Tonight has been quite the
evening. I’m exhausted and ready to sleep away all of tonight’s
drama.

Chapter Eleven

As I am sure, you have gathered through the
course of the night, I have an extra appendage. Now, before you go
writing me off and thinking I’m some sicko freakazoid. Hear me
out.

Here’s my story on how I became the woman I
am today.

My past, as far back that I can remember, my
life was always filled with pain. Emotional pain, laced with
moments of excruciating punishment. Punishment rendered firstly by
my father for not being the son he always wanted. I was the monster
or a ‘thing’ in his eyes, or that’s what he told me on many
occasions, all because I’m different. I was born with the wrong sex
between my legs. And once my mother and I were finally able to rid
ourselves from the destruction my father reaped, we moved to
Heartfair to start our new lives. Then at twenty-one, I met my
first long-term boyfriend. The man I lost my virginity to, but once
again I was betrayed. Our love and my trust was obliterated within
the first six months of us being together. The love we felt quickly
fell apart and was replaced with hatred and through that hate;
abuse was the front-runner in my life for eight very long agonizing
months, until I was finally saved. We’ve already talked about
Brian. And that’s only half of my story.

When I was a child, I felt different. I
couldn’t pinpoint what exactly. I just didn’t feel like a boy. I
never liked boy things. Even though I wore boy clothes, had a boy
haircut and was even forced to pee like a man; standing up.
Although when my father wasn’t home, I always sat down. It felt
more natural to me.

I can vividly remember this moment like it
was yesterday. I was four and my mom took me grocery shopping with
her. Which we did everything together. I’ve always been close with
her. I had on a pair of blue bibs—or that’s what we called them.
You might know them better as overalls. And that spring day at the
store because I had been such a good boy helping my mom with her
shopping—by putting things in her cart that was on our list and
always listening to her instructions. My mom surprised me by taking
me to the toy department to pick out something special, just for
me.

Being an only child with no close cousins or
friends, I had never seen a baby doll or a Barbie up close. They
were always on TV but I was not allowed to watch it much. So I was
ecstatic to be able to touch and see them in their plastic boxes,
lining the store aisles. Padding my tiny light up tennis shoe clad
feet, up and down the aisle I looked at every single toy, until I
found
her
. The most perfect doll. She was a Barbie with long
blonde hair and a frilly pink dress that fell off her shoulders. It
was love at first sight. And when I carried my precious cargo over
to my mom, she was slightly puzzled by my choice.

“Lex, are you sure you don’t want a He-man
action figure? Or a G.I Joe, instead?” she asked with a sweet smile
on her face.

Shaking my head and batting my long lashes,
she gave in. I was dead set on that doll. And being the sweet mom
she is, I was allowed to have my very first pretty pink Barbie. I
was beyond proud and thrilled to call her mine.

When we got home to our small single story
house in a tiny town resting in the middle of Connecticut, I raced
into the house for the scissors so my mom could open my Barbie for
me. She did, even before putting away the bags of groceries.

I played and cherished that Barbie in my blue
walled bedroom where I talked with her and introduced her to my
stuffed animals and the hot wheels that I had meticulously lined up
on my brown dresser for display. I never played with them. I didn’t
like them that way.

When my Dad came home that night from work,
he was a police officer and always worked long hours. So I didn’t
see him as much as my mom, who stayed at home with me full
time.

Running from my room down the hall with my
Barbie in my grasp, I was so excited to show my dad. Stopping in
front of his recliner as he knelt down unlacing his boots and
sitting them next to his chair one at a time, he looked up at up at
me with tired eyes, a forced smile, and he said, “Hey there,
Lex.”

“Dad, look what I got today!” I screeched so
excited I could have jumped out of my skin if it hadn’t been
attached.

As soon as my father’s eyes latched onto the
doll that I was jiggling in my tiny hands he snatched it away. At
first, I thought it was so he could get a better look at her. To
admire how pretty her fluffy pink dress was.

Boy, oh boy, was I wrong.

“You wanted a fucking bitch doll?!” he
seethed, red faced, jaw locked, his knuckles that were wrapped
around my Barbie had turned pure white.

I didn’t respond.

“Lex, you don’t want to pee standing up and
you like your mother’s lipstick and perfume. Now, you want a stupid
doll!?” By this time, he was screaming right in my little
four-year-old face. I could smell cigarette stench on his breath. I
was already shaking and bawling so hard I couldn’t have spoken a
single coherent word if I wanted to. I sniffled and sucked in the
snot that wanted to run, and kept wiping my eyes repeatedly, to
clear away the waterfall of salty tears.

“Lex, dolls are for girls! And no
son
of mine will be playing with bitch dolls!”

That was the very first day of many days to
come that my earth shattered around me. First came Barbie’s head.
He tore off her body and chucked it angrily across the room, with a
manly roar.

“No fucking dolls, Lex.” He screamed again,
yanking off both of her arms at the same time. Those he tossed into
the trashcan next to his chair. I can’t remember much of what he
screamed after that, because I was so devastated with a shattered
heart, I couldn’t think straight. The one and only toy I had loved
was being destroyed in front of my very eyes. The same day I had
brought her home to live with us.