His to Cherish (23 page)

More comfortable.

Where my last memory of being with Aidan wasn't hearing that I was nobody important.

Forget it.

I tried, I did. But Aidan sensed my hesitation as we reached the foot of the staircase. His hand on my lower back moved to my hip.

He tightened his hold, stopping me.

“We don't have to do this,” he said, looking down at me, and I could feel his eyes examining me.

His bright eyes softened, and he moved closer, cupping the back of my neck with his other hand. He burrowed his fingers into my blond, messy locks and pressed his forehead against mine.

Every movement he made, every brush of his skin on me, caused my fears and concerns, the memories and hurt, to dissipate.

“I want to,” I murmured. Rational thought fled my brain when he stood close to me and looked at me the way he was.

“I want you.” I felt the rumble of his deep voice down to my toes and shivered.

I slid my hand into his and tugged him toward the stairs. “Then take me.”

I took two steps up before I felt Aidan's hand slide from my own. And then his hands were on my hips, lifting me and tossing me over his shoulder.

I squealed in shock, my fingers grabbing on to Aidan's backside pockets so I didn't fall over him as he carried me up the stairs.

His laugh rumbled and filled the air, slashing through any remaining doubts or worries.

He loved me. He hadn't said it yet, but he'd warned me he would, and that was more than enough for me.

I was so deeply in love with this man, I'd give him all the time he needed.

When we got to his bedroom he tossed me onto the bed and I let out an “oomph” as I hit the mattress.

“You're beautiful,” he said, his smile still wide and his eyes shining. He bent over me and crawled onto the bed until we were pressed chest to chest. He dropped to his elbows and his lips slid across mine. “I want to taste you everywhere.”

I shivered with delight and my hands gripped his biceps. Pushing my head back into the large and fluffy pillows, I grinned. “Then what are you waiting for?”

After Aidan had pulled off my clothes and pleasured me—not only with his tongue, but by making love slowly to me and giving me two more orgasms—we lay naked and wrapped in each other's arms. Our legs were entwined and our hearts beat against each other's chest when I finally…
finally
felt all my insecurities, all my doubts vanish.

I was never going to have the family I'd always thought I wanted, the family I dreamed of.

But there was no place I'd rather be than in Aidan's arms, being loved by him and tangled up with him.

Aidan and I spent the entire day together, lounging around his house, and eating only when necessary. We spent enough hours between his sheets and in various other places in his house making love, that my mind was a pool of mush and my legs were still shaky by the time we made it back to the carnival for Sunday night's music and fireworks.

We were looking for Paige and Suzanne and their husbands as well as Tyson and Blue. Declan and Trina were working at Fireside Grill, this weekend being one of their busiest times due to the influx of people in town.

“You're late,” Paige scolded when we finally found them amid the crowd inside the beer tent.

I opened my mouth to apologize when she smiled.

“Based on the blush on your cheeks I assume you have a good reason.”

Next to me, Aidan laughed. My cheeks burned with embarrassment.

“It's his fault,” I declared, pointing to Aidan.

He leaned down and whispered in my ear. “Actually, I think that last time was your fault.”

I flashed him a scolding look, but he shrugged unashamedly and took a pull from his beer.

Next to him, Tyson slapped him on the back and Blue covered her mouth, hiding her giggle.

Paige grinned.

“Right,” Paige said, and easily snuggled into Lucas's embrace as he reached us with two bottles of beer. “Thanks, babe. Lucas, this is Aidan; Aidan this is my husband, Lucas.”

The two men shook hands and gave each other a manly nod of hello. I assumed by the way Lucas took Aidan in he was also silently appraising the man, and when he smiled at me, giving me another nod, I took it as approval.

Who knew—men had the oddest silent conversations.

“Camden's on her way, but Suzanne just sent me a text that said they're not able to make it. Said something about not feeling well.”

“Is she okay?” I frowned.

Paige shrugged. “I assume so, I think she's really tired.”

A small twinge of that old pain hit my chest. I was happy for Suzanne, I truly was. But baby talk always caused me to mourn and remember that would never be me.

Based on the way Aidan's hand on my waist twitched, he understood what my sudden silence was for.

Then she turned to Aidan. “Is David coming tonight?”

I groaned inwardly. Ever since the night she and I met at Fireside, and then the last time we got together, she and Suzanne were in a rush to get him together with Camden. Although I still didn't see how it was a possibility.

“Nah, Fireside is always busy this weekend and Declan needed him to help out.”

“Help?” I asked, tilting my head. “Doesn't he work there?”

Tyson snorted and lifted his beer to his lips to hide the strange sound. “Nah. More like hiding. Or running. Asshole needs to get his ass back to work.”

