I Never Said I Was a Good Girl (9 page)

Chapter 18: Chyna

Today was one of the days that Zurich said he had to go back to Augusta for work and that he would be gone for a few days. I was use to him having to go back to Augusta for work since he has not taken kindly to the idea of relocating to Atlanta. Everything seems to be flowing great with him, but trying to get him to move to Atlanta was turning into a challenge which did make me a little nervous.

I decided, since he is busy, today would be a good day to go test the waters with Brazille. I want to see which Brazille I would get. The one that would hate on my relationship for whatever reasons she could think of or the one that would pretend me dating someone she once laid with didn’t faze her.

Even though we have been close for a lot of years, I still feel like I don’t know a third of what is really going on in Brazille’s life. We have been friends since ninth grade but she still never confided in me and told me why she walked out on Zurich. I mean when women are best friends and things go south with a man, the first thing you do is fill your best friend in on the mayhem that ensues. I can remember how he treated her like a queen. He waited on her hand and foot whenever she would let him, which of course we all know wasn’t often. There wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for her. I just didn’t get it.

I asked Brazille about it back in the day, but of course she shrugged it off saying something like ‘It was just time. The relationship had run its course.’ Then like clockwork she completely changed the subject on me like she did when she got that phone call at her little funky shop.

I am use to this and know not to waste my energy trying to get her to let me in. Now that I’m fucking Zurich, I’m going to try and get him to spill the beans. Shouldn’t be hard once I put it on him, especially since there seems to be quite a few moments when she is his favorite topic of discussion anyway.

I find myself praying often that Zurich is really serious about us and is not just trying to use me to get Brazille back. I have really fallen for him. In the short time we have been together, he has done things for me that no-one else ever has and even better I am not his mistress or side piece. We even went on a little mini vacation together which was lovely.

I finish my thoughts just as I reach the salon parking lot. I sigh and think out loud “Here goes nothing.”

I walk in the salon which is packed as usual. I see Brazille in the back filing away at a client’s nails. “
Hey Amber,”
I say, walking up to her desk
.

“Chyna! Where you been?”

Katasha, rolling her eyes, yells out, “
Oh you still know your way here. Some best friend.”

I look at her, roll my eyes back and give her the middle finger. This bitch don’t know me so I don’t know why she commenting.

Brazille looks upfront when she hears Katasha’s big mouth. She looks confused as she watches the exchange that play out between the two of us. I approach her station and smile,
“Katasha don’t want none B,”
I say trying to break the ice
.
Brazille gives me her business glare so I quickly change the subject.
“Business is still booming for you huh?”

“Yea business is going well,”
she replies, her eyes looking me up and down before going back to her client’s nails.

I sense that she has other things she would rather be discussing but knowing Brazille like I do she is not going to let out an inkling of her personal problems, and certainly not in front of her precious clients or employees.
“Chyna pull up a chair and be amazed while Natalie gets polished by Brazille!”

“You killed the shape on that lipstick nail B!”
I say as I play along.

“Thanks, I love this shape but it really only works on certain hand types, Natalie’s being one of them.”
She winks at Natalie and flashes her smile.

“Brazille you really know how to make me blush”
Natalie says while laughing and touching her cheek to her shoulder. She holds up her left hand and admires her new set of nails. Brazille asks Natalie to place both her hands flat on the nail station so she can dust all the file dust off her hands.

“Natalie go ahead and wash your hands make sure you use soap and scrub with the brush, please.”
Natalie pushes her chair back and heads to the bathroom.

“Brazille you seem like you have something on your mind. Be honest, what’s going on?”

“Chyna once I am done with Natalie we are certainly going to have that conversation”,
Brazille says, her big eyes unreadable.

“Why don’t we just start it now?”
I curl up my lip to let her know that I’m ready for anything she wants to bring.

“No,”
Brazille says, quick and short, still giving me the eye.

I rolled my eyes and leaned back in the chair crossing my arms. I tried to hold my cool and not punch this chick in the head and get thrown out of the salon. I really need to get some answers from her so I kept that in mind. Plus, I know deep down she’s just hating on me and Zurich.

Natalie comes out the bathroom and goes over to the rack to pick her polish. She picks up a powder blue from Essie and a midnight blue from Revlon. Natalie seems really torn between the two so Brazille says
“Nat, bring them both I can do this hot marble design using both colors! Trust me, you’ll love it!”
Brazille was so good at her job. She really knows how to give a customer what they wanted even, when the customer doesn’t know what he or she wants.

