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Authors: Taboo

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N
athan rubbed his temples as the incessant noise went on and on around him, filling his mind with ceaseless chatter, making his ears ring with empty words. How could three women talk so endlessly about bonnets?

He looked up with a weak smile as his aunt thumped her hand on the arm of her chair and snapped, “Nathan!”

“Yes, Aunt Bethany?”

“You seem distracted, are we boring you?” She eyed him with a look of complete mischief and Nathan’s eyes widened. The old bat was
enjoying
tormenting him, after all. He almost laughed at the realization.

“Of course not, Aunt,” he said with an innocent tilt of the head. “In fact, all this talk about clothing and bonnets has put me to mind of a wonderful idea.”

“What’s that, Nathan?” his sister Lydia asked, taking a dainty sip of her tea. At nineteen and in her second season, Lydia was still mindful of everything she did and said. Nathan had caught her practicing her responses to being asked to dance more than once.

Unlike his other sister, Adelaide. Though she was just a year older than Lydia, she had much more experience with the world of the
ton
. In fact, she had refused one proposal already, much to the chagrin of their mother.

“Yes, do tell what could have possibly interested you about bonnets,” Adelaide said with a light laugh.

“The last time I was here, Aunt Bethany had a guest, if you recall.”

Nathan swallowed, trying not to remember in full detail his reaction when he had seen Cassandra for the first time in so long. How much anger, pain, and pure desire had coursed through him.
Still
ripped through his veins like acid whenever he was near her.

“A seamstress, I believe,” he continued, measuring his tone and expression carefully so that none of the women would recognize how bloody important this was to him. “Miss Willows, I think her name is?”

His aunt nodded enthusiastically. “Yes! Best
modiste
in London by far, that one.”

“And Mama refuses to allow us to have a gown from her,” Lydia said with a pout.

Nathan couldn’t have asked for a better opening. “Yes, I recall that. I also recall how much you two seemed to desire
such a gown from the lady. Since I have returned, you have both been such good and caring sisters—”

“Because we have missed you so terribly, Nathan,” Adelaide interrupted, pressing his hand briefly with her own.

He smiled and it was not forced. “And I missed the two of you. To show my gratitude, I thought perhaps
I
could arrange for a gown to be made, one for each of you, by Miss Willows. So as to not upset Mother, perhaps you would allow the seamstress to do her fittings here, Aunt?”

As his sisters let out twin squeals of delight and started chattering to each other and singing his praises, all without drawing breath, Nathan waited. If his aunt wouldn’t agree to Cassandra working here, this would never work. His mother certainly wouldn’t invite his lover into her home. And somehow he doubted that Cassandra would wish to go there and face the two people who had spoken out so passionately against her all those years ago.

His aunt eyed him for a long moment, her hawkish gaze piercing so fully that he feared she might have guessed his deeper connection with Cassandra. But finally she shrugged one slender shoulder.

“I don’t see that as a problem. I think it’s ridiculous that your mother refuses to use Cassandra Willows. I must keep needling her reason out of her.”

Nathan shut his eyes briefly. God, if his aunt ever
did
uncover the truth, that would be a nightmare in itself.

“I can’t speak to that, I’m afraid,” he murmured, avoiding the direct lie as carefully as he could. His aunt might pick up
on any deception, she had always been good at that. “But I assume from all your screaming and jumping that you girls would be amenable to the idea of having Miss Willows make dresses for you?”

His sisters lunged toward him in tandem, nearly knocking him down as they hugged him, chattering at once about silks and satins and waistlines.

“Good,” he said with a laugh, as they finally released him from their surprisingly strong grips and returned to their seats to put their heads together and giggle. “Though I would recommend we don’t tell Mother until your gowns are finished.”

The girls nodded their heads, as did his aunt.

“Aunt Bethany, could you contact the lady?”

His aunt looked up at him with renewed surprise. “I gave you her direction a few weeks ago, did I not? I assumed you had already made some kind of contact and arrangement with her.”

Nathan bit back a curse. She
had
passed along Cassandra’s information to him, hadn’t she? Well, there was no way to tell her that he had used it to blackmail Cassandra into his bed rather than to discuss fine satin with her. So he shrugged.

“I’m afraid I misplaced the card in all the excitement of the last few weeks. And I think since you two already have a working relationship of sorts that she might be more open to a sudden request for a fitting from you rather than from a man she…”

He hesitated. He couldn’t exactly say “didn’t know” or “hadn’t met,” could he?

“Yes, yes, I suppose you are correct,” his aunt said with a fluttering, dismissive wave of her hand. “I will send word to Miss Willows directly and let you know when she will meet with the girls here.”

Nathan nodded, filled with relief. But as the women returned to their talking, he paced to the window to look out on the street below. His plans for Cassandra were coming together now. Now he could only hope that she would accept his aunt’s request.

 

Cassandra trudged up the stairs to Lady Bethany Worthington’s home, her shoulders rolled forward and her steps sloppy. As much as she tried to deny and hide it, her exhaustion was overwhelming.

Since the last time she and Nathan had been together, she had hardly slept. Four long nights of working until her fingers ached…and then tossing and turning in her cold bed while she thought of Nathan. The war between them for control. But mostly she thought of their renewed passion. Somehow she hadn’t thought the connection to him could be deeper or more powerful than it had been years ago when she first loved him.

But it was. Time had altered them both and now the passion was deeper, the emotion sharper.

It was dangerous. She didn’t want it, and she had to find a way to stop wanting him, but judging from his avoidance of her ever since she ran away from him, perhaps that wouldn’t be
an issue anymore. Of course, every time she began to believe she was free, Nathan found a way to barge back into her life.

