Highland Warrior (37 page)
Authors: Connie Mason
“Please leave. I’m weary.”
Ross rose. “Gizela will have my hide if I tire you. I should check on Niall anyway. Please doona reject my love, lass. All I ask is that you give me a chance to prove how I feel.”
Gillian nodded jerkily, then clutched her head. “I canna think right now. Send Gizela to me.”
Ross bent and gently kissed the purple knot on her forehead. “I didna intend to distress you. I’ll fetch Gizela immediately.”
Gillian breathed a sigh of relief as the door closed behind Ross. Too many thoughts ran through her head. Ross’s kinsmen didn’t like her, his former leman had tried to kill her, and then Ross had stunned her by saying he loved her. No wonder her head ached.
Gillian loved Ross so deeply, it seemed like a miracle that he returned her love.
The problem, as Gillian saw it, was that she didn’t believe in miracles.
Chapter Eighteen
An agitated Angus Sinclair paced back and forth before Seana McHamish, ranting and raving, stopping periodically to stab a stubby finger at her.
“Why did you nae send word to me that Gillian was alive? I canna believe you let me believe the lass was dead. Did you arrange her escape and lie to me about it?”
No answer was forthcoming.
“I shouldna have opened my gates to you,” Angus raged. “I should have let you find a more welcoming shelter. Blast and damn! I sent a message to the MacKay, informing him that his daughter was dead.”
“I didna set Gillian free,” Seana lied. “If she escaped, one of your kinsmen was responsible. I didna know she was alive until I returned to Ravenscraig.”
Her lies fell on deaf ears. “You ruined everything. All my scheming, all my plans were for naught. Now Braeburn will never be mine. After years of preparing, of making things work my way, all is lost to me.”
“You are a fool, Angus Sinclair. The MacKay still has three male heirs in line to inherit Braeburn. I fail to ken how keeping the MacKenna’s wife in your tower would aid your plans. She isna free to wed you.”
“Nay, you are the fool, Seana McHamish. You ken naught about my plans. The terms of the truce state that the feud would resume if Gillian abandoned MacKenna and her marriage. I made sure MacKenna and his kinsmen heard Gillian state her wish to leave him.”
“I ken you wanted the feud to resume, but I dinna ken why. How would it benefit you?”
Exasperated, Angus dug his fingers through his hair. “Are you dense? When men die in the heat of battle, no one kens whose sword slays whom. Two of MacKay’s sons fell on the battlefield. The other three would have died, too, had the feud continued, and then MacKay himself would perish. I would then become laird of Braeburn through my marriage to Gillian.
“But MacKay had to seek peace and wed his daughter to MacKenna.” Disgust colored his words. “Gillian and Braeburn were lost to me, unless Gillian left MacKenna or MacKenna died. When she was forced from Ravenscraig, I was presented with the perfect opportunity to make my dream come true. And then you betrayed me and set her free. Even worse, you made me believe Gillian was dead.”
“You accuse me falsely,” Seana insisted, unwilling to admit her guilt. “Even if Gillian wasna set free, you couldna wed her. She has a living husband, and you canna predict that MacKay and his sons would die.”
A crafty smile curved Angus’s lips. “None of them would have lived long once the clans took up their swords and resumed the feud.”
Seana gasped as comprehension dawned. “You killed MacKay’s sons! Had the fighting continued, you intended to kill the MacKay and his surviving sons.”
Angus shrugged. “ ’Tis no worse than what you tried to do to MacKenna. Unfortunately your poison failed to kill the bastard. I had to take matters into my own hands or lose everything.”
Angus paced away from Seana and then spun around, his expression grim. “Did you flee to Ravenscraig after you left here?”
Seana nodded.
“Why did you leave? Whom did you try to kill this time?”
Seana grimaced. “Doona think you are better than I am, Angus Sinclair. I but gave Gillian a wee shove down the stairs, but the wench has more luck than sense. Had Ross not stopped her downward plunge, she might have tumbled all the way to the bottom and broken her neck.”
