I Can Hear You (3 page)

“What do you want to eat?”  Becky asked as I turned back around. 
Please say pizza.

Laughing I said, “Would you like to have pizza for lunch?”

“I would love to.  It’s almost like you read my mind.”  She said with such sincerity that I couldn’t help but snicker.  She felt like family to me and I loved the way she could lighten my mood without even knowing that I needed it.  If she only knew the things I had heard and seen today.

“You know, you could just say you want pizza.  You don’t have to think it over and over again hoping I will say it.”

“How can I test you if I just blurt out what I want?  Just consider it practice, like exercising your brain.”  Shaking my head, I know I had a silly smile on my face.  Believing what she said, Becky had no idea how strong my ability was.  I also hadn’t told her that the older I got, the stronger it became. 

“Come on, let’s go.”  

We finished lunch and decided to shop for some new clothes.  While walking around I saw a cute little family and it made me smile.  My mind started wandering again and I found myself thinking of my parents. Lost in my own world, a man bumped my shoulder when we passed and jarred me from my thoughts.  What a jerk!  He didn’t even say
sorry,
he just kept on walking.

After shopping the rest of the day, Becky and I were finally on our way home.  I didn’t see any more of my mystery man or the red-eyed demon guy, although it didn’t stop me from thinking about them… about him. 

“Now that I’m going with Charlie to the prom and you have an awesome dress, we have to find you a date so we can all go together.  Who would you want to go with?”  Becky casually hinted while glancing at me from the corner of her eye.

Since moving here, Becky has always been my best friend even though I couldn’t share some things with her, like what happened today.  I almost wanted to laugh at the thought.  I watched two non-humans fight to the death and now we were back to prom.  Because of my life experiences, I knew I acted much older than my almost eighteen, but I would do almost anything for Becky.

“I don’t know.  I could just go by myself and meet you there.”  After such an eventful day, I just wanted to go home and not think about anything, especially a stupid dance.

“No, we have to find you a date.  You’ll enjoy it a lot more if we do.”  I could hear the determination in her voice.

“I don’t know Becky.  Let’s wait until Monday and see how it goes.” 
Please let’s not talk about this anymore.
I thought as I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. 

“Ok, but I’m not going to let you forget it.” With closed eyes, I chuckled because I knew she wouldn’t.  She would pester me to death until I had a date.

When we arrived home, I waved goodbye to Becky and headed for the house.  It was only 10 pm but the porch light was on and Sarah was already in bed.  I climbed the steps and headed to my room, dressed for bed and while lying there, I replayed the events of the day over-and-over in my head.  I knew sleep wouldn’t come tonight as I was left with more questions than answers.

I met Becky Monday morning and as she drove us to school, I smiled slightly as I heard the turmoil churning in that head of hers. 
I wonder if she’s thought about a date for the prom.  How do I ask her without seeming like I’m badgering her?
Who should she go with?
  Her thoughts just kept coming while I sat silently beside her.  I loved the fact that she forgot I was different.  She treated me like any other seventeen-year-old girl, as a friend.

“So Amber, have you thought anymore about the prom and who you would like to go with?”  She asked without looking my way.

“Not really.  There are several boys I that I think are cute but I’m sure they wouldn’t go with me.”

“Quit being so negative, you’re beautiful and a lot of boys would ask if they thought you’d say yes.  They’ve just learned over the years that you never say yes.  Whoever you ask will probably pass out from surprise.”

“Shut up, they will not!”  Would they?  I really didn’t know.  They stopped asking me out two years ago and now they didn’t even think about asking me out. I knew that for sure.

We arrived at school, and after locking the car door we walked up the front steps.

“Oh, yes, they will.  Just wait and see.”  She smirked.  “Ok, I have to get to class.  I’ll see you at lunch.”  She turned and headed down the hall.

“Ok, see ya.”  I headed off to math class wondering what Mr. Hooker had in store for me today.  Sitting in my chair, I looked around at the boys and noticed there were some really cute ones.  I just needed to decide who I wanted to ask.  I hoped that whoever it was would say yes so I wouldn’t have to pick someone else.  One time would be hard enough. 

When class was over, I realized Mr. Hooker hadn’t tried to catch me day dreaming that day, unaware and without the answer to whatever math problem he came up with.  I walked up to his desk, and as he lifted his head, I asked, “Are you ok Mr. Hooker?”  He smiled and I heard him think, I
just finally gave up.  You’re just too smart.

