In Too Deep (6 page)

N
akyia and I were chilling on South Beach when I faintly heard my cell phone vibrating in my bag. I looked at Nakyia to see if she had noticed it, but she hadn't. She was having one of her good days when the pain wasn't too severe. She said she wanted to go to the beach, soak in some fresh air, and let the sounds of the ocean massage her mind. I didn't mind that at all. Beaches were always good for the mind, body, soul.

I loved South Beach in June. Thongs, string bikinis; what more could a man ask for? I discreetly reached into my bag and pressed a button to stop my cell's vibration, and then lay back on the towel with my shades on and did some subtle sightseeing while my wife read the latest novel by one of her favorite authors, Roy Glenn.

“Don't be afraid to leave me here and go in the water,” Nakyia said, looking up from her book. “I know how you love the sea.”

“I'm cool right here with you, ladylove. Besides, I'm not in the mood to swim today anyway. Too tired.”

Which I was, because I'd been with Taki the night before. I'd told Nakyia I had to work late, and then I was going to go out with my boy, Jeff, who wasn't really my boy. He just worked in the finance department downstairs. He was the only one who knew about the relationship Taki and I had. He'd been in his car one night about to leave, when he saw us kissing each other good-bye. Taki's back was to him, so she had no idea he'd been there.

“What's up, Jeff?” As soon as Taki had driven away, I approached his car.

He turned the key in the ignition. “Chillin'.” Silence passed between us for a hot minute, before he said, “Yo, I didn't see a thing.”

“You sure?” I asked skeptically.

“I'm sure. Just like you're sure you didn't see anything when I was saying good-bye to Lisa a couple of months ago.”

I gave him a nod and pound, and that was the end of that. As long as I had his back, he would have mine.

I took a small break from my sightseeing and looked up at the clouds in the clear-blue sky. It really was a beautiful day. I was glad Nakyia suggested we get out. It felt good being there with her. It was nice seeing her in a cheerful and bright mood. She used to be a very affectionate woman, which is one of the things I loved most about her. But after the neuralgia, all that stopped. I looked away from the sky and watched her read her book. She was actually smiling without grimacing, and that gave me a pleasant chill. I missed her carefree smile. It was something I rarely got to see. For a brief moment, I was jealous of Mr. Glenn for accomplishing a feat I couldn't seem to do, no matter how hard I tried sometimes.

“Good book?” I asked.

“Mmm-hmm,” she said with another smile. “Roy Glenn's characters know the time when it comes to dealing with someone that's betrayed their trust. One bullet to the brain. What better message is there?”

She was looking dead at me when she said that, and I don't know why, but I swear it felt like she'd been giving me a message of her own. I shrugged off the feeling, though, rationalizing that my conscience had been fucking with me.

I gave her a smile and then went back to my sightseeing. A few minutes later, as I started to doze off to the sounds of the waves hitting the shore and the seagulls in the air, my cell phone vibrated again. I took a quick look over at Nakyia. She'd fallen asleep with her book lying across her chest. I waited for a moment to see if she'd notice the vibration, and when she didn't stir, I reached into my bag, grabbed my phone, and took a quick look to see who was calling. When I saw who it was, I slid the phone into my pocket, and stood up. As I did, Nakyia opened her eyes. She started to speak, but before she could, another jolt of pain came on. I watched helplessly as her face twisted, and her mouth hung open. I hated seeing that. I hated that I couldn't take the pain away. When the pain finally subsided, she composed herself and said, “Couldn't stay away from the water, huh?”

I knelt down and kissed her on her forehead. “Yeah, but I'm not gonna swim, though. I just want to feel the water on my feet. Then I may take a walk over to one of the shops for a bite to eat. You want to come?” I asked, already knowing what her answer was going to be.

Nakyia shook her head. “No. My nerve is starting to act up. It's about time for me to take my medicine. You go ahead.”

I kissed her forehead again and stood up. “Okay, sexy. I won't be too long.”

I strolled down to the water just like I said I would, and then headed off the sand to Ocean Drive. I nearly tripped a couple of times, as I passed by honeys of all shapes, colors, and sizes. When it came to fine ass, South Beach had more than enough. Being married could be a cruel punishment sometimes.

When I got away from the beach and the distractions, at least the ones in the thongs on the sand, I grabbed my phone and returned Taki's call. “You called?”

Her voice was honey when she spoke. “Yes I did, handsome. Did you listen to the voice mail I left you?”

“No.”

“I want to see you. Whilice took the kids to a movie, and then they're going to visit his parents. I told him I had some work to do, so I'm free all day.”

I smiled as a Latina with a body full of seduction walked past me and gave me the up-and-down. I had to turn around when she passed me and admire her sashay. “Abe?” I heard Taki say.

Another cutie with skin the color of dark chocolate walked past me, and after we traded admiring glances, I put my focus back on the call.

“I can't today, Taki. I'm spending the day with Nakyia. We're at the beach right now.”

