Into the Storm (50 page)

Adam looked at her. “Does Brian wear the overcoat he had on yesterday a lot?”

Rabbit looked confused but nodded. “Usually, most days. Why?”

Adam smiled. “I think it’s safe to say Mr. James is safely back in Toronto and will remain there. His overcoat will come in very handy to make sure. I spoke with Frank. He is willing to stay here if you want or come back with me to help out with some, ah, checking I want done.”

“
Take him back with you, I’ll have the security cameras on and the gate closed. If anything comes up, I’ll call the police.”

Adam nodded. “I actually spoke with the local precinct already. They know there is a situation, so if you call them, they’ll respond.”

We stopped by the truck. Adam regarded us briefly. “Lizzy, there is a restraining order on Brian being processed now. He can’t come near you. Nor can anyone associated with him.” Beside me, she nodded. “Joshua, I’m sure he won’t do anything. He is not going to risk bad press right now. Just be diligent, okay? And, stay in touch.” He clapped me on the shoulder. “I’m on it, Joshua. I promise both of you that Brian James is history.”

I lifted my eyebrow at him questioningly.

He smiled calmly at me. “Let’s go. I have an important meeting with a colleague this afternoon. It’s going to be
very
revealing.”

I relaxed. He was meeting with the asshole’s lawyer today. He was indeed on it and I smiled in understanding.

He grinned back. “You look after your family and let me handle this.”

I nodded. Nothing was more important than Rabbit’s safety or the wellbeing of her and my child. The gun and the phone were staying close and the gates shut.

I looked up from the laptop, smiling. Rabbit was sound asleep again, but her toes were starting to move, indicating she would wake up soon. She looked so peaceful when she slept now, and the only sounds escaping from her mouth were tiny little snuffles that made me grin. Beside her, Bear snored away loudly on the floor. Since Adam and Frank had left three days ago, our routine had pretty much been the same. Wherever one of us was so was the other. Rabbit was calmest when I was close and my touch soothed her. Simply having her close brought me a contentment I had never experienced before, so the intimacy was welcome. Rabbit slept a lot, with Bear a constant companion by her side. He seemed to sense something was different and had taken on an even more protective stance when it came to her, rarely leaving her side even when she slept.

Yesterday, when I had suddenly felt the need to paint, Rabbit joined me up in the studio once I had the loft warmed up with the heaters and had brought over some extra blankets. As usual, within ten minutes of her sitting down, she drifted into sleep, Bear at her feet, and I found myself sketching and shading, completely absorbed in my work. It wasn’t until she stirred a few hours later that I even moved from the easel. Crouched in front of her, I was pleased to see her looking more rested. She had gotten up and gasped in pleasure over the watercolor I had been working on. “It’s so full of light, Joshua,” she whispered. “Can we put it in our baby’s room?” My already full heart swelled and, wordlessly, I had taken her in my arms, only able to nod.

Our baby.

Our baby’s room.

There just wasn’t anything I could say to express the joy those small words brought me.

Her soft sigh drew me back to the present. She was waking up slowly. Her eyes opened and met mine and I smiled at her. “Hey,” I said smiling, rubbing her feet that were resting in my lap.

She blinked sleepily at me. “I did it again.”

I laughed. “You’re following doctor’s orders. Wanna smoothie?”

It was her turn to laugh. “I’m going to turn into one, Joshua, if you keep making them for me to drink.”

My face turned serious and I placed my hand on her stomach gently. “They’re good for you and besides, I think she likes them. You sleep very well after you have one.”

“
She?” Her voice was soft as she looked down and placed her hand on top of mine.

I nodded. “A little girl rabbit. My bunny girl. BG.”

Her eyes filled with tears.

“
What if it’s a boy?”

I grinned. “My Jack Rabbit then. Either way, Rabbit, I will love our child fiercely. Just like I do their mother.” I watched a tear slip down her cheek. “Don’t cry, Rabbit, please.”

“
Happy tears, Joshua. I’m just so full of happy tears.”

I smiled and wrapped my hand around hers. “That’s all I want you to have, Rabbit. Happy tears. Now BG needs a smoothie.” I grinned as I stood up. “When I get back I want to show you all the cool things I found online. Did you know how much stuff a baby needs? It’s incredible.”

Rabbit laughed. “We have lots of time, Joshua. Um,
BG
won’t be here for a while yet.”

I grinned. “I know. Still, we have lots to do before she arrives.”

Rabbit laughed. “Okay, Joshua. Go make me another smoothie and then show me what you’ve found. Then I’m going to go and putter.”

“
Putter? You need to rest.”

She groaned. “Exactly. Daniel said rest, not sit on my ass all day and sleep.”

