And then I caught myself. I’d been imagining it for years…and never in that time had anyone else ever been in the picture.
“I mean…you know. If you think that would work with…us,” I said.
He frowned in confusion and then stared at me. “Karen…Jesus, you don’t have to ask my permission!” He sighed and traced my cheek with a finger. “You’ve spent so long doing what everybody else wants. It’s okay to do what
you
want. I’d never stop you following your dreams. You do what you need to do, and we’ll figure out
us.”
It was like a rush of pure oxygen after being cooped up in a tiny box my whole life. I wanted to throw my arms around him and kiss him right there in the restaurant…and then I went ahead and did exactly that, just to show I understood.
***
The movie was a romantic comedy, fun and simple and immediately forgettable. I was surprised that he’d pick something so tame and…
normal,
but cuddling up beside him, his arm around my shoulders, I didn’t care what we watched. I kept looking across at him, his face lit by the screen’s glow, and thinking
he’s mine.
It was only in the bar he took me to, afterwards, that it started to make sense. It was perfect—not too dressy and not too casual. In my dress and the smarter-than-usual jeans he’d worn, we could have been an advertising poster for the place.
“You’ve never been here before, have you?” I asked as he brought the drinks over. “Or the restaurant. And you don’t normally go to the movies, do you?”
He gave me a long look and then hung his head and said, “Clarissa. They were all her suggestions. I had no fucking idea where to take you.”
I burst out laughing. “What do you
normally
do on dates?”
He held out his hands helplessly. “I don’t
go
on dates. You know what I’m like.” He looked abashed. “What I
was
like.”
I narrowed my eyes, smirking. “You play some rock club, and there’s some young thing at the front, all innocent and big eyes, and you play a solo she thinks is just for her. And then you get her back to your dressing room, ravish her on the counter and both of you get drunk on cheap beer.”
“Did you really just say
ravish?”
My face went hot, but I was grinning. “Don’t try to change the subject! Is that accurate?”
He looked everywhere but my face. “…yeah. Pretty much. That’s how I met Ruth.”
I nodded quickly—I didn’t want to talk about her. “And tonight? That was…?”
“That was me trying to give you the perfect date. How did I do?”
I smiled. “Perfect. But next time, if you want to take me to some place with…you know, a mosh pit and beer all over the floor…that’d be fine too.”
“I think it’s just possible that this is going to work out.”
He finished his drink, and I realized I’d finished mine. We sat there looking at the empty glasses, neither of us wanting to be the one to say it.
At last, he said, “Would you like….”
“…to go to my apartment?” I finished.
He stared into my eyes. “Like you wouldn’t believe.”
***
We were kissing before we even got in the door, turning around and around as we moved down the hall as if we were dancing, our lips never separating for an instant. It was as if we’d been starved of each other all the months we’d worked together, straining at chains that had finally been released.
We fell onto the couch, the same one I’d watched him sleep on what felt like years ago. I was on top, kissing down his neck as his hands roamed over my back, smoothing the jersey dress over my body. His large hands cupped my ass and I drew in a long breath, my whole body trembling at his touch. One of his knees parted mine, rough denim against smooth nylon, and then we were scissored together, kissing long and deep as his hands rubbed my thighs, the edges of his hands nudging my dress higher and higher. When it reached my stocking tops and his hands touched bare flesh, he froze and lifted me—easily—so he could look down at my legs, then grinned with delight at what he saw. I had a little warm rush of pride.
Score one to Jasmine.
He rolled us over, and then I was looking up at him, running my hand over the stubble on his cheek, stroking through his soft, feathery hair. His hands skimmed up my hips, my stomach…I groaned as he lightly squeezed my breasts. Pleasure arced between them, joining and flowing straight down between my legs, and I squirmed beneath him. My hair was fanned out around me like a halo and he smoothed it against the cushions with his fingertips.
“You’re perfect,” he whispered. “I knew it when I saw you on the steps.”
“I was lucky,” I told him. “Lucky you saved me.”
