Karma Patrol (14 page)

Jade nodded. “She’s the field representative from the Interpersonal Relations Division that I was telling you about—the one who showed me your picture? She was joking about us dating because she knows we’re soulmates.”

“How about the guy in the blue shirt?” he proposed, looking through his binoculars for a long moment as he tried to find something to distract her from the topic of soulmates. “He looks suspicious.”

“I get the impression that you think everyone looks suspicious,” she informed him, her lips quirking into a smile, but she looked through her own binoculars to spot the man he’d indicated. “Ooh, good choice. Big red line—he’s headed for a major negative karmic consequence.”

“Like what?”

“I can’t be sure, because it’s not slated to happen for a couple of hours, but it feels like a car accident.” She pulled her binoculars away from her eyes to look up at him. “It also feels final. If you want to double check my ability to predict karmic consequences, I’d suggest you check with the Midtown North traffic cops at the end of the day and see if that guy gets killed in a hit and run.”

He set down the binoculars she’d given him, catching and holding her gaze.

“You know, when you say something like that, it makes me wonder if you’re going to go run him down with a car in order to prove yourself right.”

“I know,” she agreed placidly. “Because you’re incredibly skeptical and also borderline paranoid. But that’s what’s going to happen, and I’m not going to have to do anything to contribute to it unless he gets blocked.”

“Blocked?”

“Interrupted by someone else’s free will, like that woman who would have been hit by the car. That driver shouldn’t have been on the street at that moment, but he made a choice to speed down the road. His choice nearly derailed her intended karmic path. That’s the reason I have a job in the first place. If people didn’t have free will, things would all go according to fate and there wouldn’t be any reason for me to interfere.”

“It really is like being a cop,” he mused. “If people didn’t make the choice to break the law and everyone just did what they were supposed to do, there wouldn’t be any need for us either.”

They shared a moment of commiseration, which surprised him because he hadn’t realized they had anything at all in common.

“I still think you’re crazy,” he said finally.

She snickered, taking a seat on the edge of the bed next to the window. She didn’t ask him to sit down and he didn’t make any moves in that direction, still distracted by the mental image of Jade in the bed.

“I’m not crazy. If you want crazy, go talk to a prophet.”

“A prophet?” he echoed, and she nodded.

“Karma Division doesn’t have prophets. All of us can see the plans that Karma has for each individual person, the rewards and consequences they’re supposed to be getting for their positive or negative karmic account balances, but that’s it. We don’t see whatever plan the universe has for their entire lives.”

“That’s what prophets do?”

She nodded. “Not only do they see the Grand Plan for each individual person, but they see it for neighborhoods, for cities, for states and countries and the whole entire world. It’s too much for a normal human brain to handle, which means most of them are stark raving mad. Destiny Division, the part of our organization that the prophets work for, actually has a lot of people working in mental hospitals because most of the prophets end up there sooner or later, ranting about fate and consequences and the end of days.”

“Is someone planning the end of days?” he asked, disturbed by the idea.

“No idea. It’s above my paygrade.” He gave her a sharp look and she shrugged. “I don’t know what you want me to say. It would be like me asking a regular traffic cop what the NYPD commissioner’s plans are for tracking down terrorists in New York.”

“So what does all of this fate and destiny stuff mean for me?”

She frowned at him, an expression that wrinkled her nose in a manner even he had to call cute. “What do you mean?”

“This—” He gestured vaguely, holding back a sigh as he said the word. “This soulmate stuff. Does everyone have one?”

“No. It’s actually pretty rare.”

“So I just got lucky?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know why some people get chosen and some don’t.”

“Fine, I won the soulmate lottery. If what you’re telling me about karma and fate and all of that is true, then what does it mean that we’re soulmates? Was I supposed to fall in love with you at first sight or something?”

“Oh.” She shrugged, curling her knees up to her chest and hugging them in a gesture that made her look young and vulnerable. “It means we’re destined to be together. It doesn’t necessarily mean that we’ll get married or have children or anything. It doesn’t even have to mean that we’ll fall in love. Most soulmates do; there’s a bond between them that sort of pushes them into it. Still, some people can fight the urge, and occasionally you find a pair who are just good friends. Every once in a while you meet a pair who don’t even like each other that much, but they
need
each other on a fundamental level that’s impossible for them to ignore. Basically, we’re stuck with each other for life, whether you fall in love with me or not.”

“How long have you known about this?”

“I’ve known I had a soulmate since I was a teenager,” she replied, still sounding hesitant. “I didn’t know it was you until yesterday.”

