If Ever I Fall: Book 3 of The Six Series (3 page)

I willed my legs to hold me up for a few more hours. “I have to go see Mum. If she knows I’m home and I don’t go to see her, she’ll be upset.”

“Sit ye down. Yer not going anywhere until you rest a bit. And a little food would do ye well, too,” she scoffed, eying me as if she dared me to refuse.

My backside hit the couch with a bounce. “As ye say, Auntie.”

Her face bloomed into a smile that lit up the room like a candle in the window, glowing brightly to show the way home.

My throat tightened and tears welled in my eyes at the thought. I was way more tired than I realized, thinking poetic sentiments such as that. And worse than that, they made me an emotional mess.

Blinking away the tears before Aunt Brenda saw them, I tipped my head back to rest against the couch and fought the dark abyss of sleep that tried sucking me into its welcoming arms.

A subtle shift in the room told me Aunt Brenda had left. I didn’t need to see it. I could feel it. Kind of like when the sun hid behind the clouds briefly as they passed by. She’d be back, and would be loaded down with a tray of food. I just had to hold out for a few more minutes.

I WOKE TO THE DIM lighting from the lamp on Aunt Brenda’s desk. I’d fallen asleep sitting up and woke stretched from end to end on the small couch. Covered with a thin blanket draped over me, I closed my eyes and pulled it tight underneath my chin to keep the heat in for just a little while longer.

Even the blanket smelled like home. The scent of sandalwood and lavender tickled my nose, soothing me. It was the same scent that Aunt Brenda’s house smelled like ever since I was a child.

Snuggling further into the couch, I recalled many a day I’d taken a nap in the same spot. Only then, I actually fit on the couch lengthwise.

After the death of my father, Mum came to work for Aunt Brenda and I’d hang out doing homework or reading a book, cuddled up in the very blanket that rested over me, offering me its security.

Across the small room, a pen scratched against paper for a brief second as my aunt worked at her desk. The faint smell of honey and cinnamon tea floated along the air, and I inhaled deeply as my stomach rumbled.

“Awake then, are ya?” Aunt Brenda called out softly.

There was no use trying to deny it, not with the ruckus coming from under the blanket. My reprieve was over.

Peeling back the blanket, I pushed myself upright, rubbing my eyes with a yawn that practically split my face.

Aunt Brenda left without a word, coming back moments later with a cup of steaming tea. “Your food’s warming. Aiden will be bringing it in when it’s ready.”

She handed the teacup over to me and I wrapped my hands around it, absorbing the heat. “Is Aiden the guy who was up front when I came in?”

Her eyebrow quirked at my question. “He is. A nice American boy from…” She stopped in thought.

“Alabama,” a syrupy voice said from the hallway. It was a good thing I was sitting, or my knees would have melted, and I would have ended up with a hot cup of tea down the front of me.

As it was, the death grip I had on the cup threatened to crack the ceramic.

My aunt snapped her fingers, making me jump. Hot tea slopped over the side of the cup, scalding my hand. I bit back a hiss and shifted my injured hand to my mouth.

“I have your food right here. No need to be chewing off your fingers. Ya might need them again,” he said, standing in front of me and holding out a tray.

Aunt Brenda chuckled as she took it, settling the legs over my lap. “Aiden’s just started working here about two weeks past. God love him. And a right good handyman he’s turned out to be too. Remember that old chair I wanted to have fixed but the repairman wanted so much to do it?” She chugged along, not waiting for my reply. “Well, Aiden here had it fixed in no time. It’s back out front like before, and even old Tom can come in and sit without a squeak!”

Old Tom was pushing seventy and was just as wide as he was tall. “Aunt Brenda, you shouldn’t say such things.” I couldn’t keep the humor from my voice.

She flicked her hand at me in dismissal and turned to Aiden. “I shouldn’t say such things, she says. Why, just the other day that old bampot called me a…”

Aiden’s lips curled into a brilliant smile. “And as I recall, you set him straight.”

Aunt Brenda hooted a laugh, waving the air in front of her. “Right as rain about that, lad!”