“Girl you are a lifesaver!”
Natalie says and spins around with a big grin on her face. She sits down content that she didn’t have to pick and waits on the end result.

Brazille has always seemed to be good at everything! On some level that has always irritated me immensely! She really does seem perfect but I know there is something in her past that will tarnish her armor. I, myself, believe that something has to do with Zurich. I stare at her while she polishes the Hell out of Natalie’s nails and wonder if we will ever get back to a place where she will do my nails again. I look away as tears begin to form in the corner of my eyes.

I just need her to understand that I want and deserve to be loved and adored by someone special, just as she has been time and time again. I want her to respect my love as I have done for her in the past. I am just tired of her negative comments when she doesn’t agree with whatever relationship I may be in at the time. I want her to be my friend, not my judge. I’m sick of her turning down her nose at me.

Brazille finishes Natalie’s nails and as usual, takes her regular pics for Facebook and Instagram. I hold in a sigh.
“Thanks for coming in Natalie!”

“Oh I will be back next week! This has become my weekly treat to myself!”

“I look forward to it. Check with Amber to see what’s still available because I get booked up quick.”

Natalie gives a thumbs-up and heads towards Ambers desk to set her appointment.

“Give me just a second Chyna”,
Brazille says as she is typing something on the computer.
“I have to let Amber know I will be unavailable for a while.”

“Sure.”
I responded while trying to get my thoughts together for this battle because I was determined to win this time.

“Alright Chyna I am done. Let us go in the lunch room.”
She turns and walks in the direction of the lunch room, like I have no choice but to follow her. I follow behind her.

Brazille opens the door to the lunch room and holds the door waiting for me to come in. She closes the door and takes a seat across the table from me. She looks at me and sighs.

“Brazille why are YOU sighing?” I ask, feeling my attitude ready to explode.

“I am sighing because I DON’T understand what has been going on with you lately. I DON’T understand where our friendship/sisterhood went. I certainly DO understand that you may be going through something with Joaquin but to turn to Zurich?! REALLY! Why the Hell would you even do that?” Brazille fires back.

“You don’t know anything about Joaquin and what I may or may NOT be going through with him! You only KNOW what you MAKE UP in YOUR head! In my opinion Zurich is fair game. You dumped him years ago and have not looked back. So really my question is why the hell do you even care?”

“You being with Zurich, is it just to TRY and hurt me?!”
she has the nerve to ask me.

I pound my fist on the table, really pissed off now,
“How do you always make everrrythingggg about you? I mean really, get over yourself! It’s not fucking about YOU! Zurich is attracted to me and I am attracted to him, period. We just mesh and the sex is off the chain! I need you to deal with the facts Brazille.”

Brazille points her finger at me and throws her head back and laughs. “
Nice one girl, nice one. So, at lunch, the reference to his ex not being able to handle him in bed, that was a reference to little old moi, huh?! You are hilarious. I’m glad the sex is great for you because it didn’t do a thing for me. But our standards have always been different,”
she says with her eyebrow arched and her lips curled up over her perfect teeth.
“You know what, I just want to double check and make sure we are talking about Zurich Nicholson? Is that who we are really talking about?” She even has the nerve to laugh out loud.

“Brazille, why do you always have to be such a BITCH?! What, because you don’t have it that now means it’s not good? His dick isn’t worth having because you are not riding it anymore? If memory serves me correctly you were riding this same dick for two years and I didn’t hear you complaining then!”
I am SO over this bitch and her arrogant ass. It’s all I can do to not slap that laugh out of her petty ass mouth.

I could tell I was getting under her skin, which is exactly what I want because now maybe she will be too mad not to be honest with me. Yup I pushed her over the edge because she temporarily lost control. “
You think I voluntarily wanted to ride that sorry dick?”
she says with her neck rolling, fingers pointing and voice escalating.
“I did it because I had to!”
After she realizes what she said, she stands up and storms out of the break room.

Now I really want to know why she felt like she “had to” sleep with Zurich for two years. What the fuck does that mean? What did he have on her was the reason she stayed with him? More importantly why was it not enough of a threat to keep her with him? See I knew the chick had her skeletons in her perfectly arranged closet. I’m going to find out what they are if that is the very last thing I do in life!

When I walk out of the lunch room and past Brazille’s station she isn’t there. It doesn’t surprise me because little Ms. Façade is not going to let anyone, especially her employees, see her upset or frazzled because then they would see she wasn’t perfect. Bitch.