“What?” I asked, jerking my head back.

Before I could ask any more questions—because, how
strange
—Aidan's lips were at my ear. “I'll tell you about it later, but it's really not for public knowledge.”

I forced a nonchalance I didn't feel. “Not my business, anyway.”

It was a lie, my curiosity was like a runaway train. I always assumed David was just staying to be there for Aidan, but he had also mentioned helping out Declan. Plus, with the strange look Trina gave Camden the last time we were all together, it meant there were secrets being kept. My mind began spinning, my overactive imagination kicking into high gear. It wouldn't be the first time a new friend of mine was suddenly engaged in something absurd like drug cartels and backroom deals and abusive husbands and mysterious pasts. Our lives had been crazy wild from the moment we'd met Blue.

“You're thinking really hard,” Aidan said. “It's not that big of a deal.”

I smiled, loving how easily he could read my mind. “Whatever you say.”

After a quick kiss, he turned to Lucas, who was talking to Tyson about the baseball season. The men engaged in a friendly rivalry between the Tigers and Cubs, which was Aidan's favorite team, and Blue and Paige and I chatted about nothing important. Before I knew it, Camden arrived and our group spent the next few hours laughing, drinking, and enjoying the music before we moved to an outdoor field for the fireworks.

Aidan was sitting on the blanket, hands behind him and his knees bent with his feet on the ground. He pulled me down and adjusted us so I sat between his knees.

As the first set of fireworks went off and background music began to blare through speakers, he wrapped his arms around his knees, caging me in.

“This is nice,” he whispered, nuzzling my neck with his nose.

The warmth from the air and his breath sent pleasurable shivers racing down my spine.

“And your friends are pretty incredible.”

“So are yours,” I whispered between the firework blasts. “Even if they aren't here tonight, it's clear you guys have a special friendship.”

I was thinking back to the night of Derrick's birthday. In all the hours of fun, my curiosity about David hadn't diminished.

“We all met in college,” he began to explain. “There's been some crazy shit between us, but they were there for me when Derrick was little, always helping out. We used to get some crazy looks around campus when we'd be hauling this little kid all over the place.”

I laughed softly, imagining these sexy grown men as barely adult males, struggling to take care of a kid. But it warmed me, too. Not only were they successful and handsome, they were incredibly kind.

Good men.

It was about time I'd found one of those.

“Anyway, David went through some shit in Chicago after Declan's ex-wife left him a couple of years ago, but that really isn't my story to share. He started talking about coming back to help him out at Fireside Grill and leaving his job, but Dec refused his help. Told him to get his own shit together. Then everything with Trina happened, and then Derrick…I think he just thought it was time. We're all trying to get him to pull his head out of his ass like Tyson said, but it's slow going. The man's messed up.”

“Your secret is safe with me,” I said, and twisted so my lips brushed against the column of his throat. A low growl escaped his lips.

“How is it that I've had you so many times this weekend and yet all I want to do is take you home right now and make love to you again?”

I swallowed, emotion thick in my throat. “How is it I feel the same way about you?”

His head dipped and his eyes met mine. His jet-black hair blended in with the dark night sky. Fireworks boomed in the distance. Lights from the blasts flashed in Aidan's dilated pupils.

Music blared through speakers. Kids ran with sparklers, dancing and squealing. Murmurs of verbal appreciation of the show going on echoed around us.

I heard none of it.

Saw none of it.

It was just Aidan and me—speaking a thousand words and making promises as we stared into each other's eyes, even though not a single word was spoken.

The screeching of a loud firework followed by a ground-shaking boom broke the contact between us and I shifted in his arms, looking back at the brightly lit sky.

As the finale thundered and blasted, making it feel as if we were close enough that the fire from the fireworks would rain down on our heads, Aidan's arm tightened around my shoulders and his lips rested against my ear.

“You know what I said outside Beth's the other day, that someday I'll be letting you know I love you and I don't want you worrying that it has anything to do with Derrick?”

A reply lodged in my throat. “Uh-huh.”

He nipped at my earlobe and soothed the sharp sting with his tongue and then his lips, sucking on my sensitive skin.

“I just want to prepare you that that day will come soon, and I want you to be ready to hear it.”

“Well this is a surprise.” Aidan's green eyes gleamed in the sun as he watched me approach.

I was on summer break and getting antsy for more work. I took a summer job working with Kate at the bakery, but hadn't been able to get my mind off Aidan all morning, so I decided to bring him a treat at his current job site.

He was becoming a habit I wasn't willing to kick.

I handed him a pink bag from Kate's Kakes and took a sip of my iced mocha drink. “I thought you might be hungry.”

