Hustlin' (16 page)

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Authors: L. Divine

BOOK: Hustlin'
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Nigel looks like he just got the wind kicked out of him. “Mom, church isn't going to help and I'm not going. Me and Mickey have plans.”
“The hell you do,” Mrs. Esop says, claiming her son's arm and snatching him out of Mickey's clutches.
Oh shit, it's about to go down now.
“Mrs. Esop, with all due respect, me being pregnant isn't the worst thing for Nigel.” Mickey looks at Nigel standing with his parents and realize she's got a battle on her hands.
I told her it wasn't going to be easy.
Mrs. Esop looks at Nigel. “We moved you out of that neighborhood so you wouldn't get caught up. But somehow you managed to anyway.” She sobs into her husband's shoulder, making the horrible scene even that much more dramatic.
“Hustlers, all of them. I'm so disappointed in you, son.” Even Mr. Esop's joined the bandwagon.
Just when I can't take any more, Rah comes to the rescue. “Let's bounce, Jayd. Can you get Rahima for me? I'll get her diaper bag out of the game room.”
I walk over to where his daughter's playing and gently swoop her up into my arms.
“You're getting pretty good at that, little mama,
” my mom says, invading the moment. I don't want her in my thoughts right now. I have to concentrate on getting out of this ugly scene. Rah signals for me to make a move toward the door and I'm right behind him.
“Well, next time you don't want me in your head, don't think silly thoughts. Take for example you wishing that little girl was yours,”
my mom says, taking the thought right out of my head. It was only for a split second, but it was there. Damn, she's got skills. Too bad she didn't stay in the game. We could've used her against Esmeralda.
“Mom, that was a fleeting thought, nothing more. You know I don't want any babies right now. I'll talk to you later.
” I think back and I can feel her presence dissipate.
Rah looks at me quizzically, wondering what I'm thinking. Then he smiles slightly and gives me a look of recognition: he knows it's got something to do with my spiritual side. He shakes his head from side to side while opening the car door for us. It isn't a bad picture, us being a family. But, as usual, I've spoken way too soon.
“Mom, I need to take Mickey home,” Nigel says, leaving his distraught parents standing in the doorway and escorting Mickey to his car. I guess they've gotten bolder with their relationship if he's picking her up from home now.
Before we can escape, a car slowly rolls in front of Nigel's house, blocking in the driveway.
“Rah, what the hell is that witch doing with my child?” Sandy says, creeping up in her new man's car.
What did she do, track his ass down with GPS?
“Ah damn,” Rah says, taking Rahima from my arms before Sandy can get out of the car and do it herself.
I'd think Sandy wouldn't want to start something in front of her daughter, but she doesn't look like she cares too much about her daughter seeing her get live. I'm going to stay out of this and let Rah handle his baby-mama bull.
“Rah, I know you hear me talking to you,” she says, getting out of the car and approaching Rah's Acura. Mickey and Nigel close their car doors, ready to make an exit of their own, but Nigel's parents walk over to his car.
Now, ain't this some shit?
“Sandy, keep your voice down. This ain't your hood,” Rah says, fully aware of the ghetto scene they are creating.
Nigel's parents look disgusted and victorious in their self-righteous, judgmental attitude toward us folks who still love being from the hood.
“Ra-Ra, come on, baby. It's time to go,” Sandy says, snatching her daughter's arm from a vexed Rah. Rahima looks up at her daddy and starts to scream like someone's murdering her.
“Sandy, what the hell is wrong with you?” Rah says, trying to keep his voice down for the sake of their daughter, but it's impossible. Sandy's determined to show her ass today, damn the consequences.
“What's wrong with me? What's wrong with
you
?” Sandy says, successfully taking Rahima away from her daddy and getting into the car with her mute dude. “It's Ra-Ra or Jayd, Rah. You can't have them both.”
Rah looks at me, defeated and embarrassed. Mr. and Mrs. Esop look at the scene with their noses up so high in the air I can read their minds.
Sandy's man's car speeds off down the block and all we can do is watch.
“These types of situations don't become us, Nigel.” Mrs. Esop looks up at her husband and speaks in a monotone. “Talk to your son.” She then looks down at Mickey and then at Nigel. “We'll see you at church this evening.” She goes back into the house, followed by her husband. Mr. Esop looks perplexed and I can feel his confusion. But Nigel just looks ticked off, and so does Rah. How did such a cool afternoon turn into a horrific evening?
Rah's vexed about Sandy, Nigel about his parents, and all of us are powerless. Well, not all of us. When I get home, I'll try to find something in the spirit book to help us out of this tangled web we've all played a part in weaving. I still don't see how any of this is my fault, but I feel guilty and bad because my friends are going through it and I'm too emotionally beat to help them much. All I want to do is sleep this afternoon off and that's exactly what I plan on doing when I get back to Mama's house. I'll leave the spirit work for another day.
10
Sleepwalking
“Wide awake in a dream/
I'm looking at you.”
—BARRY BIGGS
 
 
 
