Jo Goodman (29 page)

"Side?" Colin asked. "There are no sides here. There is a need for amends to be made, and Decker is agreeing to marry you." Colin looked significantly at his brother again, but Decker was not as easily removed as Mercedes. Perhaps Jonna is right, Colin thought. He might be acting less like a friend to these two and more like the pompous ass she had called him. "Sit down, both of you." He sighed. "Please."

Decker was the first to yield ground. He returned to his seat and gave Jonna the opportunity to come to her own decision. She knew he wouldn't bar her way again. Turning slowly, obviously reluctant, Jonna found the wing chair again and sat.

It was Colin who broke the tense silence. "Decker told me you would not accept his offer. I find myself confused by that. Most women, once compromised, would be grateful."

Jonna could do nothing about the heat that flushed her cheeks. The warmth was at odds with the ice around her heart and the frost in her violet eyes. "Do you intend to be so insulting, Colin, or is it simply a happy accident? I am not 'most women.' There was a time when you would have taken some pride in that, a time, certainly, when you didn't see me so differently from yourself. Why, then, must I be grateful for your brother's proposal? In what way have I been compromised? I hold the same beliefs and values I did the previous day. I am still the head of Remington Shipping. Papa... Jack... even you, Colin, warned me to be wary of offers of marriage. I know it's my money that draws a man's attention." She ducked her head and missed the look that Colin and Decker exchanged over it. "I've turned down Grant Sheridan for years. Why should I treat Decker's offer any differently?"

"Sheridan never bedded you," Colin said bluntly. As if he'd had an afterthought, one brow kicked up. "Did he?"

It was Decker, not Jonna, who answered. "No," he said. "There's never been anyone else."

Jonna's heart was slamming in her breast. "Did Decker tell you he seduced me? Is that what he said?" She felt bubbles of hysterical laughter touch her lips. "It wasn't like that. Not at all. I'm the one who—"

Decker leaned forward and drew Jonna's attention to him. "It's no good, Jonna. I already told Colin that you would lie to protect your fortune at the expense of your reputation."

"You may be carrying Decker's child," Colin said. "Have you considered that?"

Jonna felt cornered. It was as if they were physically pushing her deeper into the large brocade chair. Her large eyes darted between the two of them, and she saw no compromise in their expressions. It was of little comfort that she saw no triumph either.

"Decker wants no part of your fortune," Colin said. "He is quite—"

Decker caught his brother's eye and made a small negative shake of his head. "I am quite willing to sign an agreement allowing you to keep your trust your own."

Jonna's eyes widened. She looked at Colin. "Can that be done?"

Colin nodded. "Something can be prepared. You will not have to turn over control of Remington Shipping. Does that ease your mind?"

"I don't know," she said softly, thoughtfully. "I never considered such a thing." Her eyes darted to Decker again. "It would all remain mine? You'd own none of it?"

"None of it," Decker repeated.

He wanted nothing from her, nothing except the knowledge that he had kept her away from Colin. Jonna understood that all of Decker's maneuvering had been prompted by her lie. Even now, faced with these consequences, Jonna was honor bound not to reveal the truth about her great clipper. That truth was meant for only one man, and he wasn't in this room with her. She pressed her lips together to keep from saying his name aloud.

"I may not be carrying your child," Jonna said. She knew it had no relevance one way or the other. It wasn't why he wanted to marry her. She parroted Colin's question to her. "Have you considered that?"

Decker tempered his smile. Jonna would have understood that he felt a certain victory over her in this moment, but Colin would not. "I would make the same offer," he said. He glanced at his brother. "I suspect Colin would insist."

Jonna nodded. It did not surprise her that Decker had somehow engaged Colin in believing that he was acting in her best interests. Colin may have even been the one to suggest it. "Is this true, Colin? Would you insist?"

"I would."

"I suppose it has something to do with the fact that you fished me out of Boston Harbor." Her attempt to say it lightly failed. There was a trace of sadness in her tone. "You have always felt unaccountably responsible for me because of that."

