Hector (43 page)

Feeling how hard he was again or maybe
still,
she moved against it, wanting him to rub against her. She
was so hot again she could hardly stand it. Obviously picking up on what she
wanted, he began to sway his hips slowly, and if he didn’t still have her hands
pinned, she actually would have felt brave enough and the absolute need to
touch him
there
.

Without warning, he stopped, and she could feel his pounding
heart against her. “But you’re a virgin, and . . .”

He didn’t finish and she froze. Hearing the icy chill of the
subtle yet shattering rejection brought back all the insecurities she’d managed
to do away with and keep at bay in the past twenty-four hours. Now
she
was the one wondering what the hell
he
meant?
The
new girl she’d been in the last days being around him, the girl who’d actually
begun to feel worthy of the affection Hector had given her, was suddenly gone.
That girl might’ve had the guts to ask. Instead, she reverted to the old her
and cowardly closed her eyes. Bracing herself, she waited silently for him to
continue.

Chapter 26

Deliberating on how to explain this exactly, Hector
struggled to come up with something that didn’t sound ridiculous. Abel’s words
continued to rattle him.
Are you sure
you’re ready to handle being so hung up on a girl?
At the time, he had
been. Hell, just a few minutes earlier he had been. He’d been fairly certain
just from what little he knew about Charlee that he was dealing with a virgin.
It hadn’t felt so alarming until now.

Hector was sure he was ready to be with Charlee and only Charlee.
But he’d had his share of experimenting with plenty of girls. Testing the
waters—lots of waters. Charlee was only eighteen. Aside from that idiot she’d
told him about, this was her first real experience. And this was literally
happening overnight. How could she be sure he was the one this quickly? Because
if this happened, he wanted to be damn sure he’d be the
only
one for her after tonight.

Abel was right. There’d be no way he could handle anything
otherwise, and, suddenly, that scared the life out of him. Did people really
fall in love, break up, and move on? His eyes slowly opened wider with the
realization of where his mind had just gone.
Love?
No way.

Charlee pushed him off her suddenly, derailing his train of
thought. He’d been so lost in thought she managed to push him aside and squirm
out from under him.

“In what world is a virgin not good enough?” She asked as she stood
up, crossing her arms in front of her. “Are you looking for someone more
experienced?
Less priggish?”

“Priggish?” he asked, getting up on his own feet quickly and
noticed the hurt in her eyes now. “No!
Whatever that means.”

He had no idea what priggish meant, but whatever it did, he
didn’t like that it had those beautiful blue eyes looking so sad. Taking a step
forward, she took a step back. “So then finish what you started saying,” she
said, lifting a very pretty but stubborn little chin. “Remember you’re the one who
said no guessing games.”

Taking another step toward her, he stopped when she moved away
from him again. “Okay, let’s not do this,” he said, pointing at the recliner.
“Can we just sit and talk?”

“No!” She walked around the sofa and stood behind it, making it a
barrier between them. “I will not sit on your lap again to talk about
this
. Just explain yourself,”

She looked so damn cute when she was angry he had to smile. “All
right, you don’t have to sit on my lap. Just sit, please.” He motioned at the
sofa in front of her.

Considering it for a moment, she glanced down at the sofa,
chewing the corner of her lip, then walked around and sat down cautiously. Hector
took a few slow steps to the sofa, afraid that she might jump up and bolt. But
she didn’t, so he sat down.

He stared at her for a moment again, debating on how best to say
this. “I don’t know if I can handle this.”

Her startled eyes stared at him. “You changed your mind?” Gulping
hard, he reached for her hand, but she jerked it away, standing up. “Then go!”

The tears in her eyes had him on his feet instantly. “Charlee,
it’s not that I changed my mind. I swear it’s just that . . .”

“Go!” She pointed to the front door. “You don’t have to explain
yourself. I don’t mind
guessing
,
Hector. Just leave.”

He took her hand, and she tried pulling it away, but he held it
tight. “Listen to me.”

