I'll Be Seeing You (14 page)

Taking a deep breath, I can smell her arousal — a scent I will never forget. Pulling her center to my mouth, I glide my tongue into her folds. She gasps as her entire body reacts, and her hands immediately fist my hair for support. Parting her lips with my thumbs, I drag my tongue over her only a few times before I stop myself and when I look up her, she’s lost in sensation.

Standing, I reach behind her to remove her bra and step back to admire her beauty.

"You are so beautiful, baby," I say into her mouth before she throws her arms around my neck, kissing me with the passion I know is inside her.

I don’t have the strength to hold back any longer and frantically unzip my pants when it hits me … hard. I have no condoms.

"Joy? Do you have any condoms?" I ask, praying to God she says yes.

"No, but if it helps, I'm on the shot if that's what you’re worried about. I've never been with anyone, so I’m clean. I can only assume you are as well since you are a smart doctor and all," she says with a smartass grin.

"Yes, you’re right,” I say, my breath near panting with need. There's nothing holding us back now.

After I kick out of my jeans and boxer briefs, I quickly remove my shirt, step into her arms, and hold her warm, soft, naked body against mine. The feel of her hands roaming over my back, feeling every space of skin available to her touch, is exquisite. She then feels her way down my hips to the front of my thighs. A growl escapes me as she takes her time touching me … seeing me.

When she lowers to feel my legs, she has no idea how dangerously close her mouth is to my cock. Her feather light touch works its way up the back of my thighs and up across my ass. I grin when she spends a little extra time there.

Becoming more aroused by the minute, the look of desire on her face makes it more difficult for me to stand there, motionless. Lord, I hope I can endure this process without ejaculating before I’m inside her.

As soon as her gentle hands inspect the front of my hips, she touches my cock, and with a hiss, my head falls back as she examines the length of it. I want to taste her as her tongue darts out to moisten her lips, leaving them slightly parted. I don't know how much more of this I can take, but I know it's something she needs to do. Her hands then feel their way up across my stomach and waist, up to my chest, stopping to feel the muscles there. When she steps up and places her mouth over my nipple and flicks it like I did hers, I've had enough.

"Baby, that was the most difficult thing I've ever done," I say, laying her down across the bed. "It was also one of the most erotic things I've ever experienced, and I plan on reciprocating, but first, I'm going to make love to you."

Beginning with her lips, I taste her skin, ending at her sensitive breasts.  While nibbling on her hardened tips, I pull her leg up toward me exposing the center of her and touch her there. Listening to her softly purr is my undoing.

"Jesus, baby, you’re so wet," I growl. "I need you so much." Looking into her sightless eyes, I wish she could see me.

"Matthew," she whispers. Hearing my name said like that with such want and need is more than I can stand.

"This is going to hurt a bit, I apologize.” She nods her head in acceptance, and I see the fear on her face. "Don't be afraid," I say quietly, kissing her as I lower myself on top of her, spreading her with my thighs.

"This isn’t going to be my best performance because it’s been a while and I’ve wanted you for so long," I say through ragged breaths.

"It's all right, Matthew, I just need to feel you inside me."

Placing myself at her entrance, and can already feel how tight she is. She’s so warm … and wet. Trying to prepare her, I enter her a little then withdraw, and it's nearly my undoing. My forehead drops to hers as I mentally stop myself from coming all over her.

Propping myself up on my forearms, I hold her face in the palms of my hands while I inch inside her warmth little bits at a time. Her legs instinctively raise and press against my sides. I can feel her fear when her arms slip under mine, her hands holding onto my shoulders for support.

"I wish you could see me like I see you. You’re so beautiful," I say low into her ear, pushing in a little more now.

"Thank you for this gift," I say against her lips as I thrust my hips forward and break past her barrier. My heart aches for her and when she gasps, I immediately stop moving. When I feel her hands grasp the skin on my back and her legs drop stiffly to the bed, I know she’s hurting. This pain I’ve caused her is the only regret I have, but know she will feel pleasure soon.

"You're mine, Joy," I whisper, holding steady, so that she can acclimate her body to mine. Once her pained facial expression goes away, I begin to move slowly within her.