Aiden stepped back as if to leave, but Aunt Brenda caught him by the shirt sleeve. “And where do you think yer going? Ye cannot rush off yet, ye haven’t been properly introduced!”

Aiden ducked his head, “I’ll come back in a little bit after she’s had a chance to eat. You can properly introduce us then.”

He turned on his heel, leaving Aunt Brenda and I staring at the spot he’d been standing.

“Such a good lad, that one. I’ll say it, Airen, there’s no better catch in the whole of Scotland than that one.” Her eyes twinkled as she sighed.

I knew that look. “Don’t even think about playing matchmaker. He’s an American for Chri-”

“Haud yer wheesht, young lady. Besides, what’s wrong with Americans?” The crossed look on her face smoothed out, turning inquisitive.

“They go back to America? They always go back home. I mean, look at me. Prime example,” I said, picking up the spoon from the tray to keep my face from giving away the fact that Aiden did set my pulse aflutter.

As I poked through the layer of gooey cheese, the smell of onion rose up around us. My stomach growled loudly, ready for me to share the bounty. Thankfully, it had remained quiet when in the presence of Aiden.

As I ate, I wondered just what Aunt Brenda thought she’d accomplish by ‘properly introducing’ us. It wasn’t as if I were looking for any sort of relationship. My last one ended two years prior with a boy who’d thought he’d pin me down, making me into a tidy little housewife with a bairn on each hip and one on the way. I shivered at the thought—not of kids. They’d be nice to have, one day, but the thought of settling down before I discovered myself made me antsy. I could only hope Aunt Brenda wouldn’t try to push the issue.

Aiden was handsome, there was no doubt about that, but he was also a drifter like me. I wasn’t sure how I could tell that just by meeting him, but it was there in the way he held himself, or maybe it was some flicker I’d seen in his eyes. Regardless of how, I knew it. Best to keep that frame of thought when it came to him, especially since we’d be spending a lot of time working together.

“Och! To be sure, most do. Unless of course, ye give them a good enough reason to stay,” she said, rounding her desk and sitting down.

It was her stab at having the last word. I knew better than to say more. It would only get her going again, so I left it alone and focused on eating every last drop of soup until the spoon scratched against the empty bottom of the stoneware bowl.

“Would you like more?” Aunt Brenda asked, pushing herself back from her desk.

I waved for her to stay. “No, I’m good. Thank you.”

She made a noise of protest, talking to herself. “Bones sticking out clear as day, and she’s good, she says.”

Lifting the tray up, I made to stand. When she saw what I was doing, she called out to Aiden.

Heat flushed my skin. “Aunt Brenda, I’m more than capable of taking the tray out myself.”

“Yer bum’s oot the windae, aye?” She quirked an eyebrow at me as if challenging me to say more.

My plea did no good as Aiden, hearing his name, appeared in the doorway almost immediately. His eyes landed on me. Seeing me holding the tray, he came over, sliding one hand under the center to take it.

I let it go and took a step back, suddenly feeling faint. I’d gotten to my feet too quickly, my brain catching up with my movements and deciding that wasn’t allowed. Black dots danced in front of my eyes. I swayed on my feet, hoping I’d make it to the couch before I passed out. But the world quickly righted itself when a warm heat pressed against my chest, holding me upright.

“Airen!” Aunt Brenda sounded upset, but I couldn’t figure out why.

It took a minute to connect it all together. Why I felt so warm, so solid. It was because Aiden held me against his chest with one arm, keeping me flush against him so I wouldn’t topple over.

“Can you take the tray, Brenda? I’ve got her.” His voice rumbled somewhere next to my ear, sending a rolling vibration through my entire body.

Before I could try to push back and stand on my own, Aiden scooped me up and cradled me against his chest. I pushed weakly against him, hoping he’d set me down.

“Be still. I’ve got you,” he said with a warning squeeze.

My head lolled against his shoulder as I grumbled under my breath.

Aiden, paying no attention to me, spoke to Aunt Brenda. “I’ve locked everything up for the night. Why don’t you wrap it up here and take her home?”

