Knock, knock... (33 page)

Right.

Lightness. Love. Always the answer to the darkness. The negativity and the blackness that surrounded anyone. And everyone. She knew that. Somehow. And if she knew that much...

She closed her eyes, searching for the light. There was so much emptiness inside. But that couldn't be right. She wasn't empty. She was full of life and love and laughter. Sure, there would be pain inside, but she lived in the world of joy. Only she couldn't remember what she did for a living. If she did anything. She knew that she did something that helped others. Somehow.

Money. That's right. She helped others with money. The Foundation!

The darkness retreated a little more again.

And with memories of the Foundation came Bernice. Pappy. Roman. She smiled and her life came back in focus.

Memories flooded back. The blackness dissipated instantly.

Color surged at her from all areas. Noises filled her brain. Her thoughts, other people's thoughts. So much hit her all at once, she was on overload.

Easy.
Stefan's voice surged through her, an anchor she could hold on to in the sea of sensation that tossed her from side to side.
Glad to have you back
.

She watched as the waves washed around her, pushing up against her legs and splashing high on her body. As with all waves, the onslaught eased, slipping back to rock gently in place and to allow her to settle into her old comfortable self.

Peace. The word meant everything to her.

Good. Now is it possible to wake up, please? Roman is beyond worried, and we're going to attract attention soon.

She studied him.
I don't understand
.

I know. That's why you need to wake up. You weren't just a victim inside. Your body was attacked as well.

She blinked. She spun around and then looked down at her body. She wasn't in her body?
Say what?

Stefan spoke again
. You're almost there. Just not back enough. You need to come all the way home.
He sighed, reached out a hand, and squeezed her shoulder.
You're caught in your own mind. But you need to come back into your body.

She looked down at her toes. She lifted a questioning look in his direction and raised an eyebrow. She pointed to her toes and wiggled them. "I'm in my body."

He snickered.

Both her eyebrows shot up.

He grinned and shook his head. His hand squeezed hers again, and then, as she watched him, he placed the palm of his hand on the center of her forehead. He gazed deep into her eyes and whispered,
Go home
.

She felt a shot of heat go through her forehead and down her back, circling at the base of her spine. As if she had an elastic band connecting her to something else, the elastic sprang back and pulled her through a tunnel of darkness.

There was an odd tension, as if she were connected to something else. Something she didn't understand, but it was important.

Her head snapped back, and she smacked into awareness.

She opened her eyes and groaned.

"Shay?"

She blinked and tried to turn her head. A sledgehammer pounded on the inside of her skull.

She groaned again.

"Easy. Don't try to move just yet."

She blinked, heard the voice, and recognized it, but the words didn't quite register. She pushed herself up on her forearms. And then lifted her head. Tree boughs brushed the top of her head. She tried to push up more, only to realize someone, probably Roman, had grabbed her by the arms and was lifting her free of the tree.

Hitting the vertical so fast was tough on her head. Another groan slipped free.

Roman tucked her in close to his chest and held her tight.

She slowly became aware that he was saying something over and over again. "Thank you, God. Thank you."

She must have scared him pretty well. Then again, she'd scared herself too.

Feeling stronger, her head no longer sounding the alarm of imminent destruction, she pulled back a little and said, "Let's go home."

He tugged her in closer, hugged her tight, and then released her. "If you're sure you're okay. Otherwise it's to the hospital for you."

"No hospital," she murmured. "I just need rest."

"Then you can rest at home, where I can keep an eye on you, while you explain just what the hell you were doing taking off on me like that."

She'd have laughed if she could have. But in truth, she was too damn glad to be back in his arms to be worried. She deserved to get chewed out by him. How could she explain that she thought she'd recognized the killer's energy, and that given a chance to track down the person, she'd taken it.

Had she seen who the energy was attached to?
No.

And that confused her even more.

Had she been given a trail of bread crumbs to lead her into a trap? A trap she'd fallen into without a second thought. She'd been so focused on the killer, she'd even left Roman behind.

She shook her head as she realized how far from the car she'd gone. It so didn't make any sense. Why would someone try to lure her into a trap?

And why knock her out when she arrived?

Why hadn’t they killed her?

***

Roman was silent as he drove the car through the traffic. He gripped the steering wheel so tightly his fingers turned white. Every turn was sharp, every braking movement hard. Shay studied his profile and watched the muscle pulse on his jaw line.

She had some explaining to do.

And she had only five minutes left in the car to come up with a plausible story. Every time she reached for an explanation, her reasoning dissolved under scrutiny. She didn't know what to tell him. Had she run after that energy of her own volition?

Yes.
At least she thought so.

She'd hadn't been following a person but, rather, an energy trail.

That's the thing – she'd been alone. So who had attacked her? Had someone lain in wait for her? Directed her there? Or did someone have the ability to knock her out from a distance by psychic means?

Not nice if they had.

And if so, from how far away could they do this? She'd checked out the area before they'd left the park, but the energy had already been overlaid and dissipated with many other energy trails. She needed to go back to her memory and take another look around as she ran through the trees and away from Roman.

