Learning To Love (The Griffin Brothers Book 4) (28 page)

“Well, I have keys to
one of the Griffin corporate apartments, so I have a place to stay.”

No. Just no. She needs
to move back in here. Not one of my family’s apartments.

“Oh. Did you take
your stuff there?”

Does Rose know I’m
listening or is she just asking? Either way, I’m holding my breath
as I wait for the answer.

“No. I wanted to come
see you first. Something smells good, by the way.”

YES!

“Oh yeah. Maggie sent
some mac and cheese for Luke and me. Luke grilled burgers, too.”

“I thought you said
he wasn’t here. Why did he grill?”

“He’s having some
later. I told him a friend was coming over, so he made extra.”

“Oh.”

I can’t tell if she
sounds sad or relieved. I get my answer from Rose.

“Did you want him to
be here? You look a little sad that he’s not.”

“Honestly, I want to
see him more than I want to take my next breath. I know he hates me,
and he’s moved on, but I just want to look at him one more time.”

“One more time? What
do you mean by that? You’re scaring me.”

She’s also scaring
me,
and I’m down
the stairs before I even realize that I’ve moved.

“I need that answer,
too.”

“Luke.” She turns
to her sister. “You said he wasn’t here.”

“He wants to talk to
you. He was supposed to stay upstairs until I thought you were
ready.” Rose is glaring at me, now, but I don’t care.

“I couldn’t stay up
there after what she just said. I mean, you’re not going to
do…something, are you?”

“You mean like kill
myself?” She looks at both of us, her eyes going wide. “Is that
what you both thought? I’m pathetic, but I’m not that far gone.”

“What did you mean
then?”

“You said you were
done and never wanted to see me again. I figured you’d have divorce
papers for me the next time I saw you and that would be it.”

“I was hurt and
angry. I haven’t filed for divorce, and I’m not going to unless
that’s what you want.” I realize I didn’t address part of what
she said a minute ago, so I try to make her smile. “Oh, and please
don’t refer to my wife as pathetic.”

I get that smile I
want. “You don’t want a divorce? Really?”

“Really. I don’t.”

“I hate to interrupt,
but Alex should be here any minute so I need to grab my bag.”

“Alex is coming? And
you’re going? What about dinner?”

“I texted her so you
guys could be alone. You need to talk more than we need dinner, Liv.
We can have dinner tomorrow.”

“Not tomorrow. We
have that dinner with your parents.”

“Oh yeah. I’d
blocked that out of my mind.”

“You’re both having
dinner with my parents?”

“And my parents, and
I think Blaine’s parents. My mom wanted to try and mend the
relationships a little.”

“Oh.”

“We haven’t
forgotten you, Liv. Maggie just thought they should start with me.
Blaine’s mom and she have been talking, so they did this together.
You know I won’t just go back without them apologizing to you.”

“That’s great,
Rose. Even if they don’t apologize to me, you should try to work
things out.”

“No. It’s all or
nothing and that includes Luke, too.”

“They know that with
me, Luke is not an option.”

I think that means she
chose me and my heart starts piecing itself back together. I
was
willing to work things out anyway. I love her, and that’s the most
important thing. Knowing I came first is pretty awesome. If that’s
true. I’ll be asking her later.

Alex comes by and gets
Rose, and then things get a little awkward. I try to break the ice.
“Are you hungry?”

“Umm, not really. I
just had a big lunch.”

“Do you want to talk
first?”

“Okay.”

I walk over and sit on
the couch. She looks around and decides to sit on one of the chairs.
“You don’t want to sit next to me?”

“I-I can’t.”

“Why not?” Before
she can answer, a horrifying thought crosses my mind. “Are you
afraid of me?”

“Of course not! I
know you’d never hurt me physically.”

“But you’re not
coming over here, are you?”

“I feel more
comfortable over here right now.”

“Alright.”

For now at least.
Either she’s going to come over to this couch soon, or I’m
joining her on that chair. I’m fine with either option. I haven’t
touched my wife in weeks. That’s not okay, and I want to put an end
to the drought.

“What do you want to
talk about first?”

