Authors: Hannah Howell
tell me if ye have hurt your back at all, love? I was afeared of moving ye at all in case ye have
broken something there.”
“Naught has been broken in my back, Gregor. I once saw a mon who had broken his back and he
couldnae move his arms or his legs. I can move both, as ye just saw. They arenae broken,
either. ’Tis certain that I have bruised my back verra badly, as weel as the rest of me, but I havenae broken it.”
“And your head?”
“Aches, but it isnae broken, either,” she said with a smile.
Gregor felt such a wave of relief wash over him that he was afraid he would unman himself again.
A few tears were acceptable when shed in private, but he did not wish Alana to see him shed any.
He sat down and tried to calm himself. When he had first seen her sprawled upon the ground, he
had feared the worst, and he had obviously not fully recovered from that fright. It was hard to
believe that she had survived the fall at all, let alone with only bruises and scrapes. He did not
completely trust such good fortune and it would take him a while to fully accept it.
“We need to get ye back up those rocks and then take ye to Scarglas so that Fiona can tend to your
injuries,” he said.
That hard truth made Alana wince in anticipation of the pain she would soon suffer. She had not
broken anything, but every bone in her body felt as if it had taken a vicious beating. There were
bruises and painful scrapes all over her body. She did not need to search for them to know they
were there. Her head throbbed so badly it made her feel nauseous. Alana really wanted to just lie
there on the ground for a little while until the pain eased.
She sighed and glanced at the rocky slope she had fallen down. It was going to hurt almost as much
going up as it had coming down, even with Gregor’s help. Although she did not consider it as the
cliff Gregor kept calling it, it would not be an easy climb. Alana knew she had no choice, however.
Delaying the ordeal would not save her from it, either.
Carefully, with Gregor’s strong arm around her shoulders to help her, Alana sat up. She slumped
against him as a wave of pain and dizziness swept over her. Slow, deep breaths cleared her head and
pushed the pain back a little, but she clung to Gregor for a few more minutes.
Fear still writhed inside of her, Alana realized. She had been absolutely terrified from the moment
she had realized there was no escape from those men. That did not really shame her, for she had put
up a good fight, but it was clearly going to take a while to completely shake free of that fear. The
fear of dying had not been the sharpest, either. It had been the knowledge that those men intended to rape her, all of them, that had caused the greatest part of her terror. If, by some miracle, she had
survived such a brutal assault, she had known even in her panic that it could mean an end to all the
beauty she had shared with Gregor. Alana did not think Gregor would turn away from her because
of it, but she would have turned away from him. All chance of a future for them would have been
irrevocably ended.
“Easy now, love,” Gregor murmured, unsettled by the faint trembling of her body. If just sitting up
caused her to be so weak and unsteady, he did not know how he was going to get her back to the
cottage. “Ye can rest here for a wee bit if ye want.”
“That would be nice, but nay, we must get up that slope, to the hut, and then continue our journey.”
“But ye are shaking, ye are so weak. Or it is the pain that causes ye to tremble so?”
“Ah, that. ’Tis fear, Gregor. Blind, unreasoning fear.” She sat back a little and gave him a faint
smile.
“They didnae—” Gregor began, nearly choking on the words, for he was coldly horrified that those
men had succeeded, at least once, in abusing her even though he had seen no sign of it. He did not
care about the act itself, for it would have been rape which, in his mind, was no more than another
kind of beating. What concerned him was how such an intimate assault might affect Alana’s ability
to return to his arms with all the passionate fire she had gifted him with before the attack.
“Nay, they didnae rape me,” she said, “although they planned to.” Just saying the words made her
shiver with fear and she looked up toward the top of the slope she had fallen down. “The moment I
realized I was cornered, I was very, very afraid.”
“Of course ye were,” Gregor said, sharing her remembered fear if for different reasons, some of
which he knew were selfish ones. “Ye could have died.”
“Och, aye. Either from the abuse they inflicted or because they didnae wish to leave me alive to tell anyone about it. Yet it wasnae dying I was so afraid of. I just kenned that even if I survived, e’en if I recovered in mind and body, they would have destroyed something precious to me.” She spoke
softly now, knowing she would be revealing something about her feelings for Gregor if he cared to
look closely. “They would have tainted all we have shared, stolen away all the beauty of it.” She
could tell he was moved by her words by the way he ever so slightly tightened his hold on her.
“I wouldnae have turned away from ye,” he said, his certainty of that weighting his every word. “I
am nay one of those fools who think that, somehow, a woman invites such violence.”
Alana smiled. “I ken it. I dinnae understand why I do, but I do. That was one fear I ne’er felt.”
“Thank ye for that, love.” He kissed her cheek, deeply touched that she would have such faith in
him, especially when he gave her no words of love or promises that they would stay together past
the time their journey ended.
She started to shrug, quickly lessening the motion when it caused her pain. “It will just take a wee
while for me to shake free of that fear. I just didnae want them to ruin everything, e’en the
memories.” She frowned up the slope. “They are gone, aye?”
“Aye. Three have gone to hell where they belong and, as I told ye, the others have run for their lives.
I was quite awe-inspiring,” he drawled and was pleased to hear her laugh. “Are ye ready to give it a
try?” he asked, nodding at the slope.
“Ready,” she said as he helped her stand up, “but nay too happy about it.”
Gregor quickly put his arm around her again as she swayed slightly. She was recovering well
despite this sign of weakness. That such a small, delicate woman could even stand up after such a
fall said a lot about her strength. Yet he did not think she had regained enough of that strength to
climb up that rocky slope. Unsteady as she was, she could easily slip and fall, and this time she
might well break something. She could also all too easily take him down with her.
