In Embers (The Ember Series Book 3) (10 page)

BOOK: In Embers (The Ember Series Book 3)
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SEVENTEEN: REALITY BITES

 

~ Love Remains The Same: Gavin Rossdale ~

 

6:01 p.m.

 

Sunset was only minutes away and Sam and I decided we should get back soon. Walking with her back to the car she pulled from me, leaving me standing with a confused look upon my face and my guitar dangling from my hand.

“Sam?”

“Hang on, I thought I saw something,” she said. She climbed into the thick wall of bamboo a few yards off the main path. She was rooting around for something in the tangled grass at the base of the bamboo stalks. After a few seconds she called out in excitement.

“Oh my God!”

“What’s wrong?” I asked, running up to her. She reached for me with one hand while cradling something in her other hand. It was small enough to fit in her fist. “Sam, what is it?”

Almost panting with nerves, s
he smiled. “I thought I’d never see this again.”

“See what.”

Carefully she revealed a small silver trinket inside her hand…a whistle. She rubbed the excess dirt off of it by rolling it around in her palm with her fingers. One of her fingers rested on a small detail cut into the metal.

“A whistle?” I asked.

She nodded up to me before sliding it between her lips and blowing softly. A thin shriek escaped it, echoing through the forest of bamboo.

Smiling my way, she said, “Yes. I thought I lost this.”

“Lost a whistle? I’m confused…”

“Max, a few weeks before you moved to Maui I was spending the afternoon taking photos of the bamboo trail. I met a young family who had a little boy whose hobby was collecting whistles.” Scratching her head in thought, she whispered, “I think they were from Tennessee. Anyways, I took the little guys picture and he offered me a gift. This whistle.”

I watched her closely. There seemed to be more to the story, but she wasn’t going into detail. I figured I wouldn’t push it to find out.

“A
whistle.” I smiled.

Slowly, she handed it over to me.
“Take a peek,” she dared.

“Why?”

“Just look,” she insisted.

I glared down at the small instrument, letting it roll in-between my thumb and index finger. Suddenly, a small but unique detail became apparent. Crafted into the soft metal was a burst of flames. Silver fire, still holding stains and smudges from being lost in the muck for so long.

“Fire whistle,” I whispered.

“Exactly.” Sam stepped up to me and took the whistle back into her hands. “I guess it was a sign.” She looked at me from the corner of her eyes.

“Or a warning,” I teased. A nervous roll of my stomach made me uncomfortable.

Sam propped up on her toes of her feet and kissed me on the cheek. Her free hand slid around mine.
“Come on. Let’s go see our daughter.” She smiled up at me.

 

Sam and I drove back to her house with the music from the stereo serenading us. We hardly spoke the entire way back. She sat quietly, staring at the little treasure she had found. I tried to settle my racing thoughts as I drove, but found them overpowering. As we pulled into Sam’s driveway, Kai was already waiting for us.

“Great,” I mumbled.

Sam pretended not to hear me and exited the car as I turned the motor off. Oz came running up toward the car as I stepped from it, his fuzzy paws slammed into my shins, and he greeted me with a happy bark.

“King Oz! How was your visit with Uncle Kai?” I asked him, looking over at Kai.

Kai frowned and found Sam quickly. They ran into the house and arguing ensued. I placed Oz in the car and walked up to the front door. With a faint knock on the doorframe, I interrupted them.

“Can I see Madi?” I asked, but it sounded more like a polite order. Kai shot me a hard look and walked up to me. Sam ran into the other room and returned to us with Madison in her arms. She was asleep and drooling.

Kai suggested, “Maybe another time, Max. She just fell asleep.” His tone was soft but I didn’t like the way he was talking to me. Madi was my daughter, not his.

“Kai, Max can see his daughter anytime he wants,” Sam corrected. She definitely had a tone in her voice. Kai crossed his arms in disappointment.