“Your parents.”

“Oh. That’s easy.
Sure.”

“Easy? Really?” I
don’t mean to sound angry, but it comes out because, well, I
am
a little pissed that she thinks the major thing that broke us up is
easy to explain.

“Yeah, really. But
you know what, I can tell you’re still pissed at me, and I don’t
think you want to hear the truth, so let’s just forget this. I
understand that I fucked up a lot, but I didn’t in the end. That
should count for something.”

She gets up and starts
for the door. I beat her there and stand in front of it. She won’t
look at me, and I can see her that her jaw is clenched. We both just
stand there for a few minutes, not speaking or moving. Finally, she
turns and returns to the chair.

“Where were we?”

“Apparently with you
keeping me prisoner in this house until I say what you want, beg for
forgiveness, give you a good blow job, or something else that meets
your approval. What’s the cost of my freedom, huh, Luke?”

I reel back and am
about to argue, but I realize that I did just stop her from leaving.
“You’re not a prisoner. I shouldn’t have blocked you from
leaving. I just didn’t want you to go. But you’re free. Totally
free. I’m sorry.”

She looks at me, and I
can still see the anger in her eyes as she speaks. “When I left the
party with my parents, I
did
need to talk to them. Alone. I didn’t want a whole party to hear me
cutting ties with them. Because that’s what I did. I told them that
I loved you and wasn’t divorcing you. I even said you were like
some fairytale prince who loved and cherished me.” She shakes her
head, like she can’t believe she described me that way, and my
heart hurts at the thought of just how much I’ve disappointed her.
“Then I walked out of their house and drove here to tell you that
I’d done what I always knew I’d do if it came to it. I chose you
over them. And well, you know how well that worked out for me.”

Shit. I
do
know. I refused to talk to her and packed up her car with
her things, telling her I wanted a divorce. “God, I’m so sorry. I
should’ve let you talk.”

“Yeah, you should
have. I understand why you thought the worst. I hid you from everyone
when I should have been bragging about how wonderful my husband was.
I was scared and stupid, and you will never know how sorry I am for
the pain it caused you. I just wish you would’ve talked to me. Or
even yelled at me. Instead, you made me feel like nothing. Like I
meant
nothing to you
and never had.” She starts to cry and I feel even worse.

“Honey, no. You know
that’s not true. You mean everything.” I get off the couch and
kneel in front of her chair. I can’t not touch her. I wipe the
tears from her cheeks as she looks me in the eye.

“Still?”

“Always, Ollie.
Always.”

“You called me
Ollie.”

I nod and am a little
freaked out when she starts crying harder. “Is that bad? I’ll
call you Olivia. Don’t cry.”

“Don’t you dare
call me Olivia,” she says as she punches me in the arm. “These
are happy tears. I never thought you’d call me that again.”

“Oh. Well, cry away
then. Happily.” We both laugh until I see her wince. “What’s
wrong? Are you in pain?”

“Just a little sore.
Sleeping in my back seat wasn’t exactly comfortable. The shower
earlier helped.”

“Do you want to take
a bath and soak your muscles?”

“That would be
amazing. First, though, I need you to stop looking guilty. You’re
not responsible for me sleeping in my car. I had options that I was
too stubborn to take.”

“I’m going to feel
guilty for kicking you out for the rest of my life. That’s just the
way it is. I can’t even begin to tell you how happy I am that
you’re back, though.” I kiss her forehead because I have to, and
then lift her into my arms and carry her upstairs.

* * *

Olivia

I can’t believe I’m
in Luke’s arms. I was so worried that I would never have him hold
me again. He carries me into the bathroom and sets me on the counter.
Then he starts my bath, putting in some of his shower gel to make
bubbles since my stuff isn’t here anymore. He catches me smiling.

“Sorry. It’s all I
have.”

“I’ll get to smell
like you. I’m not complaining.”

“Do you need help
getting out of your clothes?”

The smile freezes on my
lips and I quickly shake my head. There’s no way I can let Luke see
me naked. I’ve lost at least twenty pounds and I know I look bad,
with my bones sticking out in places. That’s
really
sexy. I mean, it is for people who are normally super thin, but not
on me.