Chapter 19: Brazille

I storm out of the lunch room and go straight into the bathroom to get a handle on my emotions. I shouldn’t have allowed her to get me into that space. If she wanted to continue being a runner up in some man’s life then so be it. She’s use to it at this point anyway.

I lean against the bathroom door and lock it. I was so livid when I was in there talking with Chyna! I normally can keep my cool something I learned to do from dealing with my mother. She loved to say things that would make even the calmest person want to cut someone’s throat. Today though, I let Chyna get to me. I think about how she had even driven me to the point where I debated telling her, forget that, showing her the texts where Zurich talked about how much he wanted me back, how he missed me, how he missed making love to me, how no other woman could compare, what he was willing to do for me! The dates on those texts would have been enough to show that fucking peon that he was using her to get to me! “Yet, you feel like leaving a married man for him was a power play! Chile please!” I say to myself.

I only decided against it because at this point I’m close to being done with Chyna’s ass anyway. I walked over to the counter and tap my nails on it as I look at myself in the mirror. I think to myself ‘Why did you let her get to you like that? You know better than that. She’s not even worth it.’ I try to stay as calm as possible, but knowing that I had let her make me say way more than I intended still has my blood boiling.

As usual, thinking about the past brings Zaire to mind. And, just as usual, the mere thought of him brings calmness to my brewing inner storms. I think back to the day we met. Zaire was six feet two inches tall with that Idris Elba build, that Blaire Underwood complexion, that Morris Chestnut smile, that Denzel Washington swagger and that wavy-straight Special Ed hair to top him off.

I had grown tired of working call center jobs listening to customers complain and cuss me out on a daily basis. I knew I was worthy of a better position so I decided to apply for some administrative, secretarial, or assistant positions. I wanted away from those headsets and the ridiculous metrics and asshole customers that came along with the call center life. I applied at several law, doctor, and dentist offices but felt I wasn’t getting anywhere and then Nicholson & Nicholson Law Offices called me in for an interview.

I almost flaked out on the interview when I saw Zaire. He was standing there with his black dress pants, tailored to a tee. His crisp white dress shirt was also custom tailored and had creases down the sleeves that looked sharp enough to slice through anything it came in contact with. His gold and diamond cufflinks were sparking under the room’s soft ambient lighting, catching and reflecting it into patterns on the wall. I couldn’t talk, hell I couldn’t think clearly looking at his fine ass. When we shook hands it was like there was bolt of electricity that went straight from my brain to my heart to my pussy, almost causing me to lose my balance a little. To this day I can’t remember the questions he asked or the answers I gave but I do remember he couldn’t seem to keep his eyes off of me and Lord knows I couldn’t take my eyes off of him.

He hired me right there on the spot and set up a business dinner for us to meet that night and discuss the details of my position. We talked for hours and, of course, most of the conversation had nothing to do with business at all. He came flat out and told me that he wanted me and that he hoped I felt the same way.

The one thing I did notice right way was that…
“Ms. English, are you in there?”
Amber yelled through the bathroom door, sending the past back to the past.

“Yes, Amber. I will be out in a minute.”
I turned the water on to splash a little cold water on my face.

“Okay because you got that big delivery you have been waiting on, the one with all the unique nail decals. I didn’t mean to bother you but I was sort of worried when I saw Chyna exit without speaking and then you never returned to your station.”
I could hear the concern in her voice. At least there was someone that I could depend on these days.

“OOOH YASSS! You know I love nail mail. No problem, thank you for checking on me but I am fine.”
I yelled back while I check myself in the mirror. I took a deep breath and decided to return to my station.

I get back to my station and I see the huge shipment sitting there which certainly helped to lighten my mood.  I start going through the shipment but my thoughts are still on Chyna. I didn’t know why Chyna came in MY salon, trying to parade my past in front of me by being with Zurich. I didn’t understand her new extreme interest in finding out why I broke up with Zurich five years ago. I don’t understand Zurich’s reasons for being here in Atlanta and pretending to want to be with someone he and I both know he couldn’t stand before. I don’t know why this Havoc individual was after me or who he or she even was. Shit, I don’t even know all the things that I don’t know any more. However, what I do know is that I want to be left alone.

I am going to clear two bases with one swing of my bat. First base will be making sure that Chyna understands that I don’t have to think it is all about me because it actually is ALL ABOUT ME! Second base will be me exposing Zurich’s twisted reasons for following me here to Atlanta and playing with Chyna’s heart and apparently the rest of her as well. Nasty ass side-piece trick.

I continue going through my shipment while waiting for my next client and begin to piece together my plan to meet with Zurich privately.