Journey of the Bride (8 page)

“
What about her?
”
His hands twitched. Talking about Courtney left a bitter taste in his mouth. He wasn
’
t certain how he felt about her exactly. He didn
’
t love her, at least he didn
’
t think he did, but she had changed his life in the short time she
’
d been on the ranch. The biggest thing was that she hadn
’
t made any objection to his words. When he
’
d told her to leave, she had. He could see how much he hurt her every day she
’
d remained, but she hadn
’
t said a word to him about it.

On more than one occasion, he had noticed her watching him. He had also noted how her eyes grew softer when she did, how her shoulders drooped and her hands fell to her sides, as if in defeat. Had she wanted to stay? Had she wanted to remain despite his effort to push her back toward the life she deserved?

“
Do you remember what she said to you?
”

Brandon looked up at him, confusion plain on his face. What was Paul talking about? What had Courtney said to him?

“
Remember? When you told her about Elizabeth?
”

Brandon turned away, searching his memory for the conversation they
’
d had. He
’
d been so angry with Paul. It had blinded him in a lot of ways. He didn
’
t know what his brother was talking about now. What had Courtney said? He remembered it had stunned him, remembered that he
’
d never thought of what she
’
d told him before, but what had she said. It had to deal with his feelings toward Elizabeth. He didn
’
t love her. He didn
’
t love Elizabeth. If he had, he would have gone after her when she left him. Courtney hadn
’
t known Elizabeth though, and truth be told, she didn
’
t know him.

Then again, maybe she
’
d been right about him after all.

Satisfied that Brandon remembered, Paul nodded his head when his brother looked at him.
“
Do you love Courtney?
”

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He remembered the touch of her skin on his though. He remembered the smell of her hair. He remember the taste of her mouth. She
’
d been warm and loving. She
’
d been soft and yielding to him. She had given him everything, and he
’
d sent her away. What kind of a man was he?

“
I don
’
t know,
”
he answered honestly. He shook his head and frowned at Paul.
“
I just don
’
t know.
”

A deep frown crossed his older brother
’
s face as he looked at him with unyielding eyes.
“
Well, you need to decide soon,
”
he told him.

“
Oh? Why
’
s that?
”

Brandon
’
s blood ran cold with Paul
’
s next words.
“
Because she
’
s getting married, and only you have the ability to stop it.
”

Courtney paced the floor back and forth, not certain who to be angry at more
—
herself or her father. Somehow, in her conversation with Talbert a couple of days before, she
’
d convinced him she was the perfect woman to take as his wife, but rather than asking her for her hand, which she would have refused outright, he
’
d gone to her father.

Of course, her father loved him as a second son and agreed wholeheartedly. His precious daughter would be cared for. She would have a home with an intelligent, loving husband who could provide for her future. She was in good hands. At least, that
’
s what her father honestly believed.

She knew that she
’
d never convince him otherwise. Especially when he
’
d been so happy.

“
My darling daughter!
”
he
’
d called up the stairs.

Only a short hour before, she had retired to her room in an effort to escape Talbert and his words. It was getting harder and harder for her to bite her tongue. Living among the ranch hands had given her a foul mouth and taught her that if she didn
’
t speak her mind right away, she
’
d regret it.

Among her father and his guest, that simply would not do. Even worse were the thoughts she wanted to say aloud. She wanted to reveal how much of a conniving snake Talbert was.

“
Yes, Father?
”

“
Would you delight us with your company for a moment?
”

Ever since returning from the ranch, she
’
d discovered how society
’
s propriety irritated her. Her father
’
s words made her skin itch. At the ranch, she would have simply said,
“
Come here, please,
”
and the men would have answered her call, or vice versa.

Etiquette meant so much more here, but it was much more meaningless and preposterous. It made her want to laugh. It was all a joke, a mockery, a shame, and she hated it.

Without it, she could be free. She understood that now and missed such. The social norms she
’
d grown up with were a gilded cage, one she hated now that she knew better existed out in the world.

My eyes have been opened,
she thought.
And the world is a darker place for such.

It didn
’
t matter though. Her father and his guest waited upon her. She made her way downstairs, past Gerald who frowned, which made her nauseous. Whatever was going on, she knew she wasn
’
t going to like it.

As soon as she entered the library where he father stood talking with Talbert, he beamed at her, as if his entire world had been made in an instant. It was not a comforting expression based on the company he was partaking of at the moment. She kept her expression cool though and returned his smile with one of her own.
“
What can I do for you, Father?
”
she asked.

She was, first and foremost in her father
’
s house, a lady. She dressed as such, wearing lace gloves out in public as well as a bonnet to cover her hair and carrying a parasol to shield her face from the sun.

At the ranch, as long as she was clothed, no one had cared. No one held her hand before him as if presenting a delicate flower to someone as her father did before Talbert now. No one smiled at her as if they knew something she didn
’
t, a surprise meant to make her feel grand. There were no hidden agendas, no expectations beyond that of filling empty bellies and being herself. She
’
d been free. She
’
d been happy.

As she stood before Talbert, with her father standing like the third point of a triangle, a grin upon his face, Courtney wished she were back on the ranch, back feeding the hired ranch hands, back in the arms of the man she
’
d married.