She sighed into the phone, and sucked her teeth. “I want to see you bad, baby. I'm wet just thinking about what I want to do to you here on my water bed.”

I looked at the waves in the ocean and imagined swelling up and down on that bed with Taki above me naked and sweating. I felt myself harden, which wasn't cool because I didn't have my shirt on to hide behind. I turned away from the ocean view, and focused on a pile of garbage; I needed something ugly to change the thoughts in my mind. But Taki wasn't trying to let me off the hook.

“I bought a new massaging oil that I want to put to use. It gets hot with friction.”

“Taki, you need to chill. I can't today. Teasing me won't do you or myself any good.”

“Mmmm, baby. If you could see me now. . . .”

Damn.

I slid my hand into my pocket and, very discreetly, adjusted myself, trying my best to keep anyone from noticing the hard-on I was getting.

Damn, she knew how to work me. I looked at the rise and fall of the ocean again. I wanted to be there with Nakyia, but the thought of being inside of Taki was almost too much. I still tried to resist, though. “Taki, I really wish I could, but I promised Nakyia we would spend today together. Besides, we need to chill and keep it discreet. Being in your crib is not being discreet.”

“But it would be fun,” Taki purred.

“Yeah, maybe. But unless you could guarantee that Whilice wouldn't show up, there's no chance of that happening.”

“Abe,” she whispered. I could tell that she was getting off on the phone.

A brother could only adjust himself but so much. I had to end the call, but the sound of her voice and the image I had in my mind made it damn near impossible. More honeys walked by; I wondered if any of them noticed the bulge.

“Abe,” she whispered again. “Meet me in the office if you don't want to be here. I'll bring the oil. I want to show you how warm it gets.”

Shit.

I was sweating.

And it wasn't from the heat.

“All right. Give me a few. I'll call you when I'm ready.”

“Hurry baby. The cat is purring and wants some milk.”

I hung up before she could say another word. I crossed the street and stood outside the gates of where Versace was killed. I had a couple of Versace suits at home. Damn shame he was gone. I moved from there and walked past patrons sitting outside of a bar enjoying beer and food, under the shade of umbrellas. I needed a cold one myself.

I crossed back to the beach and stepped onto the hot sand. I was burning inside. Taki had me on fire. I figured there was no better excuse than work.

“Baby,” I said, tapping Nakyia gently. She'd fallen asleep again. I sighed. She looked so peaceful with the book lying beside her. This was the only time she truly got relief from the neuralgia. How could I disturb that? I shook my head, disgusted by what I was going to do, and decided to call Taki and tell her that I wasn't going to be able to meet her.

As I stood up to walk away, Nakyia opened her eyes. “Hey handsome. What do . . .” she paused as another wave of pain came over her. “What . . . do you need?” she finished, when it subsided.

I looked at her and cursed myself. This was supposed to be our day. I'd promised it to her. We needed days like this.

“Abe? What's . . . what's wrong?”

I continued to look at her, but didn't speak. At that moment my big head was battling my little head.

My wife or Taki.

My wife, who couldn't let loose, or Taki, who wanted to do just that and more.

“Abe?” Nakyia said, grabbing my attention.

I clenched my jaws and looked out to the waves rising in the ocean. Rising like Taki would on top of me in the office where she was waiting for me. “I'm sorry to do this,” I said, feeling like such a bastard. “But my boss just called. She and the VP are having a big meeting tomorrow, and she needs some information that I have. The only problem is the things I need are at work.”

Nakyia frowned, only adding to the guilt and shame I felt. “Do you have to go? There's no way you can get this done in the morning?”

“Unfortunately, no. I have too much going on in the morning to spend time on this. Believe me, I'm just as upset about this as you are. I even told her that I was at the beach.”

“And?”

“And she wasn't trying to hear it. She wants the info today.”

“What a bitch.”

“You can say that again.”

She did.

I shrugged my shoulders and said, “Unfortunately, I need the job.”

Nakyia sat up, took my hand in hers, and placed it on her left cheek. The right side of her face was always off-limits. “We better get going then.”

I looked at her and frowned.
Why did she have to be so damn understanding?
“I'll make this up to you. I promise.”

She smiled and said, “I'm sure you will.”

We left the beach, and headed back to West Kendall, where we live in the Villas of Barcelona. It's a gated community that gives an impression of an old world village. Our villa is Mediterranean-style with three bedrooms, and warm sun-and earth-colored walls and a Spanish-style tiled roof. It's reminiscent of the beauty of Barcelona. The community itself has a recreation center with a wet bar, gymnasium, whirlpool, and swimming pool. It's almost like living in an old, Spanish city. At least that's what the brochure said. Nakyia chose it. She liked the Spanish flair, and she also liked the fact that it was peaceful and clean. I had no problem with her choice, because after the first visit, I saw that we would have some fine honeys for neighbors.

