Homecoming Day (14 page)

T
HERE WAS A QUIET, NEW
rhythm to Seth's life that revolved around work and Laura.

In the weeks following Christmas, he spent most of his nonworking waking hours at her house. They didn't talk about their growing physical attraction, but they continued flirting with it. Long, hot kisses good-night. And casual touches that were anything but.

They both knew they were playing with fire.

It was easier when JT was there. She served as a buffer. Seth would entertain Jamie which meant JT and Laura had uninterrupted time together. He loved watching the two of them. Laura helped JT with her reading. She was patient, even when JT became frustrated.

He was amazed by the progress the girl was making. But he and Laura…there was no progress. There was no regression. There was no talking about what was happening between them. They were standing in the midst of a quagmire—in danger of losing their footing at any moment. When he wasn't with her, he worried that they were going to make some false step. And when he was with her, all he could think about was her.

Today, JT barreled in and threw her book bag on the table with a loud thud.

“JT?” Laura asked.

“Something wrong?” He juggled Jamie on his shoulder, waiting for a burp.

“You remember that English test on
Pride and Prejudice
?” JT slumped into one of the chairs.

“Yes,” Laura said slowly.

“Well, I read that book with you, and even watched that long PBS miniseries, and the new movie, too. I was ready for the test. Knew all the vocab. I should have done good on it.”

“Oh, JT…” Laura started as Seth said, “Hey, it's okay.”

“No, it's not okay, because I didn't do good, I rocked it.” She pulled the test from her backpack, jumped from the chair and held it up. “I mean, the brainiacs in our class might think a B-isn't that impressive, but, Ms. Watson, I don't think I ever got a B anything in an English class, ever. Not even once.”

She tossed the test on the table and hugged Laura, then turned and hugged Seth, too, squeezing Jamie in between them.

JT picked up the test and handed it to Laura. “I think Ms. Lutz must have shit a brick when she had to give me something higher than a D.”

Laura studied it. “JT, that's not fair. No teacher likes seeing students struggle.”

“No good teacher like you. But Mrs. Lutz is old and tired. She hates teaching now. And she really hates teaching me.”

“JT…” Laura obviously didn't know what to say.

Seth supplied, “Well, the grade isn't about Mrs. Lutz, or even Ms. Watson. It's about you and how hard
you've been working.” Jamie finally burped, as if for emphasis.

“Yeah, but it's about you guys, too. You are the first grown-ups who ever really cared. And I know I'm a kid, but I'm old enough to know that's special.” She beamed at them, clearly grateful.

“So we should celebrate, if you want? Dinner? You'd have to call your mom and see if it's okay. Maybe she'd like to join us?” Seth offered. They'd invited JT's mom to other events, but she'd never accepted. She never even got out of the car when she picked JT up.

JT said she was pleased to have someone else looking after her, because it gave her mom more time with the new boyfriend.

“That'd be great. Let me call her. I don't think she'll come, but I'll ask.” JT whipped her cell phone from her pocket and dialed, then walked into the living room.

“That's nice of you, Seth.” Laura held out the test so he could see it as well.

“I should have asked if you minded taking Jamie out.” He took the test and studied it. “She did great. I think that after watching Colin Firth in the miniseries, I could probably have taken the test, too. And you don't know how unmanly that admission makes me feel.”

Laura laughed and kissed his cheek. “You, sir, are the epitome of manliness. I'm so proud of JT I could burst with it. As for checking, I don't mind taking Jamie out, but I could…” She hesitated, then quickly said, “I could call the Martins and see if they'd like to watch Jamie for a couple hours.”

Seth raised a brow.

Laura took a deep breath and nodded. “Mrs. Martin
nearly swooned with happiness when she watched him while I got my hair cut.”

“Are things still strained between you?”

“Yes, but they do love Jamie, and for his sake I try to make sure they see him a couple times a week.”

“How about you seeing them?” he asked.

“Of course, I see them. They come here. Or I see them when I drop him off in order to run an errand.”

