It Never Rhines but It Pours (20 page)

I glanced over at the shotgun. Harry was curled up in a little ball of fear. Sarah was staring, white faced, at the door. I heard footsteps on the front porch. That was it. Dang it! I was not going to sit here and wait for something to come in and kill us all. I grabbed up the shotgun, checked the safety, and took an even-legged stance pointing at the door.

The footsteps paused. I heard a grunt as someone fumbled with the doorknob. My heart was beating so loudly at this point that it was amazing that I heard even that much. I focused on holding the gun steady. As soon as whatever it was poked its head through that door, I was blowing it to kingdom come. Or making it really angry. Either one.

The knob turned, the door creaked slowly open and Harry and Sarah both let out little yelps of fear. I so wanted this to be over. I couldn’t handle this kind of stress.

The door stopped halfway. I could barely make out the outline of an arm and a bulky shape. It didn’t look human. The door was pulled back a little and the creature cleared its throat.

Chapter Twenty:

Floyd Finds Us

I steadied my aim, ready to fire as soon as I was reasonably sure of hitting my target. I hoped the creature came through the door soon because much more of this and I was going to pass out from hyperventilating.

“Piper?” the creature asked in a familiar voice.

“Who’s there?” I croaked.

“It’s me, Piper,” the voice sounded like Cecily. “If you are planning to shoot me as I walk through the door, I seriously hope that you rethink that.”

“How do I know it’s you?” I asked suspiciously. What if it was some kind of creature mimicking her voice?

I heard a sigh. That sounded authentic. “Do you really think that something is mimicking my voice?”

“No,” I said angrily. “Of course not. That would be stupid. Walk through the door slowly.”

I held the shotgun ready as the door was pushed open. Cecily slowly stuck her head in and gave me a devilish wink. She was carrying a man draped over her shoulders like a sack of potatoes. That was what had made her outline look so bulky and odd.

“Do I have to know the secret password?” she asked with a grin.

I stuck out my tongue. “We were scared. There was fighting, a cry, and then you didn’t answer.”

“You really think that something could take me out?” she jeered.

Sarah smoothed down her top and tried to look nonchalant. “It’s possible. We didn’t know.”

Harry was still a little white around the eyes. I set the gun down and gave him a half hug, half little shake. “It’s okay, honey. There’s nothing to be scared of.”

Cecily dropped the unconscious man on the couch. We all four stood and stared at him. He was short, slight, balding, and wore a t-shirt that said, “I Dig Cryptozoology,” with two crossed shovels and some weird looking animals.

“Okay,” I said slowly. “What is he doing here?”

“I found him listening under the window,” Cecily said, brushing her hands off on her skirt. “I gave him a little tap on the head to insure good behavior.”

“Uh-huh,” I nodded. I looked at Sarah, “Water?”

“Should work,” she agreed and trotted off to the kitchen to find a somewhat clean glass to fill with water from the sink. She brought it back and handed it to me.

I looked at Cecily who nodded. “All right then,” I said and dumped the entire cup on his head.

The man spluttered and coughed and tried to jump off the couch, but was stopped with a look from Cecily. He sank back, trying to awkwardly pull his legs in close to his body for protection.

“What were you doing outside the window?” I asked sternly.

“It’s a free country!” he yelled in protest.

“This is private property,” Sarah pointed out.

“No it’s not!” the man was triumphant. “This is a squatter’s trailer! The county owns this land! I have just as much right to be here as anyone!”

Cecily crossed her arms over her chest and loomed. The man let out a little squeal and tried to burrow deeper into the couch. “What were you doing out there?” she asked.

“The public has a right to know!” he yelled. Yelling seemed to be a thing with him. Every sentence was spoken like he was at a rally trying to whip people into a frenzy.

“Shall I get rid of him?” Cecily asked, fingering that stupid sword again.

“No!” Sarah and I yelled together. Harry was still huddling in the corner, unsure of what was going on.

“That man is always sneaking around!” he said, pointing with a shaky finger.

We all turned back to the man. I gave him my best displeased mother look. “What is your name?” I asked.

He looked around as if for help, caught Cecily’s eye again, and subsided. “Floyd,” he muttered. “Floyd Jenkins.”

“Floyd?” I asked in surprise. Although, now that I knew his name it seemed pretty obvious. “As in ‘reward for reporting suspicious sightings?’ Floyd?”

“You saw my ad?” he looked up hopefully.

I sat down and tried to look less menacing. Cecily chose to continue looming and glaring. “What are you doing out here, Floyd?” I asked again.

“I was listening,” he said sullenly.

“Really?” I said dryly.

“We could still get rid of him,” Cecily suggested.

“It’s my discovery!” Floyd whined. “I’ve tracked the beast for years! It’s not fair!”

I blinked. Beast? This silly man had been tracking a werewolf for years? How dumb could you get?

“We’re not trying to steal your discovery,” Sarah said, confused.

“Then why are you out here?” he demanded petulantly.

“Umm,” I looked at my companions.

“They’re here to help me,” Harry said.

I looked over at him. He was so young and small and helpless. Way too young to be dealing with all this. “Harry,” I said gently, “We really need to talk to your mother. Do you know when she’ll be home?”

“Yes!” Floyd leaned forward, eyes glittering with avarice. “Where is your mother, boy?”

“His name is not ‘boy,’” I snapped. “Show some common decency or shall I have my friend here teach it to you?”

Cecily smiled her dead-eyed shark grin. It even gave me the willies.

Harry was shaking his head. “You can’t talk to Mom,” he said, glancing back at the closed bedroom door.

“Why not, Harry?” I asked. “It’s really important that we talk to her.”

Floyd remained quiet but was eagerly following the conversation. I wished that we had had more time to talk to Harry before this unfortunate interruption. I felt like we had walked onto a stage, half way through a play and were still trying to catch up on the characters and their motivations, not to mention the plot.