You
’
re not married to him any longer,
she scolded herself. Such was true. Brandon had demanded annulment paperwork, which both of them had signed before she returned home. He
’
d given the paperwork to Paul with the expectations that he file it as soon as he could. Paul had assured her and Brandon she
’
d be a le Brush again by noon the following day.

The thought had appeased Brandon, and he
’
d only glanced at Courtney a moment, tipping his hat to her out of respect before he rode off. It was as if she
’
d never been married, which she guessed she should have been grateful of. It meant answering fewer questions. She could only imagine her father
’
s reaction to that short-lived adventure.

“
Young Simon Talbert here has asked for your hand in marriage,
”
her father said brightly.

“
Excuse me?
”
The response exited her mouth before she could stop it. Her eyes widened and she swiveled her head from her father to Talbert, who stood before her with a smug look on his too-handsome face. Brandon had been rugged, rough and all man. The man whom her father wanted her to marry was too pretty and pompous. It disgusted Courtney to think of having sex with the man.

A memory of Brandon
’
s hands on her skin, his cock buried inside her, flashed through her mind. It had been wild and frantic, needy and desirable. Somehow, she knew sex with Talbert would be boring and disgusting.

Nausea rose up in her, but she held it back with one hand to her mouth and the other to her stomach. Her father didn
’
t notice. He was too busy explaining how he and Talbert had come to the conclusion that the best decision for her life was for the young accountant to marry her. He had the finances to support her, a good home, decent standing within the community.

All of his words went in one ear and out the other unheard. She looked down at the floor, her breath coming out in heavy pants. Her blood roared in her ears. She had known the possibility of Talbert asking for her hand were high, but she hadn
’
t expected him to go through her father in order to ask for her hand. She
’
d been prepared to turn him down herself.

Her eyes darted frantically from man to man, but neither noticed her panic, which was climbing higher and higher, threatening to swallow her whole. Inside her mind, she felt herself drowning and although she clawed at the edges of the darkness, she could not find her way to the light.

Talbert and her father continued speaking of terms and negotiations in good cheer. Her agitation continued to go unnoticed by either.

“
I can
’
t marry, Talbert,
”
she whispered, staring down at the floor.

“
What was that dear?
”
her father asked, turning his attention back toward her for the first time.
“
Courtney!
”
He lunged to her side just as she swooned.

It was Talbert who carried Courtney to her room. All the while, she mumbled the name,
“
Brandon,
”
in a low voice.

After laying her down in bed, Talbert turned toward her father, confusion mixed with anger clear on his face.
“
Who
’
s Brandon?
”
he demanded.

Looking down at his daughter, the senior le Brush had no answer.
“
I
…
I honestly don
’
t know. We shall ask her when she awakens.
”

It was later in the evening when Courtney came to, but by then her actions had been dismissed as a result of the heat as well as that of excitement towards her engagement. Neither man brought up the name of the cowboy she
’
d been calling for in her sleep.

Preparations for the wedding had started that evening. Talbert wanted a short engagement. Her father didn
’
t seem to mind so much. In his mind, it meant a sooner possibility of seeing grandchildren.

So for a week, Courtney was pushed and prodded. Flowers, food, and a dress fitting. Her mind spun and she felt sick to her stomach. There was no way she could go through this. She had to stop the wedding. She had to tell her father the real reason Talbert wanted to marry her.

Her father would never believe her about Talbert
’
s involvement with their finances. She knew that before her father announced the engagement. Now, it was set in stone as her father
’
s fortune had begun miraculously re-appearing in his accounts. Talbert, of course, blamed the bank, claiming there had been mistakes. Her father believed him. Courtney did not.

Now, it was too late. She glared at the wedding gown she was supposed to wear in the morning, wishing it would burst into flame, but knowing it wouldn
’
t.

“
This isn
’
t happening,
”
she whispered to herself, pressing a hand to her forehead.
“
This is all a bad dream, and soon I
’
ll wake up and realize what
’
s going on with me. I
’
ll wake up and find myself back at the ranch.
”

That sounded like a pleasant idea actually.
“
Yes,
”
she whispered in a dreamy voice.
“
This is a premonition of what
’
s to come if I don
’
t convince Brandon he needs me to stay there with him. He needs a cook anyway. I
’
m sure I can convince him to keep me around, even if it means I
’
m no longer his wife. I just have to wake up.
”

She glared at the dress again. It really was beautiful, but it was a reminder of the man she was supposed to marry, which didn
’
t please her. She repressed a shudder of disgust and began pacing again, her thoughts turning instead to Brandon.

Brandon. Her cowboy. Her tall, broad-shouldered, rugged cowboy. He was tall. He was gruff. He was everything Courtney had never experienced before. She remembered his heated gaze, the way he seemed to bare her soul with a single glance. She remembered the touch of his hand on her skin, the way he made her yearn for more with a single brush of his fingers. He remembered his taste, the way he
’
d kissed her until her breath was gone and she never wanted it to return if it meant he didn
’
t leave her.

A low, throaty moan escaped her throat at the memory of the way he
’
d taken her that first night. It was the one and only time a man had touched her in such a way, and while she
’
d never really thought of it before that moment, when it had happened, she had felt no shame, no guilt, nothing but need and desire. She
’
d enjoyed every minute of their tryst together, and if she could have had her way, it would have continued until the moment Paul picked her up to take her back to town.