Jersey Girl (Sticks & Hearts #1) (15 page)

I open Spotify and soon James Bay's voice fills the cab of my truck. I'm about to shoot off a reply when my phone rings in my hand and I answer without checking to see who it is.

"I was just thinking about you." My face nearly splits in two from the smile stretching across it. It's been a long ass day and I know she can make me laugh.

"Well, isn't that what every mother wants to hear from her handsome son. How are you darling? You sound tired."

Would someone please explain to me how a mom can pick up on that shit?

"Mom, hey. How are you? How's dad doing? Last I talked to him he sounded well." I throw my truck in gear and pull out into traffic. It's after seven on a Thursday, but for some reason the traffic on State Street is still bumper-to-bumper.

"Your dad is doing really well. The doctors are impressed with how well his recovery is going. But you know how he hates being idle. Missing work has really put him in a foul mood, which is the reason for my call."

"Here I thought you just wanted to hear your baby boy's voice," I say in a teasing voice, making her laugh.

"Oh, darling, you know how true that is, but I must admit I'm calling for purely selfish reasons. What are the odds you can find somewhere to go during Thanksgiving break? I only ask because I've gone behind your father's back and booked us a getaway. I know the timing is poor, but given recent circumstances, I think it will do us some good. Maybe it will remind us of how things used to be." I can hear the desperate plea in her voice, and even though I don't have a freaking clue where I'll end up spending the day, I don't have the heart to crush her spirits.

"I'm fairly certain I know of a family or two who'd be willing to feed another mouth. I'm glad to hear you and dad are getting away. I can't remember the last time you did something like that for yourselves. But aren't you worried about dad not getting his fill of sweet potato casserole?"

"I've already got it covered. The hotel we're staying in is preparing a complete Thanksgiving feast for their guests, and it's a buffet. Your father will be in sweet potato heaven, though I may have to remind him to control himself, seeing as how he did just have open heart surgery," she laughs, and I welcome the sound. The last few times we've spoken, I could hear the strain the in her voice, though I know she worked hard to hide it. "Thank you for understanding. I hated the thought of calling, but the timing worked out perfectly. His office is closed that week anyway, so he won't feel guilty about not being there. I want you to promise you'll be home for Christmas. This may be the last year we get to see you once you become famous."

"Come on, mom. I'll never be too famous for my family," I answer honestly. "Besides, I'd be a fool to pass up your Christmas morning hugs. Hey, where's dad? Can I talk to him?"

"He fell asleep on the sofa just before I called, and I don't want to wake him just yet. Why don't you try calling back in the morning? Listen, I better go, sweetie. We love you."

"Yeah, love you guys too. I'll try calling tomorrow, but I can't make any promises. I have an early practice." I end the call on a sigh, not in the mood to think about Thanksgiving when October has barely begun. Pulling into the driveway, I cut the engine and pull open my messages.

Me: It's not wrong. I miss u 2.

I dance through the shower, then lie on my bed to read a few chapters in my econ book. Two pages later and my mind drifts from what I'm reading. Hearing mom's voice brought everything I'd been trying to suppress back to the surface. Even though mom seems perfectly content on acting as if nothing happened, I can't seem to shake the heavy weight crushing against me. Dad and another woman? Trying to picture my dad with anyone besides mom just feels weird. Would he really cheat on her? And if so, why? I want to ask these questions, but I never seem to get him on the phone for longer than five minutes. Maybe mom's been running interference so I'm not able to corner him. But the thought of asking him over the phone doesn't sit well either. No, these are questions that should be asked and answered face-to-face. That way, I can look him in the eye when he responds. Now that I won't be going home for Thanksgiving, it will have to wait another month, and by then it may start to feel like old news to them. They'll have moved on while I'm still holding onto misplaced hatred. No, hatred isn't quite the word I would use. Too harsh. But I do have resentment because, no matter how you look at it, if he stepped out of line in any way, I'm afraid it may rock the pedestal I've kept him on all these years.

I'm afraid maybe it already has.