“Thank you, Sam, but he’s right. She needs her rest.” I reached out and ran my hand down Madison’s back. She was radiating a familiar heat and covered in a muggy sweat. I wasn’t sure if I could be the father I needed to be anyways. The fear was almost paralyzing at times. “They’ll be plenty of time to see her,” I added.

Kai looked at me surprised. Sam nodded my way and turned to return Madi back to her bedroom. Swiftly, I placed a small kiss on Madi’s round head. Her brown curls tickled my nose and she smelled like baby-lotion and strawberries. She squirmed in Sam’s arms as I kissed her, making me smile.

In a soft whisper, Sam said, “I’ll be right back.” She disappeared down the hallway of her house and Kai focused on me.

“Bro, we need to talk.”

“No kidding.” I walked back out the front door, and he followed. “You really think taking Sam and Madi away from me is a good idea, Kai? Am I that horrible?”

“Max, you’re not horrible at all. I was offered an opportunity to start my life in Seattle and when I told Sam, she asked if Madi and her were welcome to come with me. I said yes. I never intended to hurt you. You’re my brother. I love you, man,” he smiled under his wild hair.

“After all we’ve been through…” I started to say, but stopped myself.

“It was Sam’s decision to move.”

“What?” I couldn’t believe him.

“I’m not going to lie, I love them, Bro.”

His words felt like a punch to the face, but I couldn’t blame him. After everything I had said and done since meeting Sam and Kai, he’s always protected both of us. Was it really his fault that he fell for Sam when I was off seeing the world with Asia? Sam’s amazing. So easy to fall in love with. I searched his eyes for another moment, and I knew he was telling me the truth.

“I know you do, Kai. I can’t hate you for how you feel,” I said, placing a hand on his shoulder. “But, I can’t let them go. I need them in my life.”

Kai sulked and looked me directly in my eyes. “What about Asia?”

And just then, my cell phone came alive, and it was Asia’s face that popped across the screen. I exhaled and answered the phone.

“I can’t talk now.”

Asia spoke quickly, “Max, I need you.”

Frustrated, I said, “Not right now.” At that moment, Sam appeared behind Kai with a curious look on her face. She knew immediately who I was talking to.

Turning from both of them, I mumbled, “I’ll call you later.”

“There won’t be a later!” Asia warned.

“What do you mean?”

Asia took a moment before answering. “I have to protect the girls. I can’t protect them here.”

“Can we talk about this later,” I insisted. Thunder roared in the background of the phone line, and a few seconds later it rumbled over the top of us.

“Come over tonight,” Asia insisted. From behind me, Sam walked up and placed a hand on my arm.

Unsure and trapped, I said, “I can’t. Not tonight.”

“Why not?” Asia cursed.

“Tomorrow, I’ll be there first thing tomorrow,” I promised. Instantly, the line went dead
.
Crap
.
Asia was upset. Taking a large breath of air into my lungs, I slid my phone back in my pocket and turned toward Sam and Kai.

Kai looked through me, “That’s what I thought.” He shook his head and walked back into the house. I wearily found Sam’s stare.

“Is it true?” I asked her.

“Was that…her?” she asked, ignoring my question. In that horrible moment I could see everything changed inside of her again.

“Yes,” I choked. “Is it true that you’re the one who decided it would be best to leave with Kai?”

She pulled from me slowly. “Yes.” Tears pooled in her eyes again, and she began to fade from me.

“Do you still feel that way? I mean, after this afternoon, do you still want to leave?” I was afraid to ask it, but I needed to know. She stepped back from me and my heart sank. Her eyes washed over in confusion, but her body language spoke volumes.

“Sam, is there still time to work things out?”

With fresh tears streaming down her cheeks, she wilted, “I don’t know.” She ran back into the house and closed the door in a soft slam. I returned to the car and placed myself behind the wheel. As I put the car in gear I noticed something tucked safely inside the slot just under the stereo. A silver twinkle revealed what it was before I snatched it up. The fire whistle.

“Maybe it was a warning,” I said to Oz, who was watching me, waiting to leave. I patted him on his head and drove off.

