Into the Storm (60 page)

“
And thinking about tomorrow?”

I nodded.

Her arms tightened. “They’ll be fine. Cecilia and Trevor will take good care of them. We’re only a couple hours away. John can have us home fast if we have to get here.”

“
I’m more worried I won’t be able to handle this, Rabbit,” I confessed sadly, thinking of the goals Trina wanted me to achieve, or at least attempt to achieve. “I feel totally overwhelmed right now at the thought of all we are going to do in the next couple days.”

She tilted her head up toward me, frowning. “Then stop thinking about the whole picture, Joshua. We’ll take it one goal, one new experience at a time. Together. Just one thing at a time, okay?”

Leaning down, I captured her lips with mine. “You are so smart,” I whispered, as I dragged my lips up to her ear and nibbled on her soft lobe.

She chuckled quietly. “First step is coming back to bed.”

“
Not much point to that, really. I’m not sure I can sleep.”

Her hands wound into my hair, pulling me back to her lips. “Pretty sure I can figure out a way of tiring you out, sweetheart. But you have to come back to bed first.”

I smiled at her playful tone and leaning down, lifted her up into my arms. “Lead the way, Mrs. Bennett.”

The sound of the helicopter approaching the next morning kicked my nerves from frayed into overdrive. Goal number one: leave the property. Although I could do it most of the time without a reaction, today was different. Travelling by helicopter meant I was farther away than I had been in a long time. Bear, who hated the sound, slunk down the hallway to the bedroom, where I knew he would hide until after we had left and the sound of the chopper had faded away. Part of me wanted to join him in his escape. My eyes flew to Rabbit, who was holding Elly as she chatted quietly with Trevor and Cecilia. My own arms tightened slightly on Jack, who slept peacefully in my arms, replete after his morning meal.

How would he and Elly react when they woke up and we weren’t here? What if Cecilia couldn’t get them to settle? My mind raced as I tried to remember if I had listed all the ways of distracting them when they fussed. I stood up, intent on making sure the pacifiers were on the counter, when Rabbit’s voice broke through my thoughts. “Joshua.”

I looked over at her. “They’ll be fine. Let’s go put them in their cribs and then we have to go.” She regarded me quietly for a moment and came over to where I was standing. Her hand came up and caressed my cheek. “One step at a time, Joshua. Now, breathe for me. Deep, calming breaths. You can do this.”

Nodding, I focused on her breathing and matched it. After a minute, I opened my eyes and smiled at her. Silently, I followed her down the hall, and together we kissed our children, tucked them safely into their beds and returned to the kitchen. I could feel her slight tremor as we walked away, and I drew her into my side tightly in silent support.

Cecilia smiled at us. “Trevor took your bags out.” She handed me a folder. “This has everything in it, Joshua: your itinerary, meeting schedules and some notes I made for you. Adam is meeting you at the airport.”

I looked at her surprised. “Why?”

She smiled. “We thought a friendly face would make you both feel better. You’re having dinner with him, Heather, Tracy and Frank tonight, once you finish your meetings with the publisher. Your interviews are tomorrow. We are going to be fine. Daniel and Ellen are coming out later today so, between all of us, your babies are in capable hands.”

Lizzy smiled. “We know that. Thanks, Cecilia.”

I looked down at my wife. “Ready to do this?”

She took in a deep breath. “Right beside you, Joshua.”

Leaning down, I kissed her forehead gently. “Good to know, Rabbit.”

Both Rabbit and I were solemn as the chopper took off and we watched our home fading from view. Our hands were clasped tightly together and I kept my gaze on her, trying to match my breathing with hers. John wasted no time lifting off once we were onboard, and I was sure he was under strict instructions not to listen to any sudden excuses as to not leaving. I squeezed her hand gently and raised it to my mouth, kissing it lovingly; grateful she was there with me. I knew she was anxious about returning to Toronto and even more anxious about being away from the children for a long period of time. We needed each other to be strong.

Arriving at the airport, it was a relief to see Adam’s large frame waiting for us, his wife, Heather, by his side. Hugs and pleasantries were exchanged and John shook my hand, promising to be ready to take off the next day by 6 p.m. “You have your phone?” I asked quietly. Smiling in understanding, he nodded. “We can take off anytime, if needed, Joshua. Just call and I’ll make all the necessary arrangements.”

“
Thanks, John.”

He grinned and waved at us before leaving to file his paperwork and I turned to Adam. “What’s the plan?”