I don't know how long I've been asleep before the phone starts ringing. "Hello?" My voice is thick with sleep, and I cover the phone with my hand to clear my throat.

"I'm so sorry I woke you. Just call me tomorrow," she blurts and I have to work fast to catch her before she ends the call.

"Wait, I want to talk. How are you? I've missed you." It feels weird saying the actual words out loud, but they're true. And now that they're out there, I can't take them back, not that I want to. We haven't seen each other much this week, and right now, I could really use a friend.

"B? Are you okay? Your voice sounds funny."

"I'm okay. Wait... I mean, not really." I try to compose myself. I felt fine until I heard the concern in her voice. Knowing she's out there worried about me does weird things to my head. "It's my dad. He had a heart attack after I got back from Traverse City."

"And you're just now telling me? Is he okay?"

"Honestly? I'm not sure. And that's not even the worst of it. Mom suspected he'd been having an affair and—" That's as far as I get before she cuts me off.

"Stay right where you are. I'll be right there." The call ends abruptly, and I'm left holding the phone to my ear as if waiting for her to pick it back up and tell me she was only kidding. Fifteen minutes later, there's a soft knock on my door, and when I open it, she falls into my tired arms.

"Oh, honey. I'm so sorry." Her blue eyes peer up at me, and for the first time since we've met, I'm not looking at her with lust or longing. All I see is someone who dropped everything to be with me because she sensed I needed a friend. Holding her in my arms feels so nice it makes me wonder why I haven't opened up sooner. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

I don't respond with words. I simply nod my head, and she guides me over to the bed and crawls in beside me. With her back against the headboard, she pulls me in so my head is on her shoulder. She strokes my hair and speaks in a low, soothing voice.

"What happened?" I open my mouth, and before I know it, I've told her everything I know, which isn't a whole lot. "But his surgery went well and he's recovering? How's your mom holding up? This must be difficult for her. I can't imagine watching someone I love go through something like that."

My arms circle her waist to pull her close. There's barely an inch between us, but I can't seem to get close enough. She seems to know exactly what I need before I have to ask.

"When we talk, she sounds normal, but I'm sure it's been hard as hell. My dad doesn't handle sitting still very well. I'm sure he's driving her crazy, but you wouldn't know it from talking with her. I don't get it, you know? If she suspected anything of an affair, how can she go from confronting him to taking care of him as if nothing happened? In my eyes, there's no excuse for any of it, and the excuses mom made for him sound like pure bullshit to me. He says he loves her, but, there was a brief period where he was questioning everything in his life. Screw that. In my opinion, if you're in love, then you're all in, there is no in-between."

She goes quiet for a few minutes, and when she finally speaks, I cling to her words as if they're a lifeline. "I suppose when you've been with someone a long time, it would be hard to walk away. Think about it, they promised to love each other through good times and bad. I'm sure after what, twenty-plus years, they've weathered a hell of a lot of storms together. No. When times get hard, you don't run away and seek shelter; you get right in there and sling a little mud if that's what it takes. I know I would fight for the man I loved, no matter how messy things got. She probably forgave him, because that's what love does to you. You love not only when there's laughter, but also when there's pain. I'm certain she feels after this long she's earned the right to stay by his side, and I hope he realizes how fortunate he is to have a woman like that."

"So you're saying I should forgive him even if he made a mistake? That I love him no matter what?"

"Yeah, B, that's exactly what I'm saying." Her finger slips below my chin, lifting my face to hers. "I'm not saying it will be easy, but he's your father, and whatever it is he's going through, it sounds to me like he needs his family now more than ever."

I bury my face in her shirt, silently crying as I try and absorb the words she's just spoken. She's quiet now, waiting for me to say something, but allowing me to do it on my own terms. There's safety in the friendship we've formed. A sense of freedom I've never experienced with another human being outside of my parents. I'm not sure how it happened; all I know is I like it, and I find myself wanting to cling to it for as long as she'll let me.

