Ivy and Bean: What's the Big Idea? (6 page)

“Slow down,” whispered Bean. “If we catch up to her, she'll get mad at me.”

“But you're not doing anything wrong,” whispered Ivy.

“I know, but she'll get mad anyhow.” Mrs. Trantz was strange that way. You would think she'd get tired of getting mad at Bean, but she never did.

Slowly, slowly, Mrs. Trantz and Dottsy trudged along Pancake Court. Even though she was slower than a slug, Mrs. Trantz acted like she was in a big hurry. Every time Dottsy stopped to sniff a lump of grass, Mrs. Trantz yanked on her leash and said “Come!” in a high voice. Dottsy looked sadly back at each lump as she was dragged away.

“Go slower,” whispered Bean.

“I can't go any slower,” whispered Ivy. “If I go any slower, I'll be going backwards.”

“Let's crawl on our hands and knees,” whispered Bean. “We'll pretend we're ants.”

They dropped to their hands and knees and crept after Mrs. Trantz, being very slow ants. Little pebbles and sticks dug into Bean's knees, but it was still better than being yelled at by Mrs. Trantz.

“Poor Dottsy,” murmured Ivy. “This is all she sees. Rocks and dirt and Mrs. Trantz's behind.”

“I'd rather look at rocks than Mrs. Trantz's behind,” Bean whispered.

Up ahead, Dottsy turned around and saw them.

“Rrrryp?” she said wonderingly and tried to stop.

But Mrs. Trantz wouldn't let her. She tugged on the leash. “Come!” she snapped.

Dottsy's legs quivered, trying to stay in one place. “Rrryurg,” she choked.

Mrs. Trantz turned around to give a really hard yank and saw Ivy and Bean crawling up the sidewalk. “Is that you, Bernice?” she squawked, squinting at Bean.

Bean tried to crawl into some bushes.

“I know it's you! Get up! Stop teasing my dog or I'll call your mother! Get up!”

Bean and Ivy stood up. Ivy bravely said, “We weren't teasing your dog, Mrs. Trantz.”

“Who are you, little girl?” yelled Mrs. Trantz. “Leave my poor Dottsy alone!”

“Rrryp?” said Dottsy, sniffing hopefully towards Ivy and Bean.

“Come, Dottsy!” said Mrs. Trantz, giving a giant yank on the leash. Mrs. Trantz was old, but she was strong. Dottsy went flying through the air.

“Poor Dottsy,” said Ivy, watching them totter home.

“Yeah,” said Bean. “She has a terrible life, and there's nothing she can do about it.”

“If I were her, I'd run away,” said Ivy.

“But she can't. Mrs. Trantz is bigger than she is. Mrs. Trantz can stick that leash on her and pull her around.”

“It's not fair,” said Ivy. “People always win.”

“Yeah,” Bean nodded, watching Mrs. Trantz haul Dottsy up her front steps. “But you know what? Maybe we can make it fair.”

“Mom,” said Ivy, “can you tie this knot?”

Ivy's mom was working in her office. Click, click, click, her fingers jumped along her keyboard. “Mmm,” she said.

“Mom?” Ivy said.

“What?”

“Can you tie this knot?”

“Yes,” said Ivy's mom. Quickly, she leaned over and pulled on the string wrapped around Ivy's wrists. She tied the ends in a knot.

“Thanks,” said Ivy. She and Bean turned to leave. “Bye.”

“Mmm,” said Ivy's mom, her fingers beginning to jump again.

They walked down the hall to the front door. Walking with their hands tied in front of them was weird. It made their stomachs stick out.

“Wait,” called Ivy's mom. She poked her head out of her office. “Can I ask why you've tied your hands together?”

“It's a global warming idea,” said Ivy.

“Oh,” said Ivy's mom. “What do you mean?”

“Well, you know how lots of animals are in trouble from global warming?” said Ivy. Her mom nodded. “They'd have a better chance if humans weren't so powerful.”

“If humans weren't as strong and smart and stuff,” added Bean.

“So we tied up our hands, to make it more fair,” said Ivy.

“We thought about hitting ourselves on the head, so that we'd be dumber,” said Bean.

“But then we thought that would hurt,” Ivy said. “So we picked hands instead.”

“If we can't move our hands, we'll be weaker,” said Bean. “And then the animals can take over.”

“They could take over the world from the people,” said Ivy.

“It's a very interesting idea,” said Ivy's mom. She smiled. “Where are you going now?”

“We're going to go outside and let the animals see that we're weak,” said Ivy.

“We may be eaten,” said Bean, “but we don't mind.”

“It's for science,” said Ivy.

“That's definitely a good cause,” said Ivy's mom.

She didn't seem very worried, so Ivy said, “If we do get eaten, bring our skeletons to the science fair.”

“Will do,” said Ivy's mom and went back inside her office.

They stood in Ivy's front yard, trying to show the animals that they were weak.

“Come and get us!” called Bean.

But the animals must have been napping, because it was Katy from down the block who answered. She stepped out of a camellia bush and stared at them.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Global warming,” said Bean.

“We're fighting it,” said Ivy. “We're giving the animals a chance to—”

Katy interrupted. “You want to play Bad Orphanage?”

Katy had changed a lot. When she was little, she had only wanted to play House.

“No, thanks,” said Ivy, “We're working on a science project—”

“Just wait right here,” said Katy. She crawled into the camellia bush and backed out with a jump rope. “I'm the mean orphanage matron and you're the orphans,” she said.

“No,” said Ivy again. “We're doing a science project!”

Bean didn't say anything. She loved Bad Orphanage. She loved being the cruel matron who fed crusts to the orphans.

But Katy had her own plan. Katy was stringing her jump rope through their tied
hands. “You're my orphan prisoners!” she said and cackled a cruel orphanage matron cackle. “Cry and scream,” she ordered them in her normal voice.

“Now wait just a cotton-picking minute here,” began Bean. If she didn't get to be a cruel matron, she didn't want to play.