It Never Rhines but It Pours (12 page)

“Piper!” Nana was shocked. “That food was on the
floor
!”

Tattletale. Now Mom would get on my case. “The six second rule,” I explained, hoping she would let it drop before Mom noticed. She was currently engaged in a conversation with Pravus, which I was dying to listen in on, but couldn’t with Nana scolding me.

“The what?” she asked.

“The six second rule,” I spoke quickly, trying to hear what was being said at the other end of the table. “You know, if you pick food off the floor before six seconds it doesn’t have germs.”

Nana frowned. “That does not seem to be scientifically accurate.”

“I know,” I smiled. “But it excuses picking food off the floor. At home I have even shorter because our dog, Harvey, snatches …” I trailed off. Come to think of it, Mom’s dog should have been there, ready to grab falling food out the air.

“Hey, Mom,” I interrupted. “Where’s Bingley?” Bing was also a cairn terrier, like my Harvey, but wheaten instead of black. He looked like a walking carpet and loved food more than anything else in the world. I was very surprised to not see him sitting under the table.

Mom made a sheepish face, “I put him outside,” she said.

“Why?”

“He was growling at Richard!” she sounded shocked and embarrassed. Usually Bingley loved everyone. He was absolutely useless as a guard dog, but very affectionate.

I glared at Richard, “Really,” I said. “I’m surprised.”

“I know!” Mom exclaimed, “I’ve never seen him act that way before. I don’t know what has come over him.” She turned back to Pravus. “I do apologize again. I would have felt horrible if he had bit you!”

I made a face at Pravus while my mom wasn’t watching. “Yes,” I pretended to agree with her. “That would have been terrible.”

“Thank you for your concern, dear cousin,” Pravus said dryly. “But fortunately I escaped unscathed.”

“How fortunate,” I replied with equal dryness.

Nana chose that moment to butt in. “Dogs are dirty creatures,” she said loudly, “and should not be allowed in people’s homes.”

Megan looked up in surprise. “I like dogs, Nana!”

Cassidy, not to be left out, chimed in, “Me too! Me too!” She sprayed particles of her sandwich all over the table.

“Cassy!” I said sharply. “Don’t talk with food in your mouth!”

Nana wiped her arm off with exaggerated disgust. “Really, Piper. You should control your children better.”

I saw Mom bristle at the implied insult and tried to quickly change the subject. “So, Nana. Did you have a good trip here?”

She smiled at Richard, “Yes, Richard darling was so very helpful. I don’t know what I would have done without him.”

“I didn’t know that you were bringing anyone with you,” Sarah remarked.

Mom perked up a bit. I could tell that she was dying to ask the same question but didn’t have the nerve.

“Yes, do tell,” I added. “When did your plans change?”

Pravus leaned back in his chair and smirked at me. Was I close enough? Yes! I could just reach! I gave him a hefty kick under the table with the edge of my shoe. He jumped a little but maintained a pleasant smile on his face.

“Of course, we are thrilled to have you visit,” Mom assured him. Feeling perhaps that all the questions might make him feel unwanted. Ha. I’d show him unwanted.

I had an evil thought. Why didn’t I command him to leave again? Sure, he said he’d worked up some sort of magical protection, but what if Sarah and I worked together? How long could he hold up against the two of us?

I caught Sarah’s eye and tried to give her a look that said, “Use your ability on Pravus to make him leave.” She gave me a look back that plainly said, “What?”

I tried to the look again and added a head nod and a shoulder scrunch. She opened her eyes wide and held her hands out, the universal sign for, “I have no idea what you are trying to say.”

I rolled my eyes and tried again, with bigger motions. Why hadn’t we learned sign language as children? Or telepathy! Telepathy would be nice. Mom looked over at just the wrong moment.

“Are you okay, Piper?” she asked.

I smoothed out my facial contortions and said, “Of course, Mom. Why do you ask?”

“Because you were making faces,” she said.