“Everything is fine.  Why do you ask?”  He smiled politely.

“I don’t know.  I just wanted you to know that I’ve always looked forward to your class and I will miss you when I graduate.  You have taught me a great deal and I wanted to say thank you.”  I gave him my best smile.  He really was a great teacher and most of the time I enjoyed our little game.

“Thank you, Amber.” 
I’m sure I didn’t teach you much but it’s nice to hear that you enjoyed it.
I nodded, and then left.

As I walked down the hall, I noticed Dean standing near my locker.  He was cute with his dark brown shaggy hair.  Looking nervous, he kept shifting his weight from foot to foot.  I slowed my pace to see what might be happening, but I understood the closer I got.
I can’t believe I’m going to ask Amber to the dance.  Why am I doing this?  I know she’ll say no.  God, I’m going to kill Becky if she says no.  She is the prettiest girl in school, there’s no way in hell she’ll say yes
.  “Hi Dean.”  I grinned at him as I approached my locker. 
Oh God, I can’t do this! 
I didn’t know what to do to help him.  I knew I steered clear of most people, well everyone besides Becky, but I had a good reason.   I couldn’t even hold a boy’s hand without him wondering if he could get to second base and devising ways to make it happen.
Shut up Amber, this is for Becky! 
I reminded myself.

“Hi Amber.”  He cleared his throat.  “I was wonde…” He cleared his throat a second time and I hid my smile.  “I was wondering if you would like to go to prom with me.”  He exhaled slowly.
I did it.  I didn’t think I could, but I did!

As I stared at him, I couldn’t help but let my smile show.  He stood at about five-feet-ten and had a slender build.  Not very muscular, but he still looked good.  “Okay.”  He smiled as I heard him think, Yes? 
Yes!  She said yes!  Oh my God!  What do I do now?  Okay, think.  Be cool.
“Okay, good.”  His smile was wide as it split his face.

“We’ll talk about the details later, I have to get my books and get to class.”  I quickly opened my locker and switched out my books.

“Okay, cool.  See ya at lunch.”  He turned and walked away but I could still hear him.
I can’t believe I have a date with Amber!  I can’t wait to tell everyone!
I couldn’t help but giggle as I wondered if he might skip down the hallway.

When the bell finally rang, I headed to the cafeteria only to find Becky sitting with Charlie.  I slowed my pace wondering if I should sit somewhere else when Becky looked my way. “Come on, we saved you a seat.”
I hope she’s not mad at me for inviting Charlie.

After I sat down next to Becky, I said, “Hi Charlie, how’s it going?”  His relieved expression told me he worried I would be upset about him joining us, even if I hadn’t heard it.

“Good.  We were just talking about prom.”  He looked at Becky and smiled. 
I hope I can get her alone.  Wonder if I should plan to stay all night with her. 

“So Amber, are you going with anyone?”  Becky asked with a mischievous grin.

“As a matter of fact I am. Dean asked me this morning and I agreed.” 
Thank God!
  I smirked. As we started eating, a shadow fell across me and when I looked up, I found Dean standing there holding a tray.

“Mind if I sit with you?”  He looked hopeful. 
Please say I can.  I told everyone I was….

“Sure, have a seat.”  I smiled as he let out a slow breath.  “We were just talking about prom.  I can’t believe it’s next Saturday.”

“And graduation is two weeks after that,” Becky added.

We sat there and made our plans.  Charlie and Dean would pick us up at Becky’s house and we would all ride together.  I knew Becky felt excited about our double date but I was less than enthused about the idea.  But if I could do this and make her happy, then I would gladly do it for her.

The bell saved me from any more prom plans and as I walked to my most hated class, I heard that the news of my date had reached many of my classmates. My attempt at normal had backfired. I wanted to blend in but now everyone was talking about me. 

I heard some of the girl’s thoughts even though I didn’t want to. 
Why did Dean ask Awkward Amber! She’s so weird, she never dates so why now
, and
I wish I had her hair.
  When I heard some of the guys, I couldn’t help but smile.
Why didn’t I ask her, Dean is so lucky!
Some were nice to hear but Gina hit a sore spot with her dig,
He’s probably trying to get some virgin action.
It was a nice reminder that I could not and would not see myself with Dean or any other guy.

