Joshua Healy (Mitchell Healy Book 10) (10 page)

“I feel unequivocally special. Beyond words,” I say sarcastically.

Josh takes my hand and pulls me on top of him. We’re wrestling around in the sheets, him tickling me until I scream for him to stop. Then he’s hovering over me, those lime green eyes peering into my soul. My hands reach up and rest on each of his cheeks, his stubble tickling my palms. In that moment nothing matters. This is how he affects me. It’s how I know I can’t let this beautiful man slip away, not when I need this. I’m desperate, but not because I need some boyfriend void filled. It’s something else; something more powerful than I’m willing to wrap my head around.

Chapter 11

Joshua

I’d do anything to impress Tamsyn, and as much as that bothers me, it’s also another reminder that it’s time to grow up. She strips the bed of it’s sheets, while I grab her a new set to put on. While she’s focused on one task, I gather all of my dirty clothes, which is most of the mess, and take them to the laundry room. While downstairs, I gather some cleaning supplies and a broom, but lastly a trash bag. By the time I’m back upstairs, she’s putting clean cases on each pillow.

Tamsyn smiles when she sees my hands full of items that will get my room in top shape. I shake out the bag and put it over my head, pretending to suffocate myself like being made to do this is enough to warrant a suicide. When I don’t get the response I’m hoping for, I take it back off and begin picking up the packages, cans, and other trash in the room.

Not even ten minutes later it’s looking pretty damn good. Tamsyn has parked her sexy, petite body on my bed, and it’s distracting, to say the least. If I miss a spot, she points and orders me around. Normally I’d be taking the female home with plans on erasing her number as soon as her ass left the seat of my truck, but she’s an exception.

When I locate it, I toss her the remote control, so maybe she’ll be distracted from watching what I’m doing. She crosses her legs and begins searching the channels. When I hear screaming my focus turns to the screen. She’s watching a zombie flick and I’m already interested, so I slip in the bed beside her and rest my head on her lap. Her fingers play in my hair, and from this position I could fall asleep easily.

We’re quiet for most of the movie, but as soon as the credits roll she’s patting me to sit up. “Are we going to play the game or what?”

“You’re the one who turned on the movie.”

She rolls her eyes and points to the matching gaming chairs at the foot of my bed, which she can now see because they aren’t covered in laundry.

A few moments later we’re going at it, each of us being timed on our separate missions. When I’m doing better she opts to physically distract me, by climbing on my lap and grinding her ass around. As much as I’m into the game, she knows she’s messing with a ticking time bomb. I can only take so much humping before I lose my shit and have to have her.

The game is still on, but we’ve ditched our paddles. We’re rolling around on the floor, our clothes coming off quickly and scattering around the clean space. When she’s shirtless, I lift her body so that I’m able to savor each of her perfect breasts. She’s got her arms around my neck while I work, tiny sounds escaping her lips each time I suck on her hardened nipples.

We’re too distracted with each other to hear someone at my bedroom door. When I know it’s been opened, I quickly shield her from whoever is interrupting. “Do you mind?”

My mom spins so her back is turned to us. “Oh god! I didn’t know you had company. I just wanted you to turn the volume down on your game.”

Tamsyn locates my T-shirt and throws it on, patting her hair down as she tries to regain composure. With my pants unzipped, belt hanging, and no shirt on, I stand and reach for her to join me. My shirt looks like a dress, not that I’m worried. “Mom, you can turn around.”

She moves slowly, as if she’s worried she’s going to get another eye full.

“This is Tamsyn. Tamsyn, this is my mom, Amy.”

The girls say hello, but I can tell both are downright uncomfortable. “We were...”

“Joshua, I’m not naïve. Just keep it down, that’s all I ask.”

As soon as the door shuts I feel Tamsyn leaving my side. She’s sulking in the gamer chair, worried she’s made a terrible impression. “Don’t be like that,” I tell her.

“She hates me. She thinks I’m a whore. My god, I think I am too.”

I’m laughing at her assumption. “You’re not. My mom ain’t like that. You’ll see. By morning she’ll forget all about it.”

“I can’t face her. She’s probably telling your father you have a floosy in your room.”

It’s hard to keep a straight face when she’s being this irrational. “You’re not the first female she’s walked in on.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better or worse?”

