Inspire (20 page)

“Yes, I am DEFINITELY done. What he did hits too close to home for me, so I can never look at him the same,” she said. I didn’t know what she was hinting at, whether something had happened to her, or a family member or a friend of hers, but clearly she felt strongly on the matter, which I was relieved by.

“I’m sorry that things turned out the way they did for you Britney. I hope you know that you can turn to me or any of your friends here if you need to.”

“Thanks. I know that most of my friends here probably don’t want to listen to me cry over Corey though. They wanted me to end things last summer after the way he treated me, but I held on thinking that things would return to the way they once were. I know I shouldn’t really mourn the loss of this relationship, but at the beginning it was wonderful.”

Britney turned towards me as she continued, bringing both of her knees up to her chest in the chair and resting her chin on them. “When we first started dating it was incredible. Corey was so sweet and loving. He and I would go on these long hikes and just talk for hours about everything. His mom had just left them to be with someone else, so things weren’t that great on the home front. Corey didn’t really have any empathy from his dad or brother who seemed to have cared less, so Corey walked around hiding his true emotions. But with me, he wasn’t afraid to share what he was going through. He would cry in my arms, and show me his vulnerable side, which is one of the reasons I fell in love with him. Our love grew pretty quickly because of that, and Corey was the one who said it first.”

It was obvious from the way Britney was talking about Corey that she truly had loved him. “We spent that summer doing all kinds of amazing things, hiking and exploring the area, and making out all over the place, of course,” Britney said, giggling nervously at her comment. “Even when I returned home to start school in the fall things were great between us. He came to visit me for the vacations and came to all of my dances. It was magical. Things stayed that way all the way up until the spring. That’s when I…” Britney paused and turned her head to stare at the empty fire pit. She looked lost in a trance for a moment, but I just waited in silence for her to find the courage to continue. “It was in the spring when things changed, right after I told him that I had been raped.”

My heart sank at her revelation, and I was completely at a loss for words. “Britney… I’m so sorry,” I stuttered.

“So am I. I made the wrong decision on our spring school trip and went off by myself to find a bathroom, alone. I ended up in a really bad situation,” she said, squeezing her eyes tightly shut as if she was trying to block out the memory. “I don’t like talking about the details of it all, but if I can offer you any advice Paige, especially since you’ll be going to college in the fall, is to never go anywhere by yourself. Always make sure you have a friend with you. I stupidly wandered off, and a boy from one of the other schools cornered me.” I now completely understood her hitting close to home comment and why she would so easily break ties with Corey.

“Anyway, everything got dealt with. The boy went to jail because he was eighteen, so he was tried as an adult and I was put in counseling. It was traumatizing, but I was lucky to have a lot of support from friends and family. The only one who wasn’t very supportive though was Corey. I don’t even know what happened or why he reacted the way he did, but once I told him, he became closed off. He stopped calling as much. He cancelled his plans to come in for my junior prom, and things were just different,” she said, shaking her head in confusion. “It was only a couple of months before we were coming back here for the summer, so I waited it out to see what would happen. I was in the middle of the trial anyway, so the time rushed by. I thought that when Corey saw me again, he would realize that I was still me and nothing had changed, at least not on the outside. I spared him the emotional trauma that I was dealing with on the inside so that he would forget it even happened.”

I felt sorry for Britney as I listened. Here she had helped Corey through a traumatic time in his life when his mother had left them without warning, but when Britney was going through something tragic she couldn’t turn to him for the same support. Her words made me want to reach out and hug her, but I sat quietly giving her the attention she deserved.