That night while lying in bed, my mind automatically went to the sword wielding man.  It had been several days and I now questioned whether it actually happened or not.  I hadn’t seen anything else since leaving the mall.  Turning onto my side and pulling the sheets up to my chin, I finally drifted off to sleep.

“Mom, why do we have to move again?”

“I’m sorry baby, but it’s not safe here anymore.”  She hurriedly threw clothes into a suitcase.

“But why?  We haven’t been here very long.”  I stood holding a blanket and a stuffed lamb while standing in my PJ’s.

“I promise I’ll tell you one day, but right now I don’t have time.  We need to hurry baby.”  She slammed the suitcase shut, zipped it up and grabbed my hand as we left.”  

I woke up with a start.  What the hell was that?  I didn’t even remember that we moved around a lot.  Actually, I hardly remembered anything about my mother.  I settled back down with the covers pulled up so only the top of my head showed and I drifted back to sleep.

“What time are you coming over, Amber?”  Becky called and woke me up.  I hadn’t slept much last night because of the dreams.  

“Becky, it’s 9:30 in the morning.  We don’t need to get ready until this evening.  I’m going back to sleep.”  I started to hang the phone up but heard her yell.

“Wait!”  I held it to my ear for a few seconds.  “I’m sorry I woke you.  I’m just so excited and nervous.  I need you to come over early just so I’ll have someone to talk to.  I can’t tell mom any of these things.  You know how she is.  If she finds out how excited I am to go out with Charlie, she’ll hound me to get every little piece of information she can.”  I laughed.  Trina, Becky’s mom, was exactly like that.  Being an only child, Trina like to be involved with everything Becky did.  Sometimes I really envied her, having a mother to love her that much.

“Okay, let me get up and get dressed.  I’ll be over soon and we’ll spend the day together.”  I hung up and headed for the shower.  As I stood under the hot spray, I said a little prayer.
Please Lord, help me get through this.
Needless to say, I wasn’t looking forward to tonight. I’d had a hard week and it seemed my gift was growing stronger every day.  I didn’t want to go.  I didn’t want to know what Charlie and Dean had in store for us.  Becky had asked me not to tell her anything.  She wanted to be a normal girl on a date for prom and I couldn’t blame her for that.  I would love to be normal instead of knowing everything Dean was thinking. Oh well, I could also wish for world peace, but that wouldn’t happen either.

I headed downstairs and found Sarah sitting at the breakfast table.   She smiled even though I knew it was fake.  She’d had a hard week too and I heard her last night. She cried for her daughter, her husband and for herself. She hoped I wouldn’t get ready here so she wouldn’t have to hide her tears and then felt guilty for thinking that.  She kept thinking about her daughter getting ready for prom, missing the dress shopping and helping with her hair and makeup.  I hated being a constant reminder. 

“Good morning, sweetheart.  What’s the plan for today?”  She put on a happy face for me.  

“I’m going over to Becky’s.  She’s nervous about the dance tonight.”  I grabbed a bowl from the cabinet and poured some cereal and milk.  I then retrieved a spoon from the drawer and after placing my bowl on the kitchen table, I poured myself a cup of coffee. 

“Already? I thought you might want to sleep in. You’ve looked especially tired this week.”  Sarah was right; my body was exhausted because my mind wouldn’t stop.

“I am tired but Becky needs me today.”  That’s the understatement of the year.  I smiled a little just thinking about her phone call.

“You’re a good friend to her and I’m proud of you for that. Are you looking forward to tonight?” She asked, and thought the same words. I was thankful.

“I don’t know.  To be honest, I’m kind of dreading tonight and I’ll be glad when it’s over.”  I saw her face fall and regretted my words immediately.  I wish I could be somewhat normal, but I’m not and Sarah has no idea what to say to me. 

She always wanted to take her daughter shopping, dress her up and even teach her about boys.  She dreamed of dances, first dates and comforting me through broken hearts.  Instead, she got short polite conversations because I couldn’t be around her long and she couldn’t stop thinking about her daughter, Megan.  I just reminded her of what she was missing.  There were no past boyfriends, no shopping and this was my first dance and I didn’t even want to go to it.  I wish I could have given her what she needed, but I came to terms with it a long time ago, but Sarah deserved better than me.  She deserved Megan. 

