Into the Tomorrows (Bleeding Hearts Book 1) (2 page)

T
he party was rocking
when we arrived four hours later, just outside of Denver. In true Colin fashion, there was an assimilation of loners, druggies, athletes, thespians, and various other labels. Colin and Ellie seemed to share a mind when it came to seeing past the costumes we wore.

Ellie took off toward the living room when she saw someone she knew and I craned my neck, searching over dozens of people for his beautiful head. I heard laughter and looked around, through the curls of cigarette smoke, into the dining room.

I found Colin in the back of the house, surrounded by a sort of Noah’s ark of the world’s cliques. His arm was around the shoulder of a girl I recognized from Facebook photos—the soccer player—but he was talking to a boy whose eyes were rimmed with black liner who wore chains and a trench coat.

He raised one arm and tossed the tiny white ball across the wooden door that was laid flat, a makeshift beer pong table.

The ball bounced once before landing in a red cup. Cheers erupted from the opposing team, and one of his opponents saluted him with the cup before downing its contents and grimacing.

“Trista!” Colin said, his voice booming over everyone else.

I smiled, feeling that tickle in my stomach I always felt when I saw him. He stepped away from the soccer girl, toward me, and I watched in slow-motion as he moved among dancing bodies, in between conversations, until he was in front of me. “You made it,” he said, his lips split in a grin.

I was suddenly overcome with relief in seeing him. Five months was like an eternity when you were separated from the person you loved with your whole heart.

His arms came around me and he yanked me roughly against his body. “I missed you,” he breathed into my neck. The scent of his cologne surrounded me and I settled against him.

“I missed you too.”

His lips were on mine a second later, soft, teasing. I pushed against them, wanting the roughness he’d promised when he tugged me to him.

He pulled back, ran his hands over the hair on either side of my head. “You look different,” he said. It wasn’t true. He tugged on one frizzy lock of hair.

“You look the same,” I replied. Because he did. He always looked … I wasn’t sure how to describe it. Clean. Put together.

“I’m glad you’re here.” He wrapped an arm around me and led me to the back patio, separating us from the noise of the house with a thick glass door.

He let go of me to light the candle on the worn railing. “Stand over here; fewer bugs.”

I stepped close to the candle and he gently bumped into me. “Nice party.” I raised an eyebrow and bumped hips with him.

“Surprised?”

I looked over my shoulder at the people on the other side of the door. The bass from the stereo thumped gently against the glass. “Not really. All the people … it’s you. You don’t belong to any one clique.”

“I don’t believe in limiting myself,” he said, turning to face me as he leaned on the railing. “You know that.” He gave me that warm smile, putting his hand at the back of my head and pulling me to him. “God, I missed you,” he said again.

I melted under his hand. It’d been a long few months without him and I was looking forward to spending the night with him. Even just one night. “It feels like it’s been forever since I saw you.”

He kissed me three times, humming against my mouth. “Fucking distance,” he said. “The fraternity shit has kept me from you.” He kissed me twice more. “And you need a better car.”

“I know,” I said in between kisses. It was so easy to be with him, to hold him, to love him. “I can’t wait until Ellie and I transfer here in a year.”

He sighed and pulled me close. “Me too.” His arm rubbed up and down my back and I closed my eyes, just enjoying being in his arms. “You should come now.”

“You know I can’t afford it.” I turned my head, kissed his shoulder. “I wish I could.”

“I can wait another year for this to be perfect.” He pulled away, pressed a long kiss to my mouth. “Can you?”

I nodded and then the door behind us opened.

“Yo, Colin. Got any more beer?” Someone leaned out the door, his eyes hopeful.

“Yeah, I’ll grab some.” Colin turned to me and wrapped his arm around my shoulders again, pulling me close. He pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “Go on inside and play some beer pong, I’ll catch up with you.”

* * *

B
y the time
I found Ellie on a couch passing around a joint, we’d been at the party for nearly a half hour. Ellie saw me and scooted a few people aside to make room for me beside her.

