Read Hold Me Online

Authors: Lucianne Rivers

Tags: #romantic suspense, #romantic thriller, #romance, #contemporary romance, #lucianne rivers, #lucy river, #hold me, #movie star, #celebrity, #guatamala, #mexico, #travel, #novella

Hold Me (7 page)

BOOK: Hold Me
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She shuddered.

“Relax,” he ordered.

She gripped his shoulders, then released them and cupped her breasts.

She was wet beneath his kiss, and tasted so damn perfect, he wanted more. Flicking her clit with the tip of his tongue, he urged her toward climax. She was completely at his mercy.

“Cady,” she screamed, bucking, driving his tongue inside again.

He obliged, lapping up her juice, back and forth, back and forth, letting her ride his face to completion.

She arched into a prolonged and ecstatic climax. Her face creased with pleasure and wetness washed over his mouth. “Oh. My. God.”

After several moments of stillness, she sagged then moved back down over him, lengthening her legs against his, resting her face on his chest. She laughed, and it sounded tremulous.

“Cady, Cady.” She shook her head, still smiling.

He stroked her hair and his chest rumbled with corresponding laughter.

“Jane, Jane,” he replied. “You make me want to cry out like Tarzan.”

She raised her head. “Excuse me, but I think you already did. You know, during your, um, climax?”

Cady tipped up her chin so he could see into her eyes. He brushed her cheek with the pad of his thumb, traced the bone, then kissed her forehead before pulling her back to his chest.

“I hope tomorrow never comes,” she murmured before falling asleep.


Cady saw the dawn break through tired eyes. He’d slept fitfully, instead watching Jane in repose. Inspiration flowed through him like a flash flood. He hated to leave the warmth of her body next to his but he needed to find his guitar. After slipping out of the bed, he headed to his small living room.

His acoustic guitar stood on its stand by the shaded window. He lifted it and placed it on his lap with a sure but gentle grasp. Touching it reminded him of how he loved to touch Jane. Strumming, he played a major cord, then a minor one, and then picked out a new melody inspired by the woman in his bed—a sweet tune of longing, pain and loss.

It was all Jane.

Damn. He wasn’t ready to leave the carefully hidden life he’d put together. So what if his newfound muse lived thousands of miles away? He’d been alone for years; he could do it again.

“That’s beautiful.”

Jane stood at the door, wearing one of his shirts. Music swelled in his brain, and his fingers obliged by playing the notes.
Goodbye Jane...
the lyrics came to him, but he refrained from singing aloud.
The answer to all my pain...
Corny, but true. As if realizing he needed to be alone, she smiled and backed away, leaving him to his guitar.


Cady had his doubts about Zach Caldwell. Jane and her so-called father walked side-by-side around his compound while Cady sat on the porch. Zach had a rifle slung over one shoulder, for starters. Ostensibly what he’d used to kill the rabbit dangling from his fingers. Jane had paused when she’d seen the gun, but she’d grown up on a ranch so Cady hadn’t been surprised by her apparent ease around a man carrying a rifle.

Cady knew how to shoot, had learned for one or two of his movies. Still, the rifle made him nervous. Caldwell made him nervous, and he couldn’t say why. Perhaps it was the way Zach glanced at Jane when she wasn’t looking, or the wattage of his smile. Years of experience with people on the take had given him a nose for anything remotely fake. What if Zach wasn’t who he seemed? But if that was the case, what could explain the story he’d told them about Iraq?

“Hey, Zach,” he called. “I need to use your john.”

Zach nodded.

The inside of Zach’s cabin stank of cigarette butts and stale beer. Not really needing to use the bathroom, Cady used the time to look around. A tiny bedroom revealed messy sheets—so much for military precision—and a cell phone charging on the bedside table. He heard footsteps approaching before he could investigate further.

Jane and Zach found him washing his hands in the tiny bathroom, door ajar.

Jane looked overjoyed. “Dad says he’s coming back with me.”

He mustered a smile. “That’s great, babe.” He came out and gave her a hug.

“So, Zach, I’ll book a flight for you if you give me your passport number.”

Half-expecting a suspicious response, Cady was taken aback when Zach nodded. After a quick rummage in the bedroom, Zach presented a U.S. passport to him. Needing to see the evidence, he flipped it open. It read
Zach T. Caldwell
in black and white. He frowned.

Okay, so maybe the guy really was Jane’s father.

“Do you mind if I tag along? I have some business to take care of back in the U.S.” Cady had spoken the words without thinking.

