Heat of the Moment (19 page)

“Thank you.” He dragged his hat from his head. “Look, ma’am, I don’t want to appear rude, but I really need to see Holly. Is she home?”

“Why, no. She and the Admiral and Mrs. Durant have already left for the parade.” She beamed at him. “They’re riding in the antique Jeep that you drove out from the lake house, but they needed to be at Hargrave Academy early in order to line up. I understand there are a number of marching bands in the parade.”

Shane tried to tamp down his impatience. “So they’re gathering at Hargrave Military Academy before the start of the parade?”

“Why. yes, but they were having breakfast with the town officials first. They left about an hour ago.” Her voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper. “Why, I heard that the Governor himself is planning to attend.”

“That’s great. Do you know what time the parade is due to begin?”

“Why, I believe it starts at eleven o’clock, because the speeches begin promptly at noon, followed by the barbeque on the common.” Her aged face creased into a warm smile. “I’ve baked over a dozen pies for the occasion.”

Shane smiled. “I’ll be sure to try a slice of each.”

Ann frowned. “The Admiral didn’t believe you’d make it back in time for the parade. I think Holly thought so, too.”

Shane felt his chest constrict. He’d told Holly that he would be back in time; had she given up on him so easily? He thanked Ann and turned away from the house to make his way slowly down the steps, kicking at the loose gravel in frustration. The sound of a car engine turning into the driveway made him look up in hopeful anticipation, but when he recognized his father’s pickup truck, he groaned. The last person he wanted to see was James Rafferty.

He leaned against the rear quarter panel of the Mustang and waited as his father turned the engine off and climbed down from the cab of the truck. He looked tired, with lines of weariness etched around his mouth. Shane saw he wore a dress shirt and tie, and a pair of jeans that looked almost new.

“Hey, Dad,” he said, keeping his arms folded across his chest. “What brings you out here?”

“I thought I saw your car over on Chalk Level Road, and I guessed you were headed here.”

Shane frowned. “Why would you think that?” He hadn’t told his father about his relationship with Holly; he hadn’t shared anything about his life with his father in years.

“Son,” his father replied, pushing his hat back on his head, “there isn’t much you do that I don’t know about. There never has been.”

Christ.
Shane fervently hoped that was an exaggeration.

“I know you think I’ve been a poor excuse for a father, and the truth is that I let you take on too much when you were just a boy.” Removing his hat, he scrubbed a hand across the top of his head. “I depended on you for so much. Too much.” He gave a self-deprecating laugh. “And you never let me down.”

“Dad…” Shane didn’t want to have this conversation with his father. Not now. Not ever.

“No, hear me out, son. I know you’ve blamed me for your mother’s death all these years, but no more than I blame myself.”

Shane felt his chest grow tight. “I don’t want to talk about her.”

“We have to talk about her, son, or we’re never going to get past what happened. I loved your mother, and I couldn’t imagine what it was she saw in me—a horse trainer. She could have had her pick of any fine gentleman in Lexington, but she chose me. When her parents turned their backs on her, I didn’t want her to regret her decision. I tried to make her happy.”

Shane narrowed his gaze. “How? By buying her stuff? Dad, I remember her crying because you were never around. You were always chasing the next Triple Crown winner, convinced that if you could just achieve that glory, she’d finally see you were worthy of her.”

His father hung his head and turned his hat around in his hands. “You’re right, son. I thought if I could prove myself to her, that she’d see she made the right decision.”

“But she always believed she made the right decision, dad. She loved
you.
It was always you she wanted, not the big house or the fancy address, or the fast car. Just you.”

His father cleared his throat. “I see that now. But I was too young and focused on myself to realize that in trying to give her what I thought she wanted, I was letting her down.”

Shane blew out a hard breath, but couldn’t keep the anger or accusation out of his voice. “You left her alone all the time. Is it any wonder that she began drinking? Staying out until all hours? She gave up everything for you. You were all she had.”

His father raised his head and his expression was bleaker than Shane had ever seen it. “I failed her and I failed you, but I don’t want you to make the same mistake I did.”

Shane thought of Holly and her privileged upbringing. But Holly wasn’t like his mother; she was strong and independent. Material possessions didn’t define Holly. At least, that’s what Shane kept telling himself. He’d managed to save a good chunk of change in the eight years since he’d joined the military, and he could afford to buy a decent house, but he was never going to be wealthy.