I sat between Ellie and a guy with a beard long enough to braid. When he handed me the joint, I shook my head no and passed it to Ellie. There were five people passing the joint around the circle of the couch and loveseat directly across the coffee table, and I suddenly felt all their eyes on me.

I had nothing against smoking a little pot now and then, but I wasn’t in the business of getting the munchies and adding to my ever-growing waist, especially since I’d developed a lovely little roll around my midsection.

Ellie leaned into me and yelled in my ear, “Having fun?”

I flinched and turned up my nose at her breath. “Can I have some of your beer?” I asked, pointing at her cup.

She handed it over as the joint came around to her again, and I wiped the ashes away from the inside of the cup before downing it. The warm beer hit my throat and my stomach turned, but I swallowed it and set the cup down on the table. Ellie handed me the joint and I passed it along to the bearded man without a single puff.

“That’s the good shit, right there.”

I looked to the man across the table from me. With his Basset Hound eyes and greasy bun on top of his head, he looked confused and sad. He nodded at the joint I’d passed along.

“Oh,” I said, shaking my head. “I’m asthmatic.” It was a lie, but it was easier than gesturing to my stomach and saying that I didn’t want to gain weight. I didn’t want to invite anyone to notice my flaws, as I felt they were so very apparent. This was especially true when I sat next to Ellie.

“Ah,” he nodded, took the joint as it was passed to him. “Pills?”

I knew Ellie had dabbled with pills, but I was too afraid to try them. I shook my head again. “I’m just here to party.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it.” His accent was thick, southern, but he delivered his words soothingly. “It’s good.”

I wasn’t sure what that meant, but I left the couch to get away from their eyes and the stench. Making my way to the kitchen proved a feat in and of itself, as the room was packed with so many bodies that I couldn’t see a clear path to the sink. Colin was back in the dining room, playing another round of beer pong with the soccer girl lurking.

Feeling a hand touch my back, I turned around to see Ellie. “Whatcha doing?” she asked, eyes heavy-lidded and an easy smile on her lips.

“I need some water,” I said. Inadvertently, I looked to where I could see Colin through the doorway, and Ellie followed my gaze.

“Go join him,” she said. “You came all this way for him.”

“He’s so busy all the time,” I said, not begrudging his popularity, but making an observation. “I can’t be like that—be like you guys.”

Linking her arm with mine, she whispered in my ear, “Here’s a secret, we like you the way you are. Besides, you know Colin and I have social ADD.”

“Social ADD?”

She looked toward the dining room again before turning back to me. “We love being around people—we’re not solitary in the least.” She cocked her head to the side and gave me a sympathetic smile. “But Colin loves
you
. I can tell. He’s good for you.”

I glanced at him again, saw how intently he was speaking with another girl, his eyes focused. Less than ten seconds later, he’d turned his attention to someone else. He wasn’t unkind about it; but he definitely seemed to dole out attention in equal measure.

“I know he does,” I smiled at Ellie. “I just forget, when we’re apart as much as we are.” Seeing a chance to squirm my way to the sink, I grabbed Ellie’s arm and tugged her with me. We grabbed red plastic cups and filled them, both of us hydrating in anticipation for the alcohol we’d likely consume.

After Ellie’s third cupful, I asked, “Thirsty much?”

She paused at the sink and turned her head to me. “Yeah. The smoke made my throat hurt.” She downed three more cups of water.

“What should we do?” I asked, not wanting to play beer pong and deal with the looks from the girls that hung around Colin.

Ellie smiled a dreamy, eyes-half-closed kind of smile. “Let’s dance.”

I looked around us—no one was dancing. “El, I love you. But no freaking way.”

Ellie looked around. “Come on. What’s that saying? Dance like no one’s watching!”

“Whoever said that was probably talking about people with some kind of coordination. I don’t feel like looking like I’m having a seizure while you dance as if you were born for it.”

