Hunting Lust (Orion the Hunter Part Three) (10 page)

“You hate it when I mention who?”  I was totally confused.

“Him,” he spat.  “Your ex.”

What on fucking earth is he fucking talking about? 
“Lucas, I don’t have an ex.  I’ve never even had a boyfriend … ever.”

He looked totally bewildered.  “You must have done.  You said you loved him.”  The volume of his voice had begun to rise.

I slid off his lap and turned to face him.  I towered over him, standing with my hands on my hips.  “I said I haven’t.  I’m not a liar, Lucas.”  I could feel the anger building inside me.

He looked up, his eyes pitch dark and stormy.  “Then who the fucking hell used to call you Isobella?” he demanded.

I felt like I’d been kicked in the gut and my breath rushed out of me.  I doubled over, feeling dizzy and nauseous.   I could hear him saying my name but nothing else.  I just wanted him away from me.

“Get out,” I muttered.

Then he was there, in front of me.  “Get out, get out you stupid bastard!” I screamed.

The stubborn asshole wouldn’t leave me.  He tried reaching out for me but I slapped his hands away and kept shouting for him to get out.   Then Angel was there, yelling at him to get out of my room.

I sank to the floor, feeling like I’d been stabbed through the heart.  I sobbed quietly until I heard my bedroom door open and close. 
Thank fuck for Angel.  She’ll make everything alright.

But it wasn’t Angel.  It was him.  I opened my mouth to scream at him to get out but he bent down, picked me up, although I resisted and held me in his arms.  I beat my hands against his chest and ordered him to put me down.  He didn’t react at all.

Eventually, I tried to stifle my sobs and I blinked away my tears to look at his face. 
Why was he doing this to me?  And where was Angel?

I was shocked when I saw his face.  It was ashen and his eyes looked flat, no storm or sparkle.  “I’m so sorry, Issy.  You must think I’m a complete bastard.  Angel told me about your dad  ... and your mom.  I didn’t know, Issy.  I’m so sorry.  I wish you’d told me.  I would never have upset you if I’d known.  Please believe me.”

I was in no mood for lame excuses or apologies.  “Lucas, I can’t do this.  Please put me down and just go.”

His eyes swept over mine, silently pleading with me to reconsider.  “I don’t want to ever let you go, Issy,” he whispered.  “Tell me what to do to make it better and I’ll do it.”

I was desperately trying to keep the sobs at bay.  “Just leave,” I croaked.

He looked devastated but he carried me to my bed and lay me down.  I instantly turned away from him and curled into the foetal position.  That felt better until I felt the mattress dip as he sat next to me. 

“For fuck’s sake, Lucas.  Can’t you think of someone else’s needs instead of just your own for a change?  I. Don’t. Want. You. Anywhere. Near. Me.  Do you understand? Now please, fuck off.”   Even I was shocked by the venom in my voice.

I felt the mattress move and then heard the door close. 
Thank god for that!
I gave in to the tidal wave of tears that I didn’t want him to see me shed. 

What felt like hours later, but was probably only minutes, Angel crept into my room and spooned behind me.  She held me tight and stroked my hair patiently as my sobs subsided.

“Hey,” she whispered.  “It’s okay, sweetheart.  I’ve told Lucas all about your parents.  He had no idea, did he?  He feels like a complete bastard.  Why didn’t you tell him?”

I froze and anxiety caused my stomach to clench. 
“Why the fuck would I tell him?  And what exactly have you told him?”  I held my breath, silently praying that she hadn’t told him everything.

I heard her take a deep breath and let it out slowly before continuing.  “He told me that he’d maybe overreacted when you told him that only one man had called you Isobella.  He said it wasn’t the first time you’d hinted at having feelings for someone. You’d also mentioned to him days ago that you’d only loved one man and that you’d never love another.  He thought you meant a boyfriend and I’m pretty sure he thought that’s why you won’t get involved with anyone else.  He was jealous, Issy, so at first, I told him that you meant your dad, just to make him realise that he didn’t need to be jealous.  That there is no other man in your life.”

I processed this information, desperately trying to fight the urge to tell her to butt out.  This was my past.  My dirty laundry.  Then my brain recalled what she’d said.  “At first?  So what else did you tell him?”  I was starting to feel nauseous. 
Surely she wouldn’t have told him everything.
  My head began to throb.

“Well, obviously he was struggling to understand why you’d get so upset over an innocent misunderstanding.”  I could tell from her tone that she was uncomfortable with this conversation.  I couldn’t understand why she appeared to be on his side.  She was
my
friend … she was supposed to have
my
back!

I spoke through gritted teeth. “Angel, if he didn’t have such jealous and controlling tendencies, I wouldn’t have been upset.  So, what exactly did you tell him?”

“I only told him that your parents were killed when you were very young,” she said quietly.

“Oh, okay.  Did he ask any more questions?” 

“No, he didn’t.  Issy, both his parents are dead too and he has no family at all.  He might understand more than you think.  It might help to explain why he behaves the way he does – he’s been on his own for a long time.  Just like you – except you have me.”  I knew she was smiling, her discomfort seemingly gone.

He’d never said … but I’d never asked either. 

“Yeah, but I don’t think the world revolves around me, that I can do exactly what I please.  I don’t have jealous outbursts and mood swings and other controlling tendencies.” 
Oh, but I like some of those controlling tendencies!

