Katie's Dream (33 page)

“All Daddy's stories are good stories,” Sarah bragged. “He has the bestest stories of anybody. An' I know, 'cause our teacher told us one and it wasn't near as good. An' she's the
teacher.”

“They're just made up things,” Samuel said. “Not much of anything. But if you all lie down and get quiet, I'll tell another one.”

All the younger Hammonds lay down obediently, along with Robert and Sarah, even though I knew Robert and the boys his age or older didn't feel the same about bedtime stories as the littler ones did. Sam and Lizbeth, the oldest Hammond kids, walked back into the kitchen together, and I could tell they were discussing their day tomorrow, just what needed done by whom with their pa and Franky gone. And whether anybody ought to go along when young Sam rode into Mcleansboro. I sure hoped Franky would be well enough to come home soon. Three weeks they'd said he ought to be in that hospital bed, and then more time in bed at home.

“Tell a scary story this time,” Harry was begging Samuel.

“Well,” he said, sitting down in the middle of the floor. “I don't know if I know any scary stories.”

“I bet you do too!” Harry argued. “Ain't nothin' scary ever happened to you?”

Almost my heart skipped a beat when Samuel didn't answer right away. I wished I knew more about his relationship with his father. I wished he'd talked about it all a little more.

“Tell you what,” he suddenly said. “I think I just might be able to tell a story like that. Just a little bit scary, at least. Not too bad.”

“Good!” Harry proclaimed.

Katie was dead silent.

“Once upon a time there was a rabbit who—”

“A rabbit!” Rorey immediately interrupted. “Rabbits aren't scary.”

“Sshh!” Sarah scolded. “Maybe the rabbit got scared.” By the light of the oil lamp I could see her reach over and grasp Katie's hand.

Samuel waited a minute, just to make sure they all were quiet. “This rabbit got scared a lot. Almost every day, in fact. And especially at night. So much that everybody thought that he was scared of everything. The poor little rabbit couldn't even go outside without being afraid of a bird flying by, or a branch swinging in the breeze, or even of his own shadow.”

“That's a silly rabbit,” Sarah whispered.

“Yeah!” Harry proclaimed. “There's nothin' scary 'bout those things!”

“But one day a very big bear came to town,” Samuel told them. “Very, very big. Tall as eighteen or twenty rabbits, with the biggest teeth they'd ever seen. And every night he went prowling around, marking trees with his giant bear paws and growling really loud.”

“Did he eat rabbits?” Rorey asked.

“Well, the rabbits weren't sure,” Samuel continued. “But they were all very scared. And nobody could sleep because the bear made such an awful lot of noise going around scratching on tree trunks and growling all night. So they had a meeting and decided that somebody had better ask that bear to be quiet or move a little farther away.”

“I bet he got real mad about that,” Harry said.

“Shhh,” Sarah warned.

Kirk snickered. “Kids,” he whispered to Joe.

“Did the bear get mad?” Rorey asked.

“Maybe he ate 'em all up,” Harry suggested.

“How's he gonna finish the story if you don't hush up?” Robert asked them.

“It's all right,” Samuel said. “I don't mind a few comments. The problem those rabbits had was that none of them wanted to be the one to go and tell that bear. So they cut a whole pile of straws, all the same length. Except one. And they decided that every single rabbit had to take one, and whoever got the short one would have to go and ask that bear to be quiet or move.”

Samuel stopped for a second and looked over at me. I wasn't sure what I was seeing in his eyes. I couldn't help thinking about his words:
“What if he's out there somewhere, still wreaking havoc?”

“Bear paws,” I whispered.

Samuel looked at the floor for a moment. “Yes. This bear had big paws.” He glanced over at me and shook his head. “It had the biggest footprints any of them had ever seen. Nobody wanted to go talk to that bear. But they all drew a straw. And guess who got the short one?”

“The most scared rabbit?” Sarah asked.

“That's right. He thought he was going to fall over right there, just faint dead away. He thought there was just no way he could do it, he was so scared. But all of his friends were counting on him. They were all so tired and so sad and scared—”

“Did the bear eat him?” Harry asked quickly.

It was Joe that answered. “No, Harry. Just listen.”

“He thought the bear would eat him,” Samuel said, his voice a little slower. “But he went hopping away anyway, to do what he had to do. He hopped and he hopped, looking for that bear, and he was still looking when it began to get dark.”

None of the children said a word. Samuel paused, looking around at all of them and at me for just a second.

“What happened?” Sarah said, sounding a little nervous.

“At first he didn't find anything at all. And then he began to hear, way off in the distance, that big bear growl, sounding really mad and mean. He wanted to just turn around and run. He thought he should, but he couldn't get his little hopping legs to move. So he just stayed right there, saying, ‘Please be quiet, please be quiet,' over and over again.”

“And then what?” Rorey asked.

“The bear came closer and closer. Closer and closer. The little rabbit could hear those awfully sharp big bear claws tearing at the trees. And that growl sounded so awful fierce, he could just scream with fright. The bear came closer and closer and closer, and the rabbit got more and more scared. He couldn't even twitch his nose, he was so scared, and just when the bear came bursting through the trees near him and he thought he just couldn't stand it anymore, he opened his little mouth and he screamed—”

Samuel stopped. Nobody breathed a word; nobody moved. “Do you know what he screamed?” he asked.

“Nope,” Sarah said timidly.

“‘Please be quiet!'”
Samuel said, making a whisper sound huge. “He said it so loud that he startled himself. He fell over backward, and he was just about to run away when he heard something very strange.”

“What?” Harry asked.