He gave me one of those smiles. “Not that lucky. I knew what was going to happen when I opened that door.”
My eyes went wide, more delighted than angry. “It was
deliberate?!”
“To tell you the truth,” he said, “I was hoping you’d be a little more grateful.”
I thumped him on the arm and he chuckled, and then I was twisting us back around so that he was on the bottom, and unfastening his jeans. My breath was coming fast now, my fingers clumsy at the belt buckle. He raised himself up on his elbows as I pulled his jeans down, lifting his tight ass so I could free them. I could see the bulge of his cock beneath his black jockey shorts, and took a deep breath….
And then I was hooking my fingers into the waistband and dragging them down, forcing my face to remain neutral. I had to pretend I’d seen lots of erect cocks before. I was absolutely
not
going to gasp, or go wide-eyed—
I gasped, and felt my eyes widen.
It was beautiful: thick and smooth with a glossy, arrow-shaped head. It leapt upright as I freed it, and the first thing I thought was that it was bigger than my dildo—the only thing I had to compare it to. And dildos didn’t throb, I realized as I gripped the shaft, or twitch in your hand. It was so
alive,
so part of him. I’d been thinking of it as almost a thing on its own…I hadn’t really thought of it as being a part of Connor, that
he
would be right up inside my body.
I was glad Jasmine had told me to do it this way. I needed the time, needed the build-up. Maybe she’d known that.
“Are you sure?” asked Connor quickly, as he saw me lower my head.
I looked at him for a second and nodded. I was nervous, but I couldn’t stop smiling at the idea of giving him pleasure.
I was kneeling astride his legs, one hand wrapped around the root of him to stop him springing upwards. I went to lick him, but just the touch of my breath on him was enough to make him gasp so I did it again, a little sigh of hot air that stroked his sensitive flesh. Then I was tasting him, a hint of salt and delicious male musk, but the thing I wasn’t ready for was how warm he was, the incredible intimacy of that hot, pulsing flesh against my tongue.
I wanted to taste all of him, to know all of him, and I started licking down his length, slathering him until he shone. I saw his hands lift and close into fists, tight little gasps as my tongue teased his already hard cock to the straining, throbbing limit.
I took him in my mouth and sucked as Jasmine had shown me, and he arched his back and pushed with his groin, wanting more of him inside me. I worked at it with my cheeks and tongue, enveloping as much of him as I could in soft, hot wetness. I wasn’t ready to try any deeper, but I suddenly
got
the idea of deep throating. I would have done, if I could. I wanted all of him.
His hand plunged into my hair, lifting me. “Stop there,” he said quickly, and I climbed off him. He hitched up his jeans and then, to my delight, he scooped me up, lifting me with a hand under my legs and another under my back. As he carried me through to the bedroom, my heart boomed louder with every step he took. He kicked the door closed behind him and dropped me on the bed. I sprawled there on my back, looking up at him.
It was completely different to my dream in every conceivable way. And yet perfect.
“Take off your dress.” His voice almost a growl. I could hear the blood rushing in my ears and my breath came in tight, shallow pants as I hauled the dress up around my hips…my waist…my breasts. Watching his eyes on me, seeing him drink in my body as it was revealed, sent a rush of heat straight down to my groin and I could feel it turning to slick readiness there. The dress came up and over my head and I threw it aside.
His eyes devoured me as he pulled off his shirt and kicked off his jeans and boots. Naked, he seemed even bigger; when he climbed onto the bed, one knee between my legs, I felt a sudden wave of delicious dread. I was tiny beneath him, the helpless innocent about to be ravaged. I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to follow all of Jasmine’s advice—suddenly, I just wanted to be
taken.
Connor stretched out on top of me, kissing down the valley of my breasts, his hands skimming along my bare sides. Every inch of skin he touched seemed to light up in their wake, my whole body coming alive. His mouth was hot at my shoulder, my neck…God, at my ear….