"And I am yours." Kissing her swollen lips, I slowly roll my hips against her.

"Are you all right?" I ask when I feel her hips move slightly.

"Yes, it's better now." Her hands still have hold of my shoulders, and her breathing has become rapid and shallow.

"That's it, baby … move with me," I growl into her ear as she begins to move her hips with mine.

"Oh, God, Matthew." I smile at how much I'm enjoying her at this moment. How much she’s giving herself over to me.

"Can you wrap your legs around me?" I ask. "That's it," I say, trying desperately to control my movements. I want to fuck her so badly, but I also don't want to hurt her.

"Are you all right?" I need to know because I need to move.

"Oh, yes,” she sighs. “Please, more, Matthew."

Oh thank God. I move faster now, and inwardly admonish myself because I know I'm not going to last.

"You feel so good," I say through a lusty voice, thrusting deeper and harder now.

"Come on, baby, move with me." She meets me thrust for thrust. "Oh, yeah, that's it."

"I'm not going to last much longer, Joy." I feel her tighten around me. "Christ, you feel so good," I growl uncontrollably.

"I feel it, Matthew. I feel it coming," she says desperately, wrapping her arms around me tighter. I want to get up on my knees, but I'm not leaving her, not her first time. I want her to be able to hold on to me.

"Oh, god, please, more. Faster,” she begs, which is music to my ears.

I couldn’t stop now if I wanted to and thrust into her harder and faster.

"Come with me," I hiss, trying to hold back … feeling her tighten around me.

"Yes, yes, hurry because I can't stop it … I …"

She cries my name and I’m riding that tidal wave right along with her.

Holding her tightly, I wrap my arms around her, and release deep inside her. My entire body shudders over her, believing it will never end.

Breathless, I look down on her face and see glistening tears in her eyes. Rolling off her and onto my side, I bring her with me, holding her close to my body.

"Oh, baby," I whisper against her mouth. My heart breaks for her. The last thing I wanted to do was to make her cry.

"Thank you, Matthew. That was everything I dreamed of and more. You made it something I will remember for the rest of my life," she whimpers. I hold her closer to me and grab the blanket, pulling it over us.

"Please, don't cry," I plead, wiping her tears away. "I love you, you know."

"I think it's from the intensity of everything. That was more powerful than the time in the kitchen." She’s giggling now, and it eases my heart.

"Thank you for letting me be your first," I say, as we lay quietly for a while, contemplating what just happened. Our fingers softly smooth over each other's skin, whispering sweet nothings.

"I love you." She burrows her face into my neck, and I just hold her there, enjoying the feel of her.

"Where are you going this weekend?" she asks, breaking the silence.

"Oh, I have a cabin on Bainbridge Island." I'm not even sure if I still want to go. I planned the trip initially to get away from everything.

"When are you leaving?" she asks, running her fingernail in circles over my nipple, causing me jerk because it tickles.

"Tomorrow, after I see my last patient," I answer. "Joy, baby, that tickles." I grab hold of her hand to get her to stop.

"Oh," she says, moving to get out of bed.

"Where are you going?" I ask, pulling her back into bed with me.

"I need to get cleaned up." She unsuccessfully hides her face from me.

"Come here for a second." I turn her so that she’s facing me, and she still attempts to hide from me. Once I lift her chin, I can see she’s crying.

"What's up, Joy?" I ask, laying her down next to me.

"Nothing. I don't know. I guess my emotions are running a little high right now. Tonight was a big night for me," she explains rather poorly, as she tries to pull away yet again. Wasn't she the one that stressed communication?

"Do you not want me to go?" I ask, stroking her hair out of her eyes.

"Of course I want you to go," she says, barely audible, burying her face into my neck.

"Tell me."

"No."

"No, you don't want me to go?" I ask again, trying to trap her into telling me.

"No, I'm not going to tell you. I want you to do what you want to do and quit trying to mince my words," she says, smacking my chest and moving away from me before I can stop her and heads for the bathroom.

"Hey, baby," I say, when she returns looking sexy in a pair of sleep pants and matching tank. She’s braided her hair back as well. So this is how my girl looks when she goes to bed, I think to myself. I like it.