He chuckled and withdrew a sheet of paper from his pocket. “Well, according to Cecilia’s itinerary, once we check you into the hotel, we have time for lunch before you need to be at the office. Cecilia, in her great wisdom, has you staying in a hotel that is walking distance from your publishers, as well as one of our favorite restaurants. So, let’s start there, shall we?”

I nodded and we walked to the car, Lizzy’s hand tightly clasping mine. My phone chirped with an incoming message and I grinned when I saw the pictures that came on the screen. Smiling, I handed the phone to Lizzy and watched her delight as she looked at pictures of the twins waking up from their nap and having a bottle. Cecilia was obviously taking the pictures while Daniel and Ellen fed the babies, Bear watching over them. Squeezing her hand, I leaned over and whispered to her. “They’re both fine, Mommy.” Her eyes were misty as she nodded at me, handing the phone back, but not speaking. Leaning over, I kissed her forehead. “I’m sure Cecilia will send pictures all day. And, you can call as often as you want, okay?”

“
That’s a good thing.” She nodded.

Wrapping my arm around her, I drew her tightly against me in the back of the car. “It is, Rabbit.”

Adam and Heather were full of gossip and funny stories during lunch, helping both Lizzy and I relax. Cecilia had indeed picked a great hotel and the building my meetings were in was literally a ten minute walk away. It would cross another item off my list: taking a walk on the streets in Toronto, something I had not done since the attack.

“
How long do you expect your meetings to be?” Adam asked as we were eating lunch.

I shrugged. “No more than a few hours. It is mostly to meet everyone, go over the illustrations and the book layouts, and make a final decision on how to package them.”

Adam nodded. “And you, Lizzy?” His tone, as always, was gentle when he spoke to her. “What are your plans?”

“
I was going to accompany Joshua, and just wait in the reception area until he was done. I have a book with me.”

Adam and Heather exchanged a glance.

“
I wanted to introduce her to some people there, but we hadn’t decided on exactly what was happening after that,” I hedged. The truth was, I wanted Rabbit to go back to the hotel and relax and she was insisting on staying in the building to wait for me. I didn’t want her sitting alone in a waiting room for the afternoon, but she seemed to feel she needed to be there, and she felt she would be uncomfortable sitting in during my meetings, even though I assured her she was welcome.

Heather spoke up. “I thought maybe you would like to go shopping, Lizzy. I know you don’t get into the big city very often and thought you would like to go to a few different stores? There is an amazing children’s store here. So many wonderful things for your little ones!”

I watched a flurry of emotions go through Lizzy’s expressive eyes. She looked at me, completely conflicted. I knew she would love to go and buy the children some things, yet she had already decided she needed to be where I was. I also saw her anxious reaction to the thought of being out in public, in Toronto, without me beside her. Adam leaned forward. “Tracy was hoping to spend a little time with you also, and she thought she would accompany you shopping. Frank is, ah, busy this afternoon, but she is free for the afternoon. I’ve always been interested in the book creation process so I had hoped Joshua might allow me to sit with him in his meetings, just as an interested observer. Then we could meet after back at the hotel.”

I looked at him, instantly seeing through his causal offer. Lizzy could go shopping, enjoy herself with friends and Frank was going to be following them. She would be perfectly safe. Adam would be with me, so I wouldn’t be alone. He would be introduced as my lawyer and no one at the office would think twice about him being there. Walking with him, I would undoubtedly be safe. Closing my eyes, I took in a deep breath, part of me grateful for friends who cared so much that they went to these lengths to help us, and part of me annoyed I needed them. But when I opened my eyes and met Adam’s steady gaze, the only thing I could feel was gratitude. I nodded silently at him before I turned to Lizzy, smiling. “What do you think, Rabbit? Shopping with Tracy and Heather sounds like a great deal more fun than sitting in the hotel or the reception area.”

She seemed to hesitate, so I slid my chair closer and reached for her hands in comfort. “What is it?”

“
I promised you I would stay with you. Are you sure you’re okay with this?” she asked, her voice anxious.

“
Yes, Rabbit.” I nodded. “It’s a great solution. I don’t want you sitting in the waiting room or by yourself in the hotel, feeling anxious. You can meet everyone tomorrow before my interviews. This afternoon, go and do something fun with Heather; I’m more than good with that idea. I can concentrate on what I came here to do. You can go hog wild and buy Jack and Elly some presents. They’d love that,” I encouraged her. “Maybe buy yourself some things as well?”