“Yeah, what?” Rorey echoed.

“It was the bear. At least he thought it was. On the other side of a big tree. The rabbit went just a little closer, and he could hardly believe that he saw that great big bear sitting there shaking and crying his eyes out. The rabbit was so stunned he almost forgot to say anything, but then he remembered his tongue and said, ‘Why are you crying?' The big bear nearly jumped clear out of his skin. ‘Don't hurt me,' the bear said. ‘Don't hurt me.'”

Harry laughed. “What a dummy bear!”

“Why was the big bear scared?” Sarah asked.

“That's what the rabbit wondered. He even asked him. He sat down beside him and promised not to hurt him and told him all about the rabbits and the straws and how scared he'd been. And that bear admitted something that he'd never told anybody else. He was afraid of the dark. He went roaring through the woods every night making all kinds of noise because he was really afraid that if he just lay down and went to sleep in the dark, somebody would sneak up on him and scare him awake. So he kept everybody else too scared to come close. Until the rabbit startled him so much it made him cry.”

The room was quiet for a moment. “How do you think of stuff like that?” Joe finally asked.

“It's not hard,” Samuel said. “I don't even really try.”

“It's kinda dumb for a bear to be so scared,” Harry observed. “A bear could beat up anythin'.”

“But that bear didn't think so. He didn't feel strong at all. But the rabbits helped him. They let him sleep every night with a circle of rabbits around him so he would feel safer. And then all the rabbits could sleep too.”

“That might be your strangest story ever, Dad,” Robert said.

“Maybe so,” Samuel admitted. “But it might also be the truest.”

“What do you mean?”

“People can be like that. Some people act the roughest and toughest when they're really scared inside and don't want anybody to know. And some people who think they're too scared to do anything are the bravest and most daring of all when a real problem happens.”

“Really?” Sarah asked.

“Sounds strange. But it's true.”

“Are bullies really scared inside?” she asked.

“Probably. And sad and mixed-up too.”

“You mean like Uncle Edward?” Robert asked.

Samuel got quiet. “Yeah. I guess.”

“So maybe I'm brave,” Katie said in a tiny voice.

And at that moment, I wanted to keep her. Whoever she was, whatever the truth came out to be, she belonged with us. She fit. With Sarah. With the whole bunch of kids. But especially with Samuel, no matter what anybody said. There was something more alike about them than the dark hair and dark eyes. They were family. They had to be. They'd survived the cruel legacy of Samuel's past, lived through Edward's assaults, and understood human nature better because of it.

“Time to sleep,” I said quietly, not sure anyone even heard.

“Time to sleep,” Samuel echoed. “No bears here, scared or otherwise. Close your eyes. Thank the Lord for this home, and his peace—”

“We oughta pray for Franky,” Sarah said. “I think he's very brave. Even if he don't act scared.”

I had to smile. Samuel prayed for Franky. And Sarah, Robert, and Joe said amen.

Soon they were all asleep, and Lizbeth and young Sam were done talking and ready to lie down too.

“We think Pa'll want to come home tomorrow,” Lizbeth told us. “But I prob'ly oughta stay with the little ones like he said, so if he comes back, Sam's gonna stay. We don't want Franky to be up there alone.”

“Thank you,” I told them. “That's good of you both.”

The house got very quiet after that. Samuel and I lay down together in the bedroom, and at first neither of us said anything. He was so still beside me. I wondered what he was thinking. When I laid my head down on his shoulder, he didn't even move.

“Can I call you Sammy again?” I whispered.

He took me in his arms and kissed the top of my head. “I was just upset. You can call me anything you want. But it sounds different, coming from Edward.”

“Everything sounds different from him. Like it gets dipped in spite before it comes out of his mouth.”

“Probably does. I should've been writing to him. I should've been better—”

“None of them wanted anything from you,” I told him. “Your mother doesn't even answer your letters. It's nothing to beat yourself up over.”

He sighed. “I don't know how Edward's going to react, you know. About Katie's daddy having a bird on his arm. I guess Trudy Vale never told him that.”

“Maybe he'll never know about it. He might not come back.”

“He will. I don't know why. But I think he will.”

“Do you want to go to Dearing tomorrow?”

“I don't know. I hate to go asking Barrett for the truck again. And they're using the wagon. Sometimes it seems like I ought to stay home till I can make a better way for myself.”

“Samuel . . .”

He rolled slightly, taking me with him.

“I don't know what I want. I'm not sure what to think. I don't even know for sure about what Katie was telling me, how much is real and how much is a dream.”

“Or maybe both?”

He was quiet.

“I think it's both with you, Samuel. I don't understand all of it. But I'd like to. Tell me more about bear paws.”

“There's nothing more to tell.”

“There must be. Why would you say it in your sleep?”

“Who knows? I could say all manner of gibberish—”

“But it isn't gibberish. It meant something to you.” He sighed again. “I guess it's like my dumb story. Dewey
and I were pretending to be tough. Acting like we were a couple of braves from the bear clan, but when it came right down to it, we were always scared. Both of us. That's why we ran off in the first place.”

“There's nothing wrong with that.”

“Maybe not. But maybe I'm still running and hiding. I don't want to talk to my mother. I don't think I want to know.”

“You never had proof of his death?”

“What kind of proof would there be? We never went to a funeral. Mother's word was good enough. I don't even know where the funeral was supposed to be. She didn't go. But who could expect her to? He broke her nose twice.”

“Oh, Samuel.”

“Shhh. Okay? I don't want to hear any ‘Oh, Samuel.' I want you to treat me like always and talk to me like always. I'm no different than I ever was.”