When we got home, because the medicine she'd taken had kicked in, Nakyia went straight to the bed to lie down. I made her a cup of tea, and turned on some light jazz for her to sleep to. After that I jumped in the shower. When I finished getting ready, I knelt beside the bed and placed a very gentle, yet careful kiss on Nakyia's lips. I loved my wife very much, and for a brief moment, I was tempted to undress, cuddle in the bed beside her, and forget all about Taki and her massage oil. But my penis wasn't having it; just the mere thought of the oil made it jump. It was time to go.

I changed the CD collection in the player, and left while Howard Hewett sang about how much he loved his lady. In the car, I called Taki and told her I was on the way.

“I
can't believe he had the nerve to have that bitch there!”

I continued to squeeze the hell out of my stress ball as I paced a hole in my mother's beige carpeting. I'd just finished recounting the episode with Randy to her, and as direct as only she could be, she expressed how unsurprised she was to hear the news.

“Randy's a man, Monique. That's what they do. When they can't have one woman, they always go running for the closest one they can find. It's in their nature to think with their little head and not the big one.”

“I thought Randy was different,” I said with a sigh.

“Like I said, he's a man. Be glad that you caught him red-handed.”

“Well, I wouldn't exactly call it red-handed.”

“Monique, his pants were unbuckled, his shirt was damn near hanging off his shoulders, and that bitch was just leaving his place talking about how she needed a shower. If that's not red-handed I don't know what is.”

“Tina probably said that just to get under my skin.”

My mother sucked her teeth. “Unbuckled pants. Unbuttoned shirt. Tina being there in the middle of the night while you weren't there. Need I go on?”

I wanted to say something in defense of Randy again, although I don't know why, but couldn't think of anything to counter my mother's breakdown. She was right: Tina's comment didn't really matter. I may not have had hard evidence, but the evidence I did have was good enough.

My mother mmm-hmm'd and gave me a you-know-I'm-right look. “Now you can stop wasting your time, baby, and find a man that's worthy of you. I know it's not an easy thing to accept, but the fact is, Randy just isn't as different as you thought he was. I think you need to admit to yourself that he may in fact be a housebroken dog, who never quite got the hang of not digging in the trash for snacks. I think—”

“Mom, I really don't want to hear anymore, okay? I don't mean to be rude, but let's face it . . . you're not going to win any citizenship awards for being nice to men.”

My mother sucked her teeth again. “Baby, as soon as men do something to earn my pleasantries, I'll change. But until then, they are out of luck.”

“You know you're only like that because of Dad.”

“Baby girl, don't you mention your father in this house, please.”

“Mom, not all men are like Dad. Not all men run around sleeping with any women they can, or sleeping with their wive's best friends.”

“No, baby, you're right. Not all men are filthy dogs like your father. Not all men go tramping around. But apparently Randy seems to be one of those men.”

I deformed my stress ball again as I thought about my mother's last comment. I really thought Randy was different. That he was incapable of falling into the pit of the trifling. But like my mom had said, how much more proof had I needed?

I paced, exhaled, and squeezed. Paced, exhaled, and squeezed. The more pacing I did, the more squeezing I did. The more squeezing I did, the angrier I became as pictures flashed in my mind.

Randy and Tina.

Tina smiling in my face as she walked past me.

Tina's comment about needing a shower.

Randy with his pants unbuckled, his zipper partly down, his shirt unbuttoned.

Randy with the look of guilt written all over his face.

Paced, exhaled, and squeezed. Paced, exhaled, and squeezed.

I wanted to replace the stress ball with Randy and Tina's necks, and wring them both until their eyes bulged out. Why did he have to hurt me like that? I knew he was incapable of putting Tina in her place, but actually sleeping with her? What's worse, Jalisa was there.

Paced, exhaled and squeezed. Paced, exhaled and squeezed.

I paced until my fingers got stiff, and my legs told me that it was time to sit my ass down. When I did, I grabbed my cell phone and turned it on. I'd turned it off after the thousandth time Randy had called me. It beeped, letting me know that I had a voice mail message. After the last two hundred he'd left, I had no doubt that it was another one from Randy.

Begging for a chance to explain.

Trying to convince me that he and Tina hadn't done anything.

Insisting that it was all a misunderstanding.

I took a deep breath and rubbed my temples. What if they hadn't done anything? What if I had misunderstood what I'd walked in on? Maybe I should hear him out. Maybe I should let him explain. I took another deep breath and squeezed my eyes tightly, trying to keep tears from falling.

What if?

I looked at my cell phone, contemplated
what if
again, and passed my fingers over the keypad.

What if?

But it was past two in the morning, and if a woman is leaving a man's place, and his clothing was in the condition like Randy's, there's only one thing they could have been doing.

The nerve of him to tell me that he loved me.

Tina. I hate that bitch. I hate that Randy let her come in between what we had. It wasn't fair. Why the hell couldn't he have been man enough to put a stop to her? I mean, if he loved me the way he said he did, wouldn't he have done that?

Bitch.

I pressed the button to delete all messages, cursed Randy out in my mind, let the tears that I just couldn't hold back any longer, fall, and asked myself one question: why the hell did I still love him?