I Want To Be Yours (18 page)

His lips latched on to one hardened nipple and then the other, moving back and forth between them, driving her insane with need. She whimpered helplessly. He slid a finger against her tight, drenched slit. Liquid fire clamored through her body. She mindlessly writhed against him, trying to get closer, trying to take him deeper in her. He released her breasts to reclaim her lips in a relentless, sensual kiss. A second finger entered her heat. He swallowed her cries as he moved his fingers in slow, insistent thrusts in and out of her. He removed his fingers and placed his engorged shaft at her entrance, rubbing its tip against her.

Mari curled her legs around his back, silently begging him to take her. She refused to verbalize her plea.

“Do you want me, baby?” He seemed to be taunting her.

She was pissed but was too far gone with sexual frustration to call a halt. He resisted every attempt she made to impale herself on his cock.

“Do you,
cara mia
? Say it. Say, ‘I want you, Nico.’”

She stubbornly held her lips firmly closed.

He suddenly sank into her with a powerful thrust.

She moaned long and loud.

He pulled out of her. “Tell me you want this, you want me.” He tenderly kissed along her cheek, her neck, her breast, and pulled a pebbled bud into his mouth. “Should I stop?” His husky voice acted as an additional stimulus, making excruciating need claw through her.

“No!” she cried, locking her legs more fiercely around him. “Please, Nico, I want you. I need you!” she begged with helpless tears clogging her voice.

Smiling with triumph at her response, he rewarded her with sensual, hard, balls-deep thrusts, and claimed her mouth with long, drugging kisses. She arched her body, grinding her hips against him, clasping him to her, caressing his hair, his back, and his tight ass.

Nico grunted with approval. He suddenly increased his strokes, feverishly slamming into her until they both convulsed in fulfillment.

Moments later, he gently petted, licked, kissed, and caressed her between her thighs all over again. Her cries filled the room as he pulled her engorged clit between his teeth, tenderly nibbling her. Every time she came close to climaxing he drew back, soothed her, and then started the seduction all over again. He kept at her until she grew hoarse. She was so primed for his possession, it took only one hard thrust, and she exploded around him.

Latching his lips around her sensitive nipple, he slowly rocked into her. With each delicious roll of his hips, and each tug on the tips of her breasts, he further inflamed her desire. When she shattered and tightened like a fist around him, he quickened his strokes until his seed flooded into her.

A few minutes later, Nico disengaged from her and climbed from the bed. He zipped his pants, which had only been lowered, straightened his shirt, and looked at her perched inelegantly on the bed. She was still clothed, with her dress hiked up to her waist, and her breasts freed from the deep vee of the neck line.

“Don’t go near Andrews again.”

Mari was too exhausted and ashamed to adjust her clothes or posture as he silently left the room.

She was so angry she could spit, loathing him so much at that moment. Why would he not listen to her? She felt wounded, betrayed. Nico, her employer, had praised her brilliance and celebrated her achievements at work. At one time, she had at least had his professional respect, but now she didn’t have even that.

He doesn’t love or respect me!

A wife would be more than just his lover and mother of his child. She wailed silently, feeling hollow inside.

Stumbling to her feet, Mari slowly made her way to the
en suite
bathroom. She stood staring at her reflection despondently, trying to come to grips with the empty reality of her marriage. She felt desperate, wounded. Those thoughts repeated in her head like a broken record.

After stripping, she turned away from her nakedness, feeling ashamed and unworthy. She entered the shower, letting icy cold water cascade over her. Desolation overwhelmed her. Her body bowed and her knees buckled as she wept. She slid to the floor of the shower stall in a pitiful heap.
Nico feels nothing for me. I’m nothing to him
. Her tears flowed down her cheek. She stayed in that position until she could cry no more. She slowly got up, despairingly soaped herself clean, and then climbed out.

She curled up in their bed in a fetal position and waited for sleep to claim her.

It was at the fringes of sleep that Mari got angry at herself. She wanted to remember this moment, this hurt. She needed to remember to strengthen her resolve to take control of her life. She was not this broken, pitiful woman who would let any man control her. That bastard Nico could go to hell, as far as she was concerned. She’d done exactly as she promised herself she wouldn’t do. Nico didn’t control how she lived her life, she did. If she wanted a job so badly, tomorrow she would go and find one. She still had a few good contacts, contacts that Nico could not influence or intimidate. Damn, she was a grown-ass woman who’d run her life successfully for years without a man. She’d done it before, and she would do it again.

