Jasper and the Green Marvel (11 page)

32 How the Night Ended

‘So you’re telling us there was a ghost,’ said the policeman.

‘Two ghosts,’ said Mrs Haverford-Snuffley. ‘You see, in the first place, we went to the kitchen in the middle of the night because of a ghost. We’ve always known the house was haunted, and not long after I went to bed I was woken by a terrible howling. Mrs Knuttmegg heard it too and so she came to see if I was all right. She very kindly offered to make me a cocoa to help me get back to sleep and we went down to the kitchen together, because we were both very afraid. But it was only in the
garden that we saw the ghosts. Two of them,’ she said again.

‘And where are they now?’ the policeman asked.

‘I don’t know. They just sort of disappeared.’

‘Well, they would, I suppose, being ghosts,’ the policeman said sarcastically.

‘We’ve heard all this before,’ the policewoman muttered. ‘They’ll be telling us next there was a rolling pin involved.’

‘There was, actually,’ Mrs Knuttmegg said. ‘It belongs to me. That villain poked me and threatened me with my own rolling pin. Can you believe the cheek of it?’

They were all four gathered together in the drawing room of Haverford-Snuffley Hall. Mrs Knuttmegg and her employer were still in their night clothes, with Nelly now clinging to Mrs Haverford-Snuffley’s hairnet. Through the big windows they could see that the sky was pale, for dawn was breaking.

‘Well, it’s all over now,’ the policeman said.
‘The main thing is that your jewels are safe,’ and he nodded towards the table where the Green Marvel lay.

‘Yes, thank you so much. This is such a wonderful surprise. To think that the necklace was in the kitchen all along! But tell me, are you sure that that bad man won’t come back?’

‘He’s on his way to Woodford prison as we speak. They’ll have to give him a jolly good wash when they get him there. Talk about a stink! Buried in a compost heap and covered in bats. Never in all my years in the force have I seen such a thing.’

‘What happened to the bats?’ Mrs
Haverford-Snuffley
asked anxiously.

‘They flew away as soon as we got there,’ the policewoman said. ‘Went off in a big long line, two by two. Quite a sight it was. I might have been mistaken, but I thought they flew straight down one of the chimneys of this house. I’d see about that, if I was you, or else you’ll have an attic full of bats. Before you know where
you are, they’ll have settled down and made themselves at home, and who would want that?’

Mrs Haverford-Snuffley and Mrs Knuttmegg said nothing in reply, but they looked at each other and grinned.

‘Speaking of animals, that reminds me,’ the policeman said. ‘We found these two creatures at the scene of the crime. I don’t know what we’ll do with them. Horrible, they are.’

Gingerly he put his hand in the pocket of his jacket and pulled out … Rags and Bags.

‘Just look at them!’ he said in disgust, as he dumped them on the table beside the Green Marvel.

Mrs Haverford-Snuffley drew near and did just that. She looked at them for a long time, staring hard at their beady eyes and long tails, at their whiskers and their tatty fur.

‘Rats,’ she whispered. ‘Two rats. Goodness me, why, aren’t they just … ADORABLE!’

And to the astonishment of everyone else,
she swept them up in her arms and started to cuddle them. ‘Snooky-ooky ratty-watties! Mummy’s little cup-cakes! Who are the best little beasties in the whole wide world?’

I hope you don’t imagine for a moment that Rags and Bags were annoyed or embarrassed at all this baby-talk. They were absolutely chuffed, and went pink with delight under their fur.

Suddenly Mrs Knuttmegg spoke. ‘What’s that noise? A kind of squeaking sound, do you hear it?’

It was Nelly, of course. She had never heard anything funnier in her whole life, and was laughing so much she almost fell off the hairnet. 