I shrug. “You’re the one who wanted to get frisky.”

Her hands go up in the air. She’s pissed, and I can either calm her down, or prepare to drive her back to her dorm.

“Okay, that’s not fair. Look, I’m sorry. This whole dating thing is new to me. I’ve brought other women home before. I’ve never lied about the person I am, Tamsyn. I’m an adult. My mom has tits. It’s not a big deal.”

“It is for me,” she argues. “I don’t want to make a bad first impression. You may not care because in a week you’ll tire of me, but I could see her somewhere in the future and would like her to think of me as a good person, not some slut her son screwed around with for a while.”

I can see how that would be a problem for her. I clear my throat before attempting to make peace. “You’re right. You’re not like the girls I’ve brought home before. Get dressed and come downstairs when you have your things with you.”

“Wait? What? You want to take me home?” She thinks I’m rejecting her.

“Just do what I ask. I’ll explain when you come downstairs.”

While I leave her to get in a respectable condition, I locate my parents in the kitchen. Mom is doing some dishes while my father leans on the counter next to her facing me. “Hey,” I announce so I have both of their attention. “So, that new chick I’m seeing is sort of freaked out about the situation we were in. She’s worried you’ll think negatively toward her.”

“I don’t know her,” my mom admits. “Why would I be negative?”

“Just do me a favor and start over fresh. She’s about to come downstairs, and I know it’s late, but I need you both to formally meet her. It’s important to me.”

This gets both of my parents’ attention.

My dad is the first to respond. “Are we hearing you right, son?”

I smirk and shake my head. “Yeah, you are. Come into the living room with me and put on a smile. She’s a nice girl, better than I deserve.”

My parents follow me into the living room at the same time Tamsyn is coming down the stairs. The first thing I notice is that she has tears in her eyes, so I meet her before she’s at the bottom step. “Why are you crying?” I whisper.

“Because I screwed up and now you want me gone.”

I wipe her eyes with my thumbs and turn to face my awaiting parents. “Mom, Dad, this is Tamsyn, the woman I’ve been seeing.”

My mom walks over and takes Tamsyn by the hands. She’s smiling, friendly, but mostly doing her best to make her feel like she’s welcome. “We’re very happy to meet you.”

My dad is still in the same position. I can tell he’s had a few drinks while playing cards with the family. “What’s a pretty little thing like you hanging out with this guy?” He jokes.

She snickers. “He’s not that bad.”

“He cleaned his room, Conner. Give the guy a break.”

My dad chuckles while approaching Tamsyn. “Darlin’, if he cleaned his room for you, it must be serious. You kids have fun. I’m hitting the sack.”

Mom mother waits until he leaves to speak again. “Do you eat breakfast?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Good. If you stay the night, make sure you join us. It’s always a big to-do here on the ranch.”

“Oh, yeah, is it okay if she sleeps in Cammie’s room? She packed a bag in case it got too late for me to want to drive her back to campus.”

My mom is shocked. If I could pick her jaw up from the floor, I would. “Well, of course. The sheets are clean. I just put them on last week. Just make sure her bathroom has toilet paper.”

“Thank you. I won’t be any trouble,” Tamsyn explains.

“It’s my pleasure. See you both in the morning.”

When my mom passes by us she turns and gives me a thumbs up. I’ve never see this kind of response and wonder if it’s a show or she actually likes Tamsyn. At any rate, I think I’ve managed to make amends with my new lady friend.

I lace our fingers together. “How about we finish our game before bed?”

“I thought you were taking me home?”

“Do you want me to?”

She shakes her head.

“Good.”

Our second attempt at playing a video game in the same room ends the way the first did. We’re fully engulfed in a make out session for quite some time before we stop for air. “If we keep at this I’m going to ask you to sleep in here with me, and I’m really trying hard to be a gentlemen tonight.”

I’m on my gaming chair, with Tamsyn straddling my lap. My hands are down around her ass, while hers sit at the back of my neck. “Tell me something I don’t know about you, Josh.”

“I used to be a huge pot head in high school, and up until a couple months ago I was still doing it often.”

“What changed?”

“I don’t know. If it’s around I’ll have a couple hits, but it doesn’t work as good anymore. Maybe I’m immune.” I paused for a second. “What about you? Tell me something I don’t know yet.”

