His for the Summer: 50 Loving States, Florida (14 page)

“To me it just seemed like everything came together after that night. I got the medical help I needed. A scholarship to a school far from New Orleans. By the time I came back to NOLA, I was a new guy. Squeaky clean. Working and living in a part of the city where nobody would have guessed what I used to do to get by. I committed to being Gus Martinez, a stellar employee at the Benton New Orleans. Eventually I worked my way through the ranks and got a vice president position at the Benton Group. Which meant a move to Las Vegas.”

“But that’s when it all came out. The mom I never knew. Turns out she was a socialite who’d gotten pregnant with me while partying with my father. She went through with the pregnancy, but ditched me and my dad as soon as I was born. And my father wasn’t much better than the street rat I used to be. He raised me for three years, but eventually died the same way as your brother. I bounced around from foster home to foster home and then job to job until one day when I was thirty-one, I found out I wasn’t all alone in this world. I had a half-brother. And he happened to have a shitload of money and a vision for this chain of hotels. So I quit my job at the Benton Group and then we started the Sorley New Orleans. That led to other deals, and Max, his other brother Cole, and me decided to start this company, Benton Brothers Ventures. They basically turned me into a billionaire overnight. And that’s why I changed my name from Gustavo Martinez to Gus Benton—because it was better for the business.”

He threw her a wry smile. “You asked me if I was in a legitimate business and I didn’t lie about that. I couldn’t be more legitimate than I am now. Who would have thought Tavo Martinez from da Ninth would have ended up becoming a hotel magnate venture capitalist? But that’s what I am. Max went all in with me, even gave me the Benton name. But I never forgot who I really was when I started out.”

“And I never forgot you.” He gave himself a moment to drink her in then, savoring the now-unfettered sight of her beautiful face for the first time since they’d reunited.

But that beautiful face continued to stare back at him in horror. “So now that you’re a billionaire, you think you can basically do whatever you want?” she asked. “That’s why you tracked me down in Miami?”

“No, that’s not how it happened at all, Cera. In fact, I made it a point not to track you down when you I came back to New Orleans. Even though I wanted to see you again, more than anything, I didn’t want to hurt you. And I knew you probably wouldn’t want to see me ever again after everything that went down that night. But I got transferred to Miami to head up the latest Sorley project. I was on my way to work and I saw you at the bus stop up the street. You were going to the beach with your sister.”

He smiled, remembering that day. “Seriously, I couldn’t believe it was you. But it was after all these years. And I tried to stay away. Tried to track you from afar, but then you got into more trouble than you could handle on your own. And I knew you wouldn’t accept help. Especially if you knew it was coming from me, so I...”

He wasn’t quite sure how to finish that sentence, but he didn’t have to. She inclined her head, her eyes flashing as she said, “So you’re trying to say this was all about guilt? You felt guilty about what happened that night with my brother, so you slapped a blindfold on me—for me? So I wouldn’t know who you were? And then in order to let me maintain my pride, you set me up as your summer
fuck
buddy? All so you could help me? That’s what you’re trying to say to me right now?”

“It wasn’t like that, Cera,” he said, clasping his hands in front of him, willing her to believe. “I know what it looks like, but it wasn’t like that. Not for me. I just wanted to be with you. And this was the only way.”

He wanted to throw more words at her, but he stopped when he saw her eyes drift down to his chest. He’d buttoned up his shirt, but he knew what she was looking at. Could feel the long thin line burning on his chest.

“And that?” she asked. “Not letting me touch you there? What was that about?”

Fuck…not this. He’d hoped to never have to tell her.

But he knew he couldn’t keep this part from her. No, he had to confess it all.

“Cera, I was born with a heart defect. One that made me pretty much unadoptable and kept me from doing a lot of things that could have gotten me out of the Lower Ninth. Like playing a sport, or even studying too hard, because I was always landing in the hospital right before a big test.

“But I’m good in a room and I’ll organize the fuck out of any group or deal you throw at me. Running your dad’s high school drug ring was pretty much the only thing I could do well back then. The hours were good, and if I had to do some time in a hospital, that was all right because I had a well-organized crew to keep things running smoothly until I was out. That was how I discovered early on that I had what turned out to be superior managerial skills. Plus, I didn’t really give a fuck about whether I lived or died, so I guess you could say the job was low-stress. Not too hard on my crappy heart.”

He rubbed his scar through his shirt. “When I say everything changed that night, I mean everything. I barely made it out of your neighborhood before blacking out. And when I woke up, it was two days later. The doctors told me I’d pretty much received a “Hail, Mary.” My heart had completely crapped out, but miraculously a donor had shown up. Get this, the same night, some black kid came in with two gunshot wounds. One to the head and one in his leg. So he was brain-dead, but his heart was a perfect match for me. And he’d registered as an organ donor…”

The look that came over her face then, told Gus what he’d long suspected. “You got your brother to do that, didn’t you?”

She nodded slowly. “I’d seen this documentary about donors in my Driver’s Ed class. Told him it was the least he could do. I think he only did it to shut me up. And then my dad’s lawyers advised him to go along with the organ harvest after Bruce was declared brain dead. They said he’d need stuff on the record. To make him look good in court.” Her lips twisted in a sour remembrance. “Not that it helped. They still gave him life with two counts of child endangerment, since it was one of his deals that my brother got killed trying to carry out.”

Gus, lowered his eyes, knowing she wouldn’t want to see the pity in his eyes. That night had saved his life, but it had ruined hers.