I knelt down beside her. “You’re sleeping so much because you need it, Rabbit. Don’t push yourself. There is nothing you have to do. Let me look after you, please.”

She smiled and cupped my face. “I love how you want to take care of me, Joshua. But I feel like doing something. I was thinking of maybe making a pie for after dinner, and maybe that I’d cook tonight. Pasta?”

I wasn’t going to argue with that. I stood up, holding out my hands and grinning. ”Well, that activity I can fully support. I’ll help after I make your snack. Come to the kitchen with me, okay?”

Rabbit laughed, placing her hands in mine. “Okay.”

Adam called the next day. He thought we should know that Brian James’s father had passed away of a sudden heart attack. He also let me know that the follow-up meeting he had with Brian and his lawyer would be postponed until the following week. We spoke briefly, and after I hung up, I hesitated before letting Rabbit know what Adam had said. I wasn’t sure how she would take the news or if she would even care. She was quiet for a moment and then shrugged her shoulders. “I suppose I should feel bad for him; or Brian even. But nothing he did ever pleased his father. And, Douglas James never seemed to like me.” She suddenly laughed bitterly. “I was never good enough for either of them. That was the one thing they seemed to have in common.” She looked up at me and I was surprised to see a look of anger in her eyes. “I still don’t understand why, Joshua. Why did Brian insist on staying married to me? Why did he do all those awful things to me? Why didn’t he just let me go? I wasn’t what he wanted—he made that very obvious!” Tears began to pour down her cheeks and I pulled her into my arms, trying to soothe her. I had no answers for her.

“
I’m not sorry he is gone. He was an awful man. He knew what Brian did to me; I know he did … but he did nothing to stop it!” Her voice was becoming hysterical and I regretted telling her. Daniel said to keep stress to a minimum. I held her tighter and felt her body shaking hard with sobs as I rocked her. “Hush, Rabbit. Please calm down. Please, sweetheart.”

I pulled back and held her wet face in my hands, forcing her to look at me. “Listen to me
. He
is a fucking stupid, self-centered, narcissistic ass. I can’t tell you why he did what he did and I can’t understand how he could have done such terrible things. Especially to you, Rabbit.” I stared at her, not allowing her to break my gaze, my thumbs drawing circles on her damp skin. “
He
is the one that is not enough. He doesn’t even deserve to share this planet with you. He is a cruel, thoughtless, heartless bastard. He deserves to be alone the rest of his life. I hope his entire life is filled with regret. I hope he’s alone the rest of his miserable, lonely, pathetic, unimportant existence.” I drew in a breath. “I hope his company fails, his hair falls out and his dick shrivels up and drops off,” I added for good measure.

Rabbit’s eyes widened at the last statement. But apparently my childish outburst had stopped her building hysteria. When I stopped to take a breath, she lifted a finger to my mouth. “Are you done?”

I shrugged and kissed her finger. “He doesn’t deserve to be a part of any of your thoughts,” I mumbled against her skin.

She regarded me sadly. “I try not to think about him, Joshua. Sometimes it just … overwhelms me.”

I observed her for a moment.

“
I don’t want you overwhelmed, Rabbit. Maybe … you need someone to talk to? Someone who won’t go crazy at the mention of the bastard’s name?”

“
You mean therapy?”

I nodded and reached over to hold her hand. “To help you deal with this. Move forward.”

She was quiet for a moment and then nodded. “I think I need to, Joshua. I need to put this in the past.” Her hand lifted to her stomach. “I have so much to move forward for.”

I leaned forward and kissed her softly. My brave girl. She was so much stronger than she gave herself credit for. I looked down at her tiny hand holding mine over our child. My gaze drifted to the window. There was a whole world out there that our child would need to be a part of; school, friends, birthday parties, appointments. I thought of memories of my own childhood: parent/teacher nights, school concerts, trips to the zoo, family vacations … I had to be able to be there for our child as well. I wouldn’t be able to do so if I couldn’t walk past the fucking gate. We both had to move forward.

“
Then I think we both should go for some counseling, Rabbit. You need someone you can talk to about your past and I need to push forward. Our baby is going to grow up and need a world outside these gates and I want to be at their side when they walk through them.”

She smiled widely. “
Oh
, Joshua. Yes. You can do this. I know you can.” She wrapped her arms around my neck and held me tight. “I’m so proud of you.”

“
Both of us, Rabbit. We both need this. We’ll talk to Trina and you can decide if you want to become her patient as well or if there is someone else you would prefer. Whatever you’re comfortable with.”

She nodded in agreement. “Okay, Joshua. We’ll both go.”

I nodded. “Okay. I’ll make the call.”

I pulled her back to me and held her, breathing in her soft scent deeply.