Hexed (The Gwen Sparks Series Book 4) (20 page)

“I will,” Fiona cut in. Ethan balked, and she raised her chin just a notch. Looking over at her boyfriend, she said, “She’s my best friend. Not only has she put her life on the line for me, but if the roles were reversed, I know she’d do the same. I’ll do whatever I can to help her now.”

I smiled. “Maybe there’s hope for you yet.”

Fiona nodded in my direction and spun around to leave, Ethan shaking his head behind her as he followed.

After Fiona and Ethan left I suggested to Gwen that we watch a movie. I wanted to take her mind off everything and just…be with her. I sat at one end of the couch while Gwen curled up beside me, her head resting on my chest. I had popped in
Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein
, knowing it was one of her favorite movies and hoping it would cause something to click inside her brain.

I caressed her shoulder, watching her profile as she watched the movie. Her lips bent upward at something on the television but quickly straightened into a flat line again. It bothered me that she hadn’t told me what was bothering her yet. She had to know she could trust me, confide in me. I’d proven myself repeatedly, but then, she couldn’t remember that.

Losing myself in my thoughts, I wondered if Fiona would succeed in finding all the ingredients and what it would mean if she didn’t. Last resort, I would seek Amara’s help. Being a Fate, she probably already knew what was going on. Maybe she knew the day she gave me Gwen’s name what would happen. Fates are tricky creatures, always having ulterior motives.

“Bela Lugosi,” Gwen whispered at the vampire on screen. Sitting up, she stared at the TV a little longer before she turned toward me. “Bela Lugosi,” she repeated, “that’s the actor that plays the vampire.”

My eyes flicked to the television and back to Gwen. “You remember him?”

She nodded, a slow smile appearing on her face. “I think he’s my favorite vampire, or was my favorite. I’m not sure, but I remember him.”

That caused me to smile if only because it was the most random thing she could’ve remembered. These little arbitrary moments she had were one of the things that drew me to her. Her mind was such a spontaneous place that I never knew what to expect from her. The fact that she could surprise me was refreshing.

Gwen was quiet for a long while, having gone back to staring at the screen. She tilted her head, eyes thinning as she thought about something.

“I was sixteen,” she murmured to herself, “and…upset about something. Fiona was there, we were in a large bedroom…with stone walls and a four-poster bed.” She curled her upper lip in and chewed on it. When she was sixteen her parents had kicked her out and sent her to live in Moon at the NAWC’s castle. It was where she met Fiona. Remaining quiet, I gave her space as she worked out the details.

“We watched this movie,” she finally said, turning to face me. She let out a short breathy laugh. “I remember.”

Hope swelled in my chest. “Is that all you remember?”

She thought for a few seconds and then her smile wavered. “Yeah, I’m still getting static when I try to remember other things.” Her body sagged. “But this is the most I’ve remembered since my memories have been taken. That’s something, right?”

“Yeah, it’s a good sign,” I assured her with a nod. A curtain of hair fell across her face as she rested her elbows on her knees, and she swiped it back, tucking it behind her ear. My God, she was beautiful. Her t-shirt hung off one shoulder, revealing ivory skin. I wanted to press kisses there, make a path up her throat.

Clearing the lusty thoughts, I said, “Did something happen at lunch today?”

She looked over at me, hesitating. “Reece and Bree told me about everything that’s happening in town. They said the souls unable to move on are prisoners in their bodies, that it’s torture.”

“That’s why they’re here,” I told her, “to move the spirits on.”

Gwen stood up, running both hands through her long hair. She stood with her back toward me. Stretching an arm along the back of the couch, I stared up at her. The voices from the television invaded the silence between us, the humor awkward against the tension.

When Gwen turned to face me, her arms were folded across her chest. “This is because of me, because of what you did. The people of Flora are paying for me living.”

“They won’t be paying for long, Gwen. Fiona and Ethan will get the ingredients for the spell, and we’ll change the past.”

Her eyes snapped to my face as her jaw set into a hard line. “Have you ever thought that maybe I’m not supposed to live? I died that day in my shop, Dorian. Travelling back in time won’t make a difference.”

“It will make a difference,” I growled, angry at even the thought of her death, “because I’ll be there to save you this time. That rogue won’t get a chance to even touch you.”

She laughed bitterly. “So your plan is to what, shadow me my entire life to keep me from dying? Damn the consequences, right?”

I stood up, seething. “If I have to, yes! Do you really fault me for wanting to keep you safe, keep you here?”

“You’re not keeping me safe, though. You’re going against your very own design, ignoring the rules because you can’t cope with the idea of losing me.” Gwen looked away, taking a moment to suck in a deep breath. “This is life, Dorian. People die every single day. Families lose loved ones. Every. Single. Day. What makes you so special?”

Pain and pressure gripped my chest. The very idea of Gwen not being here was gut-wrenching. As Death, I would be able to see her again in spirit form, but I would still be losing her.

“Given the power, don’t you think every other person who has lost someone would have done what I did? The only difference is that they can’t and I can.” I moved toward her, ignoring when she shied away from me. “Think of me as a selfish bastard if you want, but know that I did what I did because…” I choked, my mouth agape with the knowledge swirling through my head.

“Because?” Gwen drawled, scowling at me.

I shook my head, amazed at what I was about to say. “Because…I love you.” I released an uneven breath. “And saving you was worth any fucking consequence I had to face.”