33 The End

When the Green Marvel was sold at auction in the Woodford Saleroom, it was possibly the most exciting day the town had ever seen. The place was packed with people, and they all gasped with amazement when the necklace was held up for them to see. Never could they have imagined such jewels! The auction started and the price just kept on getting higher and higher. When the auctioneer finally banged on the table and cried ‘Sold!’ everyone in the room gasped again, and some shouted and even cheered, for the Green Marvel had been sold for a truly mind-boggling sum of money.

Now Mrs Haverford-Snuffley would be able to fulfil her dream.

Work started at the Hall soon afterwards. Stables were built, together with sties and byres. Hutches were bought, kennels and a great many perches and baskets, together with troughs, and dishes, toys and blankets. Before the year was out, the whole town gathered again for the grand opening of the
Haverford-Snuffley
Hall Animal Sanctuary.

It has been running for quite some time now and is a tremendous success. There are all sorts of animals: hedgehogs and donkeys; puppies and pigs; foxes and kittens; hamsters and goats. People who can offer a good home go there to choose a pet, but a great many simply go to visit the animals and to spend a happy afternoon. It’s the most charming place you can imagine and Mrs Haverford-Snuffley is immensely popular with everyone.

Mrs Knuttmegg has opened a tea-room for the visitors. She serves scones and apple pie
and shortbread and pastries, all home-baked and all delicious. So many people asked her for her recipes that she eventually published
Mrs
Knuttmegg’s Big Book of Baking
, which stayed at the top of the bestseller lists for months, much to her surprise and delight. The follow-up,
Mrs
Knuttmegg’s Dynamite Book of Dinners
, is due in the bookshops any day now.

Haverford-Snuffley Hall is still haunted, but in a good way. Sometimes in the night, singing and laughter can be heard coming from empty rooms. On occasion people walking in the gardens hear music, pure and sweet as the song of a bird. And even if they are feeling a little bit gloomy at the time, they feel better as soon as they hear the music, and in no time at all their hearts are overflowing with joy and happiness. Others even claim to have seen a ghostly couple walking in the garden, smiling and holding hands. The young man is dressed in soft brown clothes and has blond hair cut in a square fringe. The young woman wears
a billowing blue silk dress. She has white skin, a straight nose, and extraordinary green eyes. Her hair, which she wears piled up on the top of her head, is exactly the same beautiful red colour as the little squirrel that plays in the branches above their heads, and that the young woman sometimes coaxes down into her arms.

All the bats are still in the attic. Nelly is still hanging from a long feather on Mrs Haverford-Snuffley’s hat. And what of Rags and Bags? Mrs Haverford-Snuffley has made pets of them, and carries them around with her everywhere she goes, in a small basket. She is on a one-woman mission to persuade people that rats are actually rather nice, and can even be very lovable. I’m afraid she isn’t making much progress. People can be very fixed in their ideas, but no matter. Rags and Bags are well fed and well looked after. They have become healthy and plump and sleek, and are like brothers to Nelly. The rats couldn’t be happier, and they are thrilled to have Jasper out of their lives. 

And indeed, what about Jasper? Well, he’s back in prison, safely under lock and key for a long spell. When he arrived, he sulked and huffed for ages. But he won’t be in prison forever, and when he does get out I shouldn’t be surprised if he’s up to his old tricks again before long, making trouble and having all kinds of mad adventures. If that does happen, I’ll write another book and tell you all about it.

But only if you promise to behave. Only if you’re good.

The End

Deirdre Madden’s novels include
The Birds of the Innocent Wood, Nothing is Black, One by One in the Darkness
, and
Authenticity
. She has twice been shortlisted for the Orange Prize, most recently for
Molly Fox’s Birthday
. She has also published three novels for children.

She teaches at Trinity College, Dublin, and is a member of the Irish Arts Academy Aosdána. 

FOR CHILDREN

Snakes’ Elbows

Thanks for Telling Me, Emily

FOR ADULTS

Hidden Symptoms

Remembering Light and Stone

Nothing is Black

Authenticity

One by One in the Darkness

The Birds of the Innocent Wood

Molly Fox’s Birthday