“You pushed Gillian down the stairs?”
“I hate her,” Seana spat. “She is the reason I lost Ross. She prevented me from fulfilling my dreams. wanted to be mistress of Ravenscraig. I wanted Ross MacKenna, but he banished me from Ravenscraig. Fleeing seemed a better choice than letting Niall take me where I didna want to go.”
“I wonder what MacKay thought when he received my message. I hoped he would hold MacKenna responsible for Gillian’s death. Had I known Gillian was alive and at Ravenscraig, I wouldna have sent the message to MacKay. Because of you, I have signed my own death warrant. By now Gillian has told her husband and father what really happened to her, how I held her prisoner and forced her to deny her marriage and lie to MacKenna. I’m as good as dead.”
“What will you do?”
Angus’s encompassing look took in the rank rushes on the floor, the aging, drafty hall, and the indefensible wooden curtain wall, and gave a scornful snort. “Sinclair Keep holds no fond memories for me. I havena tended to the upkeep, for I assumed I would be living at Braeburn one day.”
“We could wed and start anew in the Lowlands,” Seana suggested.
“You expect
me
to wed
you
, a woman whose own father doesna want her?” Angus sneered. “Nay, I have other plans. I intend to flee, but not with you. I am in possession of a good sword arm and will offer my services to the king and make my living as a mercenary. Those of my kinsmen who wish to accompany me can do so. I care not what you do, Seana McHamish.”
me
to wed
you
, a woman whose own father doesna want her?” Angus sneered. “Nay, I have other plans. I intend to flee, but not with you. I am in possession of a good sword arm and will offer my services to the king and make my living as a mercenary. Those of my kinsmen who wish to accompany me can do so. I care not what you do, Seana McHamish.”
Seana grasped his arm. “You intend to abandon me? I have done naught to gain your enmity. What will I do? Where will I go?”
“You are the cause of all my problems. Think you I believe you had naught to do with Gillian’s escape? I amna stupid. If you came here seeking succor, you came to the wrong place. I plan to gather what valuables remain in the keep and leave while the weather still holds. You may do as you damn well please.”
Turning on his heel, Angus left to consult with his kinsmen. Seana stared after him with searing hatred. What was she to do now?
Ravenscraig TowerRoss rarely left Gillian alone after her close call with death, though Gillian didn’t seem to welcome his company. Gizela had insisted that Gillian remain in bed several days following her mishap. Though Ross knew little about medicine, he made sure Gillian followed Gizela’s orders. When all seemed well with the bairn a sennight after her fall, Gillian was allowed to leave her bed.
She had just finished dressing when Ross entered the bedchamber and roared a protest. “What are you doing out of bed? Are you deliberately trying to harm our bairn?”
Gillian gave an exasperated snort. “Leave off, Ross. Gizela gave me permission to get out of bed. My bairn and I are both fine. I fully intend to carry him to term.”
Ross sent Gillian a skeptical look. “I suppose if Gizela has pronounced you well, then I shouldna protest,” he relented. “I’ll escort you down to the hall to break your fast.”
“I can see myself down, thank you.”
Ross shook his head. “Gillian, lass, why are you still angry with me? Did I nae bare my heart to you? Did I nae send Seana away, as you requested?”
Gillian sighed heavily. “Aye, you did, Ross, but I canna forgive you for denying our bairn. You should have kenned I was lying when I told you Angus and I had become lovers.”
Ross pushed an impatient hand through his thick hair. “I amna a mind reader. ’Tis past time you forgave me. I want us to be a family, sweeting. I want to go to bed with you at night and wake up with you in my arms in the morning.”
Gillian refused to meet his gaze. Unwilling to let the gap between them widen, Ross reached for her, pulling her gently into his embrace. “Mayhap you will believe this.”
He lowered his mouth and kissed her. Rather than fight him, Gillian wanted to cleave to him, to become his love, his life, but her pride kept getting in the way. And logic argued that a man did not declare his love for a woman he had once considered an enemy. Ross wanted his bairn, not her.