"Stay with me. I don't want to be alone tonight." She smiles and without a word gets up and uses the bathroom to change into one of my T-shirts. I like seeing her in my clothes. I'm not sure why. I just do. On her way back to bed she makes sure to lock the door before shutting off the light and snuggling in beside me. With my face pressed up against her back, I breathe in the sweet fragrance of her shampoo and listen to the soft sounds of her even breathing. It's only after she goes quiet that I give in to the pull of sleep and enter a peaceful slumber while holding onto my best friend.

***

The next three weeks morph into much of the same.

Practice. Class. Time with Cassie.

Class. Practice. Time with Cassie.

It doesn't matter how the day starts, all that matters is they end the same. Spending time with Cassie has become my new normal. Whether together or simply talking on the phone, I always feel good when she's around.

"You want to catch a movie, or hang out in my room and practice some more?" I ask as we make our way toward the exit of the lecture hall. Two nights a week she's been meeting with me to have me play for her. I'm only a third of the way through the song, but last week she left Willow so I can practice on the nights she isn't giving me a lesson. She's a great teacher. Patient. Demanding without being harsh. And very thorough. She'll make me play the same chords over and over until she feels my movements are natural rather than forced. She says I'm a good student too, but that's probably due to the years of disciplined training I've had to endure for hockey season.

"I can't get together tonight. I already made plans with Roni. She complained you're monopolizing my time, so I gave in and agreed to go to a party with her." She links her arm with mine and gives me a sideways glance as we continue walking.

"Party? Which one? I haven't heard about any parties." I play along, knowing full well what 'party' she'll be attending. Her birthday is this weekend, but a bunch of us decided to surprise her by all meeting up at Rick's. Last week, Roni texted to fill me in on her plan, and before we knew it, Scott and Davis were in on the surprise. Roni has this grand plan to distract her before arriving at the bar much later tonight.

"Umm..." she stalls, and I can tell she's embarrassed to admit where she's going. “It's not that kind of party. She's taking me to a sex toy party," she mumbles the last part into her hand so I can't make out what she's just said. But I already know, so it's kinda funny.

"I'm sorry, I didn't hear that. What kind of party?" I turn my head so she doesn't see me smirk, and I have to make sure it's not present when I turn back around.

"A sex toy party," she shouts at the top of her lungs, and this draws the attention of several students. "What?" She throws her hand up in question, but they all turn away and keep walking. She turns to me and rolls her eyes, annoyed I made her admit it out loud. "Are you happy now?"

"Hmmm, let me see... Ask me later when I see what toys you've bought." I give her a teasing wink.

"Oh, you wish. I'm not planning on buying anything. I'm not even taking my wallet. I'll just be observing."

"I'll spot you twenty bucks if you're worried about wasting your own money," I offer happily.

"Brantley," she warns, and I concede by shutting my mouth and slipping a twenty in her front pocket. It really is fun to watch her blush.

***

Rick's is another venue where students congregate throughout the school year. For the most part, it's usually crowded on the weekends, but tonight is Wednesday so we have no problem finding a few available tables. Pulling them together to accommodate ten bodies, we situate the chairs and order a round of drinks. Davis is on my right, which also happens to be the direction the door is in, so while he goes on about some girl in his econ class, I listen and watch the door simultaneously.

Thirty minutes after we arrive, they walk through the door. I'm two beers in and finally starting to relax when she approaches the table and pulls back the seat I've been saving for her. The one right next to mine. The same one I've kept a watchful eye over since everybody and their neighbor kept trying to snag it. Now that she's here, I can let down my guard and kick back.

She takes a look around the tables, spying her closest friends, and immediately senses something is up.

"What's going on? Why are you all here on a Wednesday?" she asks skeptically.

"Surprise!" We all scream in unison. "Happy Birthday!"

"No way." She drops her face into her hands and shakes her head.

"Yes, way." I pull her hand away and give her a barely noticeable wink. Rivers is sitting two seats down and across from us, and I can feel him watching my every move. I lower my hand and raise my beer in a toast just as Ashley brings out a cake with twenty glowing candles. "Happy early Birthday, Dimples. I hope all your wishes come true." She smiles a smile that I'm sure is meant solely for me before blowing out all her candles in one breath.