Jane looked as shocked as he felt. Hope dawned on her face and he felt like kicking himself. Mistrust made him want to protect her. It wasn’t that he couldn’t face saying goodbye to Jane.

“Let me grab my bag and we can leave,” Zach said.

“Is there any way we can avoid that nightmare journey back into Mexico?” Jane asked.

“There are international flights from Mundo Maya Airport outside of Flores,” Cady said, knowing they cost a fortune.

Jane’s face lit up.

Well, he could put his untouched millions to good use, finally.

Taking a smartphone out of his pocket, he found the number for the airstrip and dialed.

Jane eyed his cell, which he hadn’t mentioned he owned.

“You can use this after I’m done to call your sisters,” he said.

“Thanks,” she said, raising an eyebrow. “

He tugged a strand of her hair as he waited for a customer-service agent. “You assumed I didn’t have a phone, and at the time I still thought you were going to share my whereabouts with your media buddies.”

She shook her head, her face a mock grimace, then smiled.

The next bus to Flores left in an hour. They’d have just enough time to get back to his place and pick up some traveling items.

Cady pondered what he had done. This was it. He was going home. First time in years. Fear of his addiction fought with his resolve. What if he reverted to his old ways? In
Narcotics Anonymous
, he’d been advised to break with anyone or anything associated with his addictive past. But most of his friends from the Eighties were either dead or settled into family life and spread across the world. He faced little risk of meeting them in Albuquerque. New Mexico was far enough away from his old haunts in Los Angeles.

Cady called a local cab to get them to the only flight to the States that entire week. They cleared Guatemalan customs, and Zach trundled off to buy snacks, leaving them alone. Jane looked nervous as hell.

“What is it?” he asked.

“I couldn’t reach either of my sisters.”

“Is that unusual?”

“For Allison, anyway. She’s always home, or manning her cell phone in case a guest is trying to reach her.”

The boarding call for their flight squawked from the loudspeaker. Jane waved at Zach across the concourse.

After they boarded the plane, Cady watched Zach as he took in the luxury of the first-class accommodations he’d purchased—four seats in two rows, spanning the entire second row of the plane with the aisle in the middle. Cady wanted as much privacy as possible while travelling. Zach eased down next to the window and propped his bum leg across the adjacent seat. He claimed he wasn’t used to so much activity and his leg hurt.

By the time Cady and Jane settled in the row across the aisle, Zach had closed his eyes. Cady was tempted to draw the privacy curtains, titillating thoughts of the mile-high club flitting through his mind. He’d become a member long ago during his drug-hazed youth. But the sight of Zach Caldwell quelled his lusty urges.

The plane taxied and took off, and Cady forced himself to relax. Once they were airborne, an attendant offered him a drink and he declined, teeth clenching, the smell of alcohol wooing him. He hummed the new song he was writing and closed his eyes. When Jane turned down the drink offer, he snapped his eyes open. “You don’t have to do that.”

He had no doubt that she knew what he meant. “I want to.”

“No,” he said, ignoring the curious look of a passenger seated next to the aisle, one row back. “I don’t want you pitying me.”

Now she looked pissed. “Pitying you?”

“I’m an adult, Jane. I can handle temptation.”

Could he?

“Well forgive me for being considerate, Cady Hewes.”

The nosy passenger across the aisle looked surprised when she said Cady’s name. Crap. Spotted. He heard the rude
click
of a camera phone and frowned, raising a hand to his face in protection.

Jane shot the photographer a killer frown.

“Do you mind?” She rose to close the curtain around them, then turned back to him. “I’m sorry.”

“I knew what I was doing when I got on this plane,” he said, his tone gruff.

“And what were you doing?” Her eyes were a fishing expedition.

He shrugged. “Putting some faith in the person I’ve become?” Or something like that.

Understanding relaxed her expression. “And you want others to do the same.”

He nodded, touching her cheek with his fingertips, tracing the bone, enthralled.

“All right. I’ll have a case of champagne, please,” she called out in a mock order to the attendant who had moved out of earshot.

He laughed. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you. I know you were just being considerate.”

“That’s me. Miss Considerate.”

She leaned against the headrest, the tops of her breasts swelling above the neckline of her low-cut tee. He looked at them longingly and her smile grew sultry.

In his head, the song lyrics changed from
Goodbye
to
Hello Jane.

She leaned over and kissed him, lips tugging gently on his mouth.