“Do ye think ye could hold on fast to me if I carry ye up?” he asked. “On my back,” he added when
she frowned. “Ye must be certain ye can hang on, for if ye fall from my back, I willnae be able to
catch ye.”
“’Twould test my strength far less than trying to climb up there myself, but ’twill make it verra
awkward for you.”
“Nay, ye arenae verra heavy and I trust ye to keep as still as a weel-stuffed pack.”
“Then aye, I will get on your back. It galls me a wee bit to need such help, but far better that pinch to my pride than falling back down and breaking something. I would probably take ye down with
me as weel.”
“’Tis what I was thinking. Although I suspicion ye would break my fall, as ye would go down
first.”
“That would surely finish me off. Weel, let us get this over with.”
Gregor had to smile when he got her settled upon his back, her legs wrapped around his waist and
her arms around his neck. It had obviously pained her and even though she had muttered curses in a
near whisper, he now knew that she had learned an intriguing array of colorful oaths. Her brothers
or male cousins had clearly not taken much care in watching what they said around her.
“Do ye feel secure, lass?” he asked, for even though he could feel the strength in her arms and legs
as she gripped him, there was still a faint tremor rippling through her body.
“Secure enough to hang on until we reach the top,” she replied, willing herself to speak in a firm,
steady voice.
He nodded and started to climb up the rocks. Alana fought to ignore the pain coursing through her
body and concentrate only on holding on and not moving. There had been a note of humor in
Gregor’s voice when he had spoken of her staying as still as a well-stuffed pack, but she had
understood the seriousness of that gentle command. Any movement she made could cause Gregor
to slip, and that would send them both tumbling back down onto the hard ground.
The moment they reached the top, she started to loosen her grip on him, the strength in her battered
body fleeing her in a rush. Gregor quickly steadied her and helped her stagger to a spot several feet away from the edge. She sat down and struggled to ease the pain and conquer the weakness that had
her trembling so badly. Taking slow, deep breaths, she reached out for enough strength to get back
to the little cottage as she watched Gregor search each of the dead men sprawled upon the ground
for anything of value. It was a morbid chore, but Alana knew the men in her family would do the
same. If it was one of their own, they did it to make certain his things would be sent back to his
family, and if it was the enemy, it was considered the spoils of war.
“Ye are looking a wee bit steadier, love,” Gregor said as he crouched by her side and kissed her
cheek. “Shall I carry ye back to the cottage?”
“Let me try to walk first,” she said. “My cloak and other things are just o’er there and they look as if they are unharmed. Ye could use my cloak to make a sack to carry those things.”
“Aye, good idea. They were verra poor thieves, I think, for they had but a verra few things which I
am fair sure arenae theirs.” He made a sack of her cloak and shoved the swords in the sheaths and
the daggers he had collected into it, as well as one small sack of coins and a few rings and pendants that he suspected had been stolen. “The ones who fled here paused long enough to grab the rest of
the horses, which would have been the truly valuable boon.”
“And left their three companions to fend for themselves,” she said and shook her head.
“They may have had some arrangement and are waiting for their friends at some hiding place, but
aye, I think they just deserted them without even one look back.”
“No loyalty at all, then.”
“None.” He helped her to her feet and placed a steadying arm around her waist. “Are ye sure ye
want to walk, lass?”
“For a bit, aye. We must continue our journey, and riding on the horse will undoubtedly make me
all stiff and sore. Mayhap if I walk a wee bit now, I can lessen that suffering later.”
“I wish we could wait a wee bit, until ye feel better and stronger, but I have no knowledge of the
healing arts. Aye, right now ye could advise me, but what if ye fall ill or swoon? Nay, I would
really like Fiona to have a look at you. Aye, and get ye into a soft, warm bed with maids and all to
help care for ye.”
“The latter certainly sounds welcome,” she murmured, concentrating on putting one foot in front of
the other.
By the time they reached the cottage, Alana felt as if her legs were made of porridge and her head
throbbed. She had to smile, however, at how noisily Charlemagne greeted them. When Gregor
urged her down onto their bed of blankets, the cat quickly curled up at her side, purring loudly. She idly scratched his ears as she watched Gregor pack up their things.
“I think he was afeared that we had left him behind,” she said.
Gregor shook his head. “He hasnae realized that cats are supposed to be aloof, sly, and solitary in
their habits. I told ye, he is confused. And so am I, for I am calling it a he.”
“That is naught but rumor and lies. A cat can be as friendly and as in need of affection as any dog.
Most people dinnae show them any, however, but leave them in the stables or the kitchens
expecting them to work for their scraps by keeping the vermin out of the meal. Most of the cats my
family has are verra friendly.”
“Weel, I am nay sure ye ought to be carrying this friendly fool cat this time,” he said.
“Aye, I can do it. ’Tisnae a big cat.”
“We can try it. Now, do ye need anything to eat? I doubt ye broke your fast.”
“Are there any oatcakes left?”
Gregor handed her the last of the honey-sweetened oatcakes and went out to ready the horse for
their journey. He would have to keep a close watch on her. Alana seemed determined to push
herself to the very limits of her strength and, until he was certain she had not hurt anything inside of her, he could not allow her to do that. He was worried enough about taking her on a ride so soon
after her fall, but she needed the kind of care he could not give her.
He caught her yawning when he returned to the cottage and smiled. That suited him just fine. If she
was sleeping then she could not try to do too much too soon. It would also make the journey a lot
easier on her battered body.
They had barely gone two miles before Alana fell fast asleep. Gregor tightened his grip on her just a little and settled her more comfortably in front of him. It would be a little difficult to travel this way, but he felt it was best. She would not be able to find such respite from her pain for the whole trip, but at least this rest might give her the strength to endure it.
He found himself constantly looking down at her as they rode along, checking to make sure her