Her Last Love Affair (9 page)

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Authors: Clara James

BOOK: Her Last Love Affair
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Silently, Allie nodded her head.

“So, let’s not label it,” he urged, moving close enough to
touch her, but keeping his hands to himself. “It’s not a relationship, but it’s
more than sex. We don’t need to know any more than that.”

Allie considered that proposal. It didn’t solve all her
problems, but with him standing there completely naked, it was incredibly
tempting. “Can we think about it?” she asked quietly.

“Okay,” he replied, with a nod. “On one condition,” he
added.

“What’s that?” she asked.

“That we go back to bed right now,” he smiled, cocking his
head at the mattress.

Allie couldn’t prevent the smile that spread across her
face. “I don’t know,” she murmured, with mock suspicion.

“If I haven’t left yet, it’s still the same date, right?” he
asked jovially, both arms reaching out to her and tugging her towards him.

“That’s your logic, is it?” she giggled.

“Yep,” he confirmed proudly. Keeping a firm hold on the
sheet, he spun her before pushing her back onto the bed. The sheet stayed with
him, unraveling from Allie, until, when she landed on the mattress, she was
naked once more.

She laughed loudly as she fell, screeching when she realized
he was ripping the sheet from her. However, her laughter soon tapered off, when
she noticed Reece wasn’t laughing with her. “What’s wrong?” she asked, looking
up at him.

Reece was gazing back at her, a look of horror on his
features.

“What is it?” Allie quickly blurted when she was met with
silence.

Reece’s jaw slackened in dismay, as he lifted his hand and
pointed at her torso.

Allie followed the line of his finger and found herself
looking at a large blue bruise beneath her left breast. She didn’t notice Reece
moving, but he stepped towards her and placed his palm on her right knee.
Allie’s eyes flashed to his face in alarm. She opened her mouth to speak, but
was forestalled when Reece gently parted her legs. There, on her inner thigh,
was another bruise, this one much larger than the first.

“I hurt you,” Reece whispered, barely able to say the words
for the bile rising up from his stomach.

“No,” Allie quickly stated, covering his hand with her own.

“Look at you,” he mumbled, flinching and sweeping his hand
out from beneath hers. “They weren’t there last night, Allie,” he said,
standing straight and raking his fingers through his hair. “I did that to you.”

“It’s not your fault,” Allie tried to placate him. “I
just….I bruise easily,” she awkwardly explained.

“Allie,” he shook his head, disbelievingly.

“It’s true,” she insisted. “I’m a little anemic.”

Reece stood silently, watching her carefully, as he seemed
to assess whether her body language suggested she was telling the truth. He
couldn’t make up his mind. The fact that he remembered the night well and was
certain he hadn’t been even remotely rough with her supported her explanation.
And yet, something in her eyes troubled him.

“I promise,” she added sincerely. “You did not hurt me,” she
insisted, looking him directly in the eye.

That, he was fairly certain, was the truth. “Are you sure?”
he urged.

“I swear, Reece,” she stated, shuffling towards the edge of
the bed, until her legs were hanging off the end. “Now,” she sighed, desperate
to change the subject. “What were you saying about coming back to bed?”

 

***

 

Tossing her purse into the deep bottom drawer of her desk,
Allie kicked the thing closed before angrily throwing herself into her chair.

“Hey, you feeling any better?”

Lifting her head to the sound of Grant’s voice, Allie
scowled at him. “Huh?” she asked.

“Are you over the flu you had last week?”

“Oh,” Allie finally sighed, remembering the excuse she’d
given for taking the latter half of the previous week off work. “Yeah, thanks,”
she grumpily added.

“You’re a little late, I was wondering if you weren’t coming
in today, either,” he noted good-naturedly.

“You keeping track of me?” she snapped.

“No,” he innocently replied. “No, I was just worried about
you.”

Allie had wanted to take another day off. She’d intended to
do just that. However, after she’d been unable to convince Reece to get back
into bed with her, she felt too depressed moping around the apartment.

