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Authors: Trice Hickman

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BOOK: Keeping Secrets & Telling Lies

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Chapter Two

A Road Map for Chaos ...

I
t was early evening, and Victoria had just returned from dropping off Alexandria at Susan Whitehurst's house. Susan's little girl, Claudia, was Alexandria's best friend in the neighborhood. Since the beginning of summer their sleepovers had become a regular weekend ritual that both girls looked forward to. They'd play dress up, eat their favorite snacks, and watch their favorite movies. Claudia, a freckle-faced little sweetheart, was a year older than Alexandria, and in many ways their friendship, however elementary, reminded Victoria of the bond that she and her friend Debbie shared.

Ready to relax from her long and stressful day, Victoria went downstairs to the wine cellar in search of a vintage bottle of Rivesaltes. She needed it because ever since she'd seen Parker, her nerves had been rattled like loose change. She couldn't get him out of her mind, and she hoped that a good drink would help do the trick.

Her afternoon had been wrought with anxiety. After leaving Hilda Barrett's house, she'd gone by her office to tackle the small stack of paperwork that sat on her desk and then driven across town to pick up Ted's dry cleaning. She'd carried out her duties as usual, but try as she might, she couldn't erase the image of Parker's handsome face from her mind.
Why am I thinking about him?
Victoria had asked herself.
He means nothing to me anymore. Why am I letting Parker Brightwood get to me?

But again, Victoria knew exactly why Parker had stirred the emotions that were rumbling in the pit of her stomach. He was part of a recurring dream that still haunted her sleep, appearing on nights when she least expected.

The first time had been six years ago, just a few months shy of her wedding day. In the dream, Parker had come to her doorstep in the middle of the night, begging for forgiveness and a second chance at their relationship. Despite her best efforts to resist him, they ended up in bed, making love until she awoke in a passion-induced sweat. And just as it had been when he entered her dreams that very first night, the thought of his touch left a tingling sensation on her skin, and he'd felt as warm and as real as her own flesh.

And yet another vision plagued her mind, one that was just as unsettling as her dream. She had been lying in her hospital bed the night after Alexandria was born. She had lost a tremendous amount of blood and was sedated from the drugs an IV was pumping into her system. She had awoken in the middle of the night, when a sharp pain gripped her. She opened her eyes and saw Parker as he was leaving her room. He wore a concerned but caring look on his face as he walked out into the hallway, disappearing from sight. She wasn't sure if she had imagined it or if he had really been there. But what she did know in the here and now was that she needed to stay the hell away from him!

Victoria knew she had to pull herself together. When she'd gone back to Hilda's to pick up Alexandria, she'd parked out front, rushed inside, and quickly looked around. She was thankful that Parker was nowhere in sight. She scooped up Alexandria and hightailed it back to her silver Mercedes SUV, glad she had dodged what she felt was the potential for trouble.

As Victoria stood at her kitchen counter, uncorking the bottle of wine and thinking about her day, she tried to put the messy business of Parker Brightwood out of her thoughts. She was getting a headache just thinking about the feelings that her ex-lover still stirred inside her. And if that wasn't enough to add to her growing discomfort, Alexandria had declared his son her new best friend.

“Mommy, PJ is my friend. He's really nice!” Alexandria had announced with enthusiasm on their drive back home.

“Who is PJ?” Victoria had asked, knowing who he was but still needing confirmation.

“He's my new friend.”

“Oh, and which little boy was he?” She had a thimble of hope that the PJ her daughter was referring to didn't answer to the name Parker Jr.

“The nice one!” Alexandria exclaimed.

Victoria smiled. “No, sweetie, I mean ... describe him. What color shirt was he wearing?”

“A blue one with a little thing on it right here,” Alexandria said, pointing to the upper left side of her chest.

Victoria nodded with understanding. Her daughter was so observant, noticing the smallest of details, a characteristic she had definitely gotten from her father. Ted noticed everything.

