Iron & Bone (Lock & Key #3) (17 page)

My breathing suspended for a split second at the sound of that name. My muscles locked, my head stiffly drawing back.

I motioned at Dawes and Tricky, and they picked up Catch and dragged him from the cellar, through the kitchen, out the lounge, down the hall, and out the door. They dragged him across the dirt and gravel, past the gate that lay open just for him. The boys dumped him on the road, and Led crouched over him.

I tossed my cigarette by his sorry ass. “You have a good night.”

I charged back into the clubhouse and poured myself a whiskey. I stretched my arms against the bar and struggled for air.

“Bro, you okay?” Dawes asked.

“Go away.”

“You sure?”

My body shook. “Go!”

A running soundtrack of screaming voices and spurting blood and cracking bones filled my ears.

Promises broken.

Oaths sworn.

Curses invoked.

Dreams destroyed.

Alejandro’s fucking voice jumped in my head.
“One day, I’m going to come for you, and I’m going to take it all away.”

Then, I’d had no dreams left, my dreams had petered out, drained away.

Once I became a Jack, my only focus had become survival and a good time doing it.

But now I had a dream.

Now
, I had Jill.

My hands dug in my hair as a wave of nausea surged up my throat and yanked on my insides. All the reasons not to be together with Jill, not to make a life with
anyone
, reared their ugly heads and laughed at me.

I had put hundreds of miles of road between me and the Calderones. I had changed my name, kept away, laid low.

It didn’t matter, though, did it? Hearing Catch say his name just now proved that.

But tonight—
tonight
—I had finally given into the temptation, to the promise of
her
. I’d tasted that rightness singing in my blood, filling my arms. I had found the one thing I had always wanted but had refused myself for fear it would be threatened, taken away.

How can I go back to being that man again? How can I go back to being without? To being without her?

I couldn’t. No fucking way.

I would protect her with every ounce of whatever strength and cunning was left in me.

I would hold on to what I had claimed.

To Jill.

To my own life.

Hold on for as long as I could, for as long as it would last.

“
YOU ARE THE BEST FOOT AND LEG MASSAGER EVER
.”

“I learned from the best,” said Grace.

“Lock?”

She grinned. “Mmhmm. He spoils me rotten.”

“You’re spoiling me rotten now.”

Grace and Lenore had taken me to Boner’s room and given me a ginger ale to drink. I’d insisted on taking a shower, and then Grace had handed me a T-shirt of Boner’s to wear. Lenore had left soon after.

Tears clouded my eyes. “I’m sorry about all this.”

Grace glanced up at me. “What do you have to be sorry about?” She rubbed her thumbs into the sides of my calf muscles.

“Catch and our never-ending drama. I should’ve told him sooner. I kept putting it off. I knew he’d freak out. I—”

“Jill, he chose to lose it. He chose to drag you here and stake some sort of Neanderthal claim where there is no claim for him to make. Even if the baby you’re carrying were yours and not mine, he’d have had no right to behave the way he did. Yeah, they’re his crazy emotions, and Catch has always been a fireball since he was a kid, but he’s not a kid anymore. He put your life in danger, even his own with the way he came out here and the shit he said.”

Her hands traveled down to my feet again, her thumbs focusing on my arches.

“They’re teaching him a lesson now, aren’t they?” I asked.

“I think you know the answer to that.” She released my feet and rubbed her hands together, the light, clean fragrance of her moisturizer lingering between us. “Are you feeling guilty about that?”

I dropped my head back against the headboard and stared at the ceiling. “No, I can’t say that I am.”

“Good.”

I took her hand in mine. “Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome. Do you want some more ginger ale? Lenore brought this bottle of water, too.”

“I’m all set.”

“You okay with staying here tonight?”

“Better, now that we spoke with Rae, and I know that she and Becca are okay.”

“Thank God for Martha the neighbor, huh? She kept things calm and got them both in bed for the evening.”

“She’s such a good person.”

Meager was a good town with good people. But I had brought the bad. The bad to Rae, the bad to my daughter, and now, the bad to Grace.

My chest caved in, my lungs squeezed.

“Jill? Honey, look at me.” Grace’s voice got woozy. “Breathe with me. Come on. Listen to my voice. Let’s count, okay?”

My throat tightened, my skin prickling. “You do that, too?” I gasped for a breath.

“For years now. Count with me. Here we go. Breathe in slowly. That’s it.”

“One, two, three, four.”

“Hold. One, two, three—”

I held my breath and heard my voice join Grace’s. “Four.”

“Release.”

“One, two, three, four.”

All my focus went into my breathing, my counting. I stared at Grace’s hand firmly on mine. Her beautiful diamond eternity bands were all lined up on her ring finger.

Yes, the diamonds.

I held them in my line of sight and gave them my spinning emotions. My fear, my panic, twisted out of me and headed for the diamonds.

Mole tied me up to the bed, the headboard rattled and banged against the wall.