He’d left shortly after discovering her bruises, although
he’d assured her that he no longer believed he’d hurt her, he still felt
responsible for harming her. No matter how many times she told him she hadn’t
even known the marks were there, he refused to make love to her again.

He’d gone, leaving her with nothing more than a kiss on the
forehead and a promise that he’d call.

“I’m sorry, Grant,” she sighed, leaning both elbows on the
desk and massaging her temples with her index fingers. “Things are just…” she
stalled, before changing tact. “Anyway, I shouldn’t be taking it out on you.”

“Hey, no sweat,” he replied, beaming at her like a loyal
puppy.

Allie had suspected for some time that Grant had a crush on
her. She’d brushed it off, because he was too young and she was too busy. His
willingness to excuse her bad moods and his eagerness to help with whatever
shitty job she called on him to do, were proof of something beyond professional
admiration.

As Allie allowed that thought to marinate, an idea came to
her. Perhaps all she needed to lift her spirits was a good screw. And Grant,
although not exactly the kind of guy she’d usually go for, was someone she knew
and would, undoubtedly, be only too eager to please.

“Grant,” she said picking her head up.

“Yeah,” he called back.

Allie opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came
out. She tried to picture herself with him, maybe in one of the store
cupboards, or upstairs in the morgue, amongst all the dusty old files. However,
the image just wouldn’t come. Instead, all she could see was Reece.

“Allie?” Grant probed, noting some kind of conflict behind
her eyes.

Shaking her head, Allie dismissed the thought of Grant and
tried to picture someone else. Kyle, he wasn’t bad looking. Stephen or Carl.
Still, the only face that occupied her brain was Reece’s.

“Are you okay, Allie?”

“Yeah,” she nodded numbly. “Sorry, I just…” she mumbled,
pushing her chair back and rising to her feet.

“Did you want something?” Grant asked.

“No,” she responded. “No, thanks,” she assured him, making
her way across the open plan office space. “I think I need a coffee,” she
absentmindedly tossed over her shoulder, as she plodded towards the break area.

She stood for several minutes, her fingers clamped around
the handle of the percolator, as she tried to work out what the hell had
happened over the course of twelve hours. Suddenly, her desire to make up for a
lack of sexual experiences was narrowed to a desire to simply have more sex
with Reece. This was something she hadn’t expected: that one of the men she’d
dated over the last few weeks would become a preoccupation. She thought about
all of the others fondly, she remembered her time with them as exciting and she
certainly didn’t have any regrets. But this was different, the night before
wasn’t just another good memory to add to the collection. Was he really that
good? She shook her head at the rhetorical question. He was absolutely that
good. However, there was much more to it than his performance.

There was no longer any question in her mind: she had to see
him again. Whether or not that fitted with the original plan didn’t matter.
Whether he had seen bruises on her body didn’t matter. The only thing Allie
cared about was spending another night with Reece. She could only hope that one
more night would be enough to quench her thirst for him.

Chapter Nine

One Last Night

B
ut one more night, turned into two nights, three,
four and then five. The frequency with which she saw Reece was complicating
matters. Allie had taken to trying to cover her bruises with foundation.
Sometimes it worked well, especially when she was able to wake before him and
apply the make-up to the blue patches of skin. Other times, Reece noticed the
discoloration. However, Allie was satisfied with the fact that he believed her
to have anemia and, as long as he didn’t see any large or particularly bad
contusions, she felt sure he would continue to believe that.

Lying to him was not something that came easily, though.
Truth be told, she hated it. She couldn’t look him in the face whenever he
mentioned the marks on her flesh or the fact he thought she’d lost a little
weight.

And it was all made so much worse by the fact that the more
time she spent with him, the more time she wanted to spend with him. She loved
being in his company, it didn’t matter what they did and it had gone far beyond
just fulfilling a sexual desire. On the third night, they didn’t even have sex.
Instead, cuddled up on her couch, watching an old Cary Grant movie, they’d both
drifted off into peaceful sleep and remained there ’til morning.