He would never get enough of her. Thoughts of the future fizzed and popped through his pleasure-drugged gray matter. Just say, for example, he got back to the States and the media didn’t hound him? Say he found a place in New Mexico, near enough to where Jane worked? Say he asked her to marry him?

Jane whimpered into his deepening kiss and he broke away, struggling to breathe, to retain some semblance of intelligent thought.

“Later, I promise,” he murmured.

She smiled. He found himself staring at her bare ring finger as she peeked over at Zach, who still slept, then settled back into her seat. How on earth was she still single? “So, no jealous boyfriends waiting back home?”

“No boyfriends. Period.”

“Ever?”

“Just... not in quite some time.”

The United States loomed. There, he was only known as Cady Hewes, drug addict and loser. What a waste of space Cady Hewes had been, and now the world would have the chance to rub it in his face again.

Was Jane worth it?

Yes. Absolutely. No question.

Cady knew without a doubt. He loved her.

Chapter Seven

Heat rose in Jane’s cheeks as she mused over Cady’s words.

Later, I promise.

She couldn’t wait to hold him again, then show him off to the world. In the past, she’d tried to keep her relationships with men as private as possible. But with Cady, everything had changed. With Cady she was unafraid. The passion he’d elicited from her these past few days must have rewired her brain. She didn’t care who saw them together, and she loved that feeling.

Loved him.

Oh, wow.

She drew in a deep breath. Cady was coming home with her, but for how long? Would he take off the minute the wheels hit the runway in Albuquerque? Did he have somewhere to go? She knew nothing about his family life, or if he even had one.

Jane tried to picture him fitting into her future. She usually got up at four a.m. to get to the office in time for work. He was a former actor who played guitar as if he’d been born with it in hand. Couldn’t he work from anywhere? She sighed.
Face it Jane, he’ll go back to Guatemala within a month.

She berated herself for her pessimism. Shouldn’t she be thinking positively? She’d found her father, after all. She should be overjoyed. Except she wasn’t. There were still so many variables and more anxiety than ever. If he left them once, he could do it again. She had a feeling the second time would be even worse.

After Zack awoke from his nap, Jane joined him, listening to him tell war stories while Cady read a magazine, stretched across two seats. Her father asked about her career, about Ally and Margo, and spoke of his regret over leaving them.

Despite their conversation and their teary reunion in his home, Zach Caldwell did not evoke the feelings she thought he should. He didn’t seem like a dad—like
her
dad. Yet so much time had passed, so much pain endured. She supposed it would take a while for her to trust him again.

The airplane descended to the first of two pit stops on a twenty-four-hour journey.

“I’ve gotta go to the men’s room,” Zach said, limping slowly next to Jane and Cady. “Then I’m gonna hobble around some.” He patted the thigh of his bad leg and glanced at his watch.. “I woke up from my nap, but my leg’s still asleep. I’ll grab some grub and meet you at the gate in time for takeoff.”

A pang of hurt pierced Jane’s heart. They had just talked for hours, but now he seemed uncomfortable. Maybe the memories were too much for him to process all at once.

She was certain he had loved her mother. She remembered their affection, and the connection they’d shared. And he’d just discovered that his wife had died. He had no hope for reconciliation with her. No wonder he hadn’t mentioned her during their conversation.

Her father was probably nervous about facing Margo and Allison, too. Would they be as understanding as she? Ally might, but Margo? When Margo got angry, you stepped well out of her space. She had a fiery temper, and Jane wouldn’t be surprised if Margo gave Zach hell for leaving.

Jane left Zach to himself and she and Cady ate without him. Since they had an hour, she pulled Cady into a unisex bathroom and locked the door.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

She kissed him hard. “Something I’ve been aching to do for hours.”

He had her against the wall in seconds, his eyebrows arching as he encountered her underwear-free bottom beneath her skirt. He let out a hiss of air. “When did you take them off?”

She laughed. Allowing him to lift her onto the counter, he undid his fly and found a condom in his wallet. A moment later, he filled her, inch by delicious inch.

Someone banged on the door, but she ignored it, concentrating instead on the feel of him within. She leaned her head on his shoulder, and he kissed her hair. Their hips kept time, his fingers gripping the soft flesh of her thighs. He moved slow and sure, eliciting a sweet, excited response from her center. Arousal coated his entry and exit, smoothing the way, increasing her pleasure. And his.