“Some guys don’t know how to react in certain situations, even my counselor said that boys can have a harder time when someone they care about gets hurt. So I gave him the benefit of the doubt and waited for the summer to arrive. But, when I got back here things were the same. Actually, Corey seemed to grow even more distant and started to drink…a lot,” she emphasized the words. “I wanted to believe that most of his problems were caused by the alcohol. He wouldn’t listen to me though when I tried to talk to him about it, so I asked the girls for help. Coraline then went to talk to him privately one day, but that didn’t seem to help. In fact, it just made things worse. After their little talk, Corey seemed to have developed a little crush on her. He kept making comments about how pretty she was, and how I should take some fashion advice from her. I was pretty certain that if she were single, he would have dumped me and made his move.” I assumed as she spoke that Coraline was the same person as Cora who was mentioned earlier. “Of course after witnessing it all, Travis and Ashley encouraged me to end things, especially Travis. But for some reason, I couldn’t walk away.”

I found it endearing that Travis was looking out for Britney and didn’t want to see his friend treated in such a way. It warmed my heart to know that he wasn’t an asshole like Corey, and he knew right from wrong. I brushed that aside to focus on Britney as she continued. “I had been through so much already and really believed Corey would wake up and snap out of it, so I regretfully didn’t take their advice. When I learned that Cora wasn’t coming back this year, I was relieved and hoped that she would be out of Corey’s system. But, when I saw the way he was looking at you that day on the river, I knew that things were going to be the same. It’s why I joined forces with Ashley to keep you away. I hoped that I could keep you far away from Corey, so that I could try to recover what we once had. In all of my efforts though, all I managed to do was treat an innocent girl rudely because Corey still managed to have you on the brain. I realize what it boils down to is that he doesn’t love me. Not any more at least, and the reality is… I deserve better.”

Britney’s comments made me aware that she would heal in time. She was already facing the hard facts, and choosing not to blame herself, which is a huge step in the healing process. “I was stewing all day on everything that he said and was realizing that in our relationship Corey has spent more time being a jerk to me than being a loving boyfriend. The anger has been building in me for a while I guess and his actions last night just helped wake me up. I’m sorry that you were caught in the middle of it Paige, and I am truly sorry for the way I treated you. You definitely did not deserve the cold treatment you received. So, I hope you will forgive me.”

“You are forgiven, consider us friends, Britney,” I said, wanting to give her a life-line. She felt that the others wouldn’t have any patience for her but I knew that sooner or later she was going to go through a rough patch and need a shoulder to cry on, and I would be more than willing to be there for her.

“Thanks Paige!” she said and then returned her stare to the fire pit, focusing once again on the unlit logs.

“Hey, are you two alright?” Travis asked, startling us from behind. I had been so deep in concentration listening to Britney, that I hadn’t heard his arrival.

“Do you want me to get the fire started?” he asked.

“We are fine Trav. Just talking. I owed Paige an apology so I stopped by. She is a very forgiving person,” Britney said, giving me a smile.

“I’m gathering that,” Travis agreed, touching my shoulder as he walked around my chair.

“Are you doing okay Brit? How are you holding up?” he asked, taking the seat next to her.

“I’m okay. Things could be better, but I’m dealing with it,” she said simply.

“I know you loved him Brit. I’m sorry that things worked out the way they did, but I have no doubts that some super stud from NYU is going to come in and sweep you off your feet. You deserve the fairy tale Brit, so it will happen.”

Travis’s remark was so kind, and he came across as being truly sincere and not just trying to pacify the situation. It was another sign showing me what a good guy he was, and it made me wish I could bounce over and hop onto his lap.

“Thanks Trav. I think I’m going to focus on my studies first, but when the time is right I know my prince will be waiting.” She giggled at her comment and a little bit of relief lit her face. I could tell that her heart was already on its way to recovery and it was reassuring to know. Britney had been through a lot over the last year, and she deserved a brighter future. She truly seemed like a great girl with a very sweet heart. Her self-esteem had probably taken a little bit of a beating from all that she had endured, but I could tell it wouldn’t be long before her confidence returned.