“Mommy, can I go to PJ's house and play,
please?
He has a dog named Noah, and he said I can play with him!”

“We'll see,” was all that Victoria could muster. The thought of having any involvement with Parker Brightwood gave her a shiver, the kind that ran from the top of her head down to the bottom of her feet.

“PJ is nice, and PJ is funny, and PJ knows the songs that I know, and PJ has a dog named Noah. PJ, PJ, PJ ...” That was all Victoria heard from the moment Alexandria climbed into her car seat until she dropped her off at the Whitehursts' house.

The sound of the garage door drew Victoria from her troublesome thoughts and back to the present. She reached into the cabinet for another glass and started to pour. She knew that after Ted's long day at the office, he'd probably need a relaxing drink just as much as she did.

“Hey,” she said, looking at her husband as he walked through the back door. She felt a twinge of guilt as he gave her an adoring smile. “Here.” She smiled back and handed him the glass of wine.

Ted gave her a peck on the cheek, then took a quick sip. “This is good.Thanks.” He put his glass on the counter and removed his jacket. “Let's go into the family room and relax.”

After Victoria prepared a quick plate of cheese and crackers and grabbed a handful of chocolates out of the Godiva box in the refrigerator, they settled into their familiar spots on the couch. Ted pressed the remote and threw back his head as Cassandra Wilson's smooth voice belted out a sultry tune from the stereo's surround-sound system. The soft music and low lights were soothing and just what they both needed. Victoria stretched her legs, resting her feet in Ted's lap.

“How was your day?” he asked, rubbing one of her ruby red painted toes. He wanted to start the conversation off slow.

“Um, busy. How about yours?”

“The same.” He sensed that Victoria was uncomfortable and that maybe somehow she knew he was going to bring up the conversation they'd had that morning. “Listen,V, about Jack and Jill ...”

“I know you don't want Alexandria to be a member,” she said, looking away from him.

“No, I don't butâ”

“Ted,” she interrupted, “I think it'll be a good experience for her, but if you don't want Alexandria to be involved, I will respect your decision because ...” Victoria let her words trail off. She couldn't finish her sentence, because she felt a mixture of relief and guilt about the choice she had made, a decision she had come to earlier that afternoon.

She didn't want to pass up an enriching opportunity for her daughter, but at the same time she knew there was danger ahead if she kept Alexandria in the organization. It was a danger that would impact their entire family more than a simple playdate ever could. Ted and Parker had been enemies. Their past encounters had been frosty at best, and Victoria knew she couldn't run the risk of Alexandria befriending Parker's son. That relationship would usher Parker back into their lives, and she had no doubt that it would be a road map for chaos.

Knowing that she had to nip the possible threat in the bud, Victoria continued. “We have to stand united in our decisions involving Alexandria, so if this is something that you don't want, I'll support you on it.”

Ted was slightly taken aback, not expecting Victoria to acquiesce so easily, or at all, for that matter. He knew that once she had something in her head, it usually took prayer on bended knee to persuade her otherwise. “You mean you don't mind if we pull her out of Jack and Jill? I thought this was something you wanted.” He didn't know why he was questioning her when she was basically giving him what he'd initially argued for, but what he did know was that this was very unlike his wife.

Victoria sat her wineglass on the coffee table and leaned forward for emphasis. “I want what's best for our family, and like I said, I want us to stand united in the decisions we make concerning Alexandria. We won't always agree on things, but I'm willing to bend on this one.” She looked away and swallowed hard, letting her small lie slide off her tongue and down her throat.

Ted smiled, appreciating the fact that his wife was willing to compromise and stand by him in the decision he'd made, even if he'd changed his mind. He reached for her and pulled her to his chest. “V, do you know how much I love you?”

“Yes, I do. And I love you just as much.”

Ted kissed Victoria on her forehead and stroked her hair. “Actually, I've been doing a lot of thinking, and even though I'm not one hundred percent behind the idea, I think we should keep Alexandria in Jack and Jill.”