To Gillian’s disquiet, Ross’s kisses affected her as they always did, leaving her craving more. It seemed like forever since she had been in his arms this way. Of their own accord her arms lifted and twined around his neck. With a soft growl of triumph, he brought her closer, held her tighter, enveloping her in the heat of his warrior’s body. His kisses grew desperate, deepened, as his hands roamed freely over her back and bottom.
Despite her body’s response to Ross’s attempt to arouse her, Gillian resisted his seduction. She would know when her heart found the forgiveness Ross requested, and it wasn’t now. Removing her arms from his neck and placing her hands against his chest, she pushed him away. Dropping his arms, Ross stepped back. She could tell it pained him to stop, but she wasn’t ready yet to let him make love to her.
“Forgive me, lass. You are newly recovered from your fall. I had no right to press myself on you. But heed me well: I willna give up on you.”
Gillian had little doubt that Ross was right. How could she resist a man who had declared his love so sweetly? But meanwhile, it wouldn’t hurt him to suffer a wee bit of rejection.
Gillian knew she would allow Ross in her bed again, but she intended to speak to Gizela about her readiness to make love after her fall. She would do naught to harm her bairn.
Ross escorted Gillian to the hall. To Gillian’s surprise and delight, she received a warm welcome from Ross’s kinsmen. Everything that had happened in the past seemed to have been forgotten in the light of the news that Gillian was carrying their laird’s heir.
Both Gordo and Niall were already in their places at the high table. They rose when Gillian entered the hall and stood until she was seated.
“You’re looking well, lass,” Gordo said. “Ross has been worried sick over you.”
“He was worried about the bairn,” Gillian maintained.
“Mayhap, though I doubt the bairn was his only concern.”
Niall cleared his throat. “Gillian, do you really believe Seana pushed you down the stairs?”
Gillian looked at Niall, saw the devastation Seana had wrought, and wished she had the answer Niall sought. “Aye, Niall. As much as it pains me to admit it. Seana isna the woman you thought you knew. She is evil. She tried to poison Ross, and she drugged you. ”Tis time you opened your eyes to her true nature.”
“Thank you for being truthful. I fancied myself in love with Seana. I thought my love could change her, but apparently I was wrong.”
“You are better off without Seana,” Ross said. “I regret my past association with her, for she brought naught but trouble to Ravenscraig.”
“Amen,” Gordo added.
Gillian ate her meal in silence. Hanna had gone out of the way to please her, tempting her delicate digestion with her favorite foods. To Gillian’s relief, everything stayed down.
“I’ve neglected my duties of late,” Ross said after he had eaten his fill. “Some of the lads and I intend to inspect the livestock today. Will you be all right? I’m leaving Gordo in charge of the keep during my absence.”
“I’m fine, Ross, truly. Alice and I will be counting linen and inspecting stores today.”
Ross frowned. “Doona overdo it your first day out of bed.” Before he left, he lifted her chin and kissed her mouth.
Ross didn’t leave the keep immediately. While Niall and the others were saddling the horses and loading sacks of feed, Ross went in search of Gizela. He found her in the stillroom, grinding roots and herbs she used for medicinal purposes.
“There you are, Gizela,” Ross greeted her.
Gizela studied Ross through eyes brimming with intelligence and mystery. “Aye, laird, I was expecting you, and have an answer to your question.”
Ross stopped in his tracks, astonished by her words.
“You ken what I want?”
“Aye, laird, I do. Gillian is healed and her bairn is safely entrenched within her. If she wishes it, you may return to her bed and love her without fear of harming her or your son.”
Ross never blushed, was rarely embarrassed, yet he could feel his cheeks heating now. Then something Gizela had said captured his attention. “I’m going to have a son?”
“Aye, didna Gillian tell you?”
“Nay, Gillian is angry with me.”
“Her anger wanes, laird.”
“You know this?”
“I know many things.”
“Tell me how I can earn Gillian’s love.”
Gizela’s sagging features eased as her lips turned up into a smile. “You canna gain her love, laird.”
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