"Would you stay with me? Here. Tonight?" she asks sweetly. How can I say no to that?

"Of course I will. I need to leave early, though, okay? I have a consultation in the morning."

"All right,” she says, sleepily. "I need to take Conrad out real quick." She gets up and slips into a pair of shoes and a jacket, kissing me as I sit on the side of the bed.

"I'll go down with you, but come here for a second first," I say, watching her walk around the bed toward me.

"I'm not going away this weekend without you, okay?" I see a slow smile come to her lips. "I wouldn't leave you behind. I just wanted to take the drive and check on the cabin, but we can do that together. Would you like that?" I hold her hand in mine, running my thumb over the back of it.

"I would like that very much."

"Why don't we leave Saturday morning and stay the night? What about Conrad?" I ask.

"Do you have a travel crate for him? If you do, we can take my SUV and bring him with us." With that, she throws herself at me, knocking me backward onto the bed.

"You are the best boyfriend a girl could ever have, do you know that?”

I’m her boyfriend!

"Tell me every single detail of every single minute," Laura urges, rushing through the door before I even get the opportunity to say hello to her.

"Hello, Laura. Come in, Laura. Would you like something to drink, Laura?" I say sarcastically, giggling, as she drags me to the couch.

"Hi … thank you … no,” she quickly answers my questions. “Was it wonderful?" she persists, pulling me down next to her on the couch. I sigh deeply and smile.

"It really was." I instantly feel the heat rush to my face. "It was perfect, really." I throw my head on the cushions and dream of it all over again.

"Tell me everything," she demands, excitedly.

"Well, I'm not going to give you all the details, but it was absolutely wonderful. He was so gentle and caring, just like they describe in some of the romance novels that I've read. It was very romantic," I say dreamily, remembering every detail. Even now, my body tingles at the thought of him touching me.

"Oh, I knew he would be," she says. "Did he bend you over the bed, or was it straight missionary?"

"He carried me to my bed and laid me down. Oh my god, Laura, when he came, he reached under me and wrapped his arms around all of me and held on to me for dear life. I could barely breathe. He buried his face in my neck, and I felt him move inside of me as he came. God, I want to do that again." I’m in heaven remembering how wonderful he made me feel.

"What else?” Laura presses, taking hold of my hand.

"Laura!"

"Well, it's not every day my best friend loses her virginity. I want to know every detail." I can feel her jumping in her seat. "Did it hurt?"

"Yes, a little. He thanked me. I thought that was incredibly sweet." Recalling that brief, painful moment, it pales in comparison to how perfect it was after.

"Oh, Joy, that is the sweetest thing I've ever heard. Most guys don't even make sure you’re wet enough, let alone say thanks." We laugh, and her interrogation continues.

"He is so sexy, Laura. His body is so beautiful. And that rubber thing you brought over to me the other day?"

"Yeah?" she says in anticipation.

"He's way bigger than that." We sit back and laugh harder. "Lord, I hope he doesn't find out about that."

"So you worked it all out then? Everything’s good between you two?" she continues, taking my hand again.

"Yes, we talked everything out. He told me about his ex-fiancé, Emma, too. She really is a wicked human being. He explained to me about what he saw that day in the café and we worked it out between us. Anyway, we’re going to Bainbridge Island tomorrow. He has a cabin there, and he wants to check on it, so we’re taking Conrad and going there for the night."

"That sounds great. I'm so happy for you, sweetie. I'm glad you two worked it out. Did you drop the 'L' word?"

"We both did." I lay my head back, so happy that we were able to work everything out and confess to each other how we felt.

"Yeah, Jessie said he thought Matthew was a goner," Laura says as she jumps up to get water from the refrigerator.

"Speaking of Jessie, how is it going with you two?"

"Well, the sex is awesome, of course, but I’m not so sure he’s wanting much more than that. I get the feeling he just wants sex from me."

"Yeah, I'll be honest with you, Laura, that's kind of how Matthew described Jessie's character. He warned me about it, but I wanted to see if he would step up before I told you. If you’ve figured it out, apparently he's not going to change anytime soon. In his defense, Matthew did say he's crazy about you. He just has a strange way of showing it."