She laughed and drank another cup of water.

An arm came around my shoulders from behind and his voice was at my neck. “What’s so funny?”

I turned into Colin, pointed at Ellie. “She thinks we should dance.”

He stared at me, unblinking. “Why is that so funny?”

“My point exactly,” Ellie said, wrapping an arm around Colin’s shoulders. “She’s too uptight. We gotta loosen” —she wiggled her body like a worm— “her up a little.” She raised an eyebrow. “Let’s dance, Tristaaaa.” When she dragged the last letter of my name out, all guttural and gross-sounding, I couldn’t help but laugh.

“No one is dancing,” I said, laughing still. I motioned with my hands at all the people leaning against walls and tables and counters. “I don’t want to put on a show.”

“A show? Trista, my dear, I hate to burst your bubble but your dancing isn’t much to brag about.” Colin squeezed my shoulder despite his light teasing. “But you’re right. I don’t want anyone ogling my girlfriend, even if she does look like she’s having an epileptic seizure while she’s dancing.”

I playfully punched him in the shoulder. “Which is precisely why I can’t subject myself to what will be a complete shit show.”

“Don’t be a wet blanket, Tristaaaa,” Ellie whined, dragging the ‘a’ out again. “Come on.” She reached forward and grabbed my hand. “Colin, get people to dance.”

Asking anyone else would not have guaranteed the results that Colin could produce. He turned around and rotated a finger at the guy manning the stereo. The current song was too loud for him to have been heard over the noise, but the guy nodded in return, sliding his finger across his iPod.

As soon as the drums kicked on, I looked at Colin. “Really?” I mouthed.

He held out his hands as if he was innocent as the lyrics blasted and Katy Perry boasted about kissing a girl and liking it.

“No,” I mouthed to Colin.

He yelled, “It was worth a shot!”

Ellie squealed behind me, hands on my shoulders as she steered-slash-pushed me to a spot that wasn’t dominated by fifteen people. She started jumping up and down, which seemed to pull a few people in to dance with her. She screamed along with the song, bobbing her shoulders to the beat, her hair bouncing around her.

Ellie had a natural charisma; she was gravity, pulling the world to her. I was always in awe of her, because she radiated
life
.

She pointed toward me with a finger and then curled it up, calling me to her. And I couldn’t resist, her energy was infectious. I found myself dancing with her, and the people around us were dancing too, so I was able to forget about people watching, and I could enjoy time with my best friend.

One song burned into another and into another. Sweat poured down my face as we laughed at our moves, spinning around and jumping and clapping to the various beats.

“Tristaaaa,” she yelled over the music, “gotta pee!”

Once she left the dance floor, I was suddenly aware of my surroundings and the strangers that occupied them. I pushed my way from the circle to find Colin, who was sitting on the stairs with a joint in his hands.

“Trista.” He looked at the joint and looked at me, as if he expected me to object. But I was in too good of a mood from the dancing to worry about it and shrugged. “Wanna sit?”

I glanced between him and the guy who was beside him. His head was down, so all I could see was the paint-splattered Rockies emblem on his cap as his long fingers traced the edge of the cup in his hand.

“No, I’m okay.” I fanned my face with my hand. The sweat dripping from my hairline was cooling and I could finally breathe. “I just needed a break.”

Colin sucked on the joint and coughed his exhale. “Where’s Ellie?”

“Bathroom,” I said, pointing my thumb back to the chaos I’d escaped from. “Do you really know all these people?” I glanced around us, taking in the different people milling about.

“As well as I know anyone,” he said. His whole face took on a contented look and he leaned against the stair at his back. “Having fun?”

I smiled, because I was. “I am. I’m sorry I haven’t come down more.”

He shrugged, offering me the joint. When I shook my head, he sucked on it and looked at me from under heavy-lidded eyes. The side of his mouth kicked up in a sexy smile and I suddenly couldn’t wait until it was just us.