The hard planes of Cady’s face tensed with raw energy, his eyes slitted almost shut. When they opened, Jane kept her gaze locked on his. He gave her a wicked grin right before he slipped a finger between their pulsing bodies, tantalizing her clit.

Pressure built with every intense stroke, with every second their eyes held. Something blossomed in her chest, a warmth, a depth of emotion she’d never felt before.

He teased her with his cock, one, two more times, and she sensed her imminent climax. Cady smiled again, something like awe softening his face. He touched her cheek sweetly, rubbing his thumb across her lips. Below, his fingers worked with the rest of him to bring her to the peak.

She kissed him as she came, milking his mouth with her tongue. Breathless, she returned to reality, realizing she hadn’t taken him with her. Not that he looked displeased, but she wanted to make him remember this. Wherever Cady Hewes went after today, she needed him to remember his time with Jane Caldwell.

She hopped down and turned around to face the mirror, then bent over the counter. She watched him, reveling in the idea that he loved her body. Parting her legs, she invited his entry.

Leaning over her torso, he planted his hands on her hips and slid inside her slick folds, filling her again. Breath hot on the back of her neck, his eyes dark, he thrust in and out, measuring her response in her reflection.

“I love it when you come inside me,” she murmured.

He muffled a curse and shoved home, pulsing with a hard, fast orgasm.

Another knock on the bathroom door brought Jane back to the present. They were going to miss the plane if they didn’t hurry. He kissed her as she cleaned up and pulled on the underwear stashed in her bag. She clutched his hand and peeked out the door. Whoever had been there was gone.

On board, she discovered Zach already in his seat, eyes closed and snoring lightly. Cady didn’t let go of her hand, not even when they settled into their cushy armchairs.

“I think your dad has the right idea.”

“Sleep, you mean?” she asked.

“I’m gonna need it if we intend to keep up this pace.”

She smiled, satisfied, and dozed off.


Hours later, the airplane descended into Albuquerque. Brown desert rimmed with purple mountains greeted Jane from beyond the window. She found comfort in seeing the familiar barren colors of New Mexico. Cady stirred beside her, blinking away hours of sleep.

“We’re home,” she said.

He nodded, running a hand through his overlong hair.

“Ever been to New Mexico?”

“Filmed a western out here.”

She thought she’d seen it. “Do you plan to visit any friends or family while you’re here?”

He’d mentioned business he needed to take care of, but she wasn’t nosy enough to ask about that.

“I’ll check in with my mom. She lives in Colorado. Maybe we could meet up.”

“Your dad around?”

“He died when I was sixteen.”

The dark, painful look on his face gave her the sense that there was more to that story. They had more in common than she’d thought. She knew what it was like to lose a parent. And to think she had.

Jane used Cady’s phone to dial the ranch, her stomach twisting tighter as each ring went unanswered. She tried Ally’s cell, her overworking heart calming when she heard her sister’s voice. The line crackled with static. “Allison?”

“Jane?”

“Where are you?”

“I’m…anistan…ith…ivate…ator.”

Jane only heard about every third syllable. “What?”

“Call…later.”

Okay, she understood that. The line went dead.

What was Allison up to?


Jane rolled her suitcase while Cady carried his and Zach’s bags to the parking garage where she’d left her silver Nissan. Night had come and gone midflight and it was almost four pm. When she’d departed, she hadn’t imagined returning with a new beau and her long-lost dad. She shook her head, the events of the last several weeks surreal.

“I’m worried about Ally,” she said as she swung onto the I-25. “Do you mind if we drive to the ranch?”

“I’d like that,” Zach responded quickly.

Cady looked agreeable. Was she taking him to her birth home out of concern for her sister, or because she wanted him to know more about her? Maybe she wanted to take him to the Five C Ranch to see if he fit there, in her world.

She headed toward Taos and drove two hours to the ranch. The place appeared deserted when they arrived. Not a light shone from the many windows of the main house or outbuildings. Tucked into foothills and acres of lonely desert, the house looked eerie in the late winter moonlight.

“Here we are.” Jane pulled up to the main entrance. She stretched her tense neck muscles, aching from hours of travel. Cady stepped onto the gravel drive in his leather boots, looking at home in the cold night air. She got the sense he could be at home anywhere. Maybe he could be at home with her.

“Hey, Dad.” She turned to Zach, who eyed the house through the windshield. “Must be strange to return after all this time.”

“That’s for sure,” Zach said, then joined Cady in the driveway.

A coyote howled in the distance. She shivered at the haunting sound.