“I don’t intend to make the same mistakes you did,” he said grimly.

His father looked away as if considering whether or not to speak, then turned back to Shane. “I’ve seen the way you two look at each other, son. And I’ve seen the way your face goes all tight whenever anyone mentions her name. I know you have feelings for Holly Durant, and you’re probably thinking you’re not good enough for a gal like her.”

His father was right. He wasn’t good enough for Holly Durant. He never would be, but fool that he was, he’d try like hell to be the man she needed.

“I’ll never be able to give her this,” he acknowledged, gesturing expansively toward the elegant Victorian and the surrounding gardens. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t have anything to offer her.”

To his astonishment, his father laughed softly. “That’s right, son. You have more strength and determination than any man I’ve ever met. You were just a kid when you left school and went to work full time to support me. How many boys could have done that?” He took a step closer. “I know you think I was too far gone to notice, but I realized the sacrifices you made for me.”

“So what are you trying to say?” Shane asked.

“I’m trying to say that you already have everything that gal needs. Because all she really needs is you.”

Shane drew in a slow, steadying breath. He couldn’t believe this was his father talking. In the past ten years, they’d never discussed his mother, and certainly not the events leading up to her death. Now he wondered if he hadn’t been too hard on his father. After all, he’d tried to give his mother everything he’d thought she needed. He just hadn’t figured out that all she needed was him.

Shane looked up, surprised to find his sight a little misty. “Dad…I know I’ve been rough on you…”

To his surprise, his father caught him in a tight hug. “No, don’t say anything else. I’m proud as hell of you, boy. I just want you to know that.” Releasing Shane, he stepped back. “Now don’t you have a parade to get to?”

Shane cleared his throat, which had become suspiciously tight. “Yeah. Do you, um, want to ride over with me?” He gave his father a crooked grin. “Hell, why don’t you drive the Mustang? I hear you handle her pretty well.”

His father chuckled. “I’d like that very much.”

Shane glanced at his watch. “Well what are we waiting for? I made a promise to her, and I intend to keep it.”

Shane sat in the passenger’s seat and watched how his father handled the Mustang, admiring his easy confidence and control behind the wheel. Most of the main roads into town had already been barricaded to traffic, but his father took several creative detours and within minutes, they were pulling into the parking lot of Hargrave Military Academy.

Shane barely waited for the car to roll to a stop before he climbed out with a hurried thanks. The lot was congested with traffic that included military and police vehicles, fire engines, several floats, Clydesdale horses pulling a beer wagon, and what looked like the entire southern Virginia 4-H club. He dodged in between the vehicles and the people as quickly as his cast would permit, his eyes scanning the crowds until he found what he was looking for.

A 1944 Willys Jeep.

The Admiral sat behind the wheel with Emily in the passenger seat and behind them, perched on the back of the rear seat, was Holly. Like himself, she was in full dress uniform, and Shane thought she looked both nervous and unhappy, although she smiled at those who came to wish her well and shake her hand. An enormous wreath adorned the front bumper of the Jeep, made of red, white, and purple carnations.

Sidestepping around two drummers, Shane made his way over to the Jeep and leaned on the wheel well, smiling into Holly’s astonished face.

“I said I’d be here, didn’t I?” he asked, out of breath.

“Shane!” Holly devoured him with her eyes, a slow smile spread over her face and Shane thought he’d never seen anything quite as beautiful. “I knew you’d make it.”

The Admiral turned in his seat. “Son, I suggest you climb in, or you’re going to end up getting left behind.”

“Oh, no,” he protested. “I’m not riding in the parade. I just came by to wish you luck.”

But Holly scooted over on the seat and caught him by the arm. “No, you have to ride with me.”

“Holly…”

“That’s an order, Sergeant,” she said softly.

The Admiral chuckled. “I’d do it if I were you.”

Frowning, Shane climbed into the back of the Jeep and sat next to Holly as the Admiral threw the vehicle into gear and began to slowly move out of the parking lot and onto the main road.

“This isn’t right,” Shane muttered. “This is your day, and I don’t want to take away from it.”

“You’re not,” Holly assured him, and laced her fingers through his. “You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.”

The Jeep turned the corner onto Main Street, and for the first time, Shane saw the enormous banner that spanned the road overhead.

