I don't Wear Sunscreen (10 page)

“
Do I smell breakfast?” he
asked.

“
What?”

“
I smell eggs, where? You
have them hidden?” he pulled her handbag.

“
That’s my hair, I applied
an egg to give it some shine,”

“
Oh man, I will take you to
a nice parlour this weekend Dolly,” he smiled.

“
Huh, no way, I don’t visit
parlours often, just for haircuts and that too once in a
year,”

“
I know, that’s why I am
taking you this weekend,”

“
No, I don’t want,
please,”

“
Come on, how will they make
money then? They depend on us, let’s buy them food,” he
chuckled.

“
What’s your brain made up
of, Sai? How can you come up with such an excuse to visit the
parlour?” she laughed.

“
Hellooooo,” Laksha’s mom
waved her hand, bringing Laksha back to the present.She said dully,
“Egg white, I apply egg white,” and walked to the table to eat
lunch. She kept fidgeting with a spoon, and her mom kept watching
the change with widened eyes.

“
What’s bothering you,
Laksha?” she asked her finally.

“
Nothing, just not in the
mood to eat,” she took a few seconds to get back to normal. She
realized it was no longer right to stay home, since it would reveal
the battle she was fighting within.“Mom, I want to leave,” she said
in a blunt tone.

“
Where? Back to work,
Mumbai?”

“
Yes, I have left all my
assignments and taken a big break. Since it’s a startup and the CEO
is happy with my work, he let me take the liberty. I don’t want to
extend it and take advantage of them,” she clarified.

“
Hmm. Let dad come, I will
let you know,” for the very first time, her mom considered
postponing a decision and that scared Laksha.

What if she is against me
going back to Mumbai? Why she is suddenly going to consult dad?
What they are going to discuss? They might ask me to stay back in
Chennai and find a job. That is not what I want, I can’t afford to
lose my job,”
she kept thinking things like
over and over again though another sleepless night, with tears
assisting them all along.

***

“
How would you like to
travel? Flight or train?” Laksha’s dad asked her while she kept
staring at the row of red ants walking across the old
wall.

She didn’t respond, so he touched her
shoulders and she turned swiftly, alarmed, to which he gave her a
puzzled look.

“
I didn’t notice you dad!
What were you asking, huh.? Did you say something?” she looked at
him, trying to gain her balance.

“
I asked whether you want to
take a flight or train dear, is something wrong with you?” he asked
in a concerned voice.

“
You have money, dad?” she
asked back.

“
What question is this? Just
tell me your preferred mode and that would do,” she had hit his ego
in the right spot, which turned him angry.

“
Sorry dad, a flight would
make things easier. I don’t want to use train anymore,” she
answered, not meeting his eyes. .

She thought about the furious dream she
had and went outside. She saw her dad talking over the phone to his
friend to check flight schedules.

“
Flight rates are high now
Laksha, I am trying my level best, don’t worry. I will make sure I
arrange a ticket as soon as possible,” her dad told her, noticing
her walk outside the room without looking back.

“
I am still okay with train,
if you or mom accompanies me,” she replied and turned to see if he
looked at her, but he didn’t.

“
I will go with her,” her
mom answered. “It’s been a long time since I visited Mumbai,” she
said.

“
I will book the tickets;
you’ll pack your bags. When do you want to return?” he asked her
mom and moved close to her. Laksha walked away quickly.

***

Chapter Nine

“
Hello, I’m calling from VE
interiors. Am I talking to someone from Laksha’s
family?”

“
Yes, I am her father,” the
voice responded.

“
Sir, sorry to inform you
that Laksha has been admitted in the hospital. We checked our
records and your number was given in her emergency
contacts,”

“
What? What happened to her?
Is she alright?”

“
Sir, please calm down. When
can you come over?”

“
I’m in Chennai right now,
but her mom is in Mumbai. I will contact her, but please tell me
what happened!”

“
Sir, can you please send
someone immediately? I don’t know what really happened; I am just
calling as per my instructions,”

“
Fine! Please give me the
hospital details, I will send her mom right away.”

***

“
She is all right now, we
will discharge her tomorrow. Please make sure you give her the
tablets regularly. If this happens again, we will have to do some
tests,” the doctor on call informed Laksha’s mom and moved
away.

Laksha didn’t have the courage to look
at her mother. Though the lady knew what the issue was, she was not
ready to ask Laksha about it.

“
I’m bored of this Horlicks
mom, can you please get me some coffee?” she asked her mom a little
angrily.

“
Shut up and sleep, will
you?” mom said, raising her left eyebrow, which a lot of people
can’t do.

The day was filled with silence and
small talk, and nobody asked Laksha about what had happened. Though
her mom was confused and almost on the verge of questioning her,
she kept thinking over again and again about Laksha without
spilling a bean. When her father called, she calmed him down and
explained that she would stay with Laksha for some time. She also
asked him to cancel her return tickets.

“
Tell me what you want to do
Laksha, do you want to talk to me about something?
Or do you want to do something
different today,
” her mom asked.

“
Hmm. Now that I have lost
my job, what else have I got to do? I don’t know what to do,”
Laksha finally said what was on her mind, sipping the hot coffee
with extra sugar and looking out the window.

“
What made you behave like
this, Laksha?”