“Every man I’ve ever cared about has let me down, my father included.”

“Wow. Really?”

She nods. “Every boyfriend I’ve ever had cheated on me one way or another. Maybe I’m just a bad girlfriend.”

“Nah. I didn’t choose to spend time with you because you were the first person I came in contact with after making the decision. I think you’re great.”

“Give it time. You’ll change your mind eventually.” She yawns, but keeps talking. “I should probably head over to the other room now. It’s going to be morning soon.”

I check the clock and she’s right. It’s nearly three. “Time flies when you’re in my arms.”

She’s stroking my face, peering into my eyes. “Promise me this isn’t a game to you. Look me in the eyes and tell me that you’re not going to toss me out when someone better comes along. I’m not asking for a commitment. I just need to know I’m going into whatever this is with both eyes open. If it’s just sex then admit it. I might even be okay with it. It’s the not knowing that drives me nuts, Josh. I’m fully aware of how you live your life. I don’t expect you to change, but I do enjoy being with you.”

It’s hard for her to understand my way of thinking, because it’s not normal. I know I shouldn’t have problems committing, but for some reason I always have.

“Like I said before, I’m not seeing anyone else. If I’m anything it’s honest. I’ll tell you if something changes for me, but right now you don’t need to worry. You surprise me every single day with how much we have in common. I can’t remember getting along with a chick like we do.”

She’s finally smiling. “You think I’m totally cool, don’t you?”

“Just say you ride four-wheelers and I might blow a load right here and now.”

She leans close to my ears and whispers so it tickles. “I prefer dirt bikes.”

I’m a goner. She doesn’t know it yet, but she’s reeling me in without effort. This woman has come out of nowhere and she’s turning my life upside down, making me see there’s more to women than a fast fuck. There’s only one problem with knowing this; she’ll never be Liv, and I’m not sure if that’s a good thing, or one that could rip our new friendship to shreds.

Chapter 12

Tamsyn

He’s tucked me into the quiet room nearly a half an hour ago, but I can’t get comfortable, not when I know he’s right across the hall. The house is quiet, rain is coming down, with an occasional flicker of lightening across the field in the distance. I keep watching, wondering if I’ll ever be able to close my eyes.

A creaking sound catches my attention. I see a figure, tall and broad in the doorway. He’s standing there, watching, as if he’s waiting for a sign that I’m still awake. Before I can make a peep, he’s coming toward me in only his underwear, kneeling down so we’re face to face. “Hey,” he whispers. “You awake?”

“Yes.”

“I know we’ve decided to slow things down, but…” I’m already leaning over to kiss him. I can’t stand it. It’s impossible to be this close to him and not want more. Before I know it he’s pulling me from the bed, lifting me into his arms and carrying me, all while his lips continue to crash against mine.

He’s gentle when I’m placed in his bed and watch him enter from the opposite side. His warm body pulls me close, my back up against his hard chest. One arm comes around to lace with my fingers, as his lips coarse over my earlobe. “I’m getting hard. How do people sleep like this?”

I adjust so that I’m facing him, shove him flat on his back and proceed to move under the covers. He’s been generous with me, so it’s only fair if I level the playing field and take care of his predicament without it ending in intercourse. Like any man would, Josh doesn’t stop me from lowering. Instead, he pulls the sheet away so he’s able to watch what I’m doing. Even though we’ve been together before, this sort of exploration is new for me. I’m diving face first into uncharted waters, knowing darn well I’m not experienced enough for him to think it’s anything outstanding. With that being said, I’m determined to do my best, so against my better judgment, I take his thick shaft into my hand and start jerking it up and down. This is the easy part.

He’s already adjusting, playing with my hair so it’s out of my face, yet never taking his eyes off of what I’m doing. It’s not like I haven’t done this before; I have plenty of times, but Shaun never liked it. I’d do it until my cheeks were numb and he wouldn’t get off. My boyfriend before that asked for it all the time, so I hated it. Now I’m doing it without the request, and knowing his track record, I fear I’ll be nothing but a disappointment, giving him more reason to walk away.