Chatham’s Hometown Heroes

“While you were in Washington, I had a call from the Inspector General, confirming what really happened to my daughter that day in Iraq,” the Admiral said over his shoulder, keeping one eye on the road. “Son, if you hadn’t risked your life to protect Holly, she might not be alive today.”

Emily turned in her seat and smiled at him. “All it took was one call to have those banners changed. They should have included your name from the first day they were raised.”

Shane looked away, both embarrassed and touched by the gesture. “Thank you, ma’am,” he said gruffly. “I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything.” Holly leaned against him to speak into his ear. “But if you don’t smile and wave at these people, they’re going to believe you really are one bad-assed solider.”

Shane chuckled. “I’m not?”

“Not from where I’m sitting.”

He smiled. “I’ll have to work on that. Can’t have you thinking I’ve gone soft.”

Holly burst out laughing.

“My future.”

He saw the quick flash of anxiety in her eyes, but she quickly masked it and smiled at him. “And what does your future hold?”

He let his gaze drift over her face, lingering on her full lips. “You, I hope.”

She smiled tremulously. “Yes, I hope so, too. What else?”

“I’d like to finish out my career with the military.”

She focused on one of the buttons on his jacket. To her credit, she didn’t protest. “I understand. You’re a good soldier. It only makes sense.”

“I’ll make a better officer.”

Holly’s gaze jerked upward. “What?”

Shane couldn’t prevent the grin that spread across his face. “I finished my master’s degree last year and have been playing with the idea of entering Officer’s Candidate School. I met with Captain Aubrey in Washington about the investigation and after we talked, he told me that he’d read my file and thought I would make an excellent candidate.”

Holly gave a bark of stunned laughter. “He’s right. You would.
Absolutely.
I can’t believe I never knew you were taking graduate-level courses. You never even finished high school.”

“I didn’t have a choice about that,” he said drily. “My dad needed me and I needed to keep a roof over our heads. I took my GED when I was seventeen and began taking college level courses whenever I could.”

“But don’t you see? You did have a choice, Shane. And you chose to keep what was left of your family together, even though it meant sacrificing your own dreams. I’m not sure many teenagers would have done what you did.”

“He was my father, no matter what I thought about him. I knew my mother wouldn’t have wanted me to abandon him, but I’ll admit that thought did cross my mind.”

“You’re not the kind of guy to turn your back on someone who needs you. You never have been.”

He slanted her a doubtful look, but couldn’t prevent a small smile from curving his mouth. “You’ve always had an unrealistically high opinion of me.”

“Lieutenant Rafferty,” Holly mused, ignoring his remark. “I like the sound of that.” She slanted him a suspicious look. “Does this mean you’ll be the one issuing orders?”

Shane laughed. “You bet. But I can also promise that you’ll enjoy following them.”

“I’m leaving the military,” she retorted, “so I won’t have to follow them.”

“You’re sure about that?” Shane pulled back to look at her. “Your arm shouldn’t prevent you from doing what you love.”

She made a face. “I’m not sure the Navy is what I love. I don’t regret the time I’ve served, and I’ve learned a lot about myself because of the military. But do I love it?” She smiled. “I love that it brought me closer to you, but I think I’d really like to settle into civilian life. Maybe I’ll try my hand at photography.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“I love photography.”

Shane laughed. “You don’t have to convince me. I’m still traumatized by the memory of you following me around with that damned camera. I think it sounds like a great idea.”

“Mmm-hmm. I think so, too.”

Tightening his arms around her, he drew her head back to his shoulder. “I just can’t believe how this all turned out. Five weeks ago, I thought I’d lost you.”

“Crazy man. You were the reason I chose to go to Iraq in the first place. You didn’t think I was going to let you get away so easily, did you?”

“You were almost killed because of me.” He couldn’t keep the torment out of his voice. “I’ll be honest with you. I feel like a fraud accepting any kind of recognition for what I did that day.”

Holly pulled back and looked at him, surprised. “Why?”

“Because what most people don’t know is that I’m not a hero. I did what I did because I’m in love with you. I think I have been since the first day that I saw you. I never had a choice about trying to save you.”

Holly laughed softly and wound her arms around him, uncaring of who watched them. “That’s where you’re wrong. You always had a choice. And that’s what makes you a hero.”