Colin's dark eyes grazed her face. "And never once has it been a burden," he said gravely. "Your mother and father were kind to me, Jonna. So much of what I have is because of their guidance. Seeing to your welfare is the very least I can do. It's not a matter of repayment to them but out of sincere affection for you. Can you doubt that I care very much what turn your future takes?"

Jonna lowered her head. Tears hovered very close to the surface, and her throat was constricted. She wasn't prepared for Colin to cross the room and pull her out of the chair and into his arms. She pressed her face against his jacket and wept. Neither of them was aware that Decker left the room.

* * *

Three days later in the chapel at Weybourne Park, Jonna and Decker were married. The vows were witnessed by Colin and Mercedes and their children. It was not lost on the newlyweds that those in attendance found more joy in the occasion than they did themselves. There was a wedding breakfast served afterward, and Jonna did her best to fix a bright smile. It faltered only when Decker looked in her direction. She found herself longing to see his careless grin.

The bride and groom did not return to Rosefield. Upon leaving Weybourne Park they went to London and boarded
Huntress.
Decker put the word out that they were married, and he and Jonna received the congratulations of the crew. She retired to their cabin hours before he did, and was asleep before he joined her.

The moonlight was sufficiently bright to guide Decker about the cabin. He had no need to light a lamp and disturb Jonna's rest. He wondered that she didn't wake when he entered the cabin. He had not been particularly quiet until he saw she was sleeping.

She lay on her side, facing him, one arm curved in front of her protectively, the other supporting her head. Her heavy black hair was confined in a thick braid that fell across her shoulder and curled around her neck. Her lashes fanned out darkly, and they emphasized the shadows under her eyes. Her lips were slightly parted; each breath came deeply.

Where he had only noticed a wan smile and a brittle temper, he now recognized the exhaustion that had forced those things on her. Jonna's nights of late, it seemed, had been as restless as his own.

Decker finished undressing. Jonna occupied the near edge of the bed, and he had to climb over her to get in. He managed to do so without disturbing her and then slipped under the covers naked. She smelled of lavender. The fragrance wafted from her hair and skin as she turned with childlike confidence toward him. Never waking, she settled into a position that was agreeable to her, her arm wedged warmly between them and one of her knees solidly against his thighs. He didn't move her away. It occurred to him that one of them should be comfortable.

Decker moved her braid, pulling it away from her throat. The unsecured end of it unraveled in his hand and he rubbed the silky strands between his fingertips. The light scent of lavender stirred his senses again.

Today, when they had exchanged vows, he and Jonna had spoken more to each other than they had in any day since Colin had brokered their marriage agreement. This morning they had plighted their troth. This evening, after accepting the best wishes of the crew, they stood alone on the bridge of the clipper and Jonna quietly told him how much he was despised. It was the very calm of her words, the lack of animation in her cool expression, which lent credibility to her statement.

Decker closed his eyes. It was easy to imagine Jonna in Colin's arms again, weeping at the prospect of a forced marriage to the wrong brother. At least she had not wept today when Colin had held her. She had proffered her cheek for his affectionate kiss and had managed a tolerably warm smile, then, stepping away, had gone into the arms Mercedes extended toward her, and nothing about her expression had changed. The only real emotion Decker had seen was when Jonna was with the children. Emma and Elizabeth, one towhead, one with hair like midnight, crowded around Jonna and tugged her skirt, begging for their share of attention. Jonna had bent, kissing each one in turn, then hugging them both to her at once. She was easy with them now, unafraid that young Elizabeth was too fragile to hold or that she wouldn't see Emma underfoot. Decker had entertained a fleeting vision of Jonna with her own children—
his
children.

He bent his head slightly, his forehead almost touching hers. Moonshine cast a pale silver light over them. She looks angelic, he thought, wearing moonlight like a halo. He wished she hadn't worn a shift to bed. He wanted to pull back the covers and see all of her bathed in the translucent glow.