“I’m sorry, Sarah,” I whispered while looking down. At times like these, the weight of her loss make mine look trivial. I knew how hard it was for her to try to be a mother to me but there were things a Seventeen-year-old was not supposed to have to deal with! I’m supposed to be self-centered and excited to go to the prom.  Feeling sorry for myself, I thought about mom again.  If she were alive, would I be like Becky? Would I want to avoid her at all cost? More questions than answers these days…

“Will you at least have Trina take a picture of you all together?”  She tried to smile, but her eyes held so much pain it was crushing me.  I had to leave.

“Yes, of course I will and I’ll send it to you before I leave,” Putting my dishes in the old farmhouse sink, I turned to her. “I’m going to head out.  It’ll be late tonight so I’ll just spend the night over there.”  Hesitating, I wrapped my arms around her neck for a hug and whispered, “Thank you Sarah, for everything.”  Letting go, I grabbed my bag and dress and headed to the door. 

As I walked to Becky’s I looked at the turn-of-the-century houses. They have been well cared for, that was obvious.  I waved at the people I passed that were sitting in chairs on their front porches, thankful for these silent exchanges.

The flowers were all in bloom with bright colors. The morning was warm with the promise of a warm day and chilly evening. Yes this is the way small town life should be, beautiful and silent. I wish everyday could be like this, except for the part that’s coming, the prom. For the first time I wished more than three blocks separated Becky’s house and mine.

I arrived a little before eleven and Becky burst through open the front door, grabbed my hand, and we headed for her room.  After shutting the bedroom door, she turned, “Oh my God!  Tonight’s the prom!  I’m so excited! And nervous!”  She quietly squealed, not wanting her mom to hear.

“Calm down.”  I chuckled.  I loved seeing her so happy.

“I can’t!  I have a date with Charlie!  You know how long I’ve had this huge crush on him.  I just can’t believe he asked me to go with him tonight.”  She moved over to sit on her bed, tucking her legs underneath her.  I followed and then sat on the other side, facing her.  “I wonder if he’ll kiss me.  I wonder if he’ll try anything else.”

I just sat there and waited.  Becky had to work things out for herself and right now she didn’t want advice, at least not unless she asked for it.  “I know some couples are staying in a tent out by the lake.  Did you know they were camping tonight?”

“I know that usually happens every year.”  There was one hotel in town and nobody wanted to rent a room, the town was just too small.  All the couples that wanted to spend the night together
camped.

“What do I do if Charlie wants me to go camping with him?”  I could hear her actually considering it, but felt scared to go.

“Why don’t you just wait and see how tonight goes, and if he ask, then you can decide if you want to or not.” 

She let out a long slow breath.  “Okay, I won’t verbally obsess about it. I can’t help it if you hear me though.” She grinned and I knew she would torture me the rest of the day with her thoughts.  

“Okay, what do you want to do today?”  I asked even though I knew.  “Wait!  I know what we can do!  We can paint our nail, do our makeup and our hair and when we finish we can do it again!” I said with my pretend giddy voice.

Becky gave me the stink eye before saying, “I was thinking the same thing.  Amazing!  It’s like you can read minds or something.” She giggled.

After eating a grilled cheese sandwich for dinner, we decided it was time to get dressed.  Becky had her hair pinned up with some wisps hanging down around her face, while I decided to leave mine down.  As I was zipping up her dress, I heard the doorbell ring.  Becky turned and quietly squealed.  I couldn’t help but laugh. This was her night and I was glad I was sharing it with her.

I followed Becky to the stairs and we took a peak at the boys. They did look good. As if they sensed our presence, or maybe heard our giggles, they looked up with astonishment. I suppose we looked a little different too. “Wow” flew from their mouths simultaneously. I loved it when that happened. Not thinking if it was the right thing, if it would embarrass them later, just an honest expression. Becky and I smiled with satisfaction as we sashayed down the stairs. She’d made me practice this walk earlier so I would get it right.

Trina had us pose for pictures as couples, individually, boy pictures, girl pictures and pictures with her. Yes, a whole photo shoot but we wrapped it up in 30 minutes so it wasn’t too bad. I dutifully sent my picture to Sarah. 

As we walked outside, I was surprised to see that they brought separate cars. Dean in his dad’s prized Corvette and Charlie in his shined up Charger. Becky shrugged at me then smiled as she walked along beside Charlie.  She climbed in the passenger’s seat when he opened the door for her. Dean answered my question before I ask it.
I’m not messing up things with Amber tonight. No way I’m asking her to go camping with me
. I smiled at him as he opened the door for me. Maybe this could work. We listened to music on the way, passing Charlie and Becky and then they passed us laughing and having a good time.