“Come inside.” Jane used her key, opening the heavy wooden front door.

“Allison?” she called.

No answer. She’d been hoping her sister had returned from wherever she’d been during their phone call. No such luck.

Showing Zach and Cady into the living room, she went in search of her sister. Realizing that, with their mother gone, Ally now lived here alone, Jane suddenly became worried. Sure, Allison could shoot a hunting rifle. But a woman living solo all the way out here wasn’t a smart idea.

Jane searched the rooms yet didn’t find Ally. Back in the hall, Jane found a note held secure beneath the phone.

The Private Investigator called
.
He says he’s found another Zach and I’m going to look for him – Allison.

Jane scanned the note. Ally hadn’t said where she was going. Jane picked up the phone and called Margo, relieved when her sister picked up.

“Allison?”

“No, it’s me.”

“Hey, Janey.”

“How are the islands?”

“Just peachy.” Jane recognized the sarcastic twang in her sister’s voice.

“Have you heard from Ally?”

“I’ve called her, but haven’t gotten through. She’s not there?”

Jane tamped down the flare of worry. “No, but I spoke with her briefly on her cell. She left a note saying she discovered a new lead on Dad, but didn’t write her destination. Not that it matters now.”

“You found him? You’re obviously back home.” Margo sounded hopeful.

“Yes. You have to get your ass back. I did find him. He’s here.” Excitement made her voice tremble. “How soon can you be home?”

“Um,” her sister delayed, which was unlike her. “How about I just keep my original flight?”

“Isn’t that next Friday?” Why wasn’t Margo running home to meet their father? Her sister’s voice sounded funny, sort of shaky. “Are you okay?”

“What? Yeah. Of course.” Tough Detective Caldwell had returned. “But Jane, I think I’ve found the Zach Caldwell the P.I. said would be out here. Are you sure you’ve found our dad?”

Of course, she was sure. Wasn’t she? “Margo, you should come meet him for yourself—”

“Are you there alone with him?”

“No, I have a... friend with me.”

“Who?” Margo was direct, as always.

“Cady.”

A few moments passed and Jane bit her lip.

“How come I’ve never heard you mention a Katie before?”

Margo had misheard, but Jane was glad. Let her protective sister think she had another woman in the house. Lord knew what Margo would say if she thought Jane had brought home two unknown men.

“I’ll see you next Friday, okay?”

Jane battled disappointment. She wished Margo would come home sooner, but she could get to know Zach better before her sister returned.

“Love you,” Margo replied, and hung up.

A sixth sense told Jane she was being watched.

She spied her father in the doorway. “Zach? Everything okay?”

“I’m tired,” he replied. “Okay if I bunk down somewhere?”

“Sure. You can use the old office. It’s a guest room now.”

He shuffled down the darkened corridor, looking lost.

She frowned. Didn’t he remember his own home? “Third door on the left.”

“Right, of course. Memory’s not what it was.”

Either he had severe lingering trauma from his concussion, or the tiny prickle of unease she’d been ignoring since talking to Margo had validity. “I’ll show you the way.”

She waited for him to fall into step next to her, wanting to examine him closer.

“It feels good to be home,” he said, gazing at the paneled walls and antique furniture.

“We took down the family photographs after we thought you had died.”

“Ah,” he said.

She’d hoped to test him with her remark. They’d never hung photographs in the hallway. But, his non-committal response proved inconclusive. She wished Margo were here, sure the detective would have clever ways to subtly interrogate him.

Guilt nagged at her. What proof did she have that he wasn’t her father? Perhaps he’d sustained sufficient damage to his memory. Surely, being half-blown to pieces by a landmine would allow for his lack of familiarity with the ranch house.

Cady joined them, yawning.

“Goodnight, Dad,” she said, showing Zach into his room. “Welcome home.”

He nodded, smiling. “Goodnight, honey.”

She and Cady made their way back down the hall.

“So where’s your bedroom?” he whispered, grinning. “I want to see where you used to sleep.”

Wanting to forget about Zach, Allison, and Margo until morning, she smiled and tugged Cady into her old room, determined to make new memories there.


Jane woke to the sound of a crash. “What was that?”

Instantly awake, Cady shot up, pulling on his jeans and grabbing the nearest heavy object, which happened to be an old baseball bat. “Stay here.”

“Not a chance.” She slung on her robe and followed him into the hallway, listening intently, hearing a rustle from the library. Jane nudged Cady and they went in the direction of the noise.

BOOK: Hold Me
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