I know this probably disappoints her, but I think it's time that she hears it before her heart gets broken.

"I think you’re right. I have strong feelings for him as it is, and if I allow him in more than he is already, I will certainly get hurt. I think I need to end it before it's too late." I hear the hurt in her voice, but believe this is a wise decision. I really wanted it to work out for them.

"I guess that means no Jessie for Thanksgiving then?"

"We can’t not invite him, Joy. That would be cruel to have all of us together and not invite him. It doesn’t say I have to sleep with him, but I can have some fun that day, you know?"

"You’re right. Where are we having it?" I ask.

"I have no idea. Everyone's house is too small. I’ll ask Maddie and see what she says. You'll ask Matthew if he wants to join us, right?" I nod my head in agreement.

While we are talking about the holiday, my phone rings. It's Dr. Jenkins' office. I cringe knowing that Matthew has contacted him for my medical records already.

"Hang on Laura, I need to take this."

"Hello." I answer.

"Hello, Joy, this is Dr. Jenkins."

"Hello, Doctor," I reply, knowing why he’s calling.

"I received a call from Dr. Davis this morning requesting that I forward your medical records to his office. I will do that with your permission, but I’m curious why you would seek medical advice after the extensive work-up we’ve done on your case already?”

"Well, Doctor, as you know, Dr. Davis is very well known in the field, and he has asked to review my files. If he feels there’s nothing to pursue, then that’s the end of it. However, if he finds that there is something of significance, he's asked me for permission to look into it, and I have agreed. If you’re calling for permission to forward my files, then you have it. You can fax me the proper release forms if you need them."

"All right, Joy, I’ll send the files over to his office. I know of Dr. Davis and the work he does. I also know about the new procedure he's attempting to get off the ground. If it works for you, I wish you all the best. Please call me if you need anything else, all right?"

"I will, Doctor, thanks for all your help." I hang up thankful that’s over.

"You’re going to let Matthew look into your case?” I nod. “That's great. God, I hope he finds something for you."

"Yeah. Listen,” I interrupt. “Scott will be here shortly, so I hate to push you out, but I have to get to work. Plus, I need to have a private conversation with him." After my talk with Matthew, I need to discuss his behavior.

"Okay, don't forget to ask Matthew about Thanksgiving, and you have fun this weekend. Call me when you get home, all right?"

"I will." I promise. "Love you, Laura." I shout, waving at her before shutting my apartment door.

As soon as I begin to tidy up our mess, the buzzer sounds from downstairs. That will be Scott.

"Yes?" I answer into the intercom.

"It's Scott,” he sings, drawing out his name. Waiting for his knock at the door, I open it for him, inviting him inside.

"Hey, Scott, come in.” Feeling Conrad stand next to me, I bend over to thank him for protecting me.

"Would you like anything to drink?" I ask feeling the adrenalin begin to flow.

"No, I have a coffee right here. Let's get to work, shall we?" he suggests, as I hear him walk toward my office.

"Scott, I don’t want you to drink coffee in the office anymore. Finish it out here or leave it on the table, but you aren't to have any more food or drink near my equipment," I assert. I’m livid that he lied to me about the mess he leaves behind as it is.

"What's up with that, Joy? I always have my coffee while we work," he says, sounding appalled. "What's going on?"

"Well, for one, every day you have told me you cleaned your up your mess, and last night I found that you left half-emptied coffee cups, food wrappers, and trash around your workstation," I point out. "It took someone else to see the mess you've been leaving behind, and they cleaned up after you. You may not appreciate the equipment I have, Scott, but that’s my livelihood in there. So, like I said, no more food or drink around my equipment." I fold my arms across my chest, waiting for him to challenge me.

"It's that Matthew, isn't it? Did he tell you I had left a mess? Well, I didn't. Did it ever occur to you that he could be lying?"

"No, it never occurred to me," I retort, shocked he would even suggest such a thing. I walk toward my office and come back with the trash can containing all the garbage Matthew took off the workstation. "Does this look like a lie to you, Scott? This is what came off your desk. If you want something, you will have to come out here to eat and drink," I reiterate, setting the can down.

