[Kentucky Brothers 01] - The Journey (46 page)

He’d just started sanding the hope chest when he heard a car pull into the yard. It didn’t sound like Allen’s truck, so he figured it must be one of his English neighbors.

He set the sandpaper aside and headed for the barn door. When he stepped outside, he was surprised to see a taxi parked in his driveway.

When the back door of the cab opened, and a young woman with shiny auburn hair hanging down her back, stepped out, Titus froze. It was Phoebe Stoltzfus! He’d have recognized her anywhere, even without her Amish clothes. The question was, why had she come?

P
hoebe, wh-what are you doing here?” Titus stammered as a trickle of sweat rolled down his forehead. He couldn’t believe she was standing in front of him. It felt like he was in the middle of a dream.

Phoebe gave him a dimpled smile—the same smile that used to make his heart feel like melting butter. “I came to see you,” she said ever so sweetly.

“How’d you know where I live?”

She tipped her head slightly and snickered. “Your address was on the letter you sent me.”

“Oh, that’s right.” Titus felt like a gibbering idiot. Having Phoebe show up out of the blue had taken him completely by surprise.

“Things didn’t work out for me in California, so after I got your letter, I decided to catch a bus and come here to see you.”

He shifted from one foot to the other, as his heart began to pound. Seeing Phoebe again had stirred up emotions he thought he’d managed to bury. “I … uh … guess you’ll be heading to Pennsylvania from here?”

“Why would I go there?”

“To see your folks, of course.”

She shook her head. “I came to be with you. I want us to start over again.”

Titus swallowed hard. “Phoebe, I—”

“So this is your place?” She motioned to the manufactured home behind them.

He nodded, not trusting his voice. The longer she stood there smiling at him, the harder it was to think or even breathe.

“It looks nice. Can I see the inside?”

“I guess so.” Titus didn’t know what else to do—especially since her taxi had already gone.

When they entered the house, he gave her a quick tour, the whole time feeling as if he were dreaming and unable to wake up. When he’d sent her that letter, he’d never imagined she would come here to see him.

“This is perfect,” Phoebe said. “There’s lots of space, and even a guest room where I can stay.”

He shook his head hard, as reality set in. “Huh-uh. No way! You can’t stay here.”

“Why not?”

“It wouldn’t be right, and you know it, Phoebe.”

“But I have no place else to go.”

“I’ll call my driver and have him take you to a hotel in Hopkinsville.”

She frowned, causing tiny wrinkles to form across her forehead. “I can’t stay at a hotel, Titus.”

“Why not?”

“I have no money for that. I had to borrow money from a friend to pay for my bus ticket here, and I used what I had left to pay for the cab.”

Titus didn’t know what to do. He felt sorry for Phoebe, just like he had when she was a teenager and used to complain that her dad was too strict. After thinking things over a few minutes, he finally said, “Guess I could take you over to the Beilers’ place and see if you can stay with them tonight.”

“Who are the Beilers?”

“They’re part of my church district, and they own a general store in the area. They only have one daughter still living at home, so I’m sure they must have an extra room.”

Phoebe’s lower lip protruded in a pout, the way it often had when they’d been courting and she hadn’t gotten her way. “Are you sure I can’t stay here with you?”

“Of course I’m sure, and I’m surprised you’d even ask.”

Her face colored to a deep pink, and she quickly averted his gaze. “You’re right, Titus. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

Titus picked up her suitcase and opened the door. “I’ll get my horse and buggy ready, and then we can head over to the Beilers’ and see if they’d mind putting you up for the night.”

“Do we need to go there right now? We have a lot of catching up to do, so can’t we sit here and visit awhile?”

“We can talk on the way over there.” Titus hurried out the door, eager to get away from Phoebe so he could think. Being in her presence made him feel befuddled and disoriented, like he’d lost his ability to think or see things clearly.

When he entered the barn to get Lightning, he glanced at the hope chest and winced. What would Suzanne say when she found out that Phoebe was here? How would this turn of events affect his and Suzanne’s relationship?

“It feels strange to be riding in a buggy again,” Phoebe said as she slid a little closer to Titus on the seat.

“I guess it would. What’s it been now … nine months since you left for California?”

“I went there the first part of March, so it’s been eight months.”

He glanced at her, and his gaze came to rest on her faded blue jeans. “I guess you threw away all your Amish clothes, huh?”

She nodded and released a lingering sigh. “I wish I still had them now.”

He offered no reply.

“Things were great when Darlene and I first got to California. We shared an apartment and both had jobs. Then all of a sudden she decided to move back home, which left me in the lurch.”

“How so?”