“Oh, aye. Be a dear, Aiden, and put her in the car while I get my stuff together,” Aunt Brenda said, handing Aiden her keys. “I’ll just be a minute.”

She placed the car keys in his hands, and then we were moving out the back of the coffee shop before I could make any sort of protest.

When he rounded the car to the driver’s side and realized what he’d done, he cursed under his breath, saying, “Everything is backwards,” and then walked back around.

My aunt drove a 1970’s BMW 2002 Ti Coupe, which proved difficult to unlock the door while holding me and bending down to see the lock. After two failed attempts, Aiden apologized, setting me on my feet and sliding the key in the lock. When he opened the door, I slipped into the seat before he could help me.

I thought he’d walk away at that point, but instead, he knelt down, sticking his hand out to shake mine. I squirmed in my seat, but I slipped my hand in his.

“I’m Aiden, and you’re Airen. Now we can say we’ve been introduced.” He shook my hand firmly and released it just as quickly. There was no lingering touch to make me feel uncomfortable, and for that, I was thankful.

“Oh good, you’re all settled then,” Aunt Brenda trilled, rounding the car and sliding into the backseat. “Aiden, be a good lad and see us home. Lord knows I’d never get her in the house myself should she fall out again.”

Something close to a sigh slipped out of him just as he closed my door with a soft thud. A warning growl at my meddling aunt was all I could manage before Aiden stuffed himself into the front seat.

Looking out over the steering wheel, Aiden’s jaw twitched as he fired up the car. And all I could think of was what he’d said earlier about everything being backwards. The ride to Aunt Brenda’s would be an interesting one, and it would serve her right for thinking herself to be some sort of matchmaker.

I
CAN DO IT. I
know how to drive. I just need to remember to stay on the right… No, the left. I need to stay on the left side of the road
. Fumbling for the headlight switch, I sent a silent prayer up and put the car in gear.

The rain had at least stopped, leaving me with one less thing to deal with. The two women in the car were a whole other story. Brenda’s car might have been big enough for her, but it damn sure didn’t feel big enough for all of us.

Behind me, Brenda’s hand clamped the seat, and beside me, Airen sucked in gasps every now and then when I drifted over to the right side of the road. I couldn’t help it; it was ingrained in me since before I could drive. The right side of the road was the right side of the road. My brain knew it, even if it had to constantly remind itself to go against everything it had been trained to do. Several times, I had to pull my foot away from the gas pedal, slowing down to accommodate not only the narrow roads, but the squeaks of protest if I drove too fast.

The hair-raising drive to Brenda’s was at least a short one. Four miles from The Grounded Bean, her house was set back off the road, hidden by a wall of trees. The only indication of a residence being there was the allotted break in the concrete half wall, and Brenda’s direction to slow down and turn right. When I pulled to a stop, Brenda chuckled, slapping the seat. “Now, that wasn’t so bad, was it?”

I flicked a glance at her in the rearview mirror. She caught my look and gave me a clipped nod, as if I’d passed some sort of test.

Climbing out of the driver’s seat, I pushed it forward to assist Brenda from the back, but she shooed me off. “I can manage. Go and help Airen, if you would, laddie.”

Hearing that, Airen popped her door open, got out of the car, and closed the door with a hard push. “I can manage, Aunt Brenda. I’m not a complete invalid.”

Brenda, muttering, accepted my hand as she put one foot out the door, seeking purchase on the ground as I helped pull her the rest of the way out.

With both feet firmly planted, Brenda started towards the house, but stopped when she got to the first step on the porch. “Oh, Aiden, would you mind grabbing Airen’s bag from the trunk?”

She left me then, standing beside the car, door still open, seat still pulled forward, keys still in my hand. With a sigh, I pushed the seat back, shut the door, and rounded the car.

Popping the trunk, I pulled the bag out and slammed the lid closed with a little too much force. Knowing what sort of game Brenda was playing made my nerves twitch. I didn’t have time to even warm up to the notion of being set up. I had things to do. Dating wasn’t in the cards for me. Falling in love? I had too many other important things going on in my life to throw something like that into the mix. I snorted at the notion, shaking my head.