Victoria pulled away, looking at him with surprise. This was something completely unexpected. “Why? What changed your mind?”

“Like you said, we need to stand united around the decisions we make in Alexandria's best interest, and I know this is something you feel strongly about. Besides ...” He paused, taking a deep breath. “What you said earlier ... You were right. She needs to be in an environment where she sees kids who look like her.”

Victoria didn't know what to say, and Ted could see the bewilderment on her face.

“V, I wanted to believe that things would be different for our daughter, but I know I have to face the reality that even though I see her as simply
my
child, the world will see her as a black woman, and I can't be the one who sends a message that there's anything wrong with that. Her mother is a smart, talented, beautiful black woman, and she will be, too.”

Victoria leaned into Ted's shoulder, resting her head there. She felt as though she was going to cry, but for all the wrong reasons.

Doin' the Nasty ...

It wasn't how Victoria had planned to start her workweek: frustrated and disjointed. Her calendar was jam packed with appointments and events in the days ahead. She was under pressure from duties and obligations, and she didn't have time to sit in a funk.

Monday always seemed to be her hardest day of the week. It usually took her a day or two to make the adjustment from the short-lived, hectic weekends spent with her family to the frenzied and often chaotic world of event planning. And this particular Monday was even more challenging than most, given the fact that she'd been thrown for a loop that had sent her into overdrive. Her nerves were still on edge because she couldn't get Parker out of her mind.

She was on her way to work, moving slowly from her restless night. She had been awake since 3:00 a.m., and her body was shrouded in the same fleeting feeling she'd had since Saturday. It was a feeling that was frighteningly familiar, like life was about to take an unpredictable turn.

She remembered feeling that way at the start of her relationship with Ted, and again when she first met Parker. But even with the confusion and drama that those days had brought to her life, she was almost certain that this new turn would be much more complicated. Back in those days she'd had to think only of herself, but now she had a child and a husband, and it made the stakes much higher.

Victoria walked past the neatly trimmed shrubs and abundant hostas that lined the walkway of the building leading up to her office suite. She opened the door, turned on the lights, and scanned the desk of the cubicle to her left. It was empty. She let out a small sigh of relief when she remembered that Denise would be off until Wednesday. Although she loved her office manager and very dear friend, she wasn't up to facing her today. Denise was intuitive and could read people like a book. She would be able to see that something was wrong, and she would ask questions that couldn't easily be answered.

Victoria walked down the hallway that led to her spacious office in the back, turned on the light, and dropped her large leather handbag behind her desk. Unlike most people, who dreaded going into the office, Victoria loved it. Ironically, her office had become her safe haven, providing a temporary reprieve from stress and worries.

When she was single, her home on Summerset Lane had been that retreat, and she'd basked in its comforts. But now, when she returned home after a long day, it was motherhood and wifely duties that greeted her at the door, and sometimes she needed a break. Her office suite was the one place she could go to relax and shut out the world, even if it was for just a few hours. And its serene setting, tucked away in a quiet business park that was situated in the upscale Buckhead area, served as the perfect location. The added bonus was that it was only a ten-minute drive from where she lived.

She had taken the same meticulous care in decorating her office suite that she had with her own home. She'd painted the walls a golden bronze and dressed the windows with richly textured fabrics. The recessed lighting and accent lamps cast a warm glow, helping to set the mood to welcome visitors who came to do business. She'd even converted the tiny office adjacent to hers into a small kitchen, affording her the convenience of preparing a quick meal for herself or a delicious treat for prospective clients to sample. She'd thought of everything to make the place feel like a home away from home. After all, she was in the business of making every occasion special.

Victoria sat behind her desk, uneasy about the emotions that her encounter with Parker had stirred, and at a loss for what to do about them. Then she thought about the one person who she knew could help her make sense of things. Her touchstoneâTyler Jacobs.