Travis, Britney, and I stayed down at my place talking for a while. He wanted to make sure that Corey was out of the picture for good as well, and pressed her for the scoop. She reassured him that was the case, sparing him all of the details that she had given me. He already seemed to know her history though, and understood completely why she could never forgive Corey for the way he behaved. We continued talking for a while about the four of us: Ashley, Travis, Brit, and I being in New York City together next year and how we need to make sure we keep in touch. I could tell that the brother bear side of Travis was coming out and he wanted to be able to keep an eye on Britney in the fall. We laughed for a bit, and then Britney decided to face the inevitable.

“Well, guys, I think I need to go make amends with Ashley. I owe her a huge apology for our fight this morning, so I am going to go find her,” Britney said as she rose from her chair.

“They are up in the game room. Let’s walk up together,” Travis offered, being the gentleman that he was and wanting to make sure of her safety.

“Thanks. Hey Paige, if things go well, do you want to have breakfast with just the girls in the morning followed by a day of pampering at the salon?” she asked.

“Sure. And I know that things will go well, so definitely count me in,” I answered.

The three of us made our way up to the game room to find Scott and Ashley playing pool, while the rest of the bunch were playing foosball and ping-pong. Ashley stopped in mid-strike when she saw Britney. She put her cue up against the pool table and walked straight over to her friend to give her a hug. “You okay Brit?” she asked. Britney immediately broke into tears, so I made my exit to let her have her moment with her friends. Travis followed me out taking my hand when we got outside.

“So, I’m starting to believe that you really do sprinkle magic all around you. You really do inspire people,” Travis said in a loving tone. When we were down the hill and out of sight, he stopped in front of me and kissed me hard.

“Wow,” I said, catching my breath upon his release of my mouth. “You definitely inspire me,” he said, smiling against my lips.

“Same here,” I said, kissing him again.

“So, are you too tired or can I take you down to my place?” he asked.

“I think I was just given a second wind, so let’s go,” I answered.

“Good,” he said and then led the way through the woods down to his tent.

Chapter 18

Travis started a fire for us, and I waited patiently on the blanket for him to sit with me. “So babe, did you have a good day?” he asked, popping a squat behind me and pulling me back against his chest.

“Yes, it was a very good day!” I said, twisting so that I could see his face.

“I got nervous when I saw you and Britney sitting there together, did that go okay?” he asked leaning down to nuzzle my nose with his.

“Yes, she apologized for everything and filled me in on her past with Corey. The guy is a real jerk,” I stated.

“Yeah, I don’t know what happened but after her ‘incident’ he just lost interest and cast her aside. It was hard to watch. I tried to talk to him about it last summer, but he wouldn’t get over his shit.”

“What did he have to get over?” I shrieked. “She’s the one that went through the painful experience.

“I know. I don’t know what his issue was, but I think for some reason he had a problem that Britney had been with someone else. He tried to play it off saying that he wanted to give her space to heal and didn’t want her to feel pressured having a guy around, but I didn’t buy it,” Travis said, shaking his head staring at the fire.

“It’s not like she wanted to be with someone else. The girl was raped. How could he just cast her aside like that?” I was getting angrier by the second at the realization that Britney had been thrown away like dirty trash. I was starting to rethink my decision on pressing charges; based on this new revelation the guy deserved to be put away for a bit.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with Corey. Clearly there is a lot going on there,” Travis said.

“Britney said that Coraline tried to talk to him, but that it just made things worse. Then she said that you and Ashley tried to convince her to dump him.” Travis looked upset by my statement and I could tell that it was bringing back unwelcome memories.

“Yeah, I thought that he deserved the boot. It’s one thing to give Britney space to heal, but it’s another to openly become infatuated with another girl and make blatant comparisons.” Travis gritted his teeth angered by the thought.

“What did Cora do? Who is this Cora girl anyway?” I asked.

Travis twisted in his seat and became uneasy by my question. It was an awkward reaction, which made me wonder why. “Cora just played it off, but definitely liked the attention,” he said, shaking his head in disgust.

“So, is she a regular here during the summers?” I asked.

“Yeah, her family has been coming up here for the last five years,” he said.