I lick the tip, spread the saliva around the top of the shaft before taking it fully in my mouth. I suck and bob, repeating the process until I hear him making sounds like he’s into it. Josh holds my hair away from my face as I keep at it, stroking while moving to the same vigorous rhythm.

“Don’t stop,” he orders.

This gives me motivation, so I proceed, going at it, praying my cheeks won’t catch on fire from the friction. This goes on for minutes. I’m ready to take a break, or possibly try something new when I feel a change occurring within my hand. He’s forcing my head down now, I’m gagging, but taking more of his length, until it happens. His hot lava pours down my throat until he finally releases his hold on me. I keep my eyes closed and swallow before he’s out of my mouth to avoid the taste of his cum. I don’t want to embarrass myself by gagging, but fear it’s still going to happen.

Josh reaches over on the bedside table to fetch me a bottle of water. I take a few swigs and swish the last bit around to clean any remnants that could have been left behind. When I finish I close the bottle and smile back at him. “Feel better?”

He pulls me close again, kissing me on the head as he speaks. “You already know the answer. That was unexpected.”

Moments later, I’m nestled in his arms starting to fall asleep. His breathing has calmed, his heartbeat slowing. “Josh, if I’m not good at something will you tell me? I mean, I like that we can talk to each other. I feel like we’re friends.”

“Stop worrying about everything, Tamsyn. I think you’re great. Now go to sleep.”

The sun is shining when I feel him get out of bed. Out of panic, I sit up and wonder if I should rush into the other room. While admiring the rear view of Josh, he starts talking. “You should go back to sleep, Tamsyn. I’ll come wake you when breakfast is ready.”

“What about you? Will you come back to bed?”

He leans over and kisses me on the lips, with no regard for morning breath. “I’ve got some stuff to do. It’s Sunday. We have a big dinner and my parents are in charge of the meat tonight. Dad and I are smoking some prime rib. He’s been cooking it since last night.”

My mouth waters. “How much beef does your family eat?”

He chuckles. “Have you not noticed the cattle? We grow award winning steers. It’s only proper to keep some for ourselves.” He slips a boot on before finishing. “If you must know, we eat chicken more than anything else.”

“Are you sure I should go back to sleep? Should I offer to help your mom?”

“Na. She likes catering to guests. Besides, I like the fact that you’re still in my bed. I may have to take advantage of that when I come back.”

“What if your mom comes in while you’re gone? Maybe it’s best if I go back to your sister’s room.”

He halts me. “Nonsense. You’re fine, and I’m going to tell her I moved you to my room so you wouldn’t be disturbed. Oh, before I forget, I need to make sure you’re good with kids.”

“Kids? Why?”

“Well you’re staying for the festivities, and there will be a shit ton of little ones tearing up the place.”

“Babies?” I ask.

“Yeah, why?”

“I love babies.”

He starts to leave, only to stop and turn around with a furrowed brow. “When you say you love babies, you’re not implying that you…”

“I’m on the pill, if that’s what you’re wondering. I’d like to wait to have my life in order before I think about being a parent. How about you? Any kids out there?” It sucks I haven’t thought to ask this before. I’d still date him if he did have a child out there somewhere.

“No kids for me.”

When he sees my expression he keeps on. “What? Don’t believe me?”

“You’re not exactly careful.”

He’s scratching his head. “Check the nightstand.”

“Huh?”

“Open the drawer.”

I do as he says, getting a shock when I see an entire case of condoms. He then reaches in his back pocket and tosses his wallet toward me. “Open it.”

He’s got two rubbers in different places. “I don’t get it.”

Josh puts a hat on backwards. He takes a second and then grins. “Sometimes I get carried away. It’s true. I need to be more careful. If you think we should cover up, then I will. I won’t be offended if my track record scares you.”

I’m sitting straight up in the bed now, and I know I won’t be able to fall asleep with this on my mind. “If I asked how many, would you be able to answer?”

“I think the better question would be, would you be able to look at me the same?”

I cover my mouth. “Is it that bad?”

He’s laughing. “I’m kidding. I can already tell you think it’s some astronomical number. Sure, I’ve picked up women for the sole purpose of getting laid, but I’ve also mentioned that I don’t have one-night stands. That being said, the number would surprise you, because it’s mostly with the same people. Does that make sense?”

