Sterling kicked the ground. “Sometimes I think it’s his favorite emotion.”
“He may need time to adjust,” Paige offered.
Sterling wouldn’t look at her. “You don’t think twelve years is enough?”
She knew there was nothing she could say to that, so she changed the subject. “Since we’re all here, why don’t we start milking? I’ve got a bucket.” She grabbed the one that she had sat on earlier. “Do you think your dad has Ziploc bags or should we pick them up at the local market?”
“I doubt it,” Sterling said. “Dad doesn’t have anything that’s disposable. But my mom loved to can. Can we put it in quart jars?”
Austin piped in. “Each doe gives about three quarts per day. Your mother better have a lot of jars.”
“Well, she used to have hundreds.”
Sterling led them to a pantry off the kitchen. Floor to ceiling shelves ran the entire length of the room covered with empty canning jars. The other side had filled ones and some commercially canned goods.
“This will definitely cover it,” Paige said, pinching four jars together with each hand and turning to go. Sterling’s eyes were glued to the full jars.
“What’s wrong?” she could see his pinched forehead.
When he spoke, his tone was low and rough. “Ten years she’s been gone, and look how much is left. I wonder if he refuses to eat from the jars because he wants to pretend she’s still here.”
The ache he felt seemed visceral, and Paige was quite certain that whatever caused him to leave home wasn’t as difficult as losing his mother. That’s what probably kept him away. Paige waited a moment out of respect until Sterling turned and grabbed his own jars. Only then did Austin do the same.
They began milking, but with the single five-gallon bucket and making multiple runs back to the pantry, it was a slow process. By the time they finished and headed toward the house, Paige was famished. She smelled bacon and eggs cooking.
She stepped in the kitchen and caught sight of the set table. “It smells wonderful. Thank you, Mr. Keller.”
“Don’t thank me for smelling it.” Sterling’s dad held a spatula. “Let’s eat.”
Everyone sat but Sterling. “Dad, what’s this?” He picked up the milk carton in the middle of the table.
“If you don’t know by now, I did a rotten job of raising ya.” His dad chuckled.
“No.” Sterling stared at his dad. “Why didn’t you get milk from the dairy?”
His father lowered his eyes. “Dairy’s gone. Years now. But that’s a discussion for another time. Sit and eat. It’s gettin’ cold.”
The way he said it, Paige guessed that time would never come. A farmers’ business is his own accord. Uncle Bill was the same way. Sterling couldn’t seem to accept it. He held his tongue, but after two bites wiped his mouth, dropped his napkin on his plate, and got up to leave.
He’d barely walked out of the room before he rushed back in. “The sheriff’s car just pulled up. Stay where you are.”
They were all on their feet at the window before Sterling was halfway across the area between the house and the barn. Brown with gold lettering, the sheriff’s sedan parked next to a cottonwood which obscured Paige’s view of the driver. The door opened, and she could see Sterling facing the officer, but all she could make out were the lawman’s shoes. He looked to be of small build. They talked for a long time, and Paige started to worry.
“Are they okay?” she asked Sterling’s dad.
“Who knows? Misty is one who can hold a grudge.” His dad seemed thoroughly amused, and Paige realized if she moved to the other side of him, she could probably see everything. She did and was shocked to find the person in the uniform was a gorgeous blonde with a mane that rivaled most supermodels. Misty, as Mr. Keller had called her, threw her arms around Sterling’s neck and kissed him full on the mouth. Sterling had a hand on either of her hips. Paige was done watching.
She marched out the door and directly toward the two. Sterling saw her coming. She wanted to wipe that smile off his face, but he seemed pleased she was there. “Paige, Misty wanted to meet you.”
“I bet she did,” Paige said.
For an officer of the law, Misty didn’t seem very observant. She didn’t even pick up on the fact that Paige was fuming. Instead, the girl mirrored Sterling’s pleasant expression. “Anyone that could get Sterling back where he belongs is a friend of mine. How’ dee do? I’m Misty.”
Paige blinked. “And the sheriff?”
She flipped her hair back, exposing the badge pinned to her right shoulder. “Only a deputy.” Misty’s smile seemed to fade a bit. “Nope, the sheriff’s a whole different matter, God help us all.”
As if to cover her frustration, Misty put on a fresh smile. “Sterling’s dad told me you brought your stock out here while your barn’s getting fumigated. If you’re having issues with a fungus or disease, you probably need to register with the agricultural extension. I’m responsible for animal control, too.”
“No, it was just rats.” Paige glared at Sterling who wore the trace of someone else’s lipstick.
“That sounds fine.” Misty turned back to Sterling. “You going to be at the Pit this Friday? Everyone will be dying to see you.”
“Wouldn’t miss it.” The way he said it made Paige quite sure this was the old girlfriend his dad had mentioned.
As Misty pulled away, Paige was sure of one thing. Sterling had not left Dallas to get away from a girlfriend. There were obviously still active feelings on both sides of the fence, and she didn’t have any desire to get in the middle of them.
Chapter Thirty-One
R
EMNANTS OF A MASSIVE GRIN PLAYED
across Sterling’s face. “Well, that was a close one.”
“I have to agree,” Paige said. “You two seemed very
close
.”
He laughed at that. “Nah, she always wanted more than I could give her.”
Paige reached out and wiped off his bottom lip with her thumb, showing him the pink smear left behind. “Well, at least you gave her something.”
“It’s not like that.” Sterling caught her eyes then peered toward the house.