She unfolded her legs. Her knee brushed his groin. He was already hard, and the movement of her leg against him was exquisite torture. Decker wanted to be inside her. He wanted to be between her open thighs, moving in her, taking pleasure, giving it.

Decker's hand found the hem of her shift. He gathered it slowly, letting it slide upward over her calves, her knees, and finally her thighs. He laid his palm on her hip. Her skin was warm. The caress of his fingertips was like a whisper across her skin. She sighed in her sleep. The sheer contentedness of that small sound made Decker smile.

Edging closer, he kissed her lightly on the mouth. Her lips moved under his. Encouraged, Decker pressed again. The tip of his tongue traced her upper lip. This time she made a small humming sound.

"Jonna?" He said her name softly, tentatively. She moved, lifting her thigh across his legs so that her own were parted. A single thrust of his hips would have put him inside her. Except to kiss the corner of her mouth, Decker didn't move.

She raised her arms. Her hands slid across his chest and came to rest on his shoulders. She ducked her head a fraction and nuzzled the curve of his neck. Her cheek lay warmly on his skin. Through the fabric of her shift he could feel the tips of her breasts. He palmed her bottom, then let his hand slide upward to the small of her back. She shivered lightly.

"Jonna." Although his voice was still quiet, this time there was nothing hesitant in the way he said her name.

Her mouth stirred against his skin, and she pressed a kiss to his throat. She did not really want to be awake. It would have been easier to accept that her body was responding in spite of her conscious wish that it might be otherwise. He could have had her if he was as willing to pretend as she was. Under her shift his hand moved again, trailing up her spine and then across her rib cage. He cupped the underside of her breast, his thumb making a pass across her nipple. She could not hide her response any more than he could hide his. It was then she realized he could have her anyway.

"I want you, Jonna."

There were any number of ways she could have answered him. What she did was to place her hand over the hard, hot length of him and guide him into her. "This only means you can make me want you," she whispered. Her hips thrust forward, and he was joined to her deeply. "Nothing's changed."

It seemed important to her to believe that, and Decker let it go unchallenged. As she turned on her back, he followed her with his body. Her thighs pressed his hips on either side, and her arms slid around his back. He kissed the corner of her mouth, her jaw. She arched under him. Where their bodies were joined her muscles contracted and she held him tightly. Her breasts were flattened against his chest. His skin rubbed hers deliciously and the friction raised heat along her arms and legs. Her fingers curled around his shoulders. His flesh was marked by small crescents where her nails scored him.

They shared both hunger and a sense of urgency. Their mouths touched fleetingly, then clung. He moved in her. She moved around him. He watched her face, watched her mouth part, saw her tongue touch her upper lip. She sipped the air, and when he lowered his head, she sipped his skin. He felt her teeth tug. Tension stretched his legs taut, and he pushed inside her deeply. Their rhythm changed. Her head tilted back as heat rippled through her. She closed her eyes.

He didn't ask to hear his name. She said it without prompting and without embarrassment, naked in her need. He held her closely as she cried out her pleasure. Her body shuddered under his, and he absorbed the vibration until her release was part of him. His thrusts quickened. His face lay in the curve of her neck. She said his name again, this time against his ear. Her breath ruffled his hair. Raising himself up just once, he spilled into her.

Jonna waited for the feeling of regret to wash over her. It never did. She expected some sense of remorse for having found this guilty pleasure. There was none. She reasoned it was the same with him.

It wasn't, but she couldn't know that. There was no apology from Decker as he rolled away from her, only silence. It mattered to him that she still lied to herself, that she was convinced he could somehow make her want him. That wasn't in his power and he knew it, even if she refused to accept it. If she had told him to stop he would have. There was nothing he wanted from her any longer that wasn't given freely, and the next time they lay so intimately coupled it would be because she initiated it.