Nico came into bedroom a few minutes later. Mari settled her breathing into a slow rhythm, pretending to be asleep. She need not have bothered. Nico slid into bed after his shower and promptly fell asleep.

It was the first time since their wedding night that Nico hadn’t reached for her and held her through the night. Despite the fact she would have rebuffed him if he had tried, Mari was still hurt he hadn’t even bothered. Tears leaked out the sides of her eyes, wetting the pillow. So much for being a strong black woman, she thought sadly.

I’ll be strong tomorrow
. She cried silently until she fell into an exhausted sleep.

Chapter Thirteen

When Mari woke
the next morning, Nico had already left for work. She quickly got up, completed her exercises for the day, and spent the morning with Alex. Her equilibrium immediately restored by the unconditional love of her child, she approached the day with renewed optimism. If she wanted Alex to grow up respecting her and to learn how to demand respect for herself, Mari had to carve out a more meaningful life. The role of a mother and wife was honorable, but it wasn’t all she was or all she had to offer.

By midday she had driven to central London, ready for her one-thirty appointment, with her documents tucked safely in her bag. Now all she had to do was to get rid of her surveillance team. Nico had insisted that she had adequate protection for both herself and his daughter.

Mari knew better. Nico wanted to ensure his second wife didn’t cheat on him like the last one had. Mari usually didn’t mind, and often forgot that they were there, but today she didn’t want Nico to know what she was about until she got the job. Then she didn’t care what he thought.

She walked into her favorite department store, selected a few items, paid for them, and then went into the dressing room to put them on.

Nico was in the middle of a board meeting when Gio interrupted suddenly and asked to speak to him. His blood immediately ran cold. Was it his wife, his daughter, who was hurt? Gio would never disrupt an important meeting unless something grave had occurred.

With halting, gentle words, Gio told his boss that his wife might have been trapped in a fire at a department store in Trafalgar Square. The security team had been waiting for her to exit the fitting rooms when an explosion had erupted in the building. It was a chaotic scene as everyone tried to escape in a panicked frenzy. Their search for Mari in the women’s fitting area had initially been hampered by the terrified stampede, and then by the swiftly escalating fire. The team had been forced to leave by the building’s security. The explosion devastated the main storage rooms and started a fire in the entire shopping center. It very quickly raged out of control as highly inflammable garments ignited, and fueled it further. The popular stores had held hundreds of people; however, the casualties were apparently limited to those who had been trapped in the dressing rooms of the initial department store. Emergency vehicles arrived and took away the severely injured, with many being treated right there on the streets. Unfortunately, no one knew how many were still inside. They didn’t expect survivors.

The security team had frantically searched the crowd for a glimpse of Mrs. Darian, hoping she had gotten out in the mad rush. They found a clerk, who, after looking at the photo they presented, only confirmed that she had seen the woman enter the dressing room. She wasn’t sure she had gotten out in time. They tried again to re-enter the building; however, the authorities were letting no one through.

The security lead had then called Gio with the grim report.

Nico looked at him blankly for a moment. Blessed numbness invaded his entire body. On autopilot, he got up and instructed Gio to take him to the site. Gio reluctantly drove him to the gutted building.

Emergency vehicles and personnel were still on scene, trying to secure the area and preparing for the recovery of the dead. There were numerous whispers of the explosion being a terrorist attack. The international news media was out in full force.

They explained to Nico, and many of the other grieving family members, that since most of the dead were buried under the rubble of the building, it would take a while for them to ascertain the extent of the damage and definitively say how many victims there were, and to accurately identify them.

Nico showed no outward reaction to the news. He walked around and questioned the store worker that his men had spoken with. She told him the same thing she had told them. Nico looked around at the sea of people and news reporters. It all seemed surreal. His men had been able to move both their car and Mari’s before the police had secured the scene.

He’d left Mari that morning sleeping peacefully in bed. Maybe not so peacefully. He’d heard her crying the night before. He couldn’t help but feel her silent sobs. Refusing to give into her, he’d chosen to ignore the tears.
My wife will
not
work
.

