Kate's Progress (34 page)

Kate considered. Her ankle was throbbing, and she felt the sort of bone-weariness you feel after shock, but her headache had mostly gone. She started to sit up and discovered some additional pains, a bruised elbow and some torn muscles around her ribs. ‘Not too bad,’ she said. Jocasta put the mug down and came to help her sit up. Kate discovered Chewy was sprawled across the end of her bed, and Sylvester was resting against her waist, a big warm marmalade lump. He didn’t shift as she sat up, but purred loudly and placatingly. ‘What’s the time?’

‘Half past seven. Mummy said not to wake you but I wanted to see you before I went. And you were awake, weren’t you?’

‘Yes,’ Kate said obligingly. She’d been asleep for sixteen hours. She discovered she had a raging thirst. ‘Thanks for the tea,’ she said, and sipped gratefully.

‘Everyone’s gone,’ Jocasta said discontentedly. ‘Mostly last night, but Addison went this morning. She’s gone to London for two days, back tomorrow night. And I’ve got to go back to horrible school. I’ve got to leave in a minute, and I won’t be able to see you until next weekend, if I can get an exeat. I
hate
school!’

‘But you’ll see your friends,’ Kate offered. ‘You do have friends there?’

‘Oh, some, but they all live so far away, right on the other side of Taunton, so I only see them at school, and you can’t really be proper friends like that. If only I went to day school, the other girls would be living nearby, and I could see them after school and weekends and everything.’

Kate saw the point. ‘
Is
there a day school you could go to?’

‘Course there is,’ said Jocasta eagerly. ‘That’s why it’s so stupid making me go to St Hilda’s. There’s Comyns at Withypool, which everybody says is a brilliant school. If I went there, Mummy could drive me, or I could even go by bus. I’d
love
to go to school on the bus. And then I’d be able to ride Daphne every day instead of once in a blue moon. And walk the dogs and everything. It would be awesome.’ She sighed. ‘But Mummy won’t listen.’ She caressed Chewy’s head, and he beat his tail, but without opening his eyes. ‘I’m glad you like animals. That horrible Addison hates them. She made such a fuss last night about the dogs. She made Ed shut them out in the welly lobby. And then she found Sylvester’s hair all over her suit that she wanted to wear today, and you should have heard her! I told her he’s part Persian and they shed all the time but it didn’t make any difference. She looked at him as if she’d like to kill him. And shedding’s the only pleasure he’s got left in life, poor darling, since he’s been fixed – isn’t it, poor Wester?’ she crooned, stroking him. Sylvester purred even harder in agreement.

Jack put his head round the door. ‘Oh, there you are. You’d better get your stuff together. I’m leaving in five minutes.’

‘Jack’s driving me to school,’ Jocasta explained, ‘because Mummy’s having a lie in.’ She got up from the bed. ‘I say, you
will
still be here next weekend, if I can get an exeat?’

Kate hesitated, not knowing what to say, but Jack intervened. ‘She will,’ he said firmly. ‘Now go and get your stuff. Be downstairs in five minutes or you can walk to school.’

‘I would, too,’ she said, exiting. ‘It’d mean less time there.’

‘How are you feeling?’ Jack asked when she had gone.

‘Not too bad.’

‘No headache?’

‘No, just a stiff neck.’

‘No headache is good – that means no concussion. Ed was terrified you had a secret one and would wake up dead this morning, and it’d be his fault for not making you go to A&E. That man is seriously short of things to worry about. Look, I’ve got to go – I’ll see you tonight. Don’t even think about leaving – you’re to stay here until you’re a hundred per cent.’

She nodded, feeling exhausted. All this enthusiasm was wearing her out. ‘Did you have a nice weekend?’ she managed to ask. ‘You seemed to be, with Theo and Flick.’

‘He’s a fabulous kid, isn’t he? And it was surprisingly nice to catch up with Flick, too. She didn’t harangue me, for once. She’s good company when she’s not reminding me of my various sins – which I know all too well in any case.’

‘I’m starting to think there’s more talk of sin than actual sinning,’ Kate said sagely.

He grinned. ‘How little you know me!’ And went.

About half an hour later, Mrs B came up with a tray of breakfast, chased the animals off her bed, plumped up her pillows and placed the tray across her knees. Ed followed her into the room, and she answered the same questions again.

‘If you feel the slightest bit sick, headachy, faint, spots before the eyes, anything like, you’re to tell me at once,’ he ordained.

