In the Wind (12 page)

"Only if I get paid. I'm a big believer in the capitalistic system, meaning I don't do anything unless I get paid."

'How much do you want?"

"A dollar will do. I know you're poor."

"I'm not poor."

Colbie pats my cheek. "You're not rich. In my mind, that makes you poor. So can you afford a dollar or should I give you a discount?"

"Save some of that charm for the pretty boy fuckwit," I say, handing her a twenty.

Colbie shoves the bill in her top and smiles at me. "I'll give the change tomorrow. I know how every dollar counts for the impoverished."

I take her by the shoulders and direct her towards fuckwit. "Unleash all those compliments on him."

Colbie struts over to Sawyer and Pretty Boy Fuckwit. I suspect the fucker knows her well. I see fear in his expression when she appears. Sawyer listens to whatever Colbie is saying for about a minute before shooting me a dirty look. I smile back at her.

Leaving Colbie with her victim, Sawyer stomps over to me. "Why?"

"He's not your type."

"Oh, and you are?" she asks, crossing her arms and pushing her tits at me.

"I'm exactly your type. No one else comes close."

Sawyer's anger vanishes, and she smiles victorious at me.

"You got me to act like a jealous fuck. Big win there, Johansson."

"You're really hot when you get possessive, Todds."

Smiling at her, I lean down for a kiss. Sawyer gets spooked, backing away as if under attack.

"Wanna dance?" I ask, ignoring her fear.

"Not really."

"Want to eat free food?"

"No."

"Want to get drunk and make fun of people?"

Sawyer's face lights up. "Sure. Let's make sure to get a good view of Ellie crying."

"Who's Ellie?" I ask, walking with her to the bar.

"The guy I was talking to. His name is Elliot, but people call him Ellie."

"Country club types are weird."

"Yeah, and he's going to cry soon. Colbie had him scared before she opened her mouth."

We find a table near the bar and with a solid view of Colbie chatting with Ellie. He lasts five minutes before trying to escape. When she doesn't let him get away and continues talking casually, he lasts another five minutes before crying. Always the bitch, Colbie is positively shocked by his tears.

"Get this man some Midol!" she yells when he runs away.

Clinking our beers together, Sawyer and I laugh at the man's tears.

"We're dicks," I say.

"Yeah, he was harmless."

"No, he wasn't," Bodie says, appearing from a side door. "He's a nasty little twit. You didn't see that because your balls intimidated him. With a weaker chick, he'd have convinced her to debase herself."

"I do have big balls," Sawyer murmurs at me.

Bodie leaves us to go play with her sister. I see them joined eventually by Zane and Yesenia. The twins dance off and on. They get into loud arguments over cocktail weenies. More than once, their goal seems to be to embarrass their brother and his woman.

Sawyer and I remain at our table and away from the drama. Occasionally, people say hello to us. I sense they want to chat with the newcomers, but I frown hard at them. When that doesn't work, Sawyer gives them her death stare. She's scarier, and no one joins us.

Bodie passes me on the way out and whispers, "Remind me tomorrow to teach you how to be a man."

"Fuck off," I whisper back.

Grumpy now, I walk in the direction I think leads to the parking lot and end up in a back hallway instead. Sawyer follows me until I stop.

"I don't know where the hell we are."

Sawyer stares at me for maybe ten seconds before lunging into my arms. I feel as if I've been waiting all night for this moment. My lips find hers while her hips roll against my instant erection.

Voices startle us, but I refuse to stop. My hand reaches for a doorknob and opens an empty supply closet. Carrying her inside, I lean against the door so no one can interrupt us.

"Sawyer," I murmur against her lips.

"This doesn't mean anything except you look too fucking hot in this tux, and my pussy can't go so long without relief."

Pulling back, I'm shocked she wants sex here. Sawyer doesn't notice, too busy unzipping my slacks and finding my cock.

We sigh together. Leaning forward, I kiss her throat while cupping her ass. The body hugging dress slides up easily and her panties end up on the floor. I dip my finger between the lips of her pussy and find her surprisingly wet.

"I've been in a state of heat since you showed up in this fucking town," she says, sounding more angry than aroused. "Fuck me already."

If Sawyer's testing me, I likely fail. Unwilling to stop myself, I lift her onto my hips and reward my forever hard cock with relief in her warm pussy. Sawyer throws her head back, sighing in a pained way.

Sawyer yanks on my hair. "You look stupid," she growls, biting at my lip.

"Fuck off," I growl back, shoving up into her body harder.

Grimacing, she smiles and yanks on my hair again. I tug at her long curls, making her groan. Deeper, I thrust. Harder, I demand more of her pussy. Our hips slam together faster. My fingers dig into her ass when I feel her pussy spasming around my cock.

"You smiled at that fucker Ellie," I murmur, biting at her earlobe. "Fuck you for that."

Sawyer groans when I fuck her deeper. "You smiled at a lot of bitches," she says slapping me while bouncing wildly on my cock. "I hate you."

"I know," I groan, coming inside her.

"I'm not on birth control," she whispers in almost a threat.

"Don't fucking care," I say before covering her mouth with mine.