The scowl marring Gwen’s face smoothed away as she looked up at me. Her eyes glistened with unshed tears. When she looked away from me, I could see a single tear slide down her cheek. Was she happy or sad? My thoughts and feelings were one big cluster fuck of confusion. I’d just told a woman I loved her. It
had
to be love. It was the only thing that explained why I did what I did, why losing her was so unacceptable. Somehow while spending time with her that nasty little emotion seeped into my system and infected me. I’d spent centuries pitying all the fools who succumbed to love only to become one.

“Say something.”

Her head lifted. “What do you expect me to say, that because you love me it makes what you did okay? Should I just ignore the fact that people are suffering because I’m alive?”

Frustration unlike anything I’d ever known burned me from the inside out. I wanted to grab her shoulders and shake her until she understood, but I knew rattling her wouldn’t dislodge the stubbornness in her brain.

“What do you expect
me
to do? Allow you to die, watch your spirit move on while I bury your body? Is that what you want?”

“No,” she admitted, “but it’s what I
should
want. It’s what’s right, and right decisions are never easy ones.” She laughed wryly. “The only reason I’m alive right now is because Death fell in love with me.”

I stepped forward, grabbing one of her hands. To my surprise, she didn’t pull away. Her eyes fell to our joined fingers. Deep down I knew she wanted to live, that all her anger tonight had been survivor’s guilt. I hated myself for causing it, but I also couldn’t regret my actions because it allowed Gwen to be standing in front of me right now. And given the chance, I would do it again.

SOMEONE WAS KNOCKING on my door, impatiently. I shot up in bed, my eyes darting to the alarm clock—2:47 a.m. Realization that it may be the NAWC zapped the last traces of sleepiness fogging my head.

“Stay here,” Dorian said, getting out of bed. His voice caused me to jump, having not realized he was awake. Then again, the banging on the door was loud enough to wake up the hardest sleepers. The entire apartment complex was probably awake.

Dorian slipped out of the room, and I got to work at finding whatever clothes were littering the floor. If it was the NAWC at the door, I sure as hell didn’t want to be arrested while wearing pajama boxers and a tank top, braless, no less. I stubbed my toe on the foot of my bed and let out a string of curses, hopping up and down on one foot while cradling my abused toe.

I slipped off my boxers and worked a pair of jeans onto my legs, all the while trying to listen for a fight breaking out in the kitchen. What I heard stopped my attempt at getting dressed.

“What the hell are
you
doing here?” Dorian said. I recognized his tone as one he uses with people he doesn’t particularly care for. I didn’t think he’d address the NAWC that way so I walked with caution toward my door and peeked my head out. A woman with long blonde hair and a curvy body sauntered up to Dorian and trailed a finger down his chest. I instantly hated her.

“Aw, you didn’t miss me?” She cooed, her cherry red lips forming a pout.

I stepped out of my room and headed down the hall, my arms folded across my chest to keep my fisted hands hidden. If this was one of Dorian’s ex-girlfriends I was going to first kick the bimbo out, and then kick Dorian in his lying balls. How did she even know where I lived unless he told her.

“Who the hell is this?” I sneered. Dorian had this faraway dopey look on his face and the blonde’s hand was still resting against his chest. The sudden rush of jealously made me sympathetic of the Hulk and his condition, because if she didn’t get her hands off him, a bitchy monster was about to surface.

“I’m really feeling the love,” the woman said. Her hand slid down Dorian’s chest, only falling away after reaching the end of his stomach. “I’ll have to tell your vampire that I deserve a raise for having to work in such a hostile environment.”

Dorian cleared his throat, blinking out of whatever spell he’d been under. The shift of his eyelashes told me he was looking over at me. I glared at him before aiming it toward the woman.

“What the hell are you talking about?” I asked, and then, because the woman wasn’t responding quickly enough, looked at Dorian said, “What the hell is she talking about? Who is she?”

“Lauren Hayes,” Dorian answered, taking a couple steps toward me. I was still ticked that he had allowed her to touch him. What else would he have allowed her to do if I wasn’t here?
Whoa, jealous much?

Lauren spun around, her layered hair swinging around her face. “What’s going on here?”

“That’s what I’ve been asking,” I said in exasperation, throwing my hands out in a what-the-hell gesture.

“Gwen doesn’t remember you; she’s lost her memories,” Dorian supplied. “What are you doing here, Lauren?”

Lauren arched a thin eyebrow, her blue eyes studying my face. “What do you mean,
she lost her memories
? Why wasn’t Aiden notified?”

Dorian snorted and folded his arms across his chest. “Why the hell would we notify the vampire?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Lauren said, her voice all sass and attitude, “maybe because they’re bonded, and Gwen is under his protection.”

“What?” I asked in confusion. “I’m under the protection of Aiden, my
ex
-boyfriend?” I stressed the word ex so she’d understand the absurdity of her words. Worry coursed through my brain for a split second as I wondered if Aiden was some kind of possessive stalker. Even so, what did Lauren have to do with it? In her skin tight jeans, purple bustier, and fuck-me-heels, she looked like she belonged on a street corner, not standing in my kitchen.

“
Was
under his protection,” Dorian said between clenched teeth. “He’s not a part of her life anymore. If you haven’t noticed, he fled and Gwen has me.”

“They’re bonded,” Lauren stated again, “which makes him still very much part of her life. Plus,” she moved across the room and opened the fridge, “once a vampire’s, always a vampire’s. If you thought him leaving meant he was giving up, you thought wrong. That man is crazy about her.” She tipped her chin in my direction, and then bent down and grabbed a bottle of water.