She straightened. It wasn't much, but it was a plan.

And she might learn something she could use to redirect Roman away from chewing her out.

Roman pulled into the parking lot, turned off the engine, and then turned to look at her. "Home."

"Good. I have something I need to do. There's a trick I can try, to figure out who attacked me."

His gaze narrowed, locking on her face. "What kind of trick?"

With a wave of her hand to the surrounding area, she said, "I can't really explain it but I need privacy and preferably peace and quiet to do this."

"Then we'd better get at it." He exited the vehicle and came around to her side to help her out. "Although you shouldn't be doing too much of anything right now."

"And being attacked is why I have to do this." She gave him a wry smile. "I don't want to give this person another chance."

He kept a supportive arm around her shoulders as they entered the lobby. She smiled at Thomas, her doorman. "Long day, and it's not even noon yet."

He smiled as he stepped to the elevator and pushed the button. "Some days are like that."

At her apartment, Roman opened the door wide, and waited for her to enter. She took two steps in and stopped. Shifting her vision, she searched the air, looking for any signs of an intruder. It appeared normal.

She took another few steps inside and collapsed on her couch.

"Everything good?"

"Yes." She sighed. "I'm fine, but could use some caffeine."

She closed her eyes and let herself relax. Her mind wandered over the mess of the last few days.

Had someone been tracking her? How would they know about the funerals? About the deaths? Perhaps they were involved. Yet, if they'd been involved, how had they known to target those people?

Her files. All that information was in her files.

But who had access? Jordan, Rose of course, and herself. Anyone who had a key to her office. Who else? The board members, maybe. But that was her brother and Pappy. They'd all approved the initial projects. And none of them took more than a passing interest in them.

And anyone who could hack into her files.
But Roman had checked and said that there hadn't been any unusual access to system.

Then again, she'd attended the last two funerals; it would be expected that she'd attend the third as well. In fact, the killer had probably planned for her to be there.

Given what happened so far today, she needed to update Ronin. But if she could find out anything more solid, something that might help him put a stop to this, she needed to find it quickly.

"Caffeine?"

Startled, she looked over to see a cup of something hot being placed on the coffee table. She smiled. Before she could thank him, he bent down and kissed her hard. Heat spread through her, igniting flames she'd thought slaked. Her toes curled as she sighed against his breath. "Nice."

"Just a reminder that you're no longer alone."

Warmth filled her heart. "Thanks. I'd forgotten."

His beautiful warm eyes smiled down on her. "Don't forget again."

He lowered his head once more, warming up the hidden spots deep inside Shay. A curious sense of connection filled her heart. It felt wonderful. Comforting. Blissful. To share her good days and her bad days. And boy, did today count as one of the worst.

"I was thinking I needed to phone your brother and give him an update," said Shay.

"That's the most sensible thing you've said today. Except I called him while I waited for you to wake up." He sat down beside her and tugged her onto his lap. "Now, what were you talking about in the car?"

She snuggled close and explained her technique.

"Absolutely amazing," he murmured. "To think something like that is even possible."

"Hmm. There is so much that goes on below the surface." She sighed. "You have no idea the things I've seen. What Stefan has seen."

"It has to be difficult to know so much about everyone. To see their secrets. To know information you'd probably rather not know." He looked slightly uncomfortable.

"Absolutely. Which is why I try to block so much. It makes it easier on me." Not wanting to hold back anymore, she added, "Which is why it's important we don’t have any secrets between us." She turned to look up at him. "I can find them out. I'd rather be told, up front."

He stared down at her, something immobile in his gaze. "A warning?" he asked lightly, but something had shifted in his tone. But then, to find out he couldn't hide a secret from her had to be disconcerting. At the same time, it was damn near impossible for her to not wonder about the secret he kept to himself.

She'd like to say, fine, she didn't really want to know. But she also knew it would be impossible for her to love, on that level, if she didn't have an open and completely trusting relationship. She might never know if Roman had the ability to hide his true self like Darren had, but she couldn't imagine he would. His artwork was too passionate. To open. He gave it his all.

And then she realized it must be his artwork, his model, that he wanted to keep close to his heart.

And she could understand that. Not that she liked it, but she didn't exactly want to share her past about Darren either. So, good enough. Time to change the subject. Hopefully, when Roman was more comfortable, he'd share what he could. And that had to be enough.

At least for now.

"No, not a warning. Just letting you know some things can't be changed. I wouldn't go looking for answers." Still, she might under certain circumstances, and so she added, "Unless it was a life or death circumstance."

She grimaced at the memory. How many times had psychics been forced to cross that line and go deeper into their partner's psyche for just that reason?

"Well, I hope there'll be no life and death circumstances in our relationship." His gaze narrowed and he added slowly, "However, after today that thought is a little unnerving."

"Are you saying you'd like to back off?" Shay withdrew slightly to see his face more clearly.

He snatched her back into his arms. "No," he said forcefully. "That is not what I'm saying. I'm acknowledging that sometimes things are beyond our control."