Our hips rolling every drop of pleasure out of our bodies, Sawyer kisses me hard. I wrap her in my arms and wish life were as simple as moments like this one. Just fuck and feel good. Be close without all the pressure outside this closet.

I want to stay in here forever, but I hear voices again. Sawyer hears them too, and slides off me. She leans down to find her panties and the one heel she lost while we fucked. I watch her bend over, and take in the sight of her tit nearly slipping out from a dress not created to remain on long.

"Put your dick away," she mutters, trying to sound angry.

"Grudgingly."

Sawyer glares at me as I slide my wet cock back into my slacks. Wiping a dab of her pussy juices from my cock, I suck it off my finger. She watches me, and I know she wants to fuck again. I could do her all night and never find true satisfaction. Nine months was a long time to go without her body at my fingertips.

"Don't talk to me for the rest of the night," she growls, opening the door to leave.

Shoving my fingers into her hair, I lean her head back and force her into a deep kiss. Sawyer doesn't fight me, again wanting more than a five-minute fuck in a closet. When I release her, she stares at me with confused eyes.

"I'm going to fuck you again."

"Not tonight."

"Maybe but soon."

Sawyer shivers before storming down the hallway. I follow her until we reach the front hall where the party continues. I see the twins laughing at Zane who dramatically throws a bottle on the floor in reaction. They laugh louder, and he joins them. Whatever game they're playing, the rest of the party looks worried.

Zane takes Yesenia's hand and strolls past us. The departing twins wave at the crowd of relieved partygoers. Sawyer hurries after the siblings. I watch her ass wiggle in the dress and remember how much sexier it was wrapped around her waist.

The ride home involves the twins singing very loudly to what I think is a country song. I can't even hear the radio playing. Don't care anyway. My mind is on Sawyer two feet from me. I wonder if she can still feel me inside her. If she doesn't, I suspect she will again soon enough.

"Staying over?" Colbie asks when we arrive at the house.

"No, I better get back to my hotel room for clean clothes."

"Tomorrow, just move here. Won't be long before Sawyer decides to go back to Ellsberg. Why waste the money while you wait?"

"I'm not going back," Sawyer snaps.

"Sure, Queen Cranky."

The twins disappear somewhere in the house, leaving Sawyer and me alone in the main hall.

"I guess I could move my crap here until Cooper accepts you're not going home."

"I'm not."

"I know."

"Cooper and you can't make me."

"I know."

Sawyer's anger fades until she seems more frustrated than anything else. "Tonight didn't mean shit, so don't come back tomorrow thinking you're getting laid again."

Sawyer hurries down the hallway, but never reaches the kitchen. I pin her to the wall and frown down at her.

"Sawyer Johansson is afraid of a lot of things. Butterflies, for one."

"They're deceptively evil."

"True, but she shouldn't be afraid of giving me a good night kiss."

"I don't want to kiss you ever again."

My hands are at each side of her shoulders, but she tries to duck under. I block her with my knee.

"I want to go to bed."

"You know how to make that happen."

Even though I feel waves of uncertainty rolling off her, Sawyer is too damn stubborn to admit her fear. Lifting her lips, she does her best to act indifferent.

I lower my lips and kiss her softly. We're years passed our first gawky kiss when I was lucky not to choke her with my tongue. I know her now. Know myself better too. I give her a tiny bit of heat, sucking slightly on her soft lips. My tongue wants to play too, but I keep myself under control.

Sawyer doesn't.

Her hands grip my hair, pulling me tighter. Her lips spread and her tongue searches for mine. I don't know where the kiss will lead or how far it might go, but we're interrupted by Zane's arrival home. Stepping away from her, I cup her face and caress her hungry lips with my thumb.

"You're the only woman I ever dream about," I whisper.

"We'll see."

I leave before Sawyer has a chance to find her courage again. My second chance is in reach, but I fear fucking it up. Sawyer is all I've ever wanted. Yet, I ran away before. I just pray I can keep myself from doing it again.

Sawyer

Drive By

After his Harley roars away and the taillights disappear into the dark night, I think to take a shower and wash off the feel of our quickie in the closet. I even turn on the water and undress. Sitting on the toilet, I feel like crying, but I don't.

Fuck Jace!

My skin crawls with desire and the throbbing need between my legs nearly drives me insane. I know from experience how a cold shower won't do a thing to help. When I crave Jace, nothing less than his body will do.

Exercise helps. Sugar too. Booze is a real tonic. Yet they only distract from what I want.

Turning off the water, I accept I'm not ready to wash away the scent of him on my body. I wanted to fuck tonight, and I got fucked. No shame in enjoying Jace's body. No harm in finding pleasure after nine months alone.

Heading downstairs, I hope to run into the twins, but they're not in any of the normal places. While the house has a basement and several floors I haven't visited, I'm not in the mood to get lost searching for them.

I consider swimming laps or working out in the gym. Instead, I search for something sugary to eat in the kitchen. Settling on a quart of chocolate chip ice cream, I sit at the giant island and embrace the happiness found in empty calories.

I hear shuffling moving towards the kitchen. My time with the twins making me paranoid, I reach for my gun. JJ appears at the doorway with a rifle slung over his shoulder. He enters as if knowing I was there. Glancing around, I wonder for the millionth time if the place is rigged with cameras.