“No!” She was crying now, and it killed him, but he wouldn’t let
go of her hand even when she continued to try to free herself from him. “I
don’t even wanna hear it anymore. Just leave. I don’t want you here!”

“Charlee,” he tried, speaking calmly in order to calm her, but
she was really crying now. “Listen to me, baby,” he said as he backed her up to
the wall, pressing his body against hers, trying to pin her down so he could
talk to her—explain. But she kept squirming and fighting to get away from him.
“I think I love you.”

His words silenced her, and she stopped moving, staring at him as
she continued to breathe harshly. He kissed the tears that continued to drip
down the side of her cheek.

“I don’t understand,” she whispered, searching his eyes for
answers.

Finally letting go of her hand, he cradled her face in his hands
now. “I didn’t even realize it until a few minutes ago,” he wiped the corners
of her wet eyes with his thumbs. “But I think I’m love with you, Charlee, and if
that’s the case, I don’t know if I can handle doing this and
you
changing
your
mind later.”

She shook her head, her questioning eyes still searching his.
“Why would I change my mind?”

“Sweetheart, you’ve never been with anyone else. How do you know
for sure this is it for you?”

“I don’t? Do
you
?”

He stared at her for a moment, feeling a little disappointed.
Secretly he’d hoped she’d say she was, but her throwing it back in his face
made him think. Was he?

“I don’t know. All I know is if this happens—if we do this—I
won’t be able to handle it if you do.”

She brought her hand up to his face and caressed it. For the
first time since she’d become so upset, she smiled. “I think that’s the chance
everyone takes when they give into their hearts. I don’t think I’d be able to
handle it either if you changed your mind.” She glanced away, giving way to
that timid smile he
knew
he was in
love with now. “I think we just got a little taste of how I’d handle it if you
did.” She kissed him softly, and he kissed her back, wrapping his arms around
her waist. “I’d still be willing to chance it if you are.”

Squeezing her even tighter, he buried his face in her neck,
breathing her in. He loved the way she smelled, loved the way her small frame
fit so perfectly against his body.

“I can promise you one thing,” she whispered in his ear as she
ran her hands through his hair. She had his attention, and he pulled away to
look at her. He sensed a little hesitation before she spoke again, and there
was a hint of insecurity in her eyes. “Unless I’m way off, and I have been in
the past, unless you are this talented of an actor and the sincerity I’m
feeling when you speak of your feelings for me—this trust that you’ve talked
about taking so seriously isn’t all real—then I promise you that can’t imagine
anything
making me change my mind about
you.”

Seeing the insecurity in her eyes gave him a little hope that he
wasn’t alone in just how damn scared this made him. His brother may be older
and wiser, but when it came to love, he was just as inexperienced as Hector.
This wasn’t something you just decided you were going to do. It was something
that happened, and there was nothing in your power to stop it.

“I love you,” he whispered, and she smiled, her big blue eyes
immediately flooding with tears.

“This is crazy, but I love you too.”

His heart pounded away with fear, excitement, and now
exhilaration of knowing she was in love with him too. Picking her up like he
had yesterday, he kissed her deeply. With both her arms and legs wrapped around
him now, he started toward the sofa, but she pulled away and pointed. “My
bedroom is that way.”

God help him. This was really going to happen.
Screw the fear
. Hurrying toward her bedroom,
he kissed her madly. He’d deal with his fears later. There was no choice now.
Either he learned to handle what Abel thought and what Hector had begun to
believe that he couldn’t handle, or he walked away, and he wouldn’t even
consider that now.

Laying her down gently on the bed, he scooted onto it with her.
Their lips never once parted even as he lifted his body over hers. Continuing
to kiss her, he stopped every now and then to stare at her lips. He loved how
red and swollen they were. The fact that he was responsible for how damn sexy
they looked now drove him nuts.