“Not polite,” Megan said sagely. “Not supposed to make faces at the table. Not when Mommy is watching.”

I glared at her. So young and already only obeying when I was watching. We’d have to talk about that later. Right now I had a witch to run out of town.

“Mom,” I said loudly, causing all conversation at the table to cease and every head to turn. “I’m so sorry to tell you that Cousin Richard said that he wouldn’t be staying.” Pravus opened his mouth to protest.

I commanded with all the power I could summon, “You have to leave.”

He smirked at me. “No, I don’t.”

“Yes, you have to leave,” I commanded again. “Sarah?” I gave her another looking asking for help. She finally got it and went still. I assumed that she was doing her thing.

“I told you,” he smiled. “I’m going to stay for awhile.”

“No, you have to leave, now,” I commanded.

“Piper!” Mom protested. “If he wants to stay, of course he is welcome!”

I didn’t have the energy to waste on commanding her. “You have to leave,” I commanded.

“No,” he said, still smiling, but beads of sweat were starting to collect on his forehead.

“Piper!” Mom said loudly. “You’re being rude!”

“You have to leave,” I kept trying. I’d never felt someone resist me like that before. It felt like I was pushing with all my might against a brick wall. I noticed Pravus was leaning towards me slightly and that his hands were clenched in his lap. Ha! It was working. Sarah had her eyes closed and her lips were starting to move.

“I’m not leaving, Piper,” Pravus said quietly.

“Yes, you are,” I commanded. I was getting tired. This was worse that running a marathon! Not that I’d ever run in a marathon, but I could imagine, that’s why I’ve never done it.

“No, I’m not,” His face was starting to turn red.

“You have to leave, now.”

Mom stood up from the table. “Piper Cavanaugh, you stop that this instant! Richard is welcome here for as long as he wishes to stay!”

I couldn’t turn my head to look at her. I had to keep my focus on Pravus. “You have to leave,” I repeated like a recording. Good grief! How strong was the man? Why didn’t he break?

“No,” he gasped. “I’m staying. I don’t want to die and I don’t trust you to do your job.”

Mom’s jaw dropped, “Die? What are you talking about? Are you in trouble?”

I was ready to fall on the table in exhaustion. “You have to leave now,” I whispered still using the Voice.

“No,” he answered.

I gathered all my strength for one for try. If this didn’t work, we’d have to regroup and try something else. “You have to leave now!” I bellowed, not sure if volume would add more power to my ability but willing at this point to try anything.

“No!” he screamed and a ball of lighting sizzled in the air in front of him and exploded on the table, which caught fire.

We all sat for moment in stunned silence as the flames leaped up towards the ceiling. The smoke alarms went off and the girls started screaming. I leaped into action first, grabbed up my daughters and hustled them out of the room.

“Stay here,” I commanded, placing them on the couch in the living room and rushing back to the dining room.

Mom had grabbed the dishcloth off the stove and soaked it in the sink. She was beating at the flames while Nana looked like she was having a heart attack. Her lips were turning blue and she was clutching her chest in pain. Sarah was pouring all the glasses onto the fire and within seconds it had sputtered out, leaving a blacked, charred mess behind.

“Nana!” I cried and rushed to her side.

“My pills!” she croaked pointing with gnarled fingers at her purse. I found the bottle and quickly administered a tablet under her tongue. She started to look better and I turned to survey the room.

Mom was standing staring at the table in shock. Crap, crap, crap. This was not supposed to happen. As if she heard my guilty thoughts she turned on me ferociously. “Piper Alexandra Cavanaugh!” she yelled.

I cringed. I hadn’t been three-named in a long time. I thought those days were past. “Wow,” I tried. “What was that?” It sounded guilty to my ears.

Mom placed her hands on her hips and gave me the “mom” look. I was in trouble. “What is going on?” she demanded.

I went for wide eyed innocence. “I don’t know!” I lied. “How did the table catch on fire? That was so weird!”

It wasn’t working. Mom had known me too long to not know when I was lying. “You had better tell me what is going on, right now, young lady, or you are in
big
trouble.”