His eyes lingered on the bag before slowly raking down my body, pausing on my legs before coming back to my eyes. A glimmer of interest flared in his gaze and my breath caught. This man disarmed me in every way possible, but especially when he was looking at me like he wanted to taste every inch of my skin.

“Hungry, yes. I most definitely am.”

The look on his face told me he wasn't talking about the food.

I lifted the bag. “I was talking about a cupcake.”

“Me, too.” He winked. “Get your head out of the gutter.”

Rolling my eyes, I looked around the dirt-covered lot I was standing in and its giant hole in the ground.

“Show me around?” I asked, trying to calm my fluttering pulse.

“Of course.” He took my hand and began walking me down the street to the model home at the entrance to the new neighborhood.

My jaw dropped when I saw the massive but beautiful home with a rock front. It had several steep peaks and gables, a three-car garage, and an incredible, professionally landscaped front yard.

Aidan's company had been contracted to build a new development of these gorgeous, dream-style homes that I could only imagine owning in my most vivid and far-reaching dreams. Each house sat on over an acre of land just outside the city limits.

He'd been working on this project since before we had met, and while he'd talked about the headaches it was causing, it was one of the largest building contracts he'd been given. He was working hard to ensure every home was perfectly built.

He almost lived at the site day in and day out, making sure all his crews—from the basement digging, to cement pouring, to framing, insulation, and finishing—were on track for meeting their deadlines. With the warm summer weather, they were busy today. The sounds of drills and electric nail guns and music blaring while the crews worked echoed in the air, almost making it difficult to talk.

“This home is incredible,” I told Aidan once we reached the front door.

“It's basically become my office.” He opened the door, stomping the dirt off on the wooden front porch before he let me in first. “Want a tour?”

I grinned as I brushed against him to walk through. His body stiffened and my gaze lingered on the pulse beating in his throat as I passed him. “Of course.”

As he closed the door behind me, the air thickened with whatever it was that seemed to constantly flow between us. It was always
there.
Palpable and warm and arousing.

I flinched as his warm hand landed on the small of my back and he gently prodded me toward the kitchen, where he took the bag from Kate's Kakes from me and placed it on the counter.

I gasped as we hit the large but warm and inviting space. It was elegant and majestic, but made for families at the same time. A see-through, double-sided fireplace set the kitchen and eating area away from a small sitting area. All around, floor-to-ceiling windows provided large amounts of sunlight, heating the house and giving a beautiful view of the outside landscape.

“Come on,” Aidan said, now holding my hand and tugging me toward him. I followed him reluctantly, saddened to leave this space that somehow called to me. I could almost see the family that would be there, the rambunctious kids running and sliding in their socks over the weathered and darkened wood floor, homework scattered across the large island. The cabinets were a dark cherry, and the granite countertops begged for me to rub my hands all over them. Or cook a holiday dinner and invite everyone I knew.

“You're amazing,” I said as we headed back to the entryway where the wood floor turned to marble and the doorways were wide and arched. Everything was open, flowing from one room to the next, but all the rooms had their own “emotion” to them. From the dark woodwork in the built-ins in the office to the white wainscoting in the formal dining room, the rooms alternated between masculine and feminine, but all of it screamed
home
and
comfort.

My eyes burned as we passed the bedrooms, two with their own private baths and the last two connected with a bathroom between them. It was decorated in pinks and purples, clearly made for a girl, and I couldn't help but think of the kids that I would never have.

“You okay?” Aidan asked when a choked sound escaped my throat.

My lips pressed into a thin line and I nodded as he led me toward the master bedroom. “This place is stunning.”

I tried to change the subject, and I didn't know if he caught the glistening in my eyes or not, but he allowed it and continued guiding me toward a small balcony in the master bedroom. I ignored the king-size bed that sat in the middle of the room with walls painted a dark blue, almost navy color but more green. It was unusual, like the Caribbean Sea at sunset, maybe, and it was startling in a good way against the white trim woodwork and vaulted ceiling.

“This is the best part of this house.” He pushed back sheer curtains and opened the French doors. Turning around, he held out his hand. “Come out here with me.”

My feet moved slowly, trudging over the thick caramel carpet until my palm was in his. He pulled me toward him with a sad smile on his face and kept tugging me until my forehead was pressed against his chest and our entwined hands were wrapped around my lower back.

“I didn't think those rooms would be hard for you to see,” he murmured into my hair.

I breathed in the scent of him and my shoulders relaxed. “Sometimes it hits out of nowhere, and sometimes I don't think about it at all.”

“I can imagine.”

And he could—in a way worse than I'd ever have to experience.