When we arrived at the dance, Dean took my hand as we walked inside. Nervousness hit me when I noticed all the people.  I looked at Dean and smiled, willing his mind to think of something other than me. 
I can’t believe I’m with her.  She’s gorgeous.  I wonder how far she’ll let me get tonight.  Maybe I should ask her to go camping with me, especially if Becky goes with Charlie.  The other guys are so jealous.
  His thoughts rolled through my mind and I tried to act like the other girls. “Want to dance?” he asked.  He looked good in his black tux and he had been a perfect gentleman so far, at least in actions.

“Sure.”  He took my hand and led me to the dance floor. 

As we danced, I lost myself. I have always avoided dances because of the crowd so I was surprised at the adrenalin rush I felt. I saw Becky and Charlie a couple of times but somehow it is less about her in this moment. I knew she was happy and I enjoyed dancing; with the music loud in my ears, it drowned out the voices, at least for a while. An hour later, tired and sweaty, we decided to get something to drink.

We left the dance floor and headed to the refreshment table.  I had never been so thirsty. We talked to his friends and that’s when it hit me. All of the voices that were shut out on the dance floor came at me like a two-ton truck. It must have showed on my face because Dean looked concerned.   I was physically tired and mentally exhausted. There were so many people so close together and with so many thoughts!  My head hurt worse than if I sat in front of a music speaker with its volume wide open.  I needed to leave.

Before I could excuse myself, I felt the shivers run down my arms.  As I slowly turned, searching for its cause, I didn’t see anything unusual.  Carefully looking at each person standing near the door, I found Myra looking straight at me with hate in her eyes.

I couldn’t hear any of her thoughts, but I did hear the screeching sound the demon man had made.  It sounded more muted now, lost in the sea of thoughts and the noise in the room.  Before I could show any signs of fear, I acted as though I was looking for someone.  I turned my head to the next person and continued my slow scan. 

As I stood there shaking, Becky walked up and turned her head in the direction of my gaze.  When I looked back at her, she was staring at Myra with a challenging look.  “Becky, what are you doing?”  I hissed.

“Staring at Myra.  That bitch tried to get Charlie to dance with her earlier.  Don’t worry, I’m just giving her a warning,” she said, turning to face me.  Noticing my pale face and trembling hands, she asked, “Amber, what’s wrong?”

How could I possibly tell her she wasn’t staring at Myra?  Well, maybe she was but Myra
felt
evil.  I needed to leave.  Somewhere deep inside I knew that thing was searching for me.  There were so many questions with no way to find answers right now.  “I don’t feel well.  I think I need to head home.  I’m going to tell Dean bye.”  I gave her a hug.  “Have fun!”  I hurried away in the opposite direction, not giving her a chance to respond.

I found Dean standing near the punch bowl talking with Zack and Sandy. As I walked up to him, he smiled when he noticed my approach and reached for my hand.  “Dean, I don’t feel well and I think I need to go home.”  His face dropped and I could tell he wasn’t happy, but I couldn’t help it. 

“Let my drive you” he offered. Sweet, but I needed silence to help my pounding head. 

“No you stay and have a good time. I called Sarah.” I’m such a liar!  “I had a good time.”  I kissed him on the cheek; he gave me a disappointed smile and said he did too.

Slipping out the side door, hopefully unnoticed by Myra, I didn’t know how I would get home. I felt much better just being outside in the chilly air; the pain eased as I tilted my head back and closed my eyes.  I felt the slight wind brush across my face.  It didn’t last long.

I felt the shivers run down my arms again and when I opened my eyes, I saw Myra headed my way.  I tried to hide my trembling hands and act as if nothing was wrong.  As she got closer, I turned my head toward her and said in a cheerful voice, “Hey Myra, how’s it going?”  Then I gave her my best smile hoping she couldn’t hear my pounding heart or smell the fear wafting from my body.  I didn’t know what these things were, but I’ll admit they scared the shit out of me.

She stopped her progress toward me, cocked her head to the side in an unnatural way and let out a loud screeching sound.  Pretending not to
hear
anything even though I wanted desperately to cover my ears, I waited for her answer as if we were having a normal conversation.  She stared at me for a few more minutes with a confused look and then I saw it. A shadow left her body and her thoughts returned. “What am I doing at here?” she asked, confused.