At the door, she stood up a bit straighter and smoothed her gown carefully. She had been surprised to be summoned to Lady Worthington’s home, but unable to refuse. Nathan’s aunt was too powerful and influential a lady to ignore. She only hoped the woman wouldn’t want to talk about her nephew and his pursuit of a bride while Cassandra measured her. There was a great deal she could take, but today that topic was not one she cared to broach.

The door opened after she knocked, revealing Lady Worthington’s tall, stern butler. The man didn’t speak as Cassandra gave her name, but merely motioned her down the hallway toward the parlor where Cassandra could hear Lady Worthington talking to someone.

Wonderful, the old bat had company. That only increased the possibility that Nathan would be a subject of conversation. From what Cassandra had gleaned from other clients, the man was the talk of London, with everyone desperate to know when he would take a bride and who the lucky lady might be.

As the butler announced her, Cassandra did her best to put a bright smile on her face. Lady Worthington was sharp enough that she might notice Cassandra’s tiredness and demand an explanation. Or worse, spread news of it around town and possibly limit her clients.

“Come in, my dear,” Lady Worthington said in that sharp-as-a-knife tone of hers that left no room for refusal. “You are late.”

Cassandra tilted her head in deference as she entered the room. “I do apologize, my lady. I’m afraid I lost track of time while working on a…”

She stopped. What she had been working on that morning was a highly polished set of sensual balls that could be slipped inside a woman’s body for pleasure and to build the inner muscles of her sheath. Not exactly a fact she could share with Lady Worthington.

“On a project,” she finally finished with a vague wave of her hand.

“Hmph.” Lady Worthington motioned behind Cassandra. “Have you met my great-nieces?”

Cassandra stilled before she slowly turned and faced the two girls who were perched on the settee behind her.

Great God, Nathan’s sisters.

The girls had been young when she and Nathan had carried on their affair and she had only glimpsed them from afar once while riding with their brother. Now they were young women, both in the bloom of their beauty. Both with Nathan’s bright blue eyes.

Cassandra almost choked, but managed to remain calm.

“Lady Adelaide and Lady Lydia, I believe?” she said, pretending to search for their names when in reality they were right on her lips.

The girls leaped up and both began talking at once. They praised her designs and even complimented her on the pretty dress she was wearing. Cassandra smiled and this time it wasn’t forced. There was no denying the fresh, innocent
charm of the sisters. They flattered her with their kindness, but she was full-aware that all that would likely fade away if the two young women realized what kind of relationship she had once shared with their exalted brother. Or the one she shared with him now.

The kindness of the
ton
only stretched so far as long as one stayed in one’s place. Dare to reach for more and all the sweetness and friendliness would vanish in an instant. She had learned that the hard way, most certainly.

“Girls!” Lady Worthington snapped, and the two fell instantly silent.

Cassandra turned back to their aunt, who was rolling her eyes at their girlish excitement. She couldn’t help but smother a laugh. Lady Worthington might be a terrifying old woman, but she was also direct and quite enjoyable. Cassandra actually looked forward to the day when she was advanced enough in age and settled enough in fortune that she could do whatever she damned well pleased. Lady Worthington was certainly an excellent role model for such a life.

“What is it that I can do for you, Lady Worthington?” she said through her laughter.

“Not for me, my dear, though I am so looking forward to seeing my gown.”

Cassandra nodded. “I will have it finished in three days’ time and bring it by for you the afternoon of the twelfth, if that is satisfactory.”

“Perfect!” The older woman clasped her hands together.
“And perhaps, if you work very quickly, you could also bring two more gowns with you at the same time.”

Cassandra couldn’t help it. Her smile fell and she swallowed reflexively. God, two more gowns? She was already overrun as it was.

“Two more?” she repeated, her voice weak.

Lady Worthington tilted her head as if she heard Cassandra’s exhaustion, but continued on, “I asked you here today because someone would like for you to make a gown for each of my nieces.”

Cassandra tossed a look at the excited girls and then back to Lady Worthington in confusion. “
Someone
?”

It sure as hell wasn’t their parents. Lord and Lady Herstale had made it perfectly clear that they thought Cassandra was worth less than the dirt on their shoes.

Suddenly, the realization of the truth hit her and Cassandra found herself reaching for the back of the nearest chair to keep herself upright. As if on cue, Nathan strode through the door, a secretive smile on his handsome face. He bent to kiss his aunt’s cheek.

“So sorry I was late, Aunt, I got caught up in a conversation with Lord Smythe-Gray at the club. A windbag, that one,” he said.

His aunt smiled indulgently. “A windbag who is angling for you to court his daughter.”

For the first time, Nathan shot a brief, almost apologetic look her way, but Cassandra forced herself to turn her head. She fought her jealousy. After all, she was fully aware that Na
than was on the lookout for a bride. A “proper” one, as he had sneered at her only a few weeks ago. Cassandra had designed a very beautiful dress for Lady Eliza Smythe-Gray a few weeks ago and had found her to be everything a lady should be.

Everything Cassandra was not.

The very pretty girl would certainly make a fine Countess for him. The sooner Nathan found his bride, the sooner he would end his pursuit of her. She was happy if he was courting. And eventually her heart would accept what her head already knew, she was certain.

“Hello Lydia, Adelaide,” he said around Cassandra, ignoring his aunt’s comment about the apparent designs of Lord Smythe-Gray.

The girls said their hellos in unison and Nathan shook his head with a kind smile that touched Cassandra’s heart. He had always loved his younger siblings. It seemed that, if nothing else, had remained the same about him.

“As my aunt has said, Miss Willows,” he said, finally turning his attention toward Cassandra. “I would greatly like for you to design a gown for each of my sisters. They have long desired one of your creations, and I believe in indulging one’s desires when one can.”

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