“I can’t tell you how sorry I am for all that happened to you, baby. But your brother—he saved my life. I got his heart inside my chest now, and that’s the only reason I’m standing here in front of you now. Fifteen years later, hoping we can figure out a way to get past what happened when we were kids and be together.”

This time he didn’t dare to hope. In fact, he kept his expectations low, bracing himself, for her to yell or worse. He’d be totally okay with her slapping him across the face. It was nothing less than he deserved. After all he’d kept from her.

But she didn’t yell. Or hit.

Instead, her entire face crumbled. Tears running down her face as she said, “Oh my God. I am idiot. I was in love with you. So in love with you. But you’re a monster.”

“No,” he said, splaying a hand across his scarred chest. “Not a monster. Just a man trying to find a way to be with you.”

“You lied to me,” she sobbed. “Forced me to prostitute myself. For what? To prove you weren’t Tavo Martinez from the Lower Ninth Ward anymore? To prove you were better than me? So much better that you could get me to do whatever you wanted with me? To me?”

“No, no…” he said with a shake of his head. Proving himself better than the street rat he used to be had been part of it. That much he couldn’t deny. But he hated how dirty she made it sound. Like what they’d had together had been all about him trying to get one over on her.

“You made a choice,” he reminded her. “I made the offer. But I didn’t force you to take it.”

He’d wanted her to stop crying and his wish abruptly came true. The inconsolable sadness in her eyes was suddenly replaced by blazing anger.

“Really?
Really
, Tavo—or Gus—or whatever you’re calling yourself these days. You think I
chose
to be with you? What choice did I have?” she screamed at him. “What choice did you give me?”

“What? You rather I let you get kicked out of your place. Leave you living on the streets?” he roared back, spreading his arms wide. “Because that’s where you were headed. That’s where you would have ended up, if I hadn’t stepped in. Yes, I’m Gus Benton now, and I’ve made a lot of myself. I know that. But I also knew all you would ever see me as is that kid I used to be. So I did what I had to do to get you the help you needed and finish what we started fifteen years ago. I’ll apologize for a lot of things, baby. I’ll beg your forgiveness if that’s what it takes. But I ain’t never going to apologize for doing for you, Cera. And I ain’t never going to say sorry for doing whatever it took to
keep you safe
.”

She stared at him then. Mute for long moments. Like she was truly trying to process the words that just came out of his mouth.

Then she snatched up the red dress from the floor.

“I’ll pay you back,” she said, her voice quiet with rage as she yanked the red dress on, covering her naked body.

“Cera, that’s not how I want this to end,” he said, reaching out to her. “Please just let me…we can figure this out.”

But she shoved past him, her face set and resolute. “I’ll pay you back.”

“You don’t have to pay me back. I don’t care about the money.”

“I’ll pay you back,” she screamed at him, her voice breaking. “If it’s the last thing I do on this earth, I will pay you back.”

“Cera, no…”

Gus was known as a smooth talker in his circle, but for once, he didn’t have any clue what to say. Or how to fix this.

And then she was gone. Walking out into the night, without so much as a backward glance. Leaving Gus in the hotel room to stew for a very long time about all the things he should have done. All the things he should have said.

But now it was too late.

21

“I’m going to pay you back.”

“Cera, I don’t want your money. I only want your love.”

“I’m going to pay you back.”

“Cera, you’re worth more to me than any amount of money.”

“I’ll pay you back.”

“Cera, I’m down on my knees, and I’ll stay here until you understand how not about money or even my stupid pride this is, baby.”

“Earth to Gus. Come in Gus!”

Gus turned from the window to discover Max in the doorway of his spanking brand new office.

“Max,” he said, struggling to tread out of the murky waters of his mind. “What are you doing here?”

Max came further into the office. “I’m dropping in unannounced to visit my little brother. That’s what I’m doing here,” he answered with no contrition whatsoever. “But I think the real question is what are you doing here? Donna out there says staring out that window has become your new past time.”

He should care that unlike Hank, his office assistant, Donna, didn’t seem to know better than to go around talking about her boss’s personal business. But Max was Max. Still easily able to get women to give him what he wanted, even with the custom Cartier wedding ring now adorning his left hand.

Also, he couldn’t bring himself to care. About Donna. Or anything other than all the things he didn’t say that night in Santa Fe.

“I’ll pay you back.”

“I don’t want your money, Cera, all I want—all I’ve ever wanted from you is your love.”

He went back to staring out the window. At the white, garden house estate in the distance. Lucky for him, the first high rise Sorley had been designed to look a lot like the Benton Las Vegas, with the executive fleet of offices banked on the twentieth floor, as opposed to the bottom floor as they were at the Sorley New Orleans. That meant he could look at the property every day from his office window. Whenever he wanted, for as long as he wanted. Look, and keep trying to come up with a configuration of words that would have kept her from walking out that night.

“I’ll pay you back.”

“What do you want from me, Cera? Whatever you want, I’ll give it to you.”

“So that’s the estate you just bought,” Max said, coming to stand next to him.

“Seriously, Donna has a really big mouth, Bro,” Max answered his questioning look. “Plus, I think she’s bored, because all you do is stare out the window all day.”

“The Sorley Miami grand opening is on track,” he answered, his voice a dead monotone. “What else do you want from me?”

“I don’t know. Some sign that you’re not having a really quiet nervous breakdown? Because why else would you buy a two-hundred-year old estate when you already have a South Beach apartment? And when you haven’t even bothered to get guest chairs for your office. By the way, am I going to have to pull the therapy card out again? Because I thought we talked about this back in New Orleans when I agreed to you coming out here by yourself.”

They had talked about this. And Gus had meant to start working on his inability to deal with more than the very bare minimum of furniture in a room.