“Laura, that's not what I meant. They're your family.”

She shook her head. “They were Jay's family and only tolerated me for his sake.”

“Even I don't think that's true, and I suspect, neither do you.”

“Seth, I don't want to fight, but seriously, of all the people who could give me family-relationship advice, you're not high on my list of counselors given your relationship with your parents. You've never explained why and—”

JT returned but seemed oblivious to the tension that twanged between Seth and Laura.

Seth should have known better than to bring up the Martins. He avoided mentioning them, she avoided mentioning his family. It worked that way.

JT looked upset. “Mom said she had other plans for dinner, not that that's a surprise. But she doesn't care if I go with you guys.”

Seth saw Laura's look of concern. “Well, good. We've got some serious celebrating to do. How about Laura calls the chief to see if we're taking Jamie or they are, and then we hit the road.”

“I'll go call now,” Laura said.

“Well done, My Lady.” Seth gave a deep, formal bow to JT, while he juggled the baby.

JT giggled exactly like a teenage girl. “Well, Sir Seth, may I take Sir Jamie for a bit? Yesterday he was showing me his new trick.”

“New trick? What is this new trick I know nothing about?” He handed the baby over to her.

“Watch.” JT sat on the floor next to the baby play mat Jamie had got for Christmas.

She positioned him directly underneath the stuffed zebra. Jamie reached for it, and batted at it with his hand.

“He likes the zebra the best, but he's reaching for all the toys now, trying to grab them.”

“Wow, should he be able to do that already?” Seth asked.

“I don't know,” JT said. “But he's a smart boy.”

“Smart? I'm going to go with he's a prodigy.” Seth leaned down to the baby. “Look at you, big man.”

“Sir Big Man, remember,” JT teased.

“Sir Big Man.” Seth held the baby up so they were eye-to-eye. “Sir Big Man's quite the prodigy.”

The baby giggled.

“Hey, he likes it,” Seth said.

JT took him and said, “Sir Big Man,” much to Jamie's giggly delight.

“Yep, he's a Sir Big Man, toy-grabbing prodigy.”

For the rest of the evening, Laura felt out of sorts, ever since she stood in the doorway and watched Seth and JT play with Jamie. Seth was joking and kidding around with both kids, and her heart had melted.

She felt whole. How could she feel so happy and content when Jay was dead?

She put it in the most brutal terms. No easy euphemisms. He hadn't passed. He wasn't gone. He hadn't moved on to a better place. He was dead, as hard and finite as that.

Jay—the man she loved—was gone, and not only was she happy, she was attracted to another man. She and Seth had avoided any talk of that attraction, but it was there. It was palpable whenever she was with him.

And it was growing.

Laura was more confused than she'd been in her whole life. Every emotion toyed with the next until she didn't know what she felt. The only respite she had was when Seth held her or kissed her. The most casual touch was enough.

But those moments always ended, and she was thrown back into the tumult.

She thought she had successfully hidden her feelings during dinner, and when they picked up the baby at the Martins, but Seth kept shooting her looks that told her she wasn't managing as well as she hoped.

 

“H
EY, PENNY FOR YOUR THOUGHTS
?” Seth asked Laura, at her house later that evening. Laura had seemed distracted all night, and he wasn't sure why. He knew she was happy on JT's behalf, but somehow she didn't seem quite happy enough. Something was bothering her.

“I'm not sure about whether to go back to school right after Valentine's Day, or wait until the fall. I'm torn.”

He came over to the couch, sat next to her and put his arm around her. “He'll be fine no matter what you decide. He's loved. Babies sense that.”

“I know he will, but I'm not sure I will. I like surety. I like knowing where I stand. I don't like feeling undecided. One day I'm sure I want to go back in a month, and the next day Jamie does something amazing and I know waiting until next school year is the best decision.”

Seth leaned down and kissed her forehead. “It will all be okay.”

He wished he had some answer for her. Some wise words to make everything better, but he didn't.