Tyler had been Victoria's best friend since their undergraduate days, when she was a student at Spelman College and he was at neighboring Morehouse College. Theirs was an unconventional friendship, challenging the age-old myth that a man and a woman couldn't be “just friends.” They were both only children who'd found in one another a missing sibling. Over the years they'd been each other's sounding board on everything from the people they dated to the business decisions they made, and right now she needed him.

She sat behind her desk and dialed Tyler's cell.

“What?” he answered in a huff on the second ring.

“My, aren't we cheerful this morning.”

“Don't start. It's too damn early for jokes,” Tyler said, in his Brooklyn-born accent.

“You must not have had your coffee yet.” Victoria knew that if Tyler didn't have his morning cup of joe, he could be quite the bear to deal with.

“No, I haven't, plus I'm tryin' to get around this idiot in front of me who doesn't know shit about merging,” Tyler said as he navigated his Explorer through traffic. “What's up?”

Victoria bit down on her lower lip, hearing the fatigue in her own voice. “Can you meet me for lunch?”

Tyler paused for a moment. “Not today. I have a meeting with a potential funder. But what's goin' on? You okay?”

“I had a rough weekend, and I need to talk. I really need your advice about something.”

“You at your office?”

“Yes.”

“I'm in the area. I can stop by now if you have time.”

“I'll have coffee waiting for you when you get here.”

Victoria hung up the phone and walked to the kitchen. She filled her Cuisinart brewer with Colombian blend, reached into the cabinet, and then sat two mugs on the counter.
Maybe some coffee will get me going, too.

She strolled back to her office and plopped down on the maroon-colored chenille sofa, which seemed to call her name. She closed her eyes, letting the coffee's aroma tickle her nose, glad that she'd had the foresight to outfit the room with home furnishings instead of standard office fareâthe comfort was priceless.

She knew she should be sitting behind her desk, responding to e-mails and returning phone calls, but she couldn't bring herself to move. Her body felt tired and heavy, the result of only five hours of sleep over the last two days. Normally, she was a sound sleeper and nothing stood between her and eight solid hours of peaceful slumber each and every night.Ted often teased that once her head hit the pillow, not even an earthquake could wake her. But for the past two nights she'd lain in bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking about Parker.

Victoria opened her eyes when she heard the musical chime of her front office door, signaling that a visitor was entering her suite. “Come on back. I'm in my office,” she called out to Tyler.

Tyler walked into Victoria's plush office and over to the sofa where she was reclining. “You better be glad you're in this neighborhood,” he said, shaking his head. “You're up in here, stretched across your sofa, with the door unlocked, lettin' any and everybody up in this camp. Do you know how dangerous that is? I could be a criminal or somethin'. You need to be more careful,” he warned. “Plus, you need to pull down your skirt. I can see your pink drawers,” he said, mimicking a Southern accent.

Victoria laughed as she crossed her legs and tugged at her short linen skirt, forcing it down her shapely thighs. “Tyler, I knew it was you. Besides, the only people who venture back into this area are clients who have business here. And by the way, I don't wear
drawers.
I wear thongs, boy shorts, bikinis, cheekies, and V-strings, thank you very much. And today's selection is a pair of boy shorts, which happen to be fuchsia, not pink.”

“That's TMI. Your ass still needs to be more careful,” he cautioned again.

Victoria rolled her eyes. “Let me get your grumpy behind some coffee before I have to curse you out first thing this morning.”

Victoria prepared their mugs, cut Tyler a slice of coffee cake that she'd baked yesterday afternoon, and then returned to the sofa, where he was now sitting.

“Thanks, and I get coffee cake, too,” Tyler said, licking his lips. He took a sip of coffee and dug into his morning treat. His mood was brighter already.

Victoria watched him drink and munch as she quietly sipped her coffee.

“So what's up? What have you done that requires the expert advice of my steel-trap mind?” Tyler said between bites of his cake.

“Who says that
I've
done anything?”