‘I haven’t got concussion. I just feel tired. And my foot hurts.’

‘I’ve brought you paracetamol,’ he said, placing two on the tray. ‘Have a sleep when you’ve finished breakfast. That’s the best thing for you.’

He was looking more than usually grim this morning, and she felt it was her fault. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said as he was going.

He turned back. ‘What for?’

‘For falling off Magic. Giving you all so much trouble. Letting you down.’

‘Letting
me
down?’ He raised his eyebrows.

‘Look, I can see you’re cross with me,’ she said, ‘and I don’t blame you at all. I loused up your day. Dragged you away before you had a chance to ride in the open.’

‘I’m not cross,’ he said, and sounded genuinely surprised, though there was no hint of a smile anywhere. ‘It wasn’t your fault. And I don’t care about the open. I was worried about you, that’s all.’

She bit her lip. ‘About Henna,’ she began hesitantly. She wasn’t entirely sure what she was going to say. She wanted to tell him she hadn’t pulled out of riding Henna because she was scared, but she couldn’t do that without exposing Addison.

He interrupted her. ‘Let’s not talk about it. No post-mortems. Eat your breakfast and have a sleep. I’ll look in on you later.’ She liked the sound of that. ‘Is there anything you need?’ She shook her head. He looked at her a moment as if he was about to say something, and abruptly left her.

She had not long finished breakfast and was sipping the last of her second cup of tea when Camilla came in, in a negligee of fabulous luxury, all chiffon billows and foamy lace. Her face was shiny with moisturizer, and without make-up she looked younger and, somehow, prettier. She had Esmé in her arms, and plonked the dog down on the bed before sitting herself. ‘Well, you look better,’ she said. ‘I
told
Ed you didn’t have concussion. He was fretting himself to an ulcer last night. It was all Addison and I could do to make him sit down properly to dinner and not keep dashing upstairs to check you were still breathing.’

‘He has a strong sense of responsibility,’ Kate said, suppressing any pleasure this evidence of concern might give her.

‘I know, but there are limits. Addison got quite short with him in the end, told him to stop spoiling everyone’s dinner. She’s gone up to town this morning, won’t be back until tomorrow.’

‘I know. Jocasta told me.’

Camilla sighed. ‘I shall miss her. I hate it when everyone goes away after a weekend, and I’m left all alone here. This place is so dreary without company. I even miss Jocasta – though she made such a fuss about going this morning I almost smacked her,’ she added with an abrupt change of expression.

‘Wouldn’t you like to have her around all the time?’ Kate asked, thinking of the day school.

‘Well, yes and no. It would be better than being here all alone. But it’s not the same as adult company. Especially male company.’

‘You have Ed and Jack.’

‘But they’re my stepsons. You don’t count them.’ She sighed again, staring off into space. ‘There are times when I almost think it would be worth …’ She trailed off.

‘Yes?’ Kate encouraged.

‘Oh. Nothing.’ She shifted restlessly. ‘There’s just nothing to do here. And you can’t spend every minute of every day shopping.’

Kate swallowed this near-heresy with silent surprise. If Camilla was tired of shopping, she was tired of life.

‘I almost envy Addison, having her job. Not that I’d like
her
job, but it’s something to do. Don’t you think she looked fabulous on Henna?’ she asked abruptly. Kate nodded. ‘It was such a shame she got eliminated. She ought to have had more practice on her before the race. But she looked so good in the saddle, I’m thinking of maybe riding more myself. There aren’t many points left, but there are the shows in the summer, and she jumps really well. Harry was saying that head-tossing can be cured with schooling. He said he’d help me if I wanted.’

‘That would be good,’ Kate said. ‘He’s a kind man.’

‘Yes,’ Camilla said. ‘One feels such confidence when he’s around. You should have seen how he organized everything yesterday after you came off, talked to the doctor, got the horses boxed, calmed Ed down, told him to take Addison and Henna home while he and I drove you.’

‘I should think he must be a capable man,’ Kate said. ‘Used to command, after all.’

‘Mmm,’ said Camilla, deep in her own train of thought. ‘He’s a good dancer, too,’ she said at the end of it. ‘It’s such a shame he’s not better off. Well, I suppose I’d better go and get dressed. I think I’ll drive over to the country club, see if anyone’s around for lunch and a few rubbers of bridge.’ She stood up. ‘One has to do something.’ She reached the door, and said, as a throwaway line, ‘Harry’s a good bridge player. I couldn’t respect a man who couldn’t play bridge.’