 

I should have drove straight for the island’s peer, straight to Asia, but I was spent. Emotionally used up. When she called again on the way home I ignored my phone. I was so confused. I didn’t know what I wanted anymore. All I knew for sure was I couldn’t lose my daughter. I couldn’t say goodbye to Sam. I was also terrified of Asia not being in my life again. Trapped in this hurricane of feelings I walked into my house, not even acknowledging my mother and locked myself in my bedroom. Asia kept trying to call me but I turned my phone off. Oz spent the night at the foot of my bed, guarding his troubled owner. The last thing I remembered is his comical snoring lulling me to sleep.

 

 

 

 

EIGHTEEN: BLINDSIDED

 

~ Running: No Doubt ~

 

Thursday - 8:59 a.m. - January 5
th

 

Waking to the sound of my daughter squealing above me was one of the greatest memories of my life. Scratching at the crud in my eyes to be sure I wasn’t dreaming, I awoke to the best surprise.

“Madi?” I asked, as she dangled just above my face. Sam was holding her above me and Madi’s little arms reached for my nose and cheeks. She had a big smile and a giggle for me.

“Wake up, Daddy…” Sam said, playfully. I sat up in my bed and wrapped my arms around my baby girl. What were they doing here? As I kissed Madi on the cheek, I glanced over at Sam. She watched us smiling, but you could tell she was struggling with something.

“Sam.
” I smiled.

She sat down next to me on my bed. Her sleep deprived eyes glanced over at my cell phone that lay turned off on my desktop. “Max, I wanted to apologize for the way things ended last night.”

Trying not to yawn, “You have nothing to apologize for,” I said.

“Yes, I do.” Sam leaned into me slightly, but she felt far away. “After the amazing day we spent lost in the hidden forest of bamboo, after everything you told me…”

“What is it, Sam?”

“We’re moving. Madison and I are going to Seattle with Kai.” Sam wiped away a small tear on the edge of her cheek, and my world started to slow down, again. A rush of images and words seized my brain, bringing with it a morning headache. All of them of Sam and I. All of them vivid and true. A million questions danced around my skull
, but I settled with the easiest one to get out at the moment.

Holding Madi closer to me, I asked, “Why?”

“Max…” she tried to stall.

“Sam, please, why do you have to leave?”

“Gravity.”

“Huh?” I whispered.

“With you Max there is no ground, nowhere for my toes to grasp. There is only the sky. There is only the soaring truth of your love. Our love. You make me feel like I’m flying…” Sam paused.

“And that’s bad?” I pushed.

“It is when I fall back to earth.” Her green eyes dared me to look away from them. I couldn’t. She continued, slowly. “Gravity, Max. Our love is like gravity. No matter how high we fly together, we will come crashing back down. Well, I crash…you have a safety net,” she scolded, firmly. I assumed she meant Asia. I choked down a fresh lump in my throat and inhaled a quick hint of my daughter’s settling smell.

“Safety nets,” I repeated, without realizing I had said it.

“I can’t keep crashing, Max. It’s killing me.”

Sam started to cry and stood up slowly. I watched her hard, holding Madi as tightly as I could without hurting her. Her warm heat filled my arms and chest with safety.

“There has to be something we can do to figure this out. There has to be an answer,” I pleaded.

“There is,” she agreed, turning from me. “For me to leave this island and spend my life with the second greatest love of my life…Kai.”

Ouch, that felt like a flamethrower to the heart. My temper quickly showed up.

“You love him?”

“Yes.”

“But not like me. No one can love you like I do. Our love is real, Sam,” I almost cursed at her. She turned and looked at me upset by my words.

With a new resolve in her voice, she spoke calmly, “Sometimes, that’s just not enough.”

“But…” I started to say.

“We leave tomorrow on the last flight in the evening. I came here this morning to let you have the day with Madison. Tomorrow, we start our new lives.” Sam walked out of my room and I chased after her with Madi in my grip.