I’m really irritated with him now, insinuating that Matthew is lying when I stood right there while he cleaned up after the man.

"Ah, Joy, don't be mad at me. I'm sorry," he apologizes, walking up to me to give me a hug, and just as Matthew explained to me the other night, he’s actually pressing my breasts into his chest.

Appalled, I push him away from me, walk to the front door and hold it open for him.

"What the fuck, Joy!" he says, stunned. "What is going on?"

"You can do your part of the book at Radiant, and I will submit mine from here. Goodbye, Scott." Motioning for him to leave but he doesn't. Without a word, he grabs hold of my arm and yanks me back to him, causing me to scream.

"Conrad, Attack!" I command. The next thing I know, Conrad is attacking Scott, and he yells to be let go.

"Conrad, release," I’m relieved when he stumbles out into the hallway.

"You are not welcome here again, Scott," I say, before slamming the door in his face.

"Good boy, Conrad. You get a treat for that." Dropping to my knees, I praise him and hug him to me before going to the pantry to get one of his favorite treats: a big, tasty, chew bone.

Just when I give Conrad his reward, my phone rings. I’m sure it's Scott, but I’m not changing my mind. On the second ring, my phone announces that it's Matthew, and I rush to answer it.

"Hello," I say, trying to breathe normally while physically shaking.

"Hey, baby. I wanted to hear your voice," he says, cheerfully. When I don't respond, he notices something is wrong. "What's the matter?"

"Um, do you have time to come over?" I ask. "I won't keep you. I know you have a full schedule this morning." Considering the recent breakdown in our communication, I know he’ll be upset if I don't tell him about this.

"Do I need to be concerned, Joy?" he asks, his tone changing drastically.

"No. I just need to share something with you, and I don't want to do it over the phone. I can tell you the next time I see you, if you can't leave the office."

"I'll be there in ten minutes." He doesn't even say goodbye. Good lord, how do I explain this to him without him exploding? In the meantime, I decide to call Mr. White to tell him why Scott will be doing his portion of the story at Radiant rather than at my home.

"Hello, Mr. White, this is Joy," I say, when he answers.

"Hey, Joy. How's the book coming along?"

"It's going good, but we've had a little hiccup, and I thought I better tell you about it before it gets too distorted." I explain what happened with Scott and why I won't allow him in my home any longer, and that's when Matthew buzzes from downstairs. I release the security door for him and open my front door.

"Did he hurt you?"

"No, he didn't hurt me other than grabbing for my arm. It's the first time I've ever had to issue a command for Conrad to attack though. That was frightening in itself. Once Conrad latched onto his arm, Scott let go of me," I say in hush tones, so Matthew won't hear before I get the opportunity to tell him.

"Can I call you back, Mr. White? I have someone here that I need to speak with," I ask. Not waiting for an answer, I hang up before realizing it’s too late. I sense him behind me, listening.

"Joy?" His voice angry.

"Matthew, please stay calm. I will not have you flying off the handle when I have already taken care of the problem. I thought I should tell you sooner rather than later." I walk us to the couch and explain to him what transpired.

"Y … you let him hug you?" he asks, sounding hurt. I don’t blame him in light of the conversation we had just last night.

"Yes. I wanted to test your theory before I ended my professional relationship with him. He did exactly what you said, and when he did, I told him to leave and that he would be doing his portion of the book from the Radiant offices. That's when he grabbed me, and Conrad saved the day, didn't you, boy?" I ask, his happy tail thumping the side of the couch. "He was by my side the entire time Scott was here."

"I'll —" Matthew jumps up out of his seat.

"You'll do nothing, Matthew," I interrupt, grabbing his arm. "I won't have you fighting with him. He won't be back here, and I won't work with him again after this project. I've informed my superior at Radiant, and I'm going to let them handle the administrative end of Scott's inappropriate behavior. Please don't get yourself in trouble, especially while you are trying to get your procedure off the ground."

"Let me see your arm," he says, softly, taking my arm and lifting my sleeve.

"Is there a mark?" I ask.

"It's a little red, but there won't be any bruising." In a sweet gesture, he lifts my arm to his lips and kisses the area where Scott grabbed me.