“Are you all right, Aiden?” Airen called from the porch.

Pulling her bag over my shoulder, I turned to answer and faltered. The porch light had been turned on, bathing everything, including her, in a soft yellow. It was like watching the sun rise over a field of wildflowers in Alabama. A golden light that bathed everything it touched with a warm glow. It was beautiful. She was beautiful.

I was in no hurry to rush to the porch, so long as I could watch the light play over the outline of her hair. Her skin, a creamy white illuminated like a harvest moon, glowed against the darkness that pressed forward against the light behind her.

My hand found my chest and rubbed furiously at it, willing my heart to slow. In reality, it wanted to jump out of my chest, shouting,
“Home! We’ve found home!”

I turned away abruptly, forcing myself to look back at the tree-enshrouded front yard. The darkness was there, ready to take me back into its embrace. All I had to do was drop the bag I held and run. Haul ass back to the sanctuary of the church basement and away from the scene behind me.

My knuckles strained as I fisted my hands, willing myself to stop standing in the yard like an idiot and move.

Airen’s voice hissed beside me. “What is it? Is someone out there?”

Her footsteps had been soundless, or I’d been so caught up in my thoughts that I hadn’t heard her. I looked back at her, but with the light behind her, I couldn’t see her face clearly, which was probably for the best. The darkness had taken away not only her ethereal glow, but my wayward thoughts as well.

Shifting, I willed my hands to unclench as I turned around and asked, “Were you expecting someone?”

She turned with me, and I caught the flinch my voice had inflicted on her. My question had come out harsher than I intended it to.

Pulling her arms up tightly against her chest, she tucked her hands neatly under them as she shifted in unease. She darted a look over her shoulder at the black outline of trees, and then back to me. “No, I just… you were staring so intently that I thought…”

The sound of clattering pans came from the open front door, the shrill sound of a telephone ringing its background noise. Seconds later, Brenda poked her head out, calling to Airen, “Your mum is on the phone.”

Airen sucked in a sharp breath. “Damn, I forgot to call her.”

She left me standing there as she raced up the steps and into the house.

Tipping my head back to look up at the sky, I blew out a long breath. Righting my shoulders, I wondered if Grant could even fathom what he’d gotten me into by asking me to keep an ear out for information.

What better way than getting to know Brenda and her niece? What better way indeed?

The stars were all but gone with the low clouds rolling in. It would rain at some point
. Probably when I’m walking back to the church,
I thought, pulling my gaze away.

I’d hesitated as long as I could. If I didn’t make my way inside, Brenda would come out, badgering me with questions about why I was standing in the yard. She’d probably think it was because of Airen. And wasn’t it?

Up until Airen had come home, everything had been fine. More than fine. I’d been comfortable in my deceptive position of intelligence gathering. Anything I came up with more than likely wouldn’t link to Brenda, or rather it would, but not in a way that Brenda would ever know about.

Having Airen back, Brenda was intent on pushing her my way. And what then? I didn’t need an obstacle—I needed answers. I needed something to report back to Grant on. Airen would be one more person to get around in order to do what I’d set out to do the day I was hired on at The Grounded Bean.

Once I had that information, what then? Moving on with a ‘thank you for your kindness’ would have been easy with only Brenda. Her niece would be a different story, especially if Brenda got to her and set her on me.

The porch steps creaked under my feet almost like a warning to tread lightly when it came to the two women inside.

Pulling the front door closed behind me, I made my way to the living room and set Airen’s bag down on the cabbage rose-printed sofa. Across the room was a wall filled with pictures that immediately caught my attention. My eyes skimmed over each picture from pigtails to hair curlers. Brenda had captured and framed Airen’s life, hanging it up on her wall.

“Awful, isn’t it?” Airen asked from across the room. Before I knew it, she stood beside me.

I hadn’t missed it earlier then; the tread of her feet was as silent as my own. Was it something people were born with? I had to be taught to walk that way—most did.

Of course, in my line of work, a heavy footfall would give you away and get you shot. It made me wonder what her reason was.

