How You Tempt Me (8 page)

I blink up at him. “Julia? She...”

Julian laughs, his face lighting up. “Oh, Julia
is my sister. My kid sister, though she acts like she's my mother.
She's just gone off on a mission. Doctors without borders. She's
amazing. I'm really so proud of her. I just wish I'm a better
brother to her, instead of...”

“
I'm sure she just wants you to be happy.”
I squeeze his hand. “And wow, two doctors in the family. Your
parents must be real proud.”

“
Yeah. They were.”

I note the past tense, but I don't comment on it. I can
see the deep hurt etched on his face.

Finally, I swallow and ask tentatively, “What
happened five years ago? Would you like to talk...?”

“
I lost my wife and my unborn child five and a
half years ago,” he answers without emotion. “We were
driving home from a dinner, when a drunk driver ploughed into the
passenger side. They died on the spot.”

“
I am so sorry,” I whisper.

He shakes his head. “It happened a long time
ago.”

I look down, unsure of what to say. Losing a partner, a
spouse through death is completely different from being rid of them
through a divorce or break-up. My divorce had been shocking and
painful, but when it was over, I'd felt a rush of relief and
gratitude. I was glad and grateful that I had gotten out relatively
unscathed, broke but not broken. And I can honestly say that I don't
miss that cheating piece of shit at all. But in Julian's case...

“
All these years,” Julian begins softly,
breaking into my thoughts. “I've never felt like I wanted
anyone else. There's just no interest, no attraction. Julia was
beginning to worry for me. Heck, I think even I was beginning to
worry for me. I just never wanted anyone, until I saw you. I'm
just...I am really glad that you came, Sophia.” His voice
drops to a whisper. “You don't know how much...”

“
Julian, I...”

He silences me with a light kiss at the very corner of
my lips. “I am very attracted to you, Sophia. And I think now
you know how much,” he laughs lightly, and this time I see hope
rather than sorrow in his eyes. “The moment I saw you, I just
wanted to get to know you better. The moment I saw you at the gate,
I wanted to rush out and talk to you, to try to stop you from
leaving. I wasn't even sure what I'd have said, ask you to stay for
supper? I really don't know. I just wanted to hear your voice, and
have you near. I...I've never felt this way about anyone, any woman,
since...”

“
Then why won't you...” I blurt out.

Julian tilts my face up with a finger under my chin.
“Sophia,” he whispers. “I want you. I want you a
lot, but...I cannot have you. Not before the test is finished. I
want to hold you, touch you, have you...but it will interfere with
your responses to the machine. So...I can't...but God knows how much
I want to!”

He pulls me close and I lean my cheek against his bare
chest, listening to the rhythmic beat of his heart.

Julian's breathing quickens as his hand moves down my
waist to my hips and he realizes that I am not wearing anything under
that baggy t-shirt. He strokes my curves through the thin fabric and
I raise one leg to his hips, spreading my legs for him. He puts a
hand under my knee to lift my leg up higher to his waist. “Sophia,”
he says hoarsely. “You are just too perfect. Your whole
body...you are driving me insane, you know that? I want you, so
much.”

I press my lips to his neck. “I want you too,
Julian,” I whisper. “Right now.”

He groans and pushes me against the wall. “Sophia,
you are making it so hard...” His hand slips under my t-shirt
and shoves the t-shirt up over my breasts. He lowers his head and I
gasp, anticipating his mouth on my breast and his tongue over my
erect nipple. Instead, I feel him breathe heavily over my bare skin,
his lips barely skimming across my aching breasts. I push forward,
wanting him to take me full into his mouth and feel his tongue and
teeth on me.

“
Sophia, darling...” He crushes me to him,
my hard nipples stabbing into his chest. He holds me flush against
him, and I close my eyes at the heat of his bare skin against mine.
I move my hand down to his towel, but he stops me, shaking his head.
“We have to stop now, before we...” He swallows hard,
his voice ragged.

“
Screw the machine, Julian,” I breathe
against his neck. “I want you.”

I can feel his lips curve upwards against my temple.
“Can't. Screw the machine that is. It's not meant to do
that.”

I narrow my eyes at him, trying to see if he is joking.
“But it is a sex machine, right?” I say at last. “So
why can't it...”

“
The machine...it is supposed to stimulate your
senses, your nerves, every inch of your skin, explore your body. It
is supposed to bring you to orgasm, but through a more subtle teasing
and caressing. Pushing, rubbing, thrusting...all these are known
methods and actions in stimulating the sexual organs. But they can
overstimulate the organs and senses, and cause pain and exhaustion.
But there are other ways, other methods of pleasuring the body. The
whole body should be awakened and aroused. There is still a lot to
be explored and studied, and I know it's a lot to ask, but I hope
you'll trust me...”

I take a shuddering breath. “You won't hurt me,
will you, Julian?”

“
Sophia...I won't.” He sounds pained. “I
won't ever hurt you. How could I? When all I want to do is love you
and make love to you...”

I close my eyes and rest my head on his shoulder. Can I
learn to trust again? Yet by signing the contract and putting myself
in his hands, in his house, I have implicitly given him my trust.
But I am afraid. I am afraid that I might begin to feel something
more, something more than just desire for Julian. Am I ready to open
my heart to him? By opening up to me tonight, he has given me a
piece of his heart to hold, a precious, beautiful thing.

We wrap our arms very tenderly, tentatively and
protectively around each other, knowing that we are each holding
something so precious and fragile in our arms. I have not allowed
myself to come this close to anyone in a long time. Neither has
Julian, I suspect.

The night quietly slips away and dawn breaks over
Julian's huge mansion. This is where I will stay for the next three
weeks, in this house with this man and his sex machine. I am not
sure what to expect, of this man, of myself.

I can feel myself starting to shiver, but not from cold.
Quickly I pull away and smile up at him to break the tension. “I
wonder what else your machine can do, Dr. James,” I say,
flashing a mischievous but shaky grin. “I wonder how much more
I can take.”

To my surprise, Julian gives me a big hug. “We'll
see. I guess you will find that out very soon.”

I bury my face in his shoulder to hide my blush. If
this first exploratory orgasm is anything to go by, I think that the
pleasure is going to be even deeper and more intense and mind-blowing
than anything I have ever experienced. And that—can only be a
good thing.

End of Book 1