“Sam…please…”

“Don’t worry, you’ll still get to see Madison on some of the holidays, and I’m sure she’ll love her summers with her dad on the island…” her voice fell away. She was sobbing. I stepped close enough to reach out and touch her, but she darted out the front door of the house and ran to her car. I watched her through the living room window as she started up her car and drove away. If it hadn’t been for my daughter in my arms, I would have fell over in pieces.

“Sam,” I sighed. It finally happened. I had spent too much time running in circles, chasing my burning heart. Sam made the decision that I could never seem to do.

She chose Kai.

 

The rest of the morning went by slowly with my emotions in a fog. Madison kept me busy though, running and playing hide and seek, her favorite game. Though, she wasn’t very good at it. Everywhere she hid she would reveal with her sweet giggle. I made her lunch, a bottle of milk and applesauce. She decided to wear most of it on her lips and cheeks. A bath and a song followed. Then I sang for her with my acoustic guitar and she spun in little circles with her arms up in the air to keep her balance. It made me love her even more and I wasn’t sure how I would get through life without her by my side. I continued to play music for her no matter how depressed it was making me. I played one final song, a song I had written especially for her, even though it took everything I had left emotionally to do it. My world was crashing around me, but I couldn’t let Madi see my sorrow. Not now. Not with what little time I had left with her.

Thankfully, my mother joined me halfway through the day. Sam had given her the heads up on the move and my mother made a point to be with her granddaughter as much as possible this final visit. For once, I was happy my mother was here. At one point, the heaviness of the situation had gotten the best of me and I came crashing down to earth. Gravity, as Sam put it, was a bitch. My mother held Madi until she fell asleep for a nap while I tried to collect myself in the backyard. I wouldn’t had made it through the night without her.

Sitting at the old weathered bench under some trees, I stared at my uncle’s old barbecue grill and missed him something awful.

“Uncle, what the hell do I do now?” I asked it. The wind stirred inside the gated yard and I let the smell of the air calm me. With my eyes closed I inhaled a long breath. When I opened my eyes back up, Frank was there. Sitting directly across from me on the bench.

“Aloha, Son,

he said, gleefully.

“Uncle?” I spoke winded.

“How’s it going?”

“Sam and Madi are leaving,” I mumbled. My uncle’s ghost settled into the seat and took a moment before speaking again.

“Well, that kinda sucks.

He smiled. Leave it to Uncle Frank to put it that way.

“It sure does.”

“What can I do to help?”

“Umm…I don’t know, you’re kinda dead,” I teased. A smile almost made it to my lips too.

“Ha, ha, ha, ha,

he chuckled and slapped the table with his hand
.
“I’ve missed your jokes, Max.”

“I miss you too, Uncle.” I let out a sigh and placed my head on the table. “How come you only show up when I’m dealing with the impossible?”

“Because that’s when you need me the most,

he chuckled. His silhouette began to fade and it made me lurch back up, quickly.

“Are you leaving already? But, I need you. I need your guidance,” I begged, as he started to vanish.

“Trust the pain…

he reminded me again
.
Ugh
!
I was so sick of hearing that.

“Trust her.”

“Who?” I screamed out, but it was too late. Frank faded to nothing before my eyes and I slammed my fist on the table in frustration. Suddenly, I noticed that the sun was setting and I had spent the entire afternoon outside. Where had the time gone? Was I going insane?

The wind blew harder and carried along with it one final message from my uncle…

“The signs are everywhere.”

“Great,” I scolded myself. Jumping up, I ran back inside and found my mother waiting in the kitchen for me. She looked worried but relieved.

“Good, you’re awake.” She smiled.

“Awake? You mean I fell asleep?” I asked, confused.

“Yes. For the last couple hours. I was going to wake you up, but I figured you needed the rest. I know you had a stressful morning,” she said.

“Oh, you know about that, huh?”

“Samantha filled me in yesterday morning about the move. I’m sorry, Max. I really am,” she said cautiously, waiting for me to get upset with her.

Giving her as much of a smile as I could muster, I looked toward the house. “How’s Madi?”

“She’s still sleeping.”

“She is?”

“Like father, like daughter,” she laughed.