“Tyler, I really need your advice about something,” he mimicked, imitating the urgency in Victoria's voice when she had called. “I know you. So what's up?”

All Victoria could do was shake her head and slump her shoulders. She sat up and leaned forward, preparing to share her dilemma with the one person she knew would give her the best and most unbiased advice she could find.

Tyler knew how to combine the right amount of clinical professionalism with a good dose of humor and compassion, helping a troubled mind coast through difficult situations. He'd perfected that skill over the last eighteen years, counseling at-risk youth through Youths First Initiative, or YFI, as it was commonly called. He had founded the nonprofit organization for inner-city youths after graduating from Morehouse College. YFI was so successful that other nonprofit and mentoring organizations often sought his counsel, using the curriculum model he had developed as a blueprint for their own programs.

Tyler had practiced his own form of therapy when he battled two crippling losses four years ago. The first tragedy came when his aunt Beatrice, his mother's sister who had raised him after his parents' untimely deaths, had a massive stroke and died. Then, a year later, he lost his beloved wife, Juliet. Had it not been for the calm, steadfast support of Victoria, who stood by his side through his grief and depression, Tyler had no doubt that he wouldn't have survived those devastating days.

Juliet had been the love of Tyler's life. She was his soul mate in the truest sense, but their journey hadn't been an easy one. They'd broken up after college. Then, several years later, after more than a few failed relationships on her part and an ill-suited marriage that led to divorce on his, they had reunited and tied the knot, as they should have done in the beginning.

After losing both his parents in a tragic car accident as a young boy, Tyler had finally buried the hurt he'd been carrying when Juliet became his wife. But two years into their marriage, Juliet's health began to decline. A doctor's visit revealed that she had developed an aggressive form of kidney disease. Over the next eight months she and Tyler prayed and waited for an organ donor that never came.

Victoria sat on the edge of her seat and looked Tyler in the eye. “I saw Parker over the weekend.”

“Whoa.” Tyler took a deep breath, sitting his mug and empty dessert plate on the small coffee table in front of him. “Okay, tell me how it all went down.”

Victoria told him about her weekend as he listened patiently. She began with her shock at seeing Parker at Hilda Barrett's house on Saturday morning, and then again in her dreams later that night. She admitted that he'd been the first person she thought about when she awakened in bed the next morning, and that when she made a quick trip to the supermarket yesterday afternoon, she'd scanned the length of the produce aisle, wondering if she'd run into him again.

After she finished, she paused and let out a deep sigh, gripping the back of her neck, which had stiffened from her stress. “Of all the people to run into ... and after all these years.”

“Damn,”Tyler said. “So, is he married?”

“No, he's still single. Roberta, one of the parents, whose husband is good friends with Parker, said that he and his son's mother share custody.”

“Who's his baby mama?”

“Roberta said she's some high-powered attorney, so I'm assuming it's Pamela,” Victoria said, rolling her eyes. “She's the heifer he used to date ... the one who showed up for Christmas dinner when I went home with him to visit his family, remember?”

“Oh, I remember.” Tyler paused. “I'm not detecting a little jealousy, am I?”

“Don't be silly.”

Tyler cut Victoria a questioning look.

“I'm not jealous, but honestly ... I can't get Parker out of my mind. I keep thinking about him, seeing his face, and remembering things... .”

Tyler rubbed his fingers across his goatee, a feature that gave his boyish good looks a manly appeal. “What kinds of things?”

Victoria dropped her eyes to the floor. She'd never told Tyler about her recurring dream. “Romantic things ... um, sexual things.”

“Doin' the nasty?”

Victoria let out a small laugh in spite of herself. “You can be so crude.”

“But I'm always on point, and you know I'm gonna shoot it to you straight,”Tyler said, laughing along with her. “But, on the real, that's some serious shit.”

“Tell me about it.”

“You haven't told Ted yet, have you?”

“No, and I'm trying to figure out a good way to break it to him.”

BOOK: Keeping Secrets & Telling Lies

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