The rope burned into my wrists.

His gleeful sweaty face above me.

His sour breath steaming over me.

“Breathe,” came Grace’s steady voice, breaking through the images.

Give it all to the diamonds.

“One, two, three, four,” I intoned.

“I’m gonna fuck you like a train, bitch, and you’re gonna love it! Choo-choo!”

That “beloved” flashback played out against the back of my eyes like a movie.

“You gimme the pizzas for free, and I’ll let you play with her. Just don’t fuck her pussy. That’s all for me.”

My chest squeezed.

It’s just a flashback, images, a memory. It can’t hurt me. I am more than a memory. I am more than a memory.

“Hold.”

“I’ve never fucked a pair of titties before. Can I do that?”

“As long as I get to watch while I eat those pizzas you got.”

My neck went limp.

I’m here on Boner’s bed, in Boner’s room, at the One-Eyed Jacks in Meager, South Dakota. Becca is safe with her grandma. I am not alone. I’m with Grace.

With Grace.

With Grace.

Spin away. Spin away.

“Release—”

“One, two, three, four.”

My shoulders slumped, an opened water bottle was before me, and I took it and drank slowly as Grace’s fingers wiped the hair back from my face.

“Lie down. I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere until Boner gets back, okay?”

“Okay,” I whispered hoarsely, lying back down on the bed.

“And don’t worry. I changed the sheets when you were taking a shower.”

“You did?”

“I didn’t look too closely, but I wanted you to be comfortable. I have this thing about clean sheets. It comes with age. You’ll see.”

We laughed together, and that lightness felt good.

Grace shut off the light in the room, and I curled myself around a pillow and let out a breath.

There was still more to give to the diamonds.

A light tickle skipped up and down my neck, and I arched away from it. “Hmm.”

An arm wrapped around my middle, settling on my belly. “Jill.”

His voice.

I opened my eyes.

“You okay?” Boner asked.

I turned in his arms and nestled in his hold. “Are you okay?” I murmured against his throat, savoring the mild creamy soap scent of his damp skin.

“He ain’t coming near you again. He gets to come see Becca and his mom and Tania, and that’s it. You don’t ever have to be in the same room with him.” His hand stroked up and down my back. The hand that probably, moments ago, had been punching Catch, smacking him, throttling his neck, making him bleed.

For me.

I curled up in Boner’s arms, my one hand sliding in his wet long hair, so cool and lush against my fingertips. “Thank you.”

“You’re not scared, are you? Being here with me?” His voice was low, tentative.

“No. No, not at all.”

“Grace and Lock are spending the night here, too.”

“Good.”

A heavy sigh escaped his lips. He was worried. My hand smoothed up and down his tense back.

“He scared you, threw you on a bike, half-dressed. All this in front of his ma and Becca?”

“Yes.”

“Such a motherfucker.”

I planted a long kiss on his tense shoulder. “It’s over.”

“He fucking hurt you. You got nothing to say?”

“I thought I’d never see Becca again. I thought I’d lose this baby.”

He gently kissed the side of my face over my bruise. “Fucker,” he whispered.

“Or you. I thought I’d never see you again.” I melted against him, my lips brushing his chest.

He sucked in a tiny breath. “You okay with this? Us together?”

“Are you?”

“You said you didn’t want to be an old lady again. I get that.”

“And you said you didn’t want an old lady.”

“We can do this until the baby is born. Then, you’re free of me, of all this.”

Free of him?

A heaviness seeped through my middle. He had claimed me to protect the baby. Of course he had.

I didn’t want to be an old lady though. I didn’t want that role. I wanted…
damn it,
I didn’t know what I wanted. I only knew that, right now, it felt good, so good, to be in his arms, in his bed.

I got what I had told him I wanted, didn’t I?

“Right, exactly. For the baby,” I said. “I can pretend to be your old lady until then.”

Boner coming to my rescue had been grand and valiant, impulsive and smart. But still, I didn’t think Catch would let this go so easily. He liked to prove all his points, and he always had to have the last word. The Jacks might have gotten their licks in tonight and made the boundaries clear, but Catch wasn’t done. I was sure of it.

I tangled my legs in Boner’s. The T-shirt I wore suddenly felt thick and rough between us. I yanked it off me.

“Jillee.”

I threw the shirt on the floor. “I need to feel you.” I lay down on top of him. “Hold me,” I whispered.

Boner took in a slight breath. His hand slid over my ass, and a shiver zipped up my spine as he stroked my rear, his other hand diving into my hair. His cool skin against my heat left me breathless. I was hyperaware of every part of me touching every part of him—our feet, our legs, his huge erection hard under his boxer briefs, his heaving chest under mine.

I needed this blunt honesty to ground me right now.

His minty breath was hot against my skin, and I swept his sensational long, thick hair back from his face.

His brows tensed together in a dark knot for a moment and then released, as if he didn’t understand the mystery before him but realized that it didn’t matter. It was simply better to admire it.