“The rent on the apartment was too much for me to pay with the money I earned at the ice-cream store where I worked during the day. So I had to get an evening job working at a convenience store.” Phoebe grimaced. “Even with two jobs, it was a struggle for me to pay the rent, utilities, cell phone, and also buy food. I paid the fee to end the cell phone agreement, cut way back on groceries, and starting riding an old bike so I wouldn’t have to scrape money together for bus fare.” She glanced over at Titus to gauge his reaction, but he kept his focus straight ahead and said nothing.

“One day I was late getting to work at the ice-cream store,” she continued. “My boss was really upset and fired me.”

Still no response from Titus. Was he even listening to what she was saying, or didn’t he care?

She reached over and placed her hand on his knee. “Did you hear what I said?”

“Jah. Just thinking is all, and you’re makin’ it hard, so please take your hand off my knee.”

Her chin trembled as she pulled her hand aside. Titus seemed so distant, as though he wished she hadn’t come. “You can’t imagine how hard it’s been for me,” she said, struggling not to give in to her tears. “With only one job, I couldn’t make ends meet, and the way things were going, I would have been kicked out of my apartment soon and ended up on the street, begging for money and food.”

“Sorry to hear you’ve been through so much. With things being so bad, I’m surprised you didn’t return home.”

She shook her head and swallowed against the lump clogging her throat. “I told you before. I can’t go back there. Mom would say, ‘I told you so,’ and Dad would lay down a bunch of rules.”

He turned his head and looked at her with a grim expression. “So you came here because you were out of money and had no place else to go?”

She placed her hand cautiously on his arm, hoping he wouldn’t ask her to move it, and was relieved when he didn’t. “That’s not how it was, Titus. When I got your letter, it made me miss what we used to have. I realized that I still cared for you, so I came here, hoping you’d take me back.”

No response. Just a blank look on Titus’s face. Did he believe her? Did he still have feelings for her? Surely he couldn’t have forgotten what they’d once shared.

“I’d like to stay in Kentucky and see about joining the church,” she said.

“That’s … uh … not a good idea.” “How come?”

“It’s different here, and there’d be a lot of adjustments for you to make.”

“I’m good at adapting. I did plenty of that while I was in California.” Phoebe leaned close to his ear. “I know I’ll have to prove myself, and I hope you’ll give me a chance.”

He glanced at her, and then looked quickly away. “It’s not that simple, Phoebe. You see, I have a—”

she squeezed his arm tenderly. “Remember how much fun we used to have when we were courting?”

“Jah, but—”

“Remember how you always said you’d never love anyone but me?”

“I did say that, but now I’m—”

“Please don’t send me away,” she pleaded. “I just can’t go home, and I really want to be here with you.”

When Titus gave no reply, a sense of desperation welled in Phoebe’s soul. Didn’t he want her anymore?

A few minutes later, Titus guided his horse and buggy off the road and turned up a driveway. “This is the Beilers’ place,” he said. “I think it’s best if you wait in the buggy while I speak to them.”

“Okay,” Phoebe said with a nod. Oh, she hoped they would let her stay.

Titus hopped down, secured his horse to the hitching rail, and sprinted for the house.

Phoebe leaned back in the seat and drew in a deep breath to help calm her nerves. She knew she’d taken Titus by surprise, showing up the way she had, and even though he was obviously confused right now, she felt sure that after they spent some time together, everything would work out. She’d make sure it did.

A
s Titus lay in bed that night, staring into the darkness, he replayed the events of the evening. He’d explained Phoebe’s appearance to the Beilers the best that he could, and they’d graciously agreed to let her stay with them until she figured out what she was going to do. Then he’d said good-bye to Phoebe and hurried back home, feeling the need to be alone so he could think things through.

“What I wish Phoebe would do is go home,” he mumbled. “If she stays here, it’ll wreck things between me and Suzanne, and I might even weaken and take Phoebe back.”

Titus turned onto his side and punched his pillow a couple of times, trying to find a comfortable position. Was it possible that Phoebe had been telling the truth about wanting to live in Kentucky and join the Amish church? Did she still have feelings for him, as she’d said, or was she just in need of a place to stay?

Do I still care for her?
Titus asked himself.
Could I have only thought I was falling in love with Suzanne because she looks similar to Phoebe?

If that were true, and he really didn’t love Suzanne, then he needed to know it now before he asked her to marry him.

I need wisdom in knowing what to do, Lord
, Titus silently prayed.
Things were going along fine until Phoebe showed up. I thought I had my future planned out, and I figured Suzanne would be a part of it. I’m not sure about anything right now. Please show me what I should do
.

Titus tossed and turned for another hour until he finally made a decision. Tomorrow morning, before he went to the woodshop, he’d stop at the Yoders’ house and speak to Suzanne. He didn’t want her finding out about Phoebe from Esther or anyone else in her family. He needed to tell her himself.