He stood in one spot lost, motionless, his eyes taking in everything going on around him. Nothing touched him or penetrated his consciousness until he caught sight of Mari’s silver-grey Mercedes, parked next to his car.

Then it became real
.

He started trembling uncontrollably.

Gio, who was watching from a discreet distance away, quickly approached his boss and helped him into the car, cognizant that at any moment reporters could realize who he was and see the obvious distress in his eyes.

Nico couldn’t control the shudders wracking his body or the flow of tears scorching his cheeks. He loved her so much. Why had he never told her so? Why did he not do more to ensure her happiness? Why hadn’t he told his pregnant wife that he loved her? Did she even realize that she was pregnant? Nico felt such deep sorrow for never knowing his unborn child, a child conceived in their love. Anguish completely overwhelmed him, and fresh tears drenched his face. He was completely undone.

A kaleidoscope of images flashed in his mind: Mari giggling as he did his push-ups with her lying beneath him, Mari laughing out loud at corny jokes he and Gio were recounting, Mari writhing in ecstasy in his arms, Mari’s defiance in the face of his stubbornness. This brought a fresh jolt of pain to his heart. His body bent as he buried his face into his knees in anguish.

Mari and Audrey sat in the restaurant giggling over the antics of Audrey’s boys, with Audrey warning that Mari would soon experience the joys of siblings playing vicious pranks on each other.

“I look forward to it.” Mari smiled at the thought of having another baby. Knowing Nico’s difficulty with fertility, she was in awe of conceiving again so soon. She caressed her stomach in sheer joy, feeling healthy and strong. This day couldn’t get any better.

She had gotten the job working for Richard. He’d suddenly taken over the reins of his family’s shipping business after his older brother had brought the company to the brink of bankruptcy. Richard needed all the help he could get and Mari was ecstatic to help him. He had taken a flight to Greece immediately after their meeting. She was scheduled to start and head the London office on Monday.

She knew it was time she told Nico about expecting their second child… how would he feel about this?

He would be forbidding for the first news, but definitely happy about the second. He had bitterly regretted not being there for Alex’s birth.

“Are you pregnant again?” Audrey asked, obviously noting that faraway look on Mari’s face as she lovingly rubbed her stomach.

“Yes, but I haven’t told Nico yet. Do you think he noticed? I’m at least two month. I haven’t seen my menses since meeting Nico again. ” She looked at Audrey inquiringly.

“How often do you make love?”

Mari gave her a meaningful stare.

“He noticed!” she and Audrey said in unison. They laughed and were continuing to enjoy their outing when Audrey’s phone went off.

It was Audrey’s husband making sure that she was okay. He explained about the explosion and fire in her favorite department store, frightened she might have visited it. Audrey confirmed she had been there earlier in the day but had left long before the fire.

As Audrey rang off, she explained to Mari what her husband had said. They both looked at each other in horror as they realized what a close call they had escaped.

“Oh my God, Audrey! Nico is going to kill me! I tricked my security detail into thinking that I was still in that store. They must be frantic by now. What if they think I was in there?” Mari was horrified to think of what was being told to Nico. He might not love her, but she was sure he would at least care if she died.

“It will take me hours to get home at this time of day. I need to call him!” She fished in her bag unsuccessfully for her phone, only to remember she’d left the phone in her car. Her phone had a tracking device in it and she hadn’t wanted Nico to know her whereabouts today. Mari scrambled to her feet, gathering her handbag and frantically fishing out sufficient money to pay for their meal.

“You can use my phone to call him.”

Mari tried calling Nico’s mobile from Audrey’s phone, but it went straight to voicemail. She became even more panicked.

“You have to go home now. Come, let’s go.” Audrey got up quickly from her chair. “Everyone must be beside themselves!”

“You’re probably right. I better do this on my own, though. Nico will be furious once I explain what had happened today and I don’t want you caught up in that. You should go home and hug your traumatized husband and I will go and try to appease mine.” Mari anxiously called a car service to take her and Audrey to their respective homes.