Neither Austin nor Sterling’s dad had ventured out when she did. She could see both their faces watching through the big picture window, apparently fascinated by their discussion. She blushed.
“Hey,” Sterling said. “Can I show you something?” He took her hand tight in his own and headed out the driveway.
Paige’s sneakers scuffed against the gravel as she slowed once they reached the highway. “Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.” Sterling looked both ways and tugged her across the road with him. A cattle gate on the other side had a padlock on it. Sterling ran forward to twist the center dial.
The lock opened. “How did you know the combination?”
Sterling shook his head. “Nothing ever changes in a place like this. That’s part of why I left.”
Paige was dying to hear the other part.
After a quarter mile the pines thinned, opening to a meadow. Clusters of daffodils and crocuses were nestled in patches where the sun could peek through the thick canopy of leaves overhead. A large fallen log two and a half feet in diameter looked worn from people using it as a bench. Sterling sat in the grass with his back against it and invited her to do the same. As she reclined beside him, Sterling lifted his arm and pulled her close. She allowed it but wasn’t comfortable with either the position or her current feelings for the man. “Sterling, we need to talk.”
“That’s what we’re here for.” His gaze was directed to the clear sky where an eagle glided in circles above them. “Do you know what this meadow is called?”
“No idea,” she said, catching sight of the bird swooping down on its prey.
“Make-out meadow. This is where teenage boys come with their girls. Dad calls it spooning.” Sterling was staring at her.
She stared back but not for the same reason. “How many times did you come here with Misty? No, don’t tell me.” Kneeling up, she faced him. “This was a bad idea.”
“No, it’s the best idea I’ve had in a long time.” He took her hand, firmly this time. “Paige, I haven’t let anyone in my life since I dated Misty when I was eighteen. For how much I messed up, I never felt I could.”
She tried to open her mind to what he was telling her, but the image of him kissing Misty clouded everything else. “What changed?”
“You.” The way he looked at her was so much like the time she had bought that dress in Dallas. It made her feel beautiful. He continued, “I’ve never met anyone whose life was driven by this sense of making the world better. It’s like you don’t care about money or what people think. You just do what you know you should.”
Could she let herself get sucked into this again? “Two days ago in Texas you didn’t tell me Elaine was pulling something when you knew she was. Yesterday you told Dotty you’d never marry me. You kissed Misty on the mouth just a couple of minutes ago. What am I supposed to believe?”
“Hey, she kissed me, and the rest is, well, inexcusable.” He ran his thumb gently back and forth across the top of her knuckles, staring at her hand. “It won’t happen again. Give me one more chance. I want you in my life. No, I
need
you.”
“I don’t know.” Paige suddenly realized how true those words were. “I don’t know anything about your past. Why did you leave here? Your dad seems great. You had a gorgeous girlfriend. What happened?” She dropped her hands and met his eyes. What she saw there was pain.
He lowered his head. “For so long I thought I was in the right about this mess. I was so angry that I never considered my dad’s side of things. It was my senior year of high school. I’d already been accepted to Stanford. So when Dad and I butted heads, I took off. Went to college early.”
Paige couldn’t swallow his explanation. “Then why didn’t you come back for all those years?”
“It took me two years to cool off. I’d bought my airplane ticket for summer break, but then my mom died before I got home.” He swallowed. “I guess I blamed Dad for the years I missed with her. It was stupid.”
She wanted to tell him it would be alright, but she knew from losing her parents and now her uncle that it never would be. Sitting back against the log, she turned toward him and rested her head against his chest. “I’m sorry.” There was nothing else she could say.
“So was I, until a few days ago,” he whispered. “When I saw your house, it was like coming home. In Texas, you reminded me about what was really important. I’ve never left a deal on the table before, and now I don’t even regret it.” He lifted her chin. “Because of you, I’ve found that person I used to be. Paige, you brought me back.”
Her heartbeat quickened. As he closed in to kiss her, she froze, not sure what to do. She thought of Joe’s kiss in the car and felt the same awkward stiffness. His lips met hers, and she expected to hate it, to feel ill.
He didn’t force her, only brushed his lips against hers, then pulled away. “I’m sorry.”
“For what?” she said. It felt like she was floating.
As he knelt up in the grass, her heart raced. He held her tight and kissed her again so sweetly that she felt safe. She broke out in a broad grin in the middle of his third kiss. He sat back and cocked his head with an equally big smile.
If she had a lick of sense in her head, she’d get up and run, but Paige nuzzled up beside Sterling and let her concerns drift away.
He held her tight. “Paige, I swear, I’d do anything for you.”
“Don’t let Dotty hear you say that.” She tapped his chest.
“Please don’t judge her too harshly. She tries to look out for me and sometimes gets a bit overzealous. It’s well meaning.”
“If you say so.” Paige sat away from him, trying to get her bearings. This was crazy. It didn’t even make sense, but she found herself staring at his lips, hoping he’d kiss her again.
“What are you thinking?” He waited for her answer.
It would be so easy to let herself get swept into being part of his life. She couldn’t think clearly with him so close. “I think we should go back.”
“Okay.” He hopped to his feet and put out a hand to help her up.
As she stood, he held her. “I just need one for the road.” He ran one hand through her hair, the other rested on the small of her back. She didn’t resist.
He kissed her as if he cherished her. It wasn’t hungry and selfish but soft and inviting like he wanted her to taste what she could look forward to if she was willing to give him a chance.