Seriously, what kind of trouble could I be in? More than I already was? It’s not like she could ground me or send me to my room! I was a married mother of two, for Pete’s sake! Why did I feel so scared? “Umm,” I stalled.

“Right now,” she insisted.

Just then I saw Pravus grin. That did it! If I was going down, I was taking him with me. “He started it!” I yelled pointing at the witch.

“What?” Mom’s voice was hitting upper octaves. Soon only dogs and small children would be able to hear her. I knew because my voice does the same thing when I’m furious.

“He did! He started the fire! I didn’t do anything!” I was babbling, anything to turn the evil eye away from myself. I hoped my command was holding on Megan and Cassidy and that they didn’t come in to see their mother cowering like a baby.

“We do not accuse our guests of setting fires,” Mom said with dignity. Like a fire in the dining room was a normal occurrence. “And we do not yell at our guests to leave. What were you thinking?”

Pravus stepped up and laid his hand on her arm. I gritted my teeth. I did not want that slimy witch touching my mother. “It’s perfectly alright, Marion. No great harm has been done. Your daughter is just a little exuberant.”

“Exuberant!” I shrieked, losing it. “You lying, little witch! Get your hands off my mother now before I make sure you don’t have hands at all!”

“Piper!” Mom couldn’t believe what was going on. She’d never seen me so rude before. Of course, she’d also never entertained a Satan-worshiping jerk in her home before, either.

I’d had enough. This was getting too messy to clean up in any normal fashion. “Sarah?” I asked.

Sarah was standing behind Nana’s chair, eyes as big as dinner plates. “Yes?” she squeaked. It must be odd for her to not be the one getting in trouble.

“I need your help,” I said.

“What does Sarah have to do with any of this?” Mom wanted to know. “Honestly, Piper, it’s like you’re a crazy person! What is going on?”

I sighed. I’d never used my Voice on her before. I just didn’t have any better options. “Mom,” I commanded sadly. “Sit down and be quiet.”

She sat and closed her mouth. “You too, Nana,” I added.

Nana was still sitting but she kept quiet. “Sarah, do your thing,” I said.

Sarah closed her eyes again and I almost felt the air hum, but perhaps it was my imagination. “Mom and Nana,” I commanded, “close your eyes and sit still.” They obeyed, what choice did they have?

I turned on Pravus. “Look what you’ve done!” I yelled. “This is all your stupid fault. You shouldn’t be here! They are not part of this, and should be left alone!”

“What
I
did?” he shot back. “You’re the one throwing power around! Is it any wonder that it backfired?”

“Backfired!” I was still yelling. “That was a little more that a
backfire!
That was more like a
bonfire
! My kids were at that table!”

“Then you shouldn’t have been fighting in front of them if you didn’t want them to be part of this,” he crossed his arms across his chest and looked belligerent.

“This is my house!”

“No, it’s not,” he was calming down. “It’s your mother’s house, and she invited me to stay.”

I growled in frustration. What a mess. Speaking of mess … I looked at the table. The tablecloth had been badly burnt, as well as the food, but the table itself didn’t look too bad. “Help me clean this up,” I said.

Sarah started to clear the dishes, but Pravus sat back down. “Well?” I asked caustically.

“You heard your mother,” he said. “I’m a guest.”

I gripped a butter knife in my hand. Oh, how I’d love to stab him with it. I restrained myself and helped Sarah finish cleaning up the mess. In minutes we had set the room to rights, put on a new table cloth, and cleared the plates. I placed the plate of cookies in the middle of the table and put fresh plates in front of everyone. Sarah took the scorched dishcloth and used it to fan the air in front of the fire alarm. It reluctantly shut off and she stuffed the towel down in to the bottom of the trashcan.

“We just started desert,” I suggested to Sarah, and she nodded. I went to get Megan and Cassidy, who were still sitting obediently on the couch. “Come on, girls,” I said. “It’s time for desert.”