“You can’t see Mom!” Harry yelled, starting to cry.

“Harry,” I held up my hands in appeal. “We really are here to help you, but to do that we really need to talk to your Mom.”

“No!” he screamed.

“Where’s your mother, boy?” Floyd cried, jumping off the couch towards Harry.

Cecily grabbed him in mid stride and swung him firmly around to crash back on the couch. She was in pure vampire mode, eyes totally black, canines elongated, and snarling in fury. Sarah and I stumbled back in shock. I knew what Cecily was, but it was still scary to see your best friend morph into a monster before your eyes.

Floyd was staring up at Cecily’s face. Not in fear or horror, as I would have assumed, but with a strange look on his face. It was so out of place for the situation that it took me a while to figure it out. It was joy.

“You’re a …” he couldn’t get the word out. “You’re a … you’re a …”

“Silence, slurpee,” she snarled. “Try to touch that child again and I will tear out your intestines to strangle you with.”

Gulp. That would have shut me up. But Floyd? Not Floyd. He was in rapture. “You’re a vampire!” he breathed in awe.

Sarah looked at me and we both shrugged. Friend Floyd was obviously missing a few important cogs in his brain.

Cecily was not responding well to the lack of fear in Floyd’s voice. I could tell that she was moments away from carrying out her intestine threat. Besides being really gory and gross, it would probably be horrible to clean up after, and it would smell bad. Not that this room could smell much worse. The skunk smell was getting stronger. There must be a whole family of them out there in the woods releasing their scent.

“Floyd, sit down and be quiet,” I commanded and of course he had to obey.

“This guy is crazy!” Sarah complained.

“Tell me about it,” I agreed. “We’ll have to fix him later. Harry,” I turned back to the child. “I know you are scared, but I promise you, we are not here to take your mother, or hurt her, or hurt you, or hurt anybody. We are really just here to help. But in order to do that we
must
talk to your mother.”

“No,” he shook his head, tears still welling up in his eyes. “You’ll take her away.”

“I promise you,” I said, “We will not take your mother away.”

“He wants to take her away,” Harry was pointing at Floyd, who was sitting obediently on the couch.

“We won’t let him take her,” I said. “I promise.”

“He’s always trying to take pictures of her, to put her in the newspaper!” Harry cried. “He called hunters out here! One of them almost killed her!” He was quickly growing hysterical.

“Harry,” I said urgently, “I will not let him hurt your mother. We can fix it so that he never bothers ya’ll again!”

“How?” Harry screamed. The emotion in the room was escalating. Part of my brain noticed that the smell was growing even more pungent. The rest of my brain was turning in circles trying to figure out how to assure this child that we were the good guys. I didn’t want to have to use the Voice on him. But if things kept going this way, I would have no choice.

That’s the problem with power, with the ability to coerce people against their will. You know it’s wrong to use it, but sooner or later ‘you have no choice.’ Stalin probably felt the exact same way. He didn’t want to murder millions of people, he was just pushed into a situation where he ‘had no choice.’ Man, I hated myself sometimes.

“You can’t see her, you can’t see her!” Harry screamed. He was way past reasoning with. It was time to use the Voice. Like it or not, we had to see his mother and get this whole mess cleared up.

I opened my mouth to speak when Cecily held up a hand. “Did you hear that?” she asked quietly.

I stopped and listened. Not again. Who else was outside listening in? The floor shook beneath my feet. The skunk smell grew overpowering. There was a roar from the back of the trailer. It was like nothing I had ever heard before. Not lion, not bear, not even TV dinosaur. It was deeper and angrier and scarier than any sound I had ever heard on National Geographic. Of course, knowing that it was coming from the other side of a half inch composite door probably added to the fear.

If I had to make a guess, Mama was home and she was not happy.

Chapter Twenty-one:

A Second Dead End

The bedroom door was slammed open. The knob hadn’t been turned. The door had merely been hit so hard that it splintered and burst out of the frame. We were all standing in frozen positions of shock. All accept Floyd. He was still under the Voice and sitting obediently on the couch.

All eyes were glued to the doorway. At first, I couldn’t make out the creature that was standing there. It definitely was
not
a werewolf. At least, not the kind of werewolf that I had met. This so surprised me that it took several seconds to comprehend. I had been so sure that Harry’s mother was a werewolf. It had all made sense. Except, it was totally wrong.

The creature let out another roar and rose to full height. The trailer ceiling was a standard eight feet tall and her head was brushing it. She filled the hallway from side to side and it almost looked as if the floor was bending under her weight. Her eyes flashed red in the reflected light and if I could have screamed and run, I would have. The trailer was much too small and too crowded to run in, so I settled for just screaming.

Harry’s mother was a Bigfoot. A huge, scruffy ape creature that smelled like a skunk who had taken a bath in a sewer. This was so not what I had been expecting. I felt a little lightheaded and decided to stop screaming and take a breath of air. I regretted that as soon as I gasped and gagged on the smell.

The Bigfoot roared again and a small figure jumped up in front of her, waving its arms.

“It’s okay, Mom!” Harry yelled. “It’s okay! Calm down!”

She roared again and smashed a fist through the wall. I could see our car through the hole. Gulp.

“Now look what you’ve done!” Harry yelled, looking at me.

“Me?” I croaked, “What
I’ve
done?”

“Yes!” he was furious. “You made her mad.”

I held up my hands to show that I was tiny and harmless and inched over to stand by Cecily. Sarah quickly wiggled behind us. Floyd was still on the couch, wide-eyed. Maybe I should release him from his forced sit. On the other hand, we didn’t need any more people running around the tiny living room and screaming. Then there wouldn’t be room for me to do it.