"Ice cream out of the container. Someone had a tough day."

Nodding, I take another scoop while he joins me at the island.

"Why are you down, kid?"

"A lot of little things, but I miss my dad mostly. With him around, everything made more sense."

"I was the youngest in the family too," JJ says, dipping his spoon into the ice cream container. "Not so much younger than the others like you, but my dad was more interested in being a father by the time I came along. He and I were close. Best friends in many ways. He lived here until he died the last time."

"The last time?"

"Died three times. First two times, he came back. Not as a zombie, of course. Trust me, we checked. It was as if he headed up to the pearly gates and decided he wasn't ready. That or they kicked his ass back down. Either way, he lived here until the end. His death was four years ago, and the house still feels empty even with so many people staying here."

"I still lived with my parents before moving here."

"Will your mom be okay alone?"

"She's not alone. She has my brothers and sister plus the grandkids. Lots of friends too."

"That's good. I was lonely after my dad died. In fact, I refused to let the kids leave. Even locked them in the padded room for a few days, so they wouldn't be too far out of my sight."

I think to ask about the padded room, and decide I'm too depressed to deal with more crazy.

"I guess I wanted things to stay the same after Pop died, but everyone moved on really fast. They all have things to do. Jobs and kids. My mom decided to go on a cruise. People get over death too fast."

"Or they pretend to get over it better than we do."

"Maybe."

We take turns scooping spoonfuls of ice cream. I know JJ isn't my dad, and I don't get a fatherly vibe off him. I do feel his grief. Even after all these years, he still misses his dad. Right or wrong, we share a need to hold on tightly to what we've lost.

"The Jace boy is yours, correct?"

"He used to be."

"It's difficult to want someone who doesn't want the same things."

Nodding, I take another scoop. JJ's hazel eyes get thoughtful.

"I have loved a lot of women. Ironically, the kids' mom wasn't one of them.
The women I loved
always ran away because I was never enough for them. Oh, they claimed living out here with my kids and the nannies was too hard for them. I figured if they loved me enough, the rest wouldn't matter."

Setting down my spoon, I feel freakishly tired. "Jace is messed up. His parents were murdered, and he was there when they died. He had therapy and a good adopted family, but he's still messed up. I know he wants me, but he wanted me years ago and still left. How can I trust a man like that?"

"You can't," JJ says. "Or maybe you can. I don't know. Once things end with a woman, I find another woman or I don't. I never spend much time worrying over the last woman. She left me, so I figure she must be flawed not to want me."

I grin. "Do you think Zane and Yesenia will last?"

"Sure. As long as his sisters don't kill her. So in that case, no."

"Why kill her?"

"Yesenia hates horror movies and country music. She spells Lynyrd Skynyrd wrong. The poor girl has no chance. Besides, she's dull. How can she survive in a family where everyone is always wondering what they can blow up next?"

"True."

"I don't know about this Jace boy. He might be able to commit, and you two could be very happy. Just don't be like Bodie," JJ says, suddenly very serious. "Don't waste your life waiting for a man who is never going to stick with you. Give the bastard a deadline. If he won't make his feelings clear by then, cut his ass loose and move on. No matter how painful it is, don't waste your youth."

Excited to hear gossip, I lean forward. "Who is Bodie waiting for?"

"I don't know," JJ says, and I believe him. "I know she doesn't date since the first time she had sex. I've heard the squirting in her hair story."

"She told you that?"

"No. I sneak around the house a lot, eavesdropping," he says, giving me a wink. "My daughter has one sexual experience and swears off men. Only two reasons for that to happen. One is she was traumatized and is too afraid to try again. Two is she fell hard for the guy and is waiting for him. Since Bodie isn't capable of feeling fear or being traumatized, she's waiting."

I try to imagine Bodie so horrified by sex she can never get close to a man again. Seems unlikely but no more so than her waiting for some guy. Besides, who would trust their dick to her? Though I get jealous at the thought of her and Jace together, I know she'd scare him off long before they ever reached the kissing phase, let alone fucking.

"I won't wait forever," I say quietly.

"No one thinks they will. Forever just sneaks up on you."

Nodding, I could easily wait for Jace forever. "I'll pick a deadline."

"The heart is weak, and it lies. Look at Zane. He sees none of the problems waiting for him and his girl. He only sees her perfection and his happiness. My heart lied to me plenty of times. Your heart might be lying to you too. Or maybe it knows a secret. Always tricky to tell."

Frustrated by his lack of tough love, I take a big scoop of ice cream. JJ studies me and nods at an unspoken thought.

"With Jace, you'll need to either take a dump or get off the pot. It's what Kirk would do. He took what he wanted and remained loyal to those deserving of it. Yet he didn't linger on something not worth saving."

Mouth full of ice cream, I smile. JJ and Pop only met a few times over the years. They weren't much alike. Even strangers, JJ knows my father well enough for me to feel like Pop is in the room with us. I can imagine him telling me to stop being a scared little girl and take what's mine.

My heart's weak and my mind lost in grief, but my gut knows the truth.