Bringing her arms up above her head like he’d pinned her down
earlier in the front room, he laced his fingers through hers, staring into her
eyes. He leaned in and slowly began to kiss her freckles like he’d imagined
doing when he first noticed them. He started on her forehead, kissing each freckle
softly, and then he worked his way down her temple.

Rubbing himself against her leg, he wanted her to feel just how
aroused doing just this made him. She squirmed in reaction to feeling him, and
he began to sway his body very slowly against her like he’d begun to earlier
but had stopped. Only now, he didn’t stop, and she
swayed
with him, spreading her legs a bit. Knowing if he adjusted himself just
slightly he could be rubbing up against the very spot that would drive them both
crazy, he didn’t. He wanted to—needed to—take this as slowly as possible. This
may be the first time for her ever, but it was a first for him as well, and he
wanted to savor every moment. Savoring it drowned out the enormous fear he’d
begun to feel earlier about making
love
for the very first time, putting his heart out there as he never had before.

Working his way down the warm soft flesh of her face, he reminded
himself, as he mentally was already beginning to claim each and every one of
her beautiful freckles as his, that he could handle this. He kissed the freckles
on her nose just under her eyes and around her delicate cheek bone, and then he
worked his way down her jaw but couldn’t help going back to bury his tongue in
her red swollen mouth again. She kissed him back urgently, lifting her legs
around his so his thigh rested now on the heat between her legs. Imagining burying
himself in another red swollen part of her body had him squeezing his eyes shut
now. He had to hold it together, or this might get embarrassing.

He began to ease her sweater up, and she sat up, helping him with
it. She pulled it over her head and disposed of it quickly over the side of the
bed. Awestruck, he stared at the milky white skin on her shoulders, chest, and flat
stomach. There were so many more freckles for him to claim sprinkled all across
her torso.

Starting just under her chin, he began kissing his way down. He
kissed and sucked softly, down to the very edge of each shoulder. Pulling the
straps of her bra down her shoulders, he brought it down until both of her
beautifully pale breasts were completely exposed. Hector stared at them. They didn’t
get any more perfect than this—perfectly full, pure, untouched, and his mind
once again went there—
all
his
.

With his breathing accelerating, he focused on the coat of
freckles sprinkled all over them. The coat was heavier around her cleavage and the
only hint of color on her otherwise powdery white skin, aside from the very pale
pink nipples that almost blended with the skin around them. He quickly latched
onto one with his mouth, sucking softly then biting down gently. Hearing her
soft panting and breathing grow even more frantic only made him suck harder.

Trying desperately to keep moving slowly was a challenge,
especially now that her body trembled uncontrollably with every suck of her sweet
nipples. He stopped for a second to pull off his shirt, needing to feel her
flesh against his. She took that moment to undo her bra completely and took it
off. Now she was completely naked from the waist up. He stared down, gulping
hard. It took everything in him not to reach down and rip her pants off her. He
wanted nothing more than to drive into her now—claim her. But
why
did the very thought still scare him
so much?

Easing himself back down, his heart galloped away furiously.

“The heart is forever inexperienced,” Charlee whispered, and
Hector froze, staring at her.

“What did you say?”

She reached her hand up and touched his chest with her fingers. “Henry
David Thoreau. There’s something I didn’t know about you, that you’re into
poetry, but I’ve also wondered for a long time what this was,” she smiled timidly,
biting her lower lip but continued touch his chest. “I even
Googled
your name and the word tattoo to see if I got a hit and nothing.” Tracing the
words with her fingers, she glanced at him then back at his chest. “What does
that mean to you?
And the broken heart.”
She lifted
her eyes to him again, a bit confused, her own naked chest rising and falling from
her still accelerated breathing. “Your heart’s been broken?”

“Yes,” he whispered, lowering himself onto her, “but not like
you’re thinking.”

Jack’s words couldn’t have come at a better time. “The letters on
the bottom are the initials of Jack, the late founder of 5
^th
Street,
and the only father figure Abel and I had since our dad died. I’m not big on
poetry. It’s just something he used to say to us a lot.”