“J
ayd, I'm going to kill her,” Rah says through my cell. He just dropped me off after a silent ride home. And now he wants to talk about what happened a little while ago with Sandy at Nigel's house. I don't blame him for wanting to get rid of Sandy, but murder isn't the answer.
“That wouldn't be a very nice Christmas present for your daughter.” Or maybe it would be. I just know Rah shouldn't be the one to wrap a bow round that gift. As many enemies as Sandy's made, it's just a matter of time before someone jacks her ass up. Sandy's trifling, plain and simple. I think we are all better off without her around, Rahima included. But there's got to be a better way to deal with it than violence.
“My dad used to say some people are worth more dead than alive.” Rah pauses. I can hear his heavy breathing through the phone. I wish I could see his face and hold his hand as tears of anger fall from his ebony eyelashes. I've only seen Rah cry twice in his life: when his daddy got locked up and when he realized Sandy had left with his baby. “I know what he meant by that now.”
“Okay, I think you've completely lost it. You know better than to say shit like that over the phone. The man is listening.” I know Rah's not in the mood for jokes, but I had to deliver that one. He's not feeling me right now because I could usually get a smile or a chuckle out of him. I hate feeling Rah in so much pain. I feel for Nigel too, because, from the way his mother looked at Mickey today, he's going to be feeling Rah's anguish soon himself.
“Jayd, I'm serious. What am I going to do about this girl?”
“Honestly, I don't know, Rah. But if I've learned anything from playing Lady Macbeth for the past few weeks, it's that murder's never the answer. She lost her damned mind when she plotted to kill the king, for real. I don't want to see you sleepwalking like a crazy person.” Rah laughs at my rationale, but still can't let the subject of Sandy go. At least I managed a small laugh out of him, momentarily. But he's still talking about Sandy and, as a good friend, I have to listen.
“I know. I'm not going to hurt her. But I have to get Rahima away from her. I don't want her to end up crazy like her mama.” Now
that
would be a real tragedy. I step into the kitchen to find bags of Popeye's chicken and biscuits on the table. I don't know who decided to play Santa Claus, but I'm grateful for the Christmas spirit. I grab a two-piece with potato wedges and green beans and head back to Mama's room.
“Yeah, she's a sweet little girl. I pray she's too young to remember any of this shit.”
I take my bags of food and clothes to Mama's room, ready to eat and catch up on our weekends, only to find that she's not in here. She must be working late at the shelter. It's after six and I hope she'll be home soon. Mama doesn't need to overexert herself. Noticing the open bathroom door across the hall, I decide to seize the opportunity and take a bath while the bathroom's free. I can warm my food up and eat afterwards.
“Me too, Jayd. Me too.”
If I could melt all of Rah's baby-mama issues away, I would. But right now I'm going to concentrate on melting away my own problems in a nice, hot bubble bath. I put my food down on the large dresser next to the bedroom door and pick up a bottle of Mama's bubble bath. She usually gives me a beauty package for Christmas with all of her best products in it. I hope some of this lavender, orange, and honey bubble bath is in my basket this year, along with this large mango candle she recently made. This will really help me relax.
“All I can say is be patient, Rah. Things will turn around. I promise.”
“How can you be so sure?”
Good question. I don't know how I know it'll all work out, but I know Rahima will be with her daddy soon. Rahima's presence has changed Rah and that alone is worth fighting for her to be with him on a more regular basis.
As I watch the running water merge with the golden, fragrant liquid and create soft clouds of bubbles in the tub, I realize how the smallest addition can completely change the scenery. Before I lit the candle and poured Mama's bubble bath, creating a soothing experience, this bathroom was dull and dingy. I believe the same thing can happen with Rah's situation. It's ugly now, but with the right tools, the situation can completely transform for the better.
“I have faith, Rah. Life can't be shitty always. There has to be light at the end of the tunnel. Otherwise, why are we here?”
“You got all of that from me asking what to do about Sandy?” he says.
I can hear Rah smiling through the phone. I'd rather hear that than hear him crying any day.
“Yes and no. Let's just say life's simpler than you think.” I turn the water off and walk back into the bedroom to return the bottle to its place and retrieve my bath towel, wash cloth, and robe hanging on the back of the door. “Now I hate to rush you off of the phone, but my bath awaits.”
“Okay, I feel you. I'm glad you have enough faith for both of us. Sometimes I don't know,” he says, taking a deep breath like my grandfather does when he talks about his days in the war.
“What don't you know?”
“I don't know what I'd do without you here to balance me. You make everything seem possible. When you were gone, everything was at a standstill.”
I'm not used to Rah being so open with his feelings. I'm almost speechless, but then I remember who I'm talking to. I always have a response to my boy.
“As flattering as that is, I know your world doesn't revolve around little ole me.”
“I didn't say it did, smartass. But there is something about you that keeps it moving. You know what I mean?”
I know exactly what he means. My world got dark without Rah in it. I felt like I was simply going through the motions, not really awake. Now, my whole life has changed in a matter of months and it's largely because I have Rah back in my life as a friend—and as more than that.
“Yeah, I feel you, baby,” I say, running my fingers through the warm water. “Now let me go, Rah. My water's getting cold.”
“Alright. And Jayd, I want you to know I was lost when you stopped talking to me, girl. I felt like I was living in a dream world without you and Rahima. And now that I've got both of you back in my life, I'm never letting go of either one of my girls again. I guess what I'm trying to say is, thank you for being here.”
“Where else would I be?” It's strange how fate has a way of bringing you to a point in time no matter how many times you may have tried to avoid it.
“Well, I can think of at least one other place.”
At the allusion to Jeremy, my phone beeps, indicating a call from the boy himself. I'm not taking Jeremy's call and I'm ending this one with Rah.
“Don't worry about all that,” I say, locking the bathroom door and turning out the dim light above the medicine cabinet. It's time for me to chill and wash the drama of the day off. I don't want it to weigh me down, which is also what Rah needs to do. “You know, you should come by the shop and get your head done. You need a cleansing.”
“You do my hair just fine.”
“Yeah, but Netta can clear it. I don't want you to be distracted by things you can't control, like who I kick it with. All of your ashe needs to be focused on Rahima's best interests.”
“You sound just like your grandmother, you know that?”
“Now that's the sweetest thing you've said to me all day. Night night, Rah.”
“Night night, queen.”
 