“It’s like a shrine of me. I’ve asked her to take them down, but you know Aunt Brenda. There’s no changing her if she doesn’t want to be changed,” she said, passing by me to grab her bag.

I forced myself to pull my eyes away from a picture of Airen in a two-piece bathing suit. I had to, because for whatever reason, and I couldn’t explain it, a tinge of jealousy shot through me at the boy in the picture with his arm around her, his hand gripped firmly on her hip.

Airen must have realized which picture I was staring at. She moved swiftly across the room, plucking it from the wall and clasping it between both hands. I willed her to drop it and step on it for good measure, particularly because of the smug-faced boy staring out at me with his cocky smile and arrogant stance. He almost reminded me of Jared. Almost. If the hair color was different, I could almost pretend it was him, but then again, if it were him with his hand on Airen’s hip, I’d probably punch him in the gut.

That thought made me feel better. I pictured the stranger in the picture doubled over while he gasped for air, his hands no longer touching Airen, the girl who by far outclassed him on any given day
. I can see it in your face, buddy. You thought you had her. Didn’t you? And where are you now? That’s right, not here.

“…my friend, Adam,” Airen said, trailing her finger along the face of the boy in the picture. “We lost him three years ago.”

“Lost?” A wave of shame rolled through me. I was mentally picking on a dead boy. That was an all-new low for me.

“He went out fishing with his dad. A storm blew in before they could get home. The boat capsized. They were never found.” A single tear rolled down her cheek. Brushing it away, she walked back over to the wall and hung the picture back up. “He was probably one of the best friends I ever had. We were all but inseparable for years until that happened. I miss him. Terribly. I’d give anything to have him back.”

I knew what she meant. A bout of homesickness bowled over me, threatening to capsize me like the boat that took her best friend away. Not everyone understood friendships like that. How complete they made you feel or that there was even such a thing. Those were the jaded few. The ones burned by bad friendships or just bad people in general.

I had no idea what to say to that.
I’m sorry?
That wasn’t good enough, and nobody really wanted an apology for death. I knew I wouldn’t. Besides, no amount of apologies could stack against the grief. It never brought back those you loved and lost. Instead, I moved closer to the wall, letting my eyes roam over the rest of the pictures.

I’d been so caught up in staring at her in her bikini and the boy beside her that I’d missed the other pictures of them together. The one that drew me next was of the two of them. Adam’s arm was slung over her shoulder, both heads tipped back in laughter. You could see it there—the friendship.

How many times had I seen my friends do that exact same thing with Riley? Except for Ace. Thinking back on it, I couldn’t remember a time once we got into high school where he’d casually draped his arm over her shoulder. Maybe he was afraid she’d be able to tell the difference.

We’d been close, the six of us, well, seven including Riley, for a good part of our life. Losing one would have destroyed us all. But would it have, really?

I looked over at Airen as she leaned in to look at another picture. She gasped, snatching the picture from the wall. “Aunt Brenda, I can’t believe you put that one on the wall!”

Brenda, hearing her name, bustled into the room, dish towel clutched in her hand. “What’s amiss?”

Airen made a growling noise at the back of her throat, and I couldn’t help but wonder if it was a Scottish thing, always making noises when the words either failed them, or they didn’t have anything nice to say. I’d heard it a lot between the two of them—some sort of personal conversation done in a manner of odd noises or huffs.

“Ye left
this
up for all to see?” Airen’s voice pitched to the level of screeching.

Brenda tossed the dish towel over her shoulder and plucked the picture from Airen’s hands, smacking them away as she tried to get it back. “Why, you were a wee bairn then. It’d be quite different had ye been an older lass, but look at your…”

“No! No, we are not looking at my… harumph,” she fired back.

Snatching the picture from her aunt’s hands, she bolted out of the room, but not before I caught a glimpse of Airen in the bathtub, in her birthday suit.

I covered my mouth with my hand to keep the laugh tickling my throat at bay.

Brenda let out a belting laugh, slapping her hand against her leg. “She acts like ye never saw a naked bairn before.” Her laugh carried through to warble her words. Tickled. She was downright tickled with herself.