“I can undress
myself.”

He looks a little hurt
but smiles at me. “Okay. I’ll leave you to it then. Just yell if
you need anything. I’ll be in my office.”

“Thanks.”

I wait for him to leave
and close the door. Then I undress, making sure to not look in the
mirror. I don’t want to see myself. It’s bad enough knowing how I
must look, without the actual proof of it. I turn off the water and
slide into the large tub. It feels so good and my muscles start
loosening almost immediately.

I don’t realize that
I’ve fallen asleep until I feel myself being lifted from the water.
I try to struggle a little. “Shh, Ollie. Go back to sleep. I’ve
got you.”

“No. You can’t see
me,” I whisper as I come awake.

“I’ve seen you lots
of times. You know that.”

“Not like this, when
I look like this.”

“You look beautiful.
I’m going to dry you off and put you to bed, so please stop
struggling. I don’t want to drop you.”

I stop struggling but
don’t look at him as he stands me on my feet next to the bed. He
dries me off and then pulls back the comforter and sheets. I cover
myself as best as I can with my arms as I try not to cry. I climb
under the comforter and pull it to my chin as soon as he steps aside.

“Thanks, Luke.”

Instead of leaving, he
sits on the bed and faces me. I need him to go. I can’t hold back
the tears much longer. I try to look away, but he reaches out and
cups my cheek. “You. Look. Beautiful.”

“I know that’s not
true. You don’t have to try and make me feel better.”

“It
is
true.”

“Then why haven’t
you…never mind. I know why.”

“Talk to me.”

He’s not going to let
it go. I know it, so I look him in the eye and tell him why my heart
is still broken, even after he’s been so nice to me. “You haven’t
tried to kiss me. I know you have a new girlfriend, but I
thought…maybe…I mean, I know I’m not sexy…I just…I should
go. I have the keys to the apartment. I’ll go.” I pull my face
away and curl onto my side, waiting for him to leave so I can get up.

He rolls me back over
so that he can look at me when he speaks. “If you want to leave, I
won’t stop you. I’ve told you that already. But let’s get a few
things straight. You need to stop the bullshit talk about not being
sexy. That’s just what it is. Bullshit. I’m hard as a fucking
rock at the moment. I’ve been hard since I heard your voice when
you came in the house earlier. You’ve lost some weight and yeah,
you need to eat something other than ramen, but you’re still the
sexiest fucking woman I know. Because you’re you. That was my
co-worker you heard in the house earlier. My
married
co-worker, who I wanted to introduce to you at our party.

“I don’t have a
girlfriend. I have a
wife.
I’m trying to be respectful of you since we’re still working
things out. Honestly, though, I want to climb on top of you and bury
my cock in your pussy until neither of us can walk for a week. I’ve
missed you so much. I
love
you so much. I know I’ve made you doubt it. You’re not the only
one who’s fucked things up. But we’re here now, and I’m going
to do everything in my power to make this work. I can’t let go of
you again. I just can’t.”

His eyes are watery
now, and I know that he means everything he just told me. He’s not
faking anything. He couldn’t—that’s just not him. He’s the
guy who’s always going to tell it to you straight. Well, unless his
wife asks him not to. That he did that for me, kept our secret when
it had to have been killing him, gets to me more than what he’s
saying now.

He loves me. I know it.
I’ve always known it. I thought that what I’d done and not done
had been bigger than that love. I thought it had killed it. But, it
didn’t. His love stayed strong enough to face my demons
and
his.

“You’re smiling.”
So he is, too.

“Yeah. I was just
thinking about how you really are a fairytale prince come to life.”

“Not yet.” He leans
towards me. “I haven’t kissed the girl and woken her from her
nightmare yet.”

“The girl would love
a kiss.”

“So would the
prince.”

He cups my face and
kisses me softly. Just a sweet little kiss. That quickly turns into
something more passionate as we pour our love into it. I don’t even
care that the comforter has fallen as I try to climb onto his lap. I
need to be closer. I need more of him.
All
of him.