Now I need that number. “So, would you say, twenty, fifty, or more like triple digits?” I’m wondering if I need to make an appointment at the clinic immediately if he answers high.

“Go with the first number, plus or minus a few.” He winks, before disappearing.

It’s not as bad as I thought.

When he’s truly gone I think about what he’s said to me. He’s so honest it’s scary. I’ve never had that before. As much as I want to be able to trust a man, it’s going to take a lot longer than a week’s time for it to happen. For now, I’m content, happy even. I feel lucky, hoping that there might be a chance for us. He wants me to meet his whole family. He’s talked about all of them in depth. I feel like I already know most. It’s still a bit overwhelming.

Against his wishes, I dress in different clothes and find my way to the kitchen. His mother Amy is sitting at the kitchen table looking at her phone. When she sees me she puts it down and gives me all of her attention. “Did you sleep well?”

“We stayed up too late playing video games.”

“Don’t tell me Josh made you play video games. That boy will never grow up.”

“I play actually. It’s something we do together,” I correct her.

“Really? Well that makes me happy.”

I shrug, feeling a bit shy, but open-minded. “I wondered if I could help cook breakfast? Josh said you have a huge dinner to make, and since he’s invited me to hang out, it’s the least I can do.”

She’s very pleased by me. The truth is written across her face like a neon sign. “I’m sorry, sweetie. I’m in a bit of shock. You must be doing something right with Josh. That’s all I’m going to say.”

“I know he’s had quite of few…um.”

“He’s very popular. He gets those looks from his daddy. It’s not his fault. Plus he’s the baby. He’s the youngest of all the cousins, so he’s spoiled beyond belief. I’m paying for that now.”

“He’s been kind to me.”

“Good. You might just be exactly what that boy needs to get his act together. You’re definitely a good influence. He’s been walking around with a smile for the past week, and usually he’s hotheaded and starting with his father.”

“I can’t take the credit. We’re friends.”

“I had a friend once,” she starts. “Twenty some years later and he still makes the earth shatter.” She winks afterwards, as if I’m supposed to get the innuendo.

I hear her loud and clear, but fear she’s going to get her heart broken when or if things don’t work out with me and Josh.

He was right about one thing. She didn’t make me feel uncomfortable, and for that I’m grateful.

After our first chat, the conversation between Amy and I got a lot more relaxed. She gave me a rundown of what to expect when the whole family showed up later, and also spoke of her excitement to have all of her children together after several months of scheduling preventing it to happen. Josh's sister Cassie is a detective and her new husband is now an FBI profiler. Amy explained that their hours are crazy. She spoke highly of her daughter Cammie, who now has two children and a degree in internal medicine. Callie cuts hair with her mom occasionally, but stays home for the most part since her husband recently got a promotion with his new company. Instead of working for the government, he's put his skills to use and manages a crop production crew. I'm not exactly sure what it means, but they must do okay. During our conversation I got the inclination that she wanted more for Josh. Sure, he'll always be set with a job, but I could tell she wants him to have his own life aside from the ranch.

I also feel like I’ve entered into his life when he’s at a crossroads, and I’m not sure if that’s a good thing, or terrible.

A bit later, the four of us are sitting at the large kitchen table enjoying breakfast. Amy has made a huge spread including pancakes, two meats, potatoes and biscuits.  They each watch me taking my first few bites. Amy sips at her coffee, while the men dig in. I keep looking at Josh with that fitted baseball hat sitting backwards and he’s every bit of or even possibly more sexy than he is without one. When he smiles and those sugar bowl dimples fill his cheeks I’m in awe.

His father is quick to start up a conversation with me. “So, Josh tells me you’re in college.”

“Yeah. I’ve changed my major a couple of times, but hopefully I’ll be finished in the next year or two, depending on my course selections next semester.”

“Do you know what you want to do?”

“I think I want to teach.”

“Wow, that’s admirable. Good for you. We’ve only had one child graduate college, and she has a tough time. Do you have help paying for it?”

I look from Josh to his father. They’re so similar. Those eyes. My god they both have them. It’s crazy.

“My parents help me out, and I work part-time at my father’s dealership. I have some student loans that pay for half of my boarding. I’ll probably be paying them back for the next twenty years, but it will be worth it.”