She was happy, happier than she had been in a long time.
Ironically, the knowledge of that made her profoundly depressed, because she
was acutely aware of the fact it couldn’t last. She’d found true happiness, a
man she could imagine herself growing old with, and she wasn’t going to get the
chance to grow old at all. Her low moods were yet another cause to lie to
Reece. She’d tell him she had a lot on at work, that she was stressed and just
needed to unwind, which, at first, he had no reason to disbelieve. As time
passed, she knew he’d begin to suspect there was something more to her mood
swings.

Meanwhile, she’d been cancelling or postponing dates with
old flames she’d met online, including Mitch Hatley. He continued to write and
send text messages, while she politely stalled him. Allie was reluctant to give
up the idea of grabbing that particular lost opportunity, but, at the same
time, wondered if she could ever want to sleep with any man except Reece - she
certainly couldn’t imagine it. Her dreams were filled with him and her waking
fantasies refused to drift to any other man, no matter how handsome.

In short, Allie knew that her relationship with Reece, for,
like it or not, that’s certainly what it had become, had to end. She simply
couldn’t continue to lie, and she didn’t want to torture herself with the taste
of a life she would never really get to experience.

But breaking things off was going to be difficult. Like a
crack addict, she lacked all will power around him. He only had to flash a
glimpse of that gorgeous smile or say her name in that deep, baritone voice of
his and she was unable to resist. Nevertheless, she had to find the resolve
from somewhere.

 

***

 

“You’ve been quiet,” Reece noted, reaching for the glass of
Shiraz in front of him.

Allie was just pushing the food on her plate around, feeling
far too sick to put anything in her mouth. “I’ve just been thinking,” she
shrugged.

“About?” he prodded.

“Us,” she replied, sucking in a steadying breath, as she
mentally prepared herself for the conversation she’d rehearsed a hundred times.

Reece could see she was nervous and guessed good news was
not on her mind. “Okay,” he nodded, replacing the glass on her small kitchen
table and leaning forwards. “What is it?” he asked.

“Reece,” she sighed, staring at the fingerprints he’d left
on the glass. “I told you, I can’t be in a relationship right now.”

“I know.”

“So, we can’t do this anymore,” she continued, realizing
that he simply didn’t see the problem.

“Why not?” he smiled.

“Ree-”

“Look,” he quickly interrupted, knowing exactly what she
would say if he allowed her to continue. “You said no relationship, we’re not
in a relationship.”

“Do you know how many times we’ve seen each other over the
last several weeks?” she argued, leaning back exhaustedly against the
uncomfortable wooden chair.

“Most nights,” he admitted. “But that doesn’t mean
anything,” he added. “There’s no pressure, Allie,” he urged. “You’re busy,
that’s fine. You don’t want to tell your parents that we’re dating again,
that’s fine, too.”

“Reece,” she muttered, shaking her head.

“It’s completely casual, Allie. If that’s what you want, you
got it.”

Drawing in a shaky breath, Allie tried to remind herself of what
was at stake; why she had to call a halt to things now. “And what do you want?”
she asked, wondering if a different angle would help her cause.

“What do you mean?”

“Let’s forget what I want for a second,” Allie said, meeting
his eyes. “What do you want?”

Placing his palms on the table either side of his plate, he
glanced down thoughtfully. “Honestly,” he mumbled. “I don’t know.” Turning his
eyes back to her, he shrugged one shoulder exaggeratedly. “I’m not promising
you romance and roses, Allie, because I don’t know where this is heading any
more than you do. What I do know is that I like being with you.” He paused
momentarily, before smiling to himself. “I
really
like being with you,
so I’ll take whatever it is you’re offering.”

“I’m not offering anything, Reece,” she responded sadly,
tears welling in her lower lids.

Refusing to answer right away, Reece sat quietly, running
his fingers up and down the stem of the wine glass. “You want me to go?” he
asked.

“I can’t offer you anything,” Allie continued, ignoring the
question. “I should never have let things go as far as they did. I shouldn’t
have agreed to meet you in the first place,” she told him, hot tears beginning
to spill onto her cheeks. “Sooner or later, this has got to end.” Sniffing she
tried to hold back the droplets that trailed zigzag patterns down her cheeks.
“I think it might be better for both of us, if we just end it now.”

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