After I hung up with Rah, I finally got to take my hot bath. After which I promptly devoured my chicken, biscuits and side orders before heading to the dining room to focus on my schoolwork. I got some studying done for government class and put my English portfolio in order in preparation for our AP meetings on Wednesday. Now that I've finished my schoolwork for the evening, I can finally get into bed. I pack up my backpack and set it on the floor next to the table.
The small charm bag Mama gave me for my first day of school is still hanging on the side of my bag, along with the keychain picture of me and my crew from the Masquerade Ball. I hope we can get it together before this picture is irrelevant. Feeling drained, I return to the bedroom I share with Mama, and lay my head back on my pillow, pull my covers over my body, and melt into my bed, ready for a good night's sleep. Right before I drift off completely, my phone rings, making me jump. Why is my father calling so late and interrupting my flow?
“Hey, Daddy,” I say, answering the phone on the first ring. I know I forgot to call him and set up the dates for my driving lessons and I don't want him to think I've lost interest.
“Hey, girl. You still too busy to call your old man, I see,” he says, not letting me off the hook for a minute. “But I still managed to book your lessons for this week. Is that good for you, Miss Jackson?”
“Yes, Mr. Jackson. I appreciate it greatly.” Sometimes I can joke with my daddy, but unfortunately our relationship is full of the tension that predates my existence on earth. With him, my guard is always up.
“So, they'll pick you up after school every day this coming week. Your lessons are for an hour a day. I told them to meet you at the front office. If you want to change, just give them a call. You ready to write down the information?”
“I'm actually sleeping now. Can you call back and leave it on my voice mail please?” I sweetly request, but I know that pissed him off. He says I'm too spoiled by my grandmother as it is and that I remind him too much of my mother. No wonder I'm not nicer to him.
“Jayd, I'm doing all of this for you and you can't even get up to write the information down? Boy, I tell you,” he says.
Mama's still not home from the shelter and it's almost eleven. I think Bryan's picking her up after work. Hopefully, I'll be asleep by the time they get in.
“Okay, Daddy, I'm up,” I say, searching for my backpack at the foot of my bed, only to find I've left it in the dining room. I get up and turn the light switch on the wall and open the door, feeling the warm blast from the heater on the floor. I walk through the living room to quickly retrieve my bag and get back into Mama's room and take out the small datebook in my backpack to take down the information. I'm only wearing my nightshirt and scarf—no robe or slippers on my feet. If Mama's saw me outside of my bed like this, she'd have a conniption.
“Okay, the name of the school is Better by the Beach Driver's Training. The name of your instructor is Tina and she'll be there tomorrow at three.” I write it all down.
“Thank you, Daddy. Tell Faye I said hi.” If it weren't for my stepmother, we probably wouldn't talk as much as we do, even if it is limited. She's pretty cool most of the time. But, like everyone, she has her good days and her bad ones.
“Will do. And I'll see you for the family Christmas dinner. Don't forget and let me know in advance if you need a ride,” he says.
He knows I'm going to need one unless Rah can take me. But I'll wait and see how the week unfolds. “Okay, Daddy. See you then.” I hang up the phone and put it down on the dining room table.
I put up the datebook and set my backpack down on the dining room chair, eyeing the five books and several single-subject notebooks inside. I have a ton of work to do before the holiday's up. Now maybe I can get some rest. It's been a long, emotional day and I have a long, emotional week ahead of me. I know Laura's going to try her best to take my role from me. And with Mrs. Bennett by her side she can probably get away with it, or so she thinks.
I'm going to work on polishing my paper on Queen Califia and study my spirit lessons at the same time. I know my ancestors had way more drama to get through than this. If anything can help me see my path clearly, it'll be my spirit lessons or the contents of the spirit book at home. I'll take a look at my mom's notebook tomorrow and then study in the spirit room when I get home tomorrow. Until then, sleep will have to be my savior.

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