She was gone. Sylvester, with the air of having been waiting just outside, walked in, tail aloft, purring like a dynamo, and sprang lightly up on to the bed, squinting his eyes at her beguilingly. ‘All right,’ she said. She moved the tray to the bedside cabinet. Sylvester walked up the bed, flirted his nostrils delicately at the tray and decided there was nothing there worth investigating, turned round three times and settled himself in the hollow of Kate’s waist.

Kate fell asleep.

When she woke, the sun was shining outside her small window, and Ed was there, sitting in the armchair, working on a laptop. He looked across as she stirred, and said, ‘I decided I’d have to appoint myself gatekeeper or you wouldn’t get any rest.’

Kate counted ostentatiously on her fingers. ‘I think I’ve seen everyone. Oh, except Mr Bradshaw.’

‘Nothing to stop people coming in twice.’ He wasn’t looking so grim, and that was almost a joke. She tried, carefully, to smile. It didn’t seem to annoy him. He said. ‘How do you feel now? Would you like some lunch?’

‘Mm. Maybe something light. I would like a bath, though, or a shower. I feel slummy.’

‘Better give that a miss today. That strapping ought to stay on at least for today and you need to keep it dry. If I help you to the bathroom, though, you could have a wash at the basin.’

‘Thanks. I need to go to the bathroom anyway,’ she added, feeling rather embarrassed at mentioning it.

‘Of course. I should have thought. I’m sorry.’

He helped her to sit up and she swung her legs out of bed. She was wearing pyjamas, and she wondered in a searing moment who took off her clothes and put her in them. She stood up on her good leg, put the bad one to the floor for a second, and lifted it again sharply.

‘Don’t try to walk on it yet. The doctor said it’s a bad sprain. Complete rest for a couple of days at least. I’ll carry you.’

He did, and she rested her head against his shoulder and tried not to think that this was as close to him as she would ever get. He deposited her carefully in the bathroom, warned her to hop and hold on to something, and left her. ‘I’ll be outside. Call when you’re ready to go back.’

She went to the loo, washed as much of herself as she could reach, cleaned her teeth, did something about her hair, and was carried back to bed feeling a lot more human. She discovered he had made her bed while she was out, and now he helped her into it, drew up the covers and arranged her pillows with a competent hand.

‘What makes you such a good nurse?’ she asked.

‘Anyone would do the same,’ he said.

‘Not anyone. Some people get annoyed by helplessness, others respond kindly to it.’

‘I suppose it’s being brought up with animals,’ he said. ‘My father used to take me round the farms, especially at lambing time. If there was a lamb or calf that had to be bottle-reared, I always wanted to do it.’ He paused, remembering. ‘He had a pointer bitch that we helped to whelp. He gave me a pup. That was my first dog – Hazy. I had her fifteen years. She was a good bitch.’ His face had softened. ‘And then there was Jack, of course – the most helpless creature of all, growing up without a mother. I always had to look after him.’

She didn’t point out that he had grown up without a mother, too. She could see that he automatically discounted himself from the ranks of those who needed comforting and looking after. She longed to show him it could be a two-way street. She somehow couldn’t visualize Addison mothering him.

But of course, as a wise person had said, you never know how people are when they’re alone together.

She said tentatively, ‘I hear Addison’s coming back tomorrow.’

‘Tomorrow night,’ he said tersely.

She had spoilt it. The slight softening had gone. The grim expression was back. But he looked – she studied him covertly for a moment – troubled, rather than angry in any degree. Unhappy. Something about Addison coming back made him unhappy. Well, perhaps it was
her
presence in the house. Addison had made it clear she didn’t want trespassers on her patch, and Kate had seen how she was perfectly willing to make her feelings known. Probably poor Ed was anticipating a storm from the beloved about Kate not having been sent away.

‘I could go home, you know,’ she offered in a small voice.

‘Home?’ He came back from his thoughts abruptly.

‘To Little’s. I don’t want to be a nuisance.’

‘Don’t be silly,’ he said firmly. ‘You stay here. Now I’m going to get you some lunch.’

She got up the next morning, dressed, and Ed carried her downstairs to the drawing room where he arranged her on a sofa near a window so she could see out. ‘You can’t think what a difference it makes, just to have a change of scene,’ she said. ‘I feel an awful fraud, being treated like an invalid when I feel fine.’ But she didn’t, quite. She still felt very tired, and strangely languid.