“How can being torn in two be okay?” Laura asked.

Suddenly, Seth wondered if they were talking about more than Laura going back to school. “Laura, I—”

She shook her head. “Talk to me about work. About anything. Something to distract me.”

He reached out and brushed a strand of her blond hair behind her ear. It was silky. He loved the way it felt, which distracted him from distracting her. He searched for something. “Remember those kids I took home a while back? The exchange student and graffiti kids?”

She nodded and that strand of blond hair slid back across her cheek. “How could I forget? JT was already in trouble for skipping school and lying to you. She's come a long way since.”

He resisted the urge to retuck it. “I checked in on Joel, the kid who was in love.”

“His mom was at her wit's end, right?”

“Right. Anyway, I got him involved with the Police Cadets at the station, and his mom is thrilled with the change in him. She got him a Skype account and he talks to Lisa after school most nights.”

“So, you're a matchmaker? You kept Romeo and Juliet from being totally pulled apart.”

“Technology did that. I have kept an eye on him, and his mom says things have been much better at home. That's one of my favorite parts of the job—when I feel I've made a difference.”

“You're a Keller, through and through, Seth.” She nodded, as if agreeing with herself, and her hair bob-bled about, brushing against her cheek.

Seth couldn't resist the temptation and pushed it back behind her ear again. “What do you mean?”

“The entire Keller family seems to go out of their way to help other people. It started with your parents adopting six kids—kids who've carried on their legacy. You're a cop. Dom's a physical therapist. Your sister's a nurse. Zac runs the grocery store, but he's found a way to turn that into a community asset by hiring kids in trouble, or special people. Your whole family has turned giving into an art form. That's a rare gift. I should know, since I've only recently been Kellerized.”

His hand stilled, resting on her shoulder. “Kellerized?”

“Eli used that phrase when she was here with Tucker. I like it. I don't think I've thanked you enough for taking me and Jamie under your wing. I…” Laura let the sentence trail off and simply leaned toward him and kissed him, full on the lips. No hesitation. No holding back.

Seth wanted her. He'd wanted her for a long time, but he wasn't sure this was the time. Since that first kiss when they'd clarified their relationship as friends, they'd toyed with it being something more. But despite their joking about no huge exterior obstacles, there was something worse than pairing a cop with an international art thief, or a vegan and carnivore.

There was baggage. They both had things in the past that held them back from the future.

He knew it was time to let go of Allie, to move on. But he hadn't quite managed it yet, and he knew Laura was still mourning Jay. Getting any more involved with each other could lead to pain for both of them.

He tried to hold on to those thoughts—on to the reasons why he and Laura shouldn't let this go any further than they already had, but she toyed with the buttons on his shirt and he forgot those very sensible reasons why they shouldn't do what he suspected they might do.

He stilled her hand by placing his over it and broke off the kiss. “Laura, I don't think you want to do this.”

“No, what I don't want is to think. To weigh or analyze this. I don't want to feel guilty about being alive, about being happy. All I do know is that I want you. I've wanted you for a while now.” She paused and added, “Unless you don't want me.”

“No, I guarantee that's not the issue.” Wanting Laura. That feeling had grown exponentially. Every moment he spent with her. Every touch. Every kiss. The wanting kept growing until he hardly knew how to contain it.

But she deserved more than just his desire, and he
wasn't sure he could give her that. He liked her. Loved her as a friend even. But more?

He wasn't sure. “Laura, we need to stop and think this through. I don't want you to wake up tomorrow and regret this.”

“I won't,” she said with a surety he doubted.

“But…”

She stood, took his hand and pulled him to his feet. “Jamie's down until one or so. We have time and I want you. This doesn't have to be more than that. Simply two friends wanting each other. Friends with benefits.”

“Laura.”

“If you don't want—” she started.

Seth couldn't lie. “I do want. I want a lot. But I don't know if that's enough.”

“For tonight, it is.” She sounded so sure. She led him to her room and he followed.