It brought a much needed laugh to my chest. I took a moment and watched my mother while a fresh headache began to push at my temples. Without even thinking about it, I walked up to her and placed a kiss on her forehead and squeezed her with one arm.

“Thanks…Mom…”

She froze, and placed a hand over her chest. “Anytime, Max.” Her smile was massive and she placed a hand on my forearm.

“Do you have any aspirin? I feel a migraine coming on and I’d prefer to spend the last few hours with Madi in the least amount of pain as possible,” I said, rubbing the back of my head with one hand.

“Of course, in my purse…over there, on the counter,” she said, pointing behind me. Madi called from my room as she awoke from her slumber. My mother was right, we were just like one another. My mother excused herself to check on Madi while I turned to the counter and found the small white bottle of pills. With a quick gulp, I dry-swallowed two pills and winced as they went down. When I placed the bottle back in her purse I noticed that the purse was resting on top of a pad of paper with a message on it. It was Sam’s handwriting.

“Oh my God…” I grumbled, and picked up the pad of paper. It read…

 

——————————————

Detective Steele called.

Please return her call

at 555-1836

 

Sam

——————————————

 

My heart stopped and my head thundered with fresh pain.
Trust the pain,
I thought. Was this a sign? I ripped the piece of paper from the pad and stuck it in my back pocket. Just then Madi stumbled into the kitchen with a crinkled blanket in her arms and her hair a mess of curls.

“Dada!” she squealed. I picked her up, ignoring the throbbing headache and kissed her on the lips.

“Aloha, beautiful!” I said. She tucked her arms under my chin and kissed me back. When she did, the pain in my head subsided. Her gift was growing stronger by the day.

“Dada sing,” she demanded. I hugged her quick and walked into the living room.

“Anything for you. Now, where did I leave my guitar?”

Waiting for me on the couch was my guitar
, but it wasn’t alone. Kai sat upright with it slid in-between his hands and he quietly strummed a chord with one hand.

“Kai…”

“Hey, Bro.”

“What are you doing here?” I asked, but I already knew the answer.

“I’m here to pick up Madi,” he said, politely. “Sam asked me to pick her up.”

“Oh,” I said, defeated. Obviously, Sam didn’t want to see me. Madi slipped from my grasp and her feet gently touched the floor.

Setting my guitar to the side, Kai asked, “So, Sam talked to you this morning, about Seattle?”

“You already know the answer to that,” I cursed.

He stood up slowly. “This isn’t goodbye, Max, you’ll get to see Madison whenever you want,” he dared to say.

I stepped into him and snatched my guitar pick from his fingers.
“Lucky me.”

As my mother joined us in the living room, she quickly grabbed Madi into her arms. “Max, not in front of you-know-who,” she pleaded, nodding toward me.

My hands felt hot with anger, but before I could do anything with it, Madi spoke up.

“Dada sing!” She clapped her hands together excited.

Kai and I exchanged worried glances.

“Maybe next time, Madi…” I began to say.

She clapped her hands together again in protest. “Dada sing. Dada and Kai sing!” Her tiny voice could barely say Dada, but Kai rolled off her lips with ease. I guess technically it was much easier to say than Dada, but it still hurt.

“Not tonight, Madi,” Kai said, softly. Her face fell upset.

“Peez…” she begged. It was possibly the best thing I had ever heard, my daughter talking. I knelt down and placed a hand on her cheek and she lit up again. “Peez, Dada?”

My mother looked at me with big worried eyes. I took a deep breath and found Kai’s nervous face.

“What do you say, old friend, one last concert?” I smiled, giving in. He looked down at Madi and then, back at me and grinned.

“Maybe one song.”

 

We played for the next hour, singing a handful of songs we used to play in our old high school rock band. It brought back a rush of wild and fun memories. I loved our band, KID EGO. I loved our music. But most of all, I loved performing with my best friend. When we finished the last song
, Madi stretched her arms in the air and yawned.

BOOK: In Embers (The Ember Series Book 3)
13.44Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
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