I explored his back with my hands, tracing the muscles I’d wanted to touch since I’d first seen him strip his t-shirt off backstage. Again and again, I followed the hard lines of him down from his wide shoulders to that tight, trim waist…and then, at last, I let my palms slide down to his ass, the firm muscles flexing each time he moved. I wound my legs around him—
He winced, looking down behind him, and I saw I’d just dug one of the Killer Heels into his leg. I quickly unfastened them and kicked them off, figuring they’d served their purpose, and he smiled.
I was barely aware of him sliding one hand down my bare stomach until his fingers slipped under my panties. And then I gasped as he cupped me there, fingertips firm and questing against lips that were already moist. He twisted his hand, his palm grinding against my clit, and a finger slid into me. I gulped for air, hands reaching up above me to grasp at the pillows, hips arching off the bed as he plunged his finger deep and started to move it, my body clenching around him. I reached up and slid my hand around his cock, stroking his shaft in time with his thrusting finger, and as I felt him speed up I knew I’d got it right.
He put one hand under my shoulder and lifted me, and I half sat up. His fingers unclipped my bra and he let me flop back to the bed, pushing it away from my breasts. I lay there staring up at him, worried for a second about what he’d think of me.
He moved his head close, brushing a lock of hair off my cheek. “You’re gorgeous,” he said. “Gorgeous breasts.” A hot little thrill spiraled through me. Then his mouth was on my breast, lips spread wide and tongue working at the nipple and I cried out in shock at the pleasure that arced through me. I came seconds later when he slid a second finger into me, his teeth biting lightly at my hardened nipple. He gazed down at me, our eyes locked together, as I thrashed and bucked, and for once I wasn’t embarrassed at all. I could see him relishing my ecstasy; he loved the fact that he’d made me lose control and so did I.
He drew back a little and I let his cock slip from my hand. I watched as he slid my panties down my legs and off, and I pulled my bra the rest of the way off. As it fell to the floor, it seemed to mark something—I was naked, except for the hold ups, naked and ready for him, ready for—
I twisted and pulled open the drawer next to my bed. All four boxes of condoms were sitting there, cellophane removed and lids bent back. I looked at him questioningly.
He blinked a couple of times. “I’m not fussy,” he said at last.
I passed him one and he ripped open the foil packet. As he rolled it on, his cock seemed even bigger. I could feel myself breathing deeper, looking up into his eyes as I let my knees loll apart….
He stopped and cocked his head to one side. “Wait….” As if sensing something.
I shook my head. “Go on.”
He glanced at the condom selection in the drawer, then at the discarded Killer Heels. “Karen, is it…your first time?”
I thought of about a thousand things to say. And then I just nodded.
“You’re sure you want to?” he asked quietly.
“God yes.” The hunger in my voice was all he needed to hear. He slid forward on the bed, one thick forearm braced beside my head, and guided himself into me.
God…so thick and so hot, and so unlike the dildo, hard and soft in exactly the right way. The head stretched me, opening me up. I wanted him, but the size of him made me gasp…and then the head was in, my body closing around him in a way that made me catch my breath, and he was biting his lip at the feeling of me around him. He started to move, slow strokes, watching my reaction to check it was okay. But all I felt was pleasure, the liquid friction of him starting a spiraling rush of heat that twisted faster and faster. My hands found his ass, feeling the muscles there move as he thrust into me, each one taking him deeper, until he was rooted in me.
He stopped for a second, brushing the hair back from my forehead and I realized I was damp there. My whole body was trembling, a sheen coating me. He brought his other arm down beside my head, then, and settled fully on top of me, and I brought my knees up. Staring deep into my eyes, he started to fuck me, each thrust pulling him almost from me before driving in to my limits. The spiraling heat twisted faster and faster and my hands clutched at his ass, the feel of his body stroking against my stockinged thighs cementing the reality of what was happening. He sped up and his groin slapped hard against me, grinding against my clit as his cock hammered into me. I felt the heat inside build beyond any chance of control and as I felt my own body start to spasm and clutch at him, I saw his muscles bunch, his jaw tense.