I felt her stiffen and her hand stilled on my head.  She spoke hesitantly.  “No … but you don’t let people get close to you.   You fear loving someone in case you get hurt, in case they leave you.  Issy, I know how fortunate I am to still have my parents in my life and I can’t imagine what it must have been like to be you.  At such a young age, to have your parents disappear from your life, to have your whole young life turned upside down and don’t even get me started on that hellish troll of an aunt that you had to endure … how could that not affect you?”

I thought about what she said for a little while.  I knew it could make sense but I was so young, just a baby really – who was to say how it affected my adult life?  Then I thought about Lucas. 
Was he affected by the loss of his parents?
 
Could that be the reason that he was so egocentric? Was he just a child when he lost them, as I was when I lost mine?

I turned to face her, taking in her worried expression.  “Angel, did he say how and when they’d died?”

She shook her head.  “No.  He obviously didn’t want to talk about it.  It must be very painful for him.  I got the feeling that he was only a child too.  He looked crushed when he realised what he’d done to you.”

I felt my chest tighten as I began to wonder whether I’d misjudged him.  “Really? Where is he now?  Has he gone?”

Her large pale blue eyes looked sad and I’m sure she knew what I was thinking.  I loved her for allowing me to think things through and not push her opinion on me.  She took my hands in hers.  “Yes.  I told him that I would come and explain.  He said to tell you he is sorry.  I told him that you’d probably need some wine and your iPod and some alone time before you felt better.  He obviously didn’t understand but he accepted it and left.”

I smiled and my heart swelled.  I counted my blessings every day for having such a fantastic friend.  “Oh, you know me so well.  Actually, I don’t want to be alone – I think your wise words have helped me realise that things weren’t as I’d thought.  Are the boys still here?”

“Yes.  They’re worried about you so they’re hanging on to see how you are.  Come on out; they’ll soon take your mind off things.  The reason that they wanted Lucas to come back here after their rehearsal is that they have some amazing news!”  She stood, our hands still entwined, and pulled me to my feet.  I disentangled our fingers and threw my arms around her. 

“Whatever would I do without you?  I know how lucky I am that our paths crossed.  Thank you … for everything,” I whispered.

“Ah, you retaardvark! I would put some clothes on first though,” she snickered.  I burst out laughing at her reference to one of our old college insults. I threw on some sweatpants and a cami and we went to join the band.

Angel hadn’t been wrong when she said they had amazing news.  Apparently, Lucas had arranged for them to play at a festival in just two weeks’ time and that this could help to gain them a place on a tour as a support act, if they were well received.

I declared that a celebration was in order and asked for a glass of wine.  Everyone else already had a drink in their hand.  Chad obligingly poured me a glass but apologized that it wasn’t the one that Angel had requested. 

“Too fucking right,” said Travis, sarcastically.  “We’re not all millionaires like your fuck buddy!”

I flipped him off and informed him that I didn’t have a fuck buddy. 
What would you call him then? 
I pushed the thought aside and changed the subject.

“What do you mean – ‘too fucking right’?  Was it expensive then?”  I asked.

“Just a little,” said Chad.  This was met with a guffaw from Travis and Ethan; even Scott was chuckling.

“It’s a bargain at only $250 a bottle,” announced Travis, with a straight face.

“It’s what?” My eyes were like saucers.

“I know.  And there we were, knocking it back like water,” giggled Angel.  “Oh my god!”

Angel and I collapsed in a fit of giggles, much to the annoyance of the guys. 

Ethan checked his watch and stood.  “Well, amusing and entertaining as this has been.  I have a date.  And if I want to get laid tonight, I’d better get going.”

A look of almost pure panic came over Travis’ face.  “Hey man, I thought we were going to go hunting pussy tonight?  If you’ve got one lined up, what the fuck do I do?”

Ethan shrugged carelessly.  “Not my problem, Trav.”

“It fucking well will be if I can’t get none – I’ll make you fucking share,” sulked Travis, getting to his feet.  “And I ain’t joking.”

They began to argue but I tuned them out.  I found it hard to believe that Mother Nature had given these two guys such fantastic bodies and faces but no conscience when it came to women.  I know I didn’t do relationships either but I was upfront about it.  I never slept with a guy unless he understood that. 

Ethan in particular was a total bastard when it came to getting a woman into bed.   He acted as though he was looking for a full time commitment but the next morning, he didn’t want to know.  It was the only reason that I didn’t sleep with him when we met.  His proclamations of long term interest turned me off, instantly.  My initial reaction to him had been purely sexual.  I loved his badass black leather and tattoos rock star look.  His brown hair was styled to perfection, like Lucas’ only shorter.  He had eyes the color of Jack Daniels that said ‘fuck me right here, right now’ rather than ‘come to bed’.  That, together with his incredible voice that felt like he was making love to your ears, gave him a cockiness that added to the package.  He never went home alone, unless it was by choice.

My attention was drawn to Travis, who was now threatening to do shocking things to Ethan’s date if he didn’t agree to call her and get her to bring a friend along for him. Nothing had changed since high school, I thought.  Travis had been the epitome of the stereotypical football jock, expecting instant favor because of his place on the team and his legendary football skills.  He also expected the girls to put out for their exalted quarterback, and, to be fair, they usually did.