The car was about half a mile from her front gate, when Mari noted the frenzy of reporters and television crew outside. She quickly instructed the driver to turn around and take her back to an obscure gate on the other side of the property. Thank God Gio always insisted that she and Nico have the key for the back gate in case of an emergency, and tonight was an emergency. The presence of this much press could only mean the worst: Nico and everyone else thought she was dead!

As she disarmed the alarm on the gate and opened it with her key, she shook her head in horror to think of how she could possibly explain what she’d done. It was not going to be pretty. She edged along the perimeter of the lawn, trying desperately to avoid the security cameras. The sensors would only be turned on much later that night, so she didn’t have to worry about them. There was a distinct chill in the air and she wasn’t dressed for the two-mile trek to the house.

By the time she arrived to the pool area, she was shivering in earnest. Just then, a bulky figure wrestled her to the ground. She screamed in fright and instantly realized that it was Gio.

“Gio? Get off of me!” she demanded.

“Madam?”

“Gio, you are heavy! I can’t breathe!” Mari tried desperately to get from under him, but Gio was immobile with shock.

“What the… ?”

Mari quickly interrupted him as he sprung to his feet. “No, I know this must look bad but there is a reasonable explanation for everything. This was an honest misunderstanding.” Her statement was met with a look of horror and disapproval by a stunned Gio.

“That it may well be, Madam, but the house is in an uproar. Nico is in a bad way. We were frightened for him.” Gio’s frown conveyed just how worried he’d been for his employer.

“What are all these reporters and news people doing here? I tried coming through the front but couldn’t get past,” Mari asked as Gio helped her up from the ground.

“It is all over the news that you perished in the fire,” he stated grimly.

“What? Already? I have only been out for a few hours!”

“Madam, you left the house at 10:30 a.m. and it is now a little after 6:00 p.m. Long enough for every hospital in London to be contacted, long enough for your presumed death to have been announced, and long enough for your in-laws to arrive.”

His disapproval couldn’t have been more damning. Mari stiffened with worry. She was deeply saddened about the chaos she had inadvertently created. She just wanted to get inside, explain, and alleviate everyone’s grief.

She started walking, then running toward the house, not waiting for Gio to follow. She entered through the kitchen door. A stunned Martha looked at her as if she was seeing a ghost.

“I know, I know,” she stated, running through the kitchen. “Gio will explain it all to you.” She then continued through and came to a halt in the drawing room, as a sea of faces turned astonished gazes upon her.

“I can explain, but I need to talk to Nico first. Where is he?” Mari hurriedly interrupted any attempt to question her. No one answered. They were still too shocked. Mari impatiently turned and rushed to Nico’s study. She halted at the threshold, took a deep, fortifying breath, and silently opened the door. He was not in there. She impatiently slammed the door and sprinted up the stairs to their bedroom.

Nico stood with his back to her, gazing unseeingly out the window into the lush garden beyond. He stiffened, his face wet with tears, and his body frozen in anguish. Above the smell of the vodka in his hands, he smelled his wife. Her perfume was always subtle, but it was her essence he always smelled when she entered a room. He had always liked that about their relationship, that they both had such sensitivity to each other’s presence. But he had been smelling her fragrance since he’d entered their bedroom, and there he’d stayed since he’d returned home. This was the one place in the house that was strictly theirs. She was evident everywhere in the room. He would always keep it so. If he could smell her, feel her aura, then it would not be so bad. He would not have completely lost her. He could keep her alive in his heart, his mind, for their daughter.

“Nico?” Mari whispered.

His body stiffened even further.

“Nico, look at me. I am here,” Mari cried.

“Mari?
Amata mia
?” he whispered tearfully.

“Yes.” Emotions constricted her vocal cords.

“Nico, look at me. I didn’t die in that fire today. In fact, I wasn’t even there.”

He could feel the heat of her body now, her scent stronger. He was afraid to believe.

“Nico, I…”

He suddenly turned, his breathing choppy as if he’d run miles.

“Mari?
Dio mio
!” he whispered in wonder and pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly, trying to absorb her into his skin. He kissed her long and hard, devouring her lips and frantically running his hands all over her, marveling in the feel of her flesh beneath his fingers.

He suddenly pushed her away from him, remembering how pissed he was with her.

“Where the hell were you all day? Why are you just getting home? Didn’t you hear the news broadcast? Who were you with? Why didn’t you call me?”