“
Love, mom. Love for my job
and my career. I saw my career progression happen in that office. I
don’t know why I shouted and screamed like a wild cat when the
receptionist didn’t allow me in. I wanted to meet Saurav and ask
him why, but she said I could not, because I’d got a pink
slip,”

“
Well, she did her
job,”

“
I did too; do you know how
hard I worked? Don’t talk to me about my job,” with that, Laksha
screamed again. Her eyeballs moved rapidly and she clenched her
head tightly with her hands as if she was getting hit with a
hammer.

“
Relax Laksha, you’re
freaking me out, for God sake! Doctor, Doctor.” her mom ran out to
call for help.

A rush of two hours kept everyone
alarmed. For the first time, she realized what was happening to her
daughter, and was aghast seeing her shouting wildly.

The only confidence the family had was
in her being right next to her daughter, so they sounded relaxed
after the first period of anxiety passed.

“
You will take care of her,
I know that. Please bring back our daughter as she was, I know you
will,” her husband left a short text message, which brought a smile
to her lips, relieving some of the tension she had been under the
whole day.

An hour later, the nurse informed her
that Laksha was injected with a sedative to relax her. She was to
be left undisturbed till she woke up on her own.

“
I want to know the details
of what happened,” her mom said.

“
I know, I will check with
the doctor, please wait,” the nurse said, giving her an
understanding look.

After about forty minutes, the nurse
appeared again and directed Laksha’s mom to a different room to
meet a new doctor. This doctor had a few files on her table with
the name “Laksha” on them

“
I am Laksha’s mom,” she
said with a look of hesitation. She assumed there were a large
number of reports within the folder.

“
Hello, I’m Dr. Namrata.
Please don’t be worried. I understand your situation. Your daughter
will be alright,”

“
Can you tell me what
happened to Laksha in one sentence? And then, whatever, I don’t
understand, you can elaborate on that. I am strong, you don’t have
to worry about me, I’m very practical.” She said firmly, adjusting
her posture.

“
Laksha has
PTSD.”

“
Ok.. A little more in
detail, please,”

“
It’s called Post Traumatic
Stress Disorder.”

Chapter Ten

“
I know
that you already know what happened to Laksha, when she got lost.
So stop trying to hide it from me. I am her father and I want to
know what’s happening to her,”

“
That’s so
sweet
of you, great that you figured it out,” said his
wife.

“
What’s wrong with
her?”

“
Can I reveal the flashback
a little later? I have some work,”

“
So this is why I rushed to
Mumbai, is it? I am her father; I want to know what’s
wrong!”

“
To sum it up, she was
betrayed by someone she trusted, her legs were pulled from under
her by her beloved. She lost her
job
when she was trying to be
calm. Everything
together
pushed her to the limit, so she
slipped into acute depression,” Laksha’s mom said in a flat
voice.

“
Is the depression a part of
heredity?”

Silence crept in. She stood
like a statue for a minute, suddenly remembering the toughest part
of her life.
She was
raped by four men when she was sixteen, thrown out by her family
and treated in an orphanage by a distant relative, whose children
were now very close to her..
It took her
years to recover from the traumatic event and the depression it
caused. During the orphanage visits, she met a wonderful guy who
fell in love with her. Now, he is Laksha’s dad, a proud
father
and husband, a man whose world revolves around his two
girls.

“
I
didn’t mean to hurt you, but it was so hard for you to become the
person you are now. I made sure nothing hurts your heart and gave
you space to be yourself.
I can’t really
take
it
if our daughter has fallen into the same trap.” He
said sadly.

“
I
wouldn’t mind my daughter falling into the same trap if there was
someone who could help her get over the trauma like you did for
me,” she admitted, while her eyes filled with tears.

Life pulls down every person
to the least possible negativity and thrusts them outward to shine.
It is the fight that matters; when you
reach
the bottom, you
are left with no choice but to pick yourself up and climb every
difficult step. Feeling down and letting situations tear you apart
proves that we all are human and nothing more or less.
So, there is no need to worry
about the devastating moments; there will come a moment when you
will be forced to stand for your rights and make one single move
that will pull you into the world of success.
Seize the moment and grow, that’s all you can do and that’s
why you are born.

Life is never easy; there
will be one issue after another to test your nerves.
It might be beloved’s death, a
severe health problem, career stumbles, breakups, divorces,
loneliness, and anything else. Be strong and make sure your days
mean something, find out what helps you grow towards fulfilling
your satisfaction.

“
I was afraid so I acted as
if I didn’t know to swim. He assured me that he would help me and
held my hands tight. He didn’t leave at any point, and I felt his
love in the way he clenched my hands. I strongly believe in the
connection between us, but I just could not digest the fact that he
did all this just to betray me.” Laksha coughed, and took a short
break from narrating her story to have some water.

“
What if both Sai and Prabhu
are not one and the same? What if Pallavi lied? How can you believe
that they are the same person just on her word?” Like an arrow the
question hit Laksha, and she widened her eyes without moving the
bottle from her mouth.

“
Mom, Its
Pallavi,”

“
That’s why I am questioning
you.

“
There are a lot of
questions in my head now, what should I do?”

“
Take these tablets and
sleep, I will clear the mess and you can take your course of action
after that,”

The next few days were bleak, and
Laksha found it difficult to sleep without medicines. The
disturbing flashback of the day where she saw Priyanka, her
friend’s sister who accompanied them on the Pondicherry trip, all
drunk and getting exploited in public turned chronic, running on
behind her eyelids even when she tried to sleep. The way she ran to
her rescue, her attempts to save her and getting back stabbed in
return, holding Priyanka’s hands and running and finally, getting
hold of someone to help..all of it was still a
nightmare.