For just a moment, he stopped with his mental questioning of her sanity, his contemplation of the incredible concept that destiny and fate and karma were all tangible things that decided the course of people’s lives, and thought about what it must be like to be Jade Bailey. She was twenty-nine and living alone in a studio apartment in Midtown, devoting what seemed to be every waking moment to making sure things in her neighborhood functioned smoothly, running her little part of the world behind the scenes and never telling anyone what she was really doing. He realized with sudden clarity how lonely she must be. It was like doing undercover work as a cop, complete with the inability to share anything real with anyone because it would jeopardize what you were supposed to accomplish.

“I’ve clung to that promise my whole life, you know,” she added, seeming to read his train of thought. “Doing this job isn’t always easy. Actually, it can be pretty tough, and none of the people I work myself into the ground to help even know what I’m doing for them. I have friends who are on the job, but we’re all so busy that there isn’t a lot of time to commiserate with each other about the hardships. I’ve always clung to the idea that at least I’m one of the lucky few who gets to have a soulmate. I thought that eventually, when I found you, you would be the one person in the world who would understand what I go through. That I’d finally have someone who would support me no matter what.”

“And you got me instead,” he finished for her, his chest aching at the joke the universe had played on Jade. She’d spent her whole life trying to do the right thing, relying on the belief that someday she would be rewarded with a man who would love her and support her the way she deserved, and the universe had given her him instead. He’d been nothing but unpleasant to her since they’d met, and had gone so far as to accuse her of being in league with a killer. She had to be reevaluating her entire belief system right now because of him.

“Listen, Jade, there’s something you should know about me.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Her voice was rough with unshed tears, and she cleared her throat before continuing. “You don’t have any obligation to me, Luke. Maybe Interpersonal Relations made a mistake. It happens. Maybe we’ll end up as one of those soulmate pairs who just become friends, or the ones who can barely stand each other. I’ve always known that was a possibility. I just—I expected more. I don’t know, maybe I thought I deserved more. Maybe this is all just a karmic reminder that you have to earn the rewards you want.”

“Come on,” he protested, his tone incredulous. “You can’t seriously believe that you got stuck with me because of something you did wrong. I’m not some karmic punishment for you not performing well enough.”

“I wanted my soulmate to love me,” she replied quietly, the words wrenched from deep inside her. “But you don’t even like me.”

“It isn’t you, Jade. I’ve never loved anyone.” That admission, a closely kept secret, wasn’t as difficult to divulge as he’d thought it would be. “I’ve had a pretty crappy life, okay? I learned early that it wasn’t safe to trust people. I’m a jerk to everyone because it’s easier than letting them in. It isn’t you or anything you did. This is just who I am.”

He met her eyes and saw understanding shining in their bright green depths. There was pity there, too; for him or for herself, he didn’t know. He looked at Jade, at the disappointment on her face, and for a split second he wondered if he was wrong to keep himself held apart from the rest of the world, to protect himself by pushing people away.

Then the moment passed.

“I should go,” he said abruptly, shoving the binoculars back at her and ignoring her surprise as he moved into the living room, grabbing his shirt and jacket from where they still lay on the couch.

“Don’t leave,” Jade pleaded, but he shook his head.

“I can’t do this. I can’t—” He exhaled sharply. “I’m sorry.”

“Luke, wait—”

He was gone before she could reach him, disappearing out the door and nearly bumping into the woman standing at Jade’s front door in his rush to get out.

ice,” Shannon murmured, appreciative, as she watched Luke storm down the hall. He clearly hadn’t noticed her, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t notice him. He might be one half of a soulmate pair, and therefore off limits, but she could still look. Once he was out of view, she turned to Jade, standing in the doorway of her apartment. “I know you weren’t happy about the wait to find your soulmate, but I maintain my position that he was worth it. Biceps like those don’t come along everyday.”

Jade didn’t seem to hear her, staring down the hall as though she could summon Luke back to her door through the power of her gaze alone.

“Jade? Sweetie?” Shannon waved a hand in front of Jade’s face, making her jerk back in surprise. “Hey. Earth to Jade.”

“Shannon?”

She sounded lost, and Shannon frowned as a tear trickled down the other woman’s cheek.

“What’s wrong, Jade?”

“He left.”

“Come sit down,” Shannon prompted her, pushing the front door shut and putting an arm around Jade’s shoulders.

Jade let herself be led to the couch, sitting numbly on the cushions, and Shannon sighed when her friend started to cry in earnest

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this upset,” Shannon said, offering Jade the box of tissues that usually lived on the coffee table. “My app told me there was a big spike in your bond’s distress level, so I came over to check on you. What did he do? Do you need me to go beat him up? Because I’d be terrible at that, but I know a couple of guys who could do it.”

“He left,” Jade said again, her voice wavering as she swiped at her face with a tissue. It came away streaked with black, evidence that she’d neglected to wear waterproof mascara today. “I did everything
right. I always do everything right, and I’ve waited my whole life for this, and maybe it wasn